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  #31  
Old 11-11-2002, 07:10 PM
adduncan adduncan is offline
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Here's a thought from an "oldie" <g> going through a self-created "second rush" as an alum.

The point of sisterhood is supposed to be a life-long process. It doesn't end at four years. Any sorority that told me "what's the point, you're graduating in a year or so", I would say to them, "If your sisterhood expires after only four years, it can't be much of a sisterhood."

Just some food for thought.

--Adrienne
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  #32  
Old 11-11-2002, 08:42 PM
IowaHawkeye IowaHawkeye is offline
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Hey all just thought I'd update you on "wannabegreek101" The funny thing is, i actually know her, she goes to Iowa with me - but didn't realize it by her posts!

after she accepted her bid - she informed me that she had been posting on gc after i told her about it to get some tips for informal rush

she just registered as Tri-Delt_Phi, but she hasn't recieved her confirmation email thingy so she can't post yet.

As you can see from the name she chose, yes she's a Delta Delta Delta! I'm so happy for her, she has wanted to be greek for awhile!
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  #33  
Old 11-11-2002, 08:43 PM
FuzzieAlum FuzzieAlum is offline
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I agree - up to a point. Imagine if a chapter only gave bids to seniors. After a year or two, everyone would graduate one spring and how would they rush next fall?

Now obviously that is an extreme case. But for some chapters, rushing only freshmen is a matter of practical economics.

Let's say ceiling is 100, and just about every chapter on campus is close to that. A chapter just has to take in 25 new members once a year to be at ceiling. Generally speaking, quota will be around 25 or a bit higher - if it gets a lot higher total will be raised or another chapter brought on.

What happens if you give bids to only seniors? You'd have to give out 100 bids a year. Basically, the older your new members are, the more often you have to rush to replace them to stay at ceiling. But you can't take much more than quota through formal. That means you have to do COB. But if no one else is doing COB, people say, "Oh, they must be in trouble." Paradoxically they are in trouble, PR-wise, if they don't do COB, since they are the "small chapter."

You could say, "So?" But if the chapter has a house, they may need to keep it almost full in order to pay for it - unless they just want to rush based on income, which I think we can agree is a bad idea.

So on certain campuses, if the standard is to just bid freshmen, and a chapter can maintain their size by doing so, the system practically forces them to bid only freshmen. That's certainly not the case anywhere, but it is some places. To someone in a system like that, rushing as a senior is unheard of.

Now that still doesn't excuse that person for thinking "a year isn't worth it," but in fact the majority of alums are not involved. They stay friends with a few sisters, but that's it. They don't use their sorority to meet new people in new cities, they don't contribute monetarily or in volunteer time, and to them their sorority is "just a college thing."

It's kind of like saying, "People under 21 shouldn't drink." It may be true, but it doesn't stop the majority of college students from drinking, even people who generally consider themselves law-abiding. Just because a sorority says their duty is to be involved for life doesn't mean most sisters really believe it or live it. It's one of those cases where ideals clash with reality. Most of the alums you see here on GC are obviously exceptions.

But most people are only in it for college, and if you think sorority life is a college thing, saying, "One year isn't much," does make sense.
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  #34  
Old 11-11-2002, 09:36 PM
amycat412 amycat412 is offline
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VERY well said Fuzzie Alum.
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  #35  
Old 11-11-2002, 09:42 PM
33girl 33girl is offline
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Something else to remember - at a lot of schools, the notion of graduating in four years is a complete fantasy. Either because of problems getting into a class or probs w/ $$$ a lot of people will be there 5 or 6 years. There are instances where someone is just barely a full time student, taking only classes in her major, and for the first time has gotten her act together and finally has time to give to a sorority. These can be some of the most awesome members you have!
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  #36  
Old 11-11-2002, 11:21 PM
Tri-D_Phi Tri-D_Phi is offline
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Sorry it has taken me so long to post, but I have been very busy with school, work, and my new sisters! In case you missed Nicole's post, I am no longer a "wannabe" greek, I am a Delta Delta Delta now! It is still so surreal to me! I can't believe they offered me a bid, especially since I am a junior! I was so excited and happy and shocked when I found out. My sister ended up faxing the chapter here a legacy form, and we both know a few Tri Deltas here, so I think that helped! DDD is probably one of the best sororities here at Iowa (that's where I go! I think someone sent me a message asking) so I still can't believe I got in. Although they were at total, apparently a couple of their pledges dropped and that made room for me! So thank you to everyone who gave me advice and supported me!
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  #37  
Old 11-12-2002, 03:46 AM
breathesgelatin breathesgelatin is offline
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congrats to you and Tri-Delt!
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  #38  
Old 11-12-2002, 04:27 AM
leilanimoon leilanimoon is offline
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a few things to add

I actually have a few things to add being that im a junior who went thru formal rush this quarter and was cut heavily. it sucks..and leaves u slightly bitter for a long time, at least in my case, because you're left wondering, was i cut because i was a junior, or did they just not like me? how come THAT junior over there with the tiffanys necklace got invited back every night to all the houses and i didn't? i thought we had a good conversation and they really seemed to like me, what went wrong? did i say something wrong? should i have told them i might be here longer or will they think im a slacker? should i really try again in informal or will i just be embarassing myself? is it, if they didnt like me then, why would they like me now, or was it a financial thing and they thought i was great but they had plenty of freshman to choose from and could only take a limited number of juniors? ill have even less time as an active than now so why would they still want me!?!

i couldnt control the fact that i transferred to my school and didn't join before. i started out at University of Florida and went through rush there but I had a feeling I wouldnt be staying all four years, so I dropped out of rush very early. In some ways, at least in a greek perspective, it was the worst thing I couldve done because ive always wanted to go greek and now it seems like it's too late. i'm a minority, and have checked out nphc, and multiculti orgs, but i still feel more attracted to npc because when i look to the members in them, they are more representative of my friends back home and the types of people i'm used to. i came from a very urban, diverse town where all kinds of people mix just fine for the most part and i come to my university and see a definite divide. no one here is blatantly racist and i really feel if more minorities rushed here, thered be more in the npc orgs, yet, i see people in my race shunning me for not hanging around with enough blacks, or on the other hand, some blacks or mixed blacks who won't look at me and who go on record as not liking blacks and automatically prejudge me.

it's really very rough because i have such an open mind and open heart but what's sad is that some people are so quick to prejudge. i felt very disheartened being cut by a lot of top houses simply because i was taking it as "wow, if they couldnt see me as their "type" or as their "sister", who would?". when i would talk to each girl in each house i always tried to envision which girls id normally gravitate towards, whether i knew they were greek or not, and thats what made my decision for which houses were tops on my list and to think that perhaps it wasnt reciprocated is really hard to swallow. But, at the same time, I can look at it in so many different ways, my class standing, being matched up with the wrong girl...it just leaves my mind in so much of a state of indecision and stress...it was all worth it, perhaps, but I still ask myself if, come this spring for informal recruitment if i should give it a shot or throw in the towel. it becomes hard to know when to say when when u dont even know where u stand...am i making sense?
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  #39  
Old 11-12-2002, 05:53 AM
GPhiBLtColonel GPhiBLtColonel is offline
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It can be tough LeilaniMoon but....

... I would say that if you REALLY want to be greek bad enough, then do try for informal rush...and this time give ALL the sororities a fair chance....while I know that there can be some prejudgements made by the sororities simply because of your year in school or maybe even something else, but from the rush threads I recall reading -- yours included -- the rushees also make prejudgements about where they think they should go -- WPISweetie's rush thread is about to close but if you take a moment and read it all the way thru. you will see the transformation she underwent during her rush...admittedly her school seems to have one of the LONGEST rushes on record (and that can be a good thing I guess) but she really did try to do her best with keeping an open mind, and she did!
So all I can say is to YES try informal recruitment and if you will be around longer, you can find a way to work that unobtrusively into the conversation...but really really really give ALL the sororities who do informal rush a fair shake -- (check out WPISweetie's thought process around the time she got her bid and signed her pref card...) GOOD lUCK! and keep us all posted!
P.S. I rushed as a junior -- not even a transfer student either -- at Southern Cal -- so it CAN be done!!
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  #40  
Old 11-12-2002, 06:20 AM
leilanimoon leilanimoon is offline
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my only thing about giving them all a fair shot is that the informal rush period tends to be a lot shorter, with all houses having their open houses around the same time and only maybe 2 sessions tops. oftentimes, too, i think how it goes is u go to the first one and then are INVITED to the second one, so if u miss the first one because u were at another party, too bad! most of the sororities on campus are pretty darn good. for me, it's not "xyz or nothing at all because i'll be a loser otherwise", no it's more about the general feeling i got in each house during formal rush because some that i didnt "feel" it in are considered THE BEST by some ppl i know and a few i really do like dont always garner a lot of respect from some people.

oh, yea, i dont know if i ever posted it on here, but when i first transferred to my uni back in january, i went to DG's spring informal in april and was not offered a bid but i really like the girls. should i rush them again or move on? i really don't want to waste people's time if they cut me for a reason, but i also don't want to sell myself short. that's what is so conflicting for me, is feeling comfortable being told "no" and knowing when to focus on something/somewhere else. btw, kudos to you on your successful rush at USC, i know it's competitive it is there and how big greek life is there.
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  #41  
Old 11-12-2002, 06:32 AM
leilanimoon leilanimoon is offline
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oh, another thing

other than the friends i had in one particularly sorority, i didnt have too many preconceived notions of any of the sororities going into formal rush. when i did the informal rush for DG, i chose them because, altho i know chapters are different from campus to campus, i remembered liking them at UF and wanted to see if there was a common thread as to why i liked them and if these girls here were as sweet (and they were), the other reason was mere convenience, their sorority house was right across the street from my apt. complex at the time and i saw their banners go up promoting it.

aside from that, and maybe this could be a shallow perception, but during formal i totally sided with whichever houses i had the best conversations in..after all, that was ultimately how THEY decided to invite me back too, at least partially, right? from my rush thread, remember my excitement at being invited back to round 2 by 2 houses i really liked? that giddiness is what i remember most and thats the only memory I have now because in my major, there are no greeks in my classes this quarter so I can't further evaluate. i keep my ears and eyes open, though, and am on the lookout for events, philanthropic and otherwise to meet girls in orgs I'm interested in.
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  #42  
Old 11-12-2002, 02:15 PM
CarolinaDG CarolinaDG is offline
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I just wanted to add a piece of info to the AZD's post. I do actually go to a school where total is 100 and quota this year was around 60, which brings some chapters' sizes to around 150. Yes, some chapters try to avoid taking non-freshmen, just because of what AZD has said. You still will find, however, at least one sophomore in every pledge class. We only have one this year, but last year we had three sopohomores and two juniors. It all varies from school to school, like everyone has already said, but this is just an example of the situation here.
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  #43  
Old 11-12-2002, 09:30 PM
Fewdfreak Fewdfreak is offline
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Tri-Delt_Phi! Who hoo! Another Iowa Greek on GC, congratulations on becoming a new member of Delta Delta Delta!
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  #44  
Old 11-18-2002, 02:14 AM
Tri-D_Phi Tri-D_Phi is offline
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Thanx so much! I really love being Greek here at Iowa! I've meet so many cool people, they guys are so much fun, the girls are nice.

Go Delta Delta Delta!
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  #45  
Old 11-18-2002, 05:13 AM
skjackee skjackee is offline
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I went through Formal Rush as a Sophomore and was a bit scared about it, but it turns out that there were quite a few 2nd and 3rd years going through rush, and there were quite a few who got bids (like myself). There was one girl, however, a second year who rushed her first year and didn't get a bid, and got dropped after the 3rd night of rush her second year..
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