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  #181  
Old 01-31-2005, 12:48 AM
LSUgrrl126 LSUgrrl126 is offline
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sugar and spice (and everyone else for that matter) -- I'm really sorry if my posts have made it seem like I didn't give all of the chapters a chance. I went into rush with an open mind -- I was going to do my own thing (instead of staying w/my best friends) and knew that there were no true "top chapters" compared to the others. All of the chapters were great and throughout the past semester I've met some really great girls from each sorority. I think it would be an honor to be asked to join ANY of these sororities because they are all outstanding, in my opinion. I talked about 4 that I would accept a bid from because those were the 4 groups that kept me the longest throughout the week. I felt the most comfortable there and could see myself with them. That being said, I did not cut any of the chapters nor did I have a preconceived notion of which ones were "the best." The chapters that cut me after first round were the same ones that I didn't really "click" with during the parties. I was not surprised in any way whatsoever because I had the mutual feeling that I wouldn't mesh with them. These 4 chapters that kept me around were (and still are!) awesome. I was truly torn about which one I felt was the best for me. I do admit, I didn't know too many girls in Greek Life at LSU. I went to a small high school and most of my older friends went away for school instead of staying close to home by going to LSU.

As for the organizations thing, at the club sign up day (or whatever you want to call it) our 300 some odd clubs were all (or nearly all) represented. It was quite overwhelming for me considering there were so many people and I had a limited amount of time between my classes. I'm sure I overlooked some of the organizations but we're having another one on Wednesday and I have a good amount of time to spend checking out different organizations and my goal is to find at least 1 organization to get involved with.

Soooooo, back to the topic of the thread....I really just wanted to say that at some larger schools, girls might not end up where they're meant to be simply because of sheer numbers and limited spaces and lots of really great PNMs. I didn't know if anyone on GC was aware of the LSU chapters' rule "cut once, cut always." Is this a common thing for chapters to do? I just found out about this rule a few days ago, so I'm just now trying to get over not being able to be in a sorority, because this was a big deal to me. I'm greatly sorry if I have offended anyone in any way.

As some GCers have suggested, starting a local sorority is a good idea. I read the thread (well not the whole thread) about getting a local started at UCSC so I sort of have an idea of how I could go about doing it, but since LSU has a Panhellenic Board, how would I do it then? And would Greek Affairs really give me a list of the girls who didn't receive bids?

This is really where a new thread should start. PM me if you have any advice/suggestions/complaints/etc.
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  #182  
Old 01-31-2005, 05:44 AM
kddani kddani is offline
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you should read this thread: http://forums.greekchat.com/gcforums...threadid=43119
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  #183  
Old 01-31-2005, 04:08 PM
dgfromtx dgfromtx is offline
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LSUGrrl...check your PM...I dare not post my two cents here.
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  #184  
Old 06-20-2007, 01:47 PM
carnation carnation is offline
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bump
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  #185  
Old 06-20-2007, 02:30 PM
SigKapCoug SigKapCoug is offline
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When i went through recruitment, I was cut by all but 3 chapters - two of which i had tried to cut - after the first round.

I don't remember being upset, and decided to focus on the three i did have (though it sucked other women we going to 10 parties.. and i went to three!).

I think you DO end up where you belong - the chapter I joined I had originally not liked much but as I got to know the women better through out the week I fell in love with the chapter. It took me an hour and a half to rank after pref (deciding between Sigma Kappa and XYZ).

I actually ended up preffing SK second, but regretted it almost instantly I was so excited to get a bid from them!

I think I'm a case where the chapter DID know better than I did about where I fit. Now, as a junior, I don't think I would have been as happy in XYZ.

Did I end up where I thought I would? No. Did i end up where I belonged? Yes.

I'll always wonder why I was cut by 10 chapters after first round, but it doesn't really matter, you know? I had no idea wtf was going with recruitment or greek life in general and I'm sure I shot myself in the foot, but I love where I am!
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  #186  
Old 06-22-2007, 04:18 PM
adpiucf adpiucf is offline
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Realistically, "you'll end up where you were meant to" is the same sort of cliche as "Hindsight is 20/20."

In other words, s***t happens. Recruitment is competitive. You could be cut for your grades, your year in school, lack of sponsor recommendations, a "do not bid this girl" warning from an alumna, being someone else's legacy, your lack of activities/involvement, your social reputation in high school or college, your attitude, your personality, maybe even something like not looking like you fit in from *horrors* the way you dress yourself to the way you take care of yourself, or any number of factors that will never be explained to you because membership selection is private and any records are shredded following recruitment.

You're never going to get accurate feedback into why you were cut. It sucks. It's easier to get a bid on certain campuses than on others.

But at the end of the day, I hope you have better reasons for being at your university than joining a sorority.

And I hope you know that those girls who got into sororities are going to experience rejection and disappointment in their lives, too. And at some point, you may go through this again when you apply to grad school or a new job, get passed over for a student leadership position or a promotion at work.

As our moms always say, "Sometimes life just isn't fair."

It's hard to accept the consolation "I'm sorry you didn't get into a sorority, but there are lots of ways to make your college experience special" when you had your heart set on getting into a sorority, but sometimes life just plays out that way.

So yes, at the end of the day, you will end up where you were meant to be. It's kind of like finding a lost of set of keys-- they're always in the last place you look.

It's disappointing to be cut from a top choice or to not get what you want, but every person on this earth goes through that kind of disappointment at some point in our lives. Even Paris Hilton.

Cheer up!
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  #187  
Old 06-22-2007, 04:32 PM
carnation carnation is offline
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Amen to that and I want to star what she said about how *the girls who make the sororities that you want to be in will face failure too*. There was one girl at Auburn who made everything you could make at Auburn, everybody loved her...and right after she graduated, she killed herself with carbon monoxide. No one ever knew why. There was a set of twins at Arkansas: they were the Queen PNMs when they rushed and after they got their top sorority, they got everything they tried out for on campus. A few years later, one killed her kids and herself and the other one tried to do the same thing.

Now I realize that these are way extreme examples but I'm trying to say to the girls who were or may be cut from their dream sororities: NO ONE has a perfect life, no one! I have seen so many hysterical girls during and after rush who say that this girl or that had a perfect rush and now the rest of her life will be perfect. Nope, not gonna happen.
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  #188  
Old 06-22-2007, 06:36 PM
UGAalum94 UGAalum94 is offline
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Yes, I think it is worth remembering: your recruitment results may seem like a temporary setback, but it really doesn't determine the outcome of your life one way or another.

BUT, when a young women goes off to school, and she has hopes of having an amazing new chapter in her life, and she ends up getting cut from what she sees as the "beautiful people" sororities, it doesn't help her in the moment to tell her that she really only belongs in the chapters that in that moment seem to her to be not-so-great for whatever reasons.

Yes, she should be encouraged to give all the groups a try and if she signs a bid card and matches, by all means, encourage her to try to bloom where's she's planted. But don't tell her that there was really no possibility that she ever belonged in the other superstar groups unless you're just feeling mean.

And that, as I see it and I think as Carnation originally commented, is the problem with telling people they end up where they belong.
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  #189  
Old 06-22-2007, 06:40 PM
UGAalum94 UGAalum94 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by adpiucf View Post
Realistically, "you'll end up where you were meant to" is the same sort of cliche as "Hindsight is 20/20."

In other words, s***t happens. Recruitment is competitive. You could be cut for your grades, your year in school, lack of sponsor recommendations, a "do not bid this girl" warning from an alumna, being someone else's legacy, your lack of activities/involvement, your social reputation in high school or college, your attitude, your personality, maybe even something like not looking like you fit in from *horrors* the way you dress yourself to the way you take care of yourself, or any number of factors that will never be explained to you because membership selection is private and any records are shredded following recruitment.

You're never going to get accurate feedback into why you were cut. It sucks. It's easier to get a bid on certain campuses than on others.

But at the end of the day, I hope you have better reasons for being at your university than joining a sorority.

And I hope you know that those girls who got into sororities are going to experience rejection and disappointment in their lives, too. And at some point, you may go through this again when you apply to grad school or a new job, get passed over for a student leadership position or a promotion at work.

As our moms always say, "Sometimes life just isn't fair."

It's hard to accept the consolation "I'm sorry you didn't get into a sorority, but there are lots of ways to make your college experience special" when you had your heart set on getting into a sorority, but sometimes life just plays out that way.

So yes, at the end of the day, you will end up where you were meant to be. It's kind of like finding a lost of set of keys-- they're always in the last place you look.

It's disappointing to be cut from a top choice or to not get what you want, but every person on this earth goes through that kind of disappointment at some point in our lives. Even Paris Hilton.

Cheer up!
Yep. It is what it is. There's nothing you can do about it. Because it has worked out this way, this was the way is was "supposed" to happen.

But it's cold comfort when it contrasts with what a young women wanted to happen. I think we're on the same page.
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  #190  
Old 06-22-2007, 06:43 PM
UGAalum94 UGAalum94 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by carnation View Post
Hey guys--

So often when a rushee posts her experiences, someone will say, "Don't worry, you'll end up where you were meant to!" or something along those lines. It worries me every time because you know how quirky rush is and sometimes "our" GC rushees don't get bids.

Furthermore, PNMs at the big schools--like SEC schools--very often do not end up in a sorority where they were meant to be. The sororities have to cut big numbers right off and I have seen so many heartbroken PNMs who were active, involved, precious, leaders in their schools, well-liked, you name it--who found themselves with only (shall we say) "troubled" sororities from which to choose. Can't you just picture their dismay if they think that's all they're good for? And no, not all women want to take the bull by the horns and try to turn around a very weak group.

I've put off posting this for months because I didn't know how to say it in a PC way but finally decided I had to say it. Women from SEC schools will understand!
You said it really well here, Carnation.
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  #191  
Old 06-25-2007, 09:21 AM
adrie435 adrie435 is offline
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It is really interesting to go through this thread and read the comments from the women who truly do believe in this idea of "going where you belong". I am a firm believer in it and I, like many of the others who believe it, was dropped hard by my top sorority after pref and joined the so-called weaker chapter... Looking back, I would have been bored to death in the top chapter and sure it could have helped my social life out better than my current chapter, but I wouldn't have been nearly as active or enjoyed it as much. I think it all boils down to giving everyone a chance and if you are willing to look at everyone and not just the 'name' sorority on campus, you will end up wehre you were meant to be-- Greek Life with women who can be your best friends if you give them a chance.
Some chapter on campus may not be your idea of the 'top' sorority to join during recruitment, but they are somebody else's top tier and definately the top chapter to all the active members.
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  #192  
Old 06-25-2007, 02:33 PM
ThetaDancer ThetaDancer is offline
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^^^ Just so you know, LSUgrrl's post is from 2005.

ETA: Ooops! I just read the top of your post where you realized it had been bumped.
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Last edited by ThetaDancer; 06-25-2007 at 02:41 PM.
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  #193  
Old 07-31-2007, 02:47 PM
AlphaFrog AlphaFrog is offline
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Time for another bump.
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  #194  
Old 08-01-2007, 08:55 AM
LionTamer LionTamer is offline
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This reminds me of a weird rush incident. At the time, there were 16 sororities and we seemed to be a lot of great PNMs' "safety" sorority - we always had a 3 crowded preference parties, but ended up losing so many of our favorites to the "top 3".

So it was our last pref party, I was tired and cranky, and I knew that the next day, most of my favorite girls would be going elsewhere.

I sat down next to a lovely girl, poised, beautiful voice, perfect posture, perfect hair, perfect makeup, and holding a yellow and red carnation and a little booklet with a kite on the cover, clearly indicating where she had visited before us (I won't mention what two other sororities were involved Note to youngsters: Back in the day, you were allowed to give PNMs small gifts - nothing valuable - tokens like flowers, hand-made booklets, etc.)

Anyway, she said "I have no idea how I'm going to make this choice. It's really going to be tough!"

OK. That was it. I'd had it.

I looked her right in the eye and, dripping sarcasm, I said "Oh, you know exactly where you want to go. Don't torture yourself, just go with your gut write down your favorite and leave it at that. You'll end up where you were meant to go."

The next day, much to my horror, there she was, in our suite. She came right over to me, hugged me and said "Thank you so much! I knew I wanted to go ASA, but everyone kept telling me different things. So I followed your advice, and you're right! It was easy!"

Thank God sarcasm goes right over some people's heads. And yes, of course she ended up as chapter President at some point, blah, blah, blah.
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Last edited by LionTamer; 08-01-2007 at 11:08 AM.
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  #195  
Old 08-01-2007, 09:18 AM
AlphaFrog AlphaFrog is offline
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Damn, I love you P!

I think that my favorite thing about ASAs is that I have yet to meet one that doesn't like to just speak her mind.
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