GreekChat.com Forums  

Go Back   GreekChat.com Forums > General Chat Topics > Dating & Relationships


Register Now for FREE!
Join GreekChat.com, The Fraternity & Sorority Greek Chat Network. To sign up for your FREE account INSTANTLY fill out the form below!

Username: Password: Confirm Password: E-Mail: Confirm E-Mail:
 
Image Verification
Please enter the six letters or digits that appear in the image opposite.

  I agree to forum rules 

» GC Stats
Members: 325,046
Threads: 115,496
Posts: 2,195,827
Welcome to our newest member, zjulafranceso30
» Online Users: 1,466
2 members and 1,464 guests
JayhawkAOII
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 08-10-2009, 03:53 PM
AOII_LB93 AOII_LB93 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California
Posts: 1,808
In-law venting thread

I know you've got to be out there...anyone have issues with their backstabbing two-faced bitch of a MIL?

Just wondering. I feel like I'm the only one, even though I'm not.
__________________
Adam and Eve were lucky, neither had a mother-in-law.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 08-10-2009, 04:04 PM
ForeverRoses ForeverRoses is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: right here
Posts: 2,054
My MIL is great- my BIL and (now ex) SIL- a whole different story. I avoid social family gatherings if I think they will be there.
__________________
So I enter that I may grow in knowledge, wisdom and love.

So I depart that I may now better serve my fellow man, my country & God
.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-10-2009, 04:13 PM
dreamseeker dreamseeker is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Taking flight
Posts: 2,585
Send a message via AIM to dreamseeker
i'm not married but my bf's mom used to make comments behind my back about my weight and smile and appear friendly in my face. she also talked a lot of sh*t abt our relationship. after 3 yrs she sees that things aren't going to crumble like she thought. so now she wants to act like we're buddies.

due to current circumstances i am forced to be around her a lot, but i cannot WAIT for the day that i will not have to see her so often.
__________________
"where my knights at!? why aren't ya'll representin??" - KASS
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-10-2009, 04:19 PM
AOII_LB93 AOII_LB93 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California
Posts: 1,808
Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamseeker View Post
i'm not married but my bf's mom used to make comments behind my back about my weight and smile and appear friendly in my face. she also talked a lot of sh*t abt our relationship. after 3 yrs she sees that things aren't going to crumble like she thought. so now she wants to act like we're buddies.

due to current circumstances i am forced to be around her a lot, but i cannot WAIT for the day that i will not have to see her so often.
Dream on...if you plan on marrying him, it's going to get worse not better. Speaking from experience here. She's fine in front of him, but she talks shit on me to her daughter, and anyone else she can find.

Thankfully she moved out of state.
__________________
Adam and Eve were lucky, neither had a mother-in-law.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-10-2009, 04:30 PM
srmom srmom is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,358
I'm trying to be a good mil! I love my DIL (probably as much as my son, but don't tell him that!) It helps to stay out of their business though when they're in Florida, and I'm in Texas!!

Now, I have a terrible step-mother who I call Madame X - She's a real piece of work!
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-10-2009, 04:36 PM
AOII_LB93 AOII_LB93 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California
Posts: 1,808
Quote:
Originally Posted by srmom View Post
I'm trying to be a good mil! I love my DIL (probably as much as my son, but don't tell him that!) It helps to stay out of their business though when they're in Florida, and I'm in Texas!!

Now, I have a terrible step-mother who I call Madame X - She's a real piece of work!
srmom,
I wish mine were like you, however she does all she can to stir up the drama between her family in general. She is a huge gossip, and when telling her daughter what not to do she uses me as the example. The ironic thing about it, is that I've been around for 10 years and have been really nice to her since the start.

I found an article I want to send her on how to be a good mother in law, but I know she would be hugely offended. I think she forgets that she was a daughter in law once too.

Sandy, you can totally play along...if you've been there long enough, it's almost the same.
__________________
Adam and Eve were lucky, neither had a mother-in-law.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-10-2009, 04:58 PM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 18,142
I have no in laws.

Most of my married friends have pretty nice MILs.

However, I intern with an office full of married women and I remember hearing a co-worker telling me about how her future MIL called her a "cougar" at her bridal shower and made her cry.

She had just turned 26 the week before the wedding and hubby was 23 and according to her MIL, that made her a cougar who was preying on her precious baby boy.

They haven't gotten along since.

__________________
"Remember that apathy has no place in our Sorority." - Kelly Jo Karnes, Pi

Lakers Nation.

Last edited by KSUViolet06; 08-10-2009 at 05:03 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 08-10-2009, 05:05 PM
dreamseeker dreamseeker is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Taking flight
Posts: 2,585
Send a message via AIM to dreamseeker
Quote:
Originally Posted by AOII_LB93 View Post
Dream on...if you plan on marrying him, it's going to get worse not better. Speaking from experience here. She's fine in front of him, but she talks shit on me to her daughter, and anyone else she can find.

Thankfully she moved out of state.
lol. without getting into too much detail, she wont have many ears...or at least not ppl i interact with/care about. one of the main reasons she had to stop was because my bf used to snap on her to stop throwing stones while living in a glass house.

now if she'd leave the state too...that'd be awesome. lol.
__________________
"where my knights at!? why aren't ya'll representin??" - KASS
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 08-10-2009, 05:07 PM
dreamseeker dreamseeker is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Taking flight
Posts: 2,585
Send a message via AIM to dreamseeker
Quote:
Originally Posted by OTW View Post
Can us gals in long term relationships play too?

For the most part, his mother is sweet as pie. I love her, I really do. But when drama occurs, she feels the need to be right in the middle of it. I (and BF feels the same way) really believe she's addicted to chaos. Same with his brothers.

Now I know why he moved away from his family as soon as he could.
i'm in an LDR too.
__________________
"where my knights at!? why aren't ya'll representin??" - KASS
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 08-10-2009, 05:08 PM
Munchkin03 Munchkin03 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Home.
Posts: 8,256
Quote:
Originally Posted by OTW View Post
Can us gals in long term relationships play too?

For the most part, his mother is sweet as pie. I love her, I really do. But when drama occurs, she feels the need to be right in the middle of it. I (and BF feels the same way) really believe she's addicted to chaos. Same with his brothers.

Now I know why he moved away from his family as soon as he could.
I think a lot of people are addicted to chaos and drama.

I had almost in-laws at one point; they were a major factor in why they are ex-almost in-laws. Let's say that I don't take financial advice from someone who has less money saved than my nephew. Awesome.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 08-10-2009, 05:19 PM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 18,142
I think alot of people make the mistake of thinking "oh things will be better with his parents after we're married."

That happens sometimes, but it's not typical.

If she hates you after like 2 years of dating, the wedding is likely not going to change that.

Same thing applies to "oh things will get better after we have kids."

Not likely. Then she'll probably criticize your parenting and drive you crazy. lol.
__________________
"Remember that apathy has no place in our Sorority." - Kelly Jo Karnes, Pi

Lakers Nation.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 08-10-2009, 05:36 PM
ComradesTrue ComradesTrue is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,930
I am lucky. My MIL is one of the most wonderful people on the planet and we would definitely be great friends even if we weren't related. Trust me, I take notes daily on the way that she interacts with my FIL, my husband, and most importantly me. I note the way she holds her tongue, offers genuine advice at the appropriate time, and mostly just how she treats people in general. I don't think I could have handpicked anyone better.

I have promised my 2 year old son that I will do everything possible to be as good a MIL to his future wife as she has been to me, so that his wife won't wind up in a thread like this.

For those of you who are enduring toxic relationships- I am sorry. A good friend has a terrible MIL and it has taught me to appreciate every day that I have with my own.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 08-10-2009, 05:54 PM
AOII_LB93 AOII_LB93 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California
Posts: 1,808
I just don't understand how mine can be sweet as pie to my face and then talk shit on me to my husband(which he has none of) and others in the family. She even emailed him once when she was thinking of moving back here and said, "Be sure to let your wife know I won't intrude. I know she's probably worried about that." Thankfully my husband emailed her that she needed an attitude adjustment and to stop bashing me because I've been a good wife to him and I treat her well.

The sad part of it is, that I actually liked her up until recently, been really nice and apparently she's just been shit-talking for years. I guess I'm not good enough for her son in her eyes.
__________________
Adam and Eve were lucky, neither had a mother-in-law.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 08-10-2009, 06:12 PM
dreamseeker dreamseeker is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Taking flight
Posts: 2,585
Send a message via AIM to dreamseeker
Quote:
Originally Posted by AOII_LB93 View Post
I just don't understand how mine can be sweet as pie to my face and then talk shit on me to my husband(which he has none of) and others in the family.
it could be her own issues. with my bf's mom, she's single and lonely, and relies heavily on him. so she views me as an intruder and someone who takes away attention from her. personally i think she is somewhat jealous. not as in she wants to date him, but that he is devoting his time and energy to me and not her.

and her not saying a thing to you is an indication that a) the issue is really with her and not with you, and/or b) she has no backbone.
__________________
"where my knights at!? why aren't ya'll representin??" - KASS
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 08-10-2009, 08:08 PM
aephi alum aephi alum is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Crescent City
Posts: 10,014
Ah... my monster-in-law. I could write a book.

My favorite story goes back a few years. My ILs are no longer members of a synagogue, so on the High Holy Days they inflict themselves upon us. It was Yom Kippur afternoon. I was trying my damnedest to stick to my fast, which had been going for about 18 hours at that point. The ILs came back to our house between morning and afternoon services. And my MIL DEMANDED THAT I PREPARE LUNCH!!! They purport to be Jewish, but they ignore the inconvenient parts of the faith, like fasting on the holiest day of the year.

There's her incessant whining that any beef or lamb that isn't charred beyond recognition might as well be raw, and that DH and I would DIE if we ate it. (I had to teach DH what a steak is supposed to taste like - medium rare!) There were the times she chewed me out for eating "raw fish" (sushi). She criticizes my wardrobe - too much black - to the point where, if I feel like being passive-aggressive, I'll wear all black when we see them. And the one time I joked that wedding planning was a lot of work and we should just elope, she SCREAMED at me about how she DAMNED WELL WOULD BE AT HER SON'S WEDDING!!!

And then there's the baby nagging. The ink wasn't even dry on the marriage contract when she started in. DH is an only child, so the only way she can have a grandchild is if we have children. She doesn't give a damn about how many sleepless nights we have, how many diapers we have to change, how pregnancy and childbirth would destroy my body, how much money we have to spend to get the latest and greatest for our baby (and did I mention she wants me to quit my job and be a SAHM rather than letting "her grandchild" be "raised" by day care?). She just wants her grandchild. Um. Yeah. If she wanted a grandchild sooo badly, she should have thought of that before she decided to have only one child and take the risk that he might marry a childfree woman.

I limit my contact with the ILs as much as possible. Unfortunately, I do have to put up with them from time to time, and I do so because I love my husband. There haven't been any major problems lately, mainly because everyone is on their best behavior when we do see each other, and DH has told his mother to lay off the baby nagging. Hopefully, that will continue.
__________________
AEΦ ... Multa Corda, Una Causa ... Celebrating Over 100 Years of Sisterhood
Have no place I can be since I found Serenity, but you can't take the sky from me...
Only those who risk going too far, find out how far they can go.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
A Little Bit of Venting! CatStarESP4 Dating & Relationships 3 01-15-2004 02:47 AM
venting Glitter650 Recruitment 3 09-18-2003 04:08 PM
venting StrokerTKE Tau Kappa Epsilon 8 04-30-2002 10:28 PM
Venting..... MaMaBuddha Delta Sigma Theta 33 02-04-2002 07:24 PM
i just need to do some more venting!!! RHOyal-Silence Sigma Gamma Rho 6 12-17-2001 07:27 PM



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:03 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.