Rejected

fonuconk · #1 04-10-2008, 08:45 AM

My university breaks down into trimesters, I recently rushed for a fraternity and recieved a bid. Then a few days later I got a call from my pledgemaster saying that they had a meeting and some of the older brothers were not there for the bidding and wanted me to "party with them to get to know them better" and rush again in the fall. Does this normally happen? Any advice to weather or not they were serious about this? Everything is kept a secret I do not know if they really want me back. I really wanted to join greek life and was majorly turned down and depressed by this. I couldnt understand, If they didnt want me why give me a bid in the first place?

LaneSig · #2 04-10-2008, 09:15 AM

Never heard of this situation. How badly do you want to belong to this chapter? If you want it bad enough, do what they are asking you to do.

Zillini · #3 04-10-2008, 09:51 AM

Never heard of anything like this happening before. Sounds like bids were "issued" before a chapter vote had been taken. The pledgemaster may have jumped the gun. That's not cool.

I admit I don't know nearly enough about IFC policies and the vast majority of my NPC experience is with formal Recruitment. This was a verbal bid, not written and the OP didn't mention signing anything. However it did come from the pledgemaster who is an official representative of the chapter.

I honestly don't know if it would be binding or not. Sorry I can't help but I am interested to learn from those who do know.

33girl · #4 04-10-2008, 10:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zillini

Never heard of anything like this happening before. Sounds like bids were "issued" before a chapter vote had been taken. The pledgemaster may have jumped the gun. That's not cool.

Yep.

I would wait until fall unless you want to come in under a cloud of resentment by a lot of brothers. Do you know if bids were issued to anyone other than you?

Senusret I · #5 04-10-2008, 11:03 AM

Man.....screw those guys.

I wouldn't want to be part of a fraternity which felt it was okay to screw with people in this way. There are several ways this mistake could have been handled and this was one of the worst.

33girl · #6 04-10-2008, 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Senusret I

There are several ways this mistake could have been handled and this was one of the worst.

I agree, but if the pledgemaster was enough of an idiot to hand out bids before he should have, I don't expect him to handle anything else with any sort of tact....and I'm guessing he was told "you made this mess, clean it up."

fonuconk · #7 04-10-2008, 11:55 AM

This happened to me and someone else. We were both given formal bids, majority of the brothers stood outside my dorm and handed me my bid invitation and had a big party for the pledges afterwards. A few days later is when I got the call. They gave out 6 bids and took back two. Is this even allowed?

33girl · #8 04-10-2008, 12:04 PM

Well, that changes things a bit.

They're dicking you around.

Tell them to go take a flying leap and find another fraternity that won't be a bunch of jerks.

Tom Earp · #9 04-10-2008, 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Senusret I

Man.....screw those guys.

I wouldn't want to be part of a fraternity which felt it was okay to screw with people in this way. There are several ways this mistake could have been handled and this was one of the worst.

Agree 100%.

I am sure you were voted on and just because some members were not there to vote and then said no? They want you to party a little more with them!!! BS. If you are treated like that now, what would the future bring?

Take your toys and go somewhere else.

fonuconk · #10 04-10-2008, 12:14 PM

Will that have an impact with other fraternities if I decide to rush again for another one? Im scared they will trash my name and I dont want to go through this kind of rejection again. I just cant get it through my head why they would do that to someone. I thought a few times about calling headquarters and finding out more but I know I will end up hated by everyone if I did that. There must be some rule about this. I still have my bid card; it was signed by the sage and the rush chairman.

jwsteele · #11 04-10-2008, 12:26 PM

Well I am probably not in your fraternity but I doubt there is a national rule on that...seing as a pledge can be released from the pledge program with ease in every fraternity (unless I'm missing one) they are probably allowed to do what they did. That being said it's weird that they want you to come around in the fall. Most of the time if you didn't work out as a pledge they'd tell you straight up.

My guess? They may be on some sort of probation or in trouble, whether from the university or their nationals. I know that at my school for rush infractions (wet rush, dirty rushing, underground parties, etc) a common punishment is a capped pledge class. Maybe they were told they had to cap their pledge class at 4 after they had given out 6 bids, picked their two least favorites or the two they felt they'd be able to hang onto and told them to wait for the fall.

violetpretty · #12 04-10-2008, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fonuconk

My university breaks down into trimesters, I recently rushed for a fraternity and recieved a bid. Then a few days later I got a call from my pledgemaster saying that they had a meeting and some of the older brothers were not there for the bidding and wanted me to "party with them to get to know them better" and rush again in the fall. Does this normally happen? Any advice to weather or not they were serious about this? Everything is kept a secret I do not know if they really want me back. I really wanted to join greek life and was majorly turned down and depressed by this. I couldnt understand, If they didnt want me why give me a bid in the first place?

That is such crap. I see that as the older brothers' problem, that's what they get if they don't think it is important to go to membership selection (I'm assuming they blew if off instead of having something much more important to do, since it was a group and the group consisted of older brothers.).
Any IFCers, correct me if this is wrong, but I think you will be eligible to join another fraternity the next term. I wouldn't join this one again.

33girl · #13 04-10-2008, 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by violetpretty

That is such crap. I see that as the older brothers' problem, that's what they get if they don't think it is important to go to membership selection (I'm assuming they blew if off instead of having something much more important to do, since it was a group and the group consisted of older brothers.).

After reading his other posts, I am betting the "older brothers need to meet you" story was an outright lie. That would have made sense if they took back all the bids they gave out (i.e. the older bros weren't there to vote on the pledges correctly), but 2 out of 6 - that stinks all around.

baci · #14 04-10-2008, 01:06 PM

I am sorry for this. Very.

Elephant Walk · #15 04-10-2008, 06:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SECdomination

I don't think they took away your bid. Sounds like they depledged you, which is perfectly acceptable.

Depledging isn't a rare occurance. Maybe happening so close to receiving the bid is weird, but nothing else about the situation screams "dickhead" to me.

We depledge around five guys a fall semester.