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  #1  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:04 PM
TakeALook TakeALook is offline
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"Go in with an open mind."

I understand that all PNMs are supposed to go through rush and let their hearts tell them where they belong because they fall in love with the girls and they want to be a part of their family and they feel at home and all of those wonderful things.
But how is it wrong to want to know what kind of reputation certain letters hold? I, for one, would be annoyed if I went through rush and joined a sorority that I was only so-so about (as many people will tell you to do at a big SEC school like mine) and then found out that they had been involved in a scandal a few years ago so everyone on campus now associates ABC with a lack of class. Well, awesome.
I'm just wondering why it's so bad to want to know reputations and stereotypes before getting into rush. Where is the line between being aware and closing your mind?
(This is a legitimate question and not meant to start an argument in any way.)
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  #2  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:13 PM
jennyj87 jennyj87 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeALook View Post
I understand that all PNMs are supposed to go through rush and let their hearts tell them where they belong because they fall in love with the girls and they want to be a part of their family and they feel at home and all of those wonderful things.
But how is it wrong to want to know what kind of reputation certain letters hold? I, for one, would be annoyed if I went through rush and joined a sorority that I was only so-so about (as many people will tell you to do at a big SEC school like mine) and then found out that they had been involved in a scandal a few years ago so everyone on campus now associates ABC with a lack of class. Well, awesome.
I'm just wondering why it's so bad to want to know reputations and stereotypes before getting into rush. Where is the line between being aware and closing your mind?
(This is a legitimate question and not meant to start an argument in any way.)
It depends. Sometimes stereotypes can be very very wrong. But sometimes there is some truth to them.

When I went through recruitment as a sophomore, I had seen the other sororities interact on campus with each other and with themselves. I knew I would not fit in with the other one but I gave them the benefit of the doubt during recruitment. Maybe they had a big pow wow before recruitment and were dedicated to change.

I can understand your thought process though. But 99.9% of the time "tent talk" and stereotypes are wrong.
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  #3  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:14 PM
Nanners52674 Nanners52674 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeALook View Post
I understand that all PNMs are supposed to go through rush and let their hearts tell them where they belong because they fall in love with the girls and they want to be a part of their family and they feel at home and all of those wonderful things.
But how is it wrong to want to know what kind of reputation certain letters hold? I, for one, would be annoyed if I went through rush and joined a sorority that I was only so-so about (as many people will tell you to do at a big SEC school like mine) and then found out that they had been involved in a scandal a few years ago so everyone on campus now associates ABC with a lack of class. Well, awesome.
I'm just wondering why it's so bad to want to know reputations and stereotypes before getting into rush. Where is the line between being aware and closing your mind?
(This is a legitimate question and not meant to start an argument in any way.)
While I understand where you are coming from, I am personally of the opinion that one should make their own impressions on the chapters and not get caught up reputations/tiers etc...

Because of those beliefs I don't talk about tiers on GC.
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  #4  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:25 PM
TakeALook TakeALook is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanners52674 View Post
While I understand where you are coming from, I am personally of the opinion that one should make their own impressions on the chapters and not get caught up reputations/tiers etc...

Because of those beliefs I don't talk about tiers on GC.
Isn't it possible to be aware of the tiers and reputations and not get caught up in them? Like, if I fall in love with the "ugly, fat girl" sorority, I'm still going to join it, but I'd like to know that other people have that stereotype so that I can actively work against it. Or, if I fall in love with the top tier, big name sorority, it's probably better to know that they are so competitive so that if/when they cut me, it's not devastating, right?
There has to be a way to hear all of the tent talk and take it with multiple grains of salt.
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  #5  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:27 PM
epchick epchick is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeALook View Post
I'm just wondering why it's so bad to want to know reputations and stereotypes before getting into rush. Where is the line between being aware and closing your mind?
Reputations are based on opinions and rumors. If you went into recruitment and met a group of girls who you absolutely LOOOVED, and you got along 100000% with them, would you turn your back on them if you heard that their reputation was not so stellar?

Reputations CHANGE. So you might get into the "pretty" or "OMG THEY ARE SO EFFING BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!ELEVENTY!!" sorority, and then in a year or so, you might be the "fat" sorority. Don't take stock in reps/stereotypes, they aren't worth your time.
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Last edited by epchick; 08-03-2010 at 11:30 PM.
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  #6  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:29 PM
AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Consider this: it works BOTH ways. Let me explain.

Had I listened to, or bought into, stereotypes/reputations, I would not have ended up where I did. To wit: I thought that there were chapters that were "too good" for me.

I went into "rush" with the attitude that I was going to have a great time, without any expectation of receiving a bid. I truly liked the women in every chapter, and they liked me back, because I kept getting invited to return. It was very difficult to have to "regret" invitations. The field narrowed and I was surprised that the two most popular chapters were actually interested in me. I was even more surprised to discover that I FIT there, comfortably. Preference was a painful decision.

And another thought: it only takes one incredible pledge class to completely turn a chapter around. I've seen it happen. So much for reputations and stereotypes.
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  #7  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:31 PM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeALook View Post
I understand that all PNMs are supposed to go through rush and let their hearts tell them where they belong because they fall in love with the girls and they want to be a part of their family and they feel at home and all of those wonderful things.
But how is it wrong to want to know what kind of reputation certain letters hold? I, for one, would be annoyed if I went through rush and joined a sorority that I was only so-so about (as many people will tell you to do at a big SEC school like mine) and then found out that they had been involved in a scandal a few years ago so everyone on campus now associates ABC with a lack of class. Well, awesome.
I'm just wondering why it's so bad to want to know reputations and stereotypes before getting into rush. Where is the line between being aware and closing your mind?
(This is a legitimate question and not meant to start an argument in any way.)
Here's the thing, reputation is almost NEVER based in facts.

99% of it is just what other people happen to THINK of ABC (not something factual that reflects badly on them and causes them to have that reputation).

It's all subjective and based in opinions which are largely based in rumor or what someone "heard."

Ex: ABC might be known as the "hot sorority" based on what some guys in one fraternity just started saying, and it just happened to catch on and be passed down through the years.

You don't want to make decisions in recruitment based on a reputation that really just comes from hearsay and opinions of others.

Also consider that at many schools, reputations change alot in the time that you are there. For example, the chapter at my undergrad that was considered the "hot girl" sorority back when I joined, is not considered that now.

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  #8  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:34 PM
BeeBee23 BeeBee23 is offline
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Sure, it's fine if you don't plan (or unknowingly) to use your "knowledge" to eliminate chapters before rush even starts. Even if you don't plan to do that knowing that ABC is the "fat, ugly sorority" WILL make you think negatively or be hesitant to not cut them.

Plus, any "scandals" youre talking about or could have taken place don't accurately represent the whole chapter. If a girl from XYZ got trashed and got into a bar fight and was arrested...that doesn't mean that the whole chapter would do that. Heck, theres probably at least one girl in that sorority who doesnt even drink. So wanting to know scandals and that sort of repuation isnt something I, as an active, would go around saying to PNMs because it's not an accurate portrayal. Every sorority is going to have strengths and weaknesses, and every sorority (especially on an SEC campus)is going to have members who make a mistake.

If you're honestly not worried about joining the "ugly, fat girl sorority" and you'll join if you love them...then why does it matter? Why do you need to know the reputations of the houses if you plan on accepting a bid so long as you like the house? (Unless you like a house simply because of it's spectacular top tier reputation)
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  #9  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:37 PM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
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^^^Right.

It's fine to know (because everyone is a tad curious).

However, using that info and deciding "well I don't want to be in ABC, XYZ, or DEF because of what I heard" really only screws you in the long run because you are cutting out chapters without giving them a shot.

Think of it this way:

If a chapter had heard that you had a bad reputation (based on opinions from other folks), would you want them to cut you on the spot based on what they heard from others?
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  #10  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:43 PM
BeeBee23 BeeBee23 is offline
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Adding to what Aztheta said, I think it should also be noted that as actives it's often easy to tell when a PNM is wanting/not wanting a house because of repuations and tent talk.

Example- Sally PNM only wants to be in a top sorority. ABC is a top tier house. XYZ is not. Sally goes to round 1 at XYZ and is completely rude. She then goes to ABC and is so nervous it shows...she also bad mouths XYZ.

Not only is it obvious by her actions that she is only considering certain houses. But Karen from XYZ is best friends with Meg from ABC and told Karen how mean Sally PNM was at their party. Meg tells her ABC sisters and they cut Sally PNM.

OR- Because of the dirty mouth Sally PNM has when she decides to trash talk XYZ, Meg from ABC doesn't like the attitude and gives Sally PNM a low score and she is cut.

Therefore, at the end of the day, Sally is cut from BOTH ABC and XYZ. so sad.
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  #11  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:45 PM
AXOrushadvisor AXOrushadvisor is offline
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I get it

Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeALook View Post
I understand that all PNMs are supposed to go through rush and let their hearts tell them where they belong because they fall in love with the girls and they want to be a part of their family and they feel at home and all of those wonderful things.
But how is it wrong to want to know what kind of reputation certain letters hold? I, for one, would be annoyed if I went through rush and joined a sorority that I was only so-so about (as many people will tell you to do at a big SEC school like mine) and then found out that they had been involved in a scandal a few years ago so everyone on campus now associates ABC with a lack of class. Well, awesome.
I'm just wondering why it's so bad to want to know reputations and stereotypes before getting into rush. Where is the line between being aware and closing your mind?
(This is a legitimate question and not meant to start an argument in any way.)
I think we are talking about 2 different things here. This is just my opinion, but if you keep an open mind and go through recruitment and join a chapter on campus that you love will you really care that some girls going through recruitment didn't think they were the best house on campus? Now if we are talking about social probation I think that is a different issue. At the end of the day, though, if you think ABC is the BEST house on campus, but they are on social probation do you not want to join here? I think we need to call a spade a spade because I'm guessing if ABC is the best house on campus you don't care if they are on social probation.

I don't think it is bad to know what a reputation is of a particular house, but remember that this it is my opinion. I might think ABC is trashy and you might think ABC is super classy. Who is right? If you listened to me then you would walk into the door thinking "this is the trashy group on campus, whatever, I don't care if they like me or not" in fact you wont even try because you want to be an XYZ and don't give a crap about ABC because they are so not you.

At the end of the day I think this is what this boils down to. I go through recruitment and because of tent talk I only want to be an XYZ. Really, I know NOTHING about them, I don't even know one person in the house, but EVERY ONE says "they are the best on campus" I have my heart set on them. I make it through round one! YAY! I dodged a bullet. Round 2 I'm feeling good XYZ invited me back and I'm sitting on top of the world. I just know that I am meant to be an XYZ. Everyone tells me "you would make the perfect XYZ" and they are the BEST chapter on campus (according to whose rules?). I walk to to get my invites for round 3 and NO XYZ?! WHAT!!!??? How could this be???!!! Everyone has told me I would be the perfect XYZ and they dropped me??!! That is the only house I want to join? I'm done, I'm quitting. I don't like or want any of these other houses I have been invited back to. This is what keeping an open mind is all about. The ability to look at the invitations you have left, go to the parties and carry on. I didn't get my first choice of a sorority when I went through recruitment. I carried on and joined a great house- perfect for me in every way. My niece was dropped by her favorites prior to preference, she carried on and joined a great house and had a great experience. So is it good to know what the reputations are? maybe, but in the end does it really matter? As far as the scandal goes?, IDK, what exactly is a scandal and a few years ago? IMO means 3 years it wont effect you at all. Keeping an open mind means that when all the chapters that you really love release you continue on and give other chapters a second chance. If after you fully participate in recruitment after preference your sitting there and HATE all your options, then lets talk. OK, so I'll step off my soap box now.
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  #12  
Old 08-03-2010, 11:57 PM
BeeBee23 BeeBee23 is offline
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Another thing to think about:

I went into recruitment wanting to join one of 2 houses, but I also kept an open mind but pretty much thought that I would fit in best with one of these 2. It took all of about 1 round of recruitment for me to realize I liked 3 or 4 chapters more than the original 2 I was thinking about. For round 2, I only had one of the 2 left and I still wasn't all that thrilled with them...but had my other top 4 and LOVED their parties. By the end of recruitment I had fallen in love with a house that I liked the best every round of recruitment and it was one that I didn't know anyone in and wasn't one of the 2 I thought I wanted to join. So, I got my first choice house, but it wasn't my first choice before rush started...but it was my number 1 all of recruitment.

I'm at an SEC school, like you are, and of course it's only natural to be curious of what the reputations are...I was. But I also remained very open minded. Maybe I'm not the best to offer you advice about not hearing the reputations because I ended up with my first choice and with a house my campus considers "top tier" but I also really liked some "middle" and "bottom" houses and had I listened to tent talk I might not have considered some houses even though I wanted to remain open minded the whole time. I didnt care so long as I LIKED THE HOUSE. So, I guess i'm saying to just be cautious of what you hear because it can really hurt your recruitment even if you dont intend it to.
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  #13  
Old 08-04-2010, 12:11 AM
TakeALook TakeALook is offline
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You guys make a lot of excellent points.
No, I'm not going to let some girl I meet under a tent completely alter my opinion about a certain group. However, if she reiterates statements that I've heard from seven other people that ABC is full of party girls, I'm going to take that information and ask questions when I go to that house about their social events to see how much emphasis they really put on partying while, if I hadn't heard about their reputation, I probably wouldn't ask the question. If the girl started gushing about how they go out at least 5 times a week so it's always a guaranteed good time, I'm going to know that ABC isn't really my scene since I like to go out a maximum of once a week. Does that make sense?
I get the whole "it goes both ways thing" and respect it.
Also, reputation matters. I don't mean that in a "omg i lyke totes want 2 b in XYZ cuz teh frats luv them" way, but in a "I'm going to wear a shirt with my letters on it and you're going to judge me for it and I'd like to be prepared for the things you think" way. It doesn't matter whether the reputation is based of fact or entirely fabricated because those people are going to treat you according to that reputation anyway. Yes, I would disregard a less-than-excellent reputation if I loved 100% of the girls in DEF and knew it was perfect, but if I loved 60% and couldn't yet decide if I felt "at home," a reputation I'd have to battle constantly would be a factor worth considering.
Social probation is something I have never even considered. Thankfully, none of the chapters at my school will be on social probation this fall (unless they royally screw up in the next few weeks)
I fully understand and agree with giving every chapter an equal chance regardless of whatever information you may have heard about them, but I don't think seeking the information is bad if you do it properly. One of my favorite houses going into this process is a middle tier at best sorority so, while I don't really care about tiers, I want to know what they are and what the dynamics have been for the past few years (as you said, things can change). But, then again, I'm also that girl who always needs to know what time it is for absolutely no reason. I guess I just like to know things, to be aware and ready.
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  #14  
Old 08-04-2010, 12:22 AM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
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Originally Posted by TakeALook View Post
You guys make a lot of excellent points.
No, I'm not going to let some girl I meet under a tent completely alter my opinion about a certain group. However, if she reiterates statements that I've heard from seven other people that ABC is full of party girls, I'm going to take that information and ask questions when I go to that house about their social events to see how much emphasis they really put on partying while, if I hadn't heard about their reputation, I probably wouldn't ask the question. If the girl started gushing about how they go out at least 5 times a week so it's always a guaranteed good time, I'm going to know that ABC isn't really my scene since I like to go out a maximum of once a week. Does that make sense.
Here's the thing with this scenario though.

You don't even know where those 7 people got their info from.

They could have gotten it from fraternity guys who just happen to see the same 5-10 ABCs at the bar every other day.

Or they could have gotten it from a friend who just happened to hear it from some other girl who maybe saw an ABC out at the bars drunk once or twice.

All of a sudden, ABC is the "party chapter."

You can't determine that a whole chapter parties everyday of the week based on the above info.

That's just an example of where a reputation can come from. It could be a generalization made about the whole group based on what someone heard about a group of members.

Also, even if a select group of girls DOES party a lot, that rep is hardly EVER applicable to EVERY SINGLE GIRL in ABC. You will find your share of non-partiers in any group.

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  #15  
Old 08-04-2010, 12:35 AM
epchick epchick is offline
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Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 View Post
Here's the thing with this scenario though.

You don't even know where those 7 people got their info from.
Exactly. Tent talk spreads like wildfire. Suzie PNM could tell people in her rush group how ABC is the "super popular thin" house, and how XYZ is the "ugly fat house" and people in her rush group are gonna believe her. Then those people will tell other PNMs and so forth. Soon more than 7 people are going to think of ABC and XYZ in those terms, regardless of how true it is or not.

You have to take it with a grain of salt. If you are going to alter your questions, do it for EVERY sorority. Ask all of them about their social events, instead of the ones that you hear reputations about...etc.
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