75 things

[Quala67]

Saw this on another chat board, and I thought I'd share...




75 Lessons that MUST be learned in relationships........


1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.

2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.

3. If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a woman's character, leave her alone.

4. Allow the Holy Spirit (or your “intuition”) to save you from heartache.

5. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

6. Don't force an attraction

7. Slower is better. [worthy of repeat] Slower is better. –in all things

8. Never live your life for a man/woman -period.

9. If a relationship ends because they were not treating you as you deserve then heck no you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.

10. Have faith in God regarding your relationship, but don't let faith make you stupid. God does things decently and in order.

11. Don't settle.

12. If you feel like they are stringing you along, then they probably are.

13. If he keeps changing his mind about the relationship--take that as a BIG sign that he is unstable. Do you really want to be with a man like that?

14. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.

15. Honorable men take care of their business and aren't involved in a whole lot of mess.

16. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

17. There's only one 'reason' a man dumps you; he doesn't want you.

18. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women, or a woman with and a bunch of “baby-daddies.” He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? How much is really left with so much already given away?

19. You really do have to kiss a few frogs before finding the prince.

20. Always put God, His Word and His will for your life first.

21. Always have your own set of friends separate from his.

22. Maintain boundaries in how you are treated. If something bothers you, speak up.

23. If he doesn't call, he just isn't that interested-let it go, move on…<br>
24. Be honest upfront and from upfront, straightforward.

25. Know when to cut the cord, don't be strung along.

26. Don't fall for the "I'm confused role". Remove yourself from the situation to let him figure things out (but don't wait for him, move on).

27. If you want to have a clue as to how he will treat you, watch how he treats the WOMEN in his family (not just mom).

28. There's more than physical abuse, there's emotional and mental abuse. If he causes any of them...flee. And no matter how attractive she may be, at the first hint of games and/or manipulation –move on elsewhere.

29. You cannot change a man's or a woman’s behaviors. Change comes from within.

30. Don't let him place rules on you that he is not will to follow himself --double-standard.

31. Don't EVER make them feel they are more important than you are...even if she has more education or in a better job.

32. Do not make them into a quasi-god... Pedestals are for statues. The only ground worthy of worship holds a talking burning bush. No bath water is good to drink and, he is a man, nothing more nothing less

33. Demand respect and if she can't give it, she can't have you, if he can’t give, he ain’t worthy…

34. Don't compete with other women, but be aware that men are visual and are attracted to what they see.

35. If you think he is cheating, he probably is. Confront her right away and if you feel she's lying, let them go.

36. Actions speak louder than words.

37. Never let a woman define who you are.

38. Never rely on a man for compliments, look to yourself for that.

39. Never borrow someone else's man.

40. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.

41. Just because he says he loves you, doesn't mean that he won’t hurt you and it doesn't mean that you are meant to be with him.

42. To use painful hard-won wisdom to 'get it right' the next time.

43 Know that after you put God first, you deserve to be the number one person in the life of the #1 person in your life.

44. Love is a verb...

45. Learn to give up your lifelong task of trying to make someone unavailable-available, someone ungiving-giving, and someone unloving-loving.

46. A woman will only treat you the way you ALLOW her to treat you –and vice-versa.

47. All men are NOT dogs and all women are not gold-diggers.

48. You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two way street.

49. If you don't love self...you can't love anyone else.

50. You cannot mend someone else's broken heart.

51. You need time to heal between relationships... there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.

52. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complementary...not supplementary.

53. Dating is fun, but know that the purpose is for marriage...if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right, don’t waste time, move on…

54. NEVER give more in a relationship than you are getting out of it.

55 Never become your man's "therapist" or your woman’s “daddy.”

56. When actions and words conflict- believe the actions. Respond to the actions.

57. A real healthy relationship requires two people. One person can end it - but it takes two to make it work.

58. Don't fall for the "I'm not the loving type"... when a man loves you there is nothing in this world (within reason) that he wouldn't do for you.

59. Make him miss you sometimes...but when a man always know where you are- he will trust you without reservation; if she misses you too much, she won’t feel secure and you will appear unreliable.

60. Give him his space...let him go out with his boys, don't pressure him to spend time with you. You can't force a man to hang out with you.

61. If you wouldn't allow your daughter to be with him you shouldn't.

62. Never let a man know everything. [see #7, again] If she asks too many questions, don’t see it as an opportunity to brag –unless you’re at a job interview. [see #7, again]

63. Never move into his mother's house. NEVER move into her house.

64. Provide financially for yourself and don't depend on anyone.

65. Never co-sign, a true adult can wait handle their business, and will not need a co-signer.

66. Never believe you have the perfect person and they is so innocent, the only perfect person was Jesus.

67. Never spoil your man, let someone else do it.

68. Never let a man –or woman- mess up your credit. [see #8]

69. When its time to let go, let go.

70. Good men should be treated like good men.

71. Don't play games.

72. You can't make a whore into a housewife - or husband.

73. Don't fully commit to someone who doesn't give all of themselves, the feeling that they’re holding back will never go away. Keep them in your radar but get to know others.

74. Compatibility in terms of educational goals/attainment, values, beliefs, personal and career goals, and socioeconomic status, are important, not absolute, but important.

75. Never date a guy who wears leather pants and/or colored contacts. Never date a woman less than well groomed (appearance, clothing, etc.).