My update

[dukemama]

Since my last post, I was contacted by someone affiliated with an NPC sorority that I tried (unsuccessfully) to recolonize during my undergraduate days. Since this organization is the only one to which I have a truly valid "link", it will be the only one with which I'll pursue AI if and when the time comes.

However...I am currently in a holding pattern with that group and have decided instead to investigate membership with Beta Sigma Phi. I have a tentatively scheduled meeting with some sisters in my area on 6/5, and although this particular chapter is probably not the best one for me (the average age of the membership skews higher than I would prefer) I figure it can't hurt to make some contacts.

Wish me luck!

dukemama

[susan314]

Originally Posted by dukemama

Since my last post, I was contacted by someone affiliated with an NPC sorority that I tried (unsuccessfully) to recolonize during my undergraduate days. Since this organization is the only one to which I have a truly valid "link", it will be the only one with which I'll pursue AI if and when the time comes.

However...I am currently in a holding pattern with that group and have decided instead to investigate membership with Beta Sigma Phi. I have a tentatively scheduled meeting with some sisters in my area on 6/5, and although this particular chapter is probably not the best one for me (the average age of the membership skews higher than I would prefer) I figure it can't hurt to make some contacts.

Wish me luck!

dukemama

Good luck!

I remember your earlier story about the recolonization attempt - can't speak for all NPC groups (or even "officially" for my own)), but IMO that sounds like a good connection/inroad to get an AI pursuit off the ground. (Whether or not an invitation to join depends upon the group itself and their own policies, of course, but it sounds like a valid enough link to warrant a group getting to know you a little better.)

That said, its still good that you're keeping your options open and investigating Beta Sigma Phi. While the present average age of your local chapter might skew higher than what you were hoping for, you could be just the spark they need to draw in some members closer to your age range. After all, its always in a group's best interests to draw in some younger members too - keeps continuity and stability in the group going. (That's the problem our local alumnae chapter is going through right now - we have an extremely dedicated group of members who have been active in the alumnae club for 30 years or more. The problem is that they are ready to retire/pull back a little, and there's no one waiting in the wings to take over leadership of the group. )

And let's not forget that although the average physical age might be higher than you were looking for, you might find that this group of ladies is very young at heart and still a lot of fun! Some of my closest friends these days are 10 years older than me, but it still feels like we're all the same age. (I'm 33.)

Good luck with your efforts.

[dukemama]

Originally Posted by susan314

After all, its always in a group's best interests to draw in some younger members too - keeps continuity and stability in the group going. (That's the problem our local alumnae chapter is going through right now - we have an extremely dedicated group of members who have been active in the alumnae club for 30 years or more. The problem is that they are ready to retire/pull back a little, and there's no one waiting in the wings to take over leadership of the group. )

Thanks Susan. I quoted you above because what you describe is what has happened to a group I was previously involved with, my local chapter of AAUW (Amer. Assoc. of University Women). Many of the women there were in their 50s and older, had been there for 20 years or more and wanted to leave the more time-consuming tasks of running programs and holding officer positions to younger members, who to my knowledge have yet to materialize (I went inactive with AAUW after the 2005-6 academic year). The lack of women with whom I could "identify" as a fairly young, working mom was the major reason I left AAUW although I still support them on a national level. The other reason was more political (I didn't like the direction the group was heading in under the leadership of the president at the time).

You've given me some good food for thought. Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised after I meet with the BSP sisters next week...I will say that the woman who invited me sounded about 30 years old even though she said she was 60!

[dukemama]

Unfortunately my husband was called down to DC on business that day and wasn't home in time to watch our 4-year old, so I had to take him along. Thank goodness the sister at whose house we met was very understanding -- she has a grandson the same age.

I liked the women a lot. They seem genuinely fond of each other and most of them have been together as a group for 20+ years! I left feeling that they would welcome me into their chapter, but I still think I'd fit in better with a younger group of women. Fortunately there's another chapter not far from me made up of a lot of moms with tots, and I've already exchanged several e-mails with their VP. I'll be attending a meeting with them most likely in July.

[twotimestalia]

Happy to hear you had a good time at the meeting. It can only get better. My first meeting was with members in their 30's and with kids. It was ok. The second was with older ladyies (30's, and mostly 50's+) I'm 23 and felt better with the 2nd group.

[dukemama]

Remember I said I was in a "holding pattern" with the NPC sorority with which I was planning to pursue AI? Well, no more! The president of the alumnae association in my area sent me an e-mail today and wants me to come to one of her group's meetings. WOW! Now I might soon be involved with BSP AND this sorority...would it be a bad idea to pursue both at once?

[Denise_DPhiE]

Originally Posted by dukemama

Remember I said I was in a "holding pattern" with the NPC sorority with which I was planning to pursue AI? Well, no more! The president of the alumnae association in my area sent me an e-mail today and wants me to come to one of her group's meetings. WOW! Now I might soon be involved with BSP AND this sorority...would it be a bad idea to pursue both at once?

I would suggest doing one at a time. The goals might overlap and you might be spread too thin. Do what your heart tells you! Be sure to ask what the reqs of AI membership in the NPC group are including time, monetary etc.

[dukemama]

Thanks Denise. I haven't gotten further than the e-mail contact stage with both groups so as of now I'm not experiencing any conflicts. But I certainly see how that could happen.

I am definitely meeting with the BSP chapter next month, which is kind of unusual because many of the other chapters I've been in touch with break for the summer. Don't know if the NPC sorority's alumnae group works on that kind of schedule but I hope to have at least one "fact-finding" meeting with them before the end of the summer. Time commitment and financial considerations will absolutely be taken into account since I am a SAHM to a four-year old!

[susan314]

Originally Posted by Denise_DPhiE

I would suggest doing one at a time. The goals might overlap and you might be spread too thin. Do what your heart tells you! Be sure to ask what the reqs of AI membership in the NPC group are including time, monetary etc.

I would agree that one at a time would be the best way to go - you don't want to shortchange yourself or the organization! For the long term, you could potentially join both BSP and an NPC group. However, its not necessarily something you'd want to do all at once.

I don't think there's anything wrong with meeting women from both organizations at least one time - after all, how can you decide which group "feels right" to you, if you don't meet women from both organizations? Of course, I'd recommend against stringing a group along if you started to feel a strong preference for the other!

[AlphaFrog]

I get the impression (granted, I've never AIed OR joined BSP) that NPC and BSP have different time-tables for doing things. BSP seems to move a lot quicker then most NPC AI processes. So, you might start both processes together, but be fully initiated into BSP before making much headway in AI.

I guess, just check out your options. Go to both, and see where it leads you. Unless an org is pouring all kinds of time and money into you (or asking you to pour all kinds of time and money into it), I don't see the harm in attending events for both, until you would find it impractical to do both. It may just work out perfect to do both, timing wise.

[dukemama]

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

I get the impression (granted, I've never AIed OR joined BSP) that NPC and BSP have different time-tables for doing things. BSP seems to move a lot quicker then most NPC AI processes. So, you might start both processes together, but be fully initiated into BSP before making much headway in AI.

I was thinking the same thing. While there is an actual pledge period in BSP with reading, tests, etc., I have no idea how strictly the individual chapters follow it...or even if they're required to. If the women I met with last week are any guide, BSP pledgeship/initiation doesn't seem overly stressful or time-consuming (they were a very laid-back group who had been together 20+ years). Of course, any BSP sisters out there can feel free to correct me if I'm wrong!!

Thanks for your input. I'll keep the board posted as things progress.

[SWTXBelle]

As the mother of a small child, you may want to consider which group has women in the same boat. One of my alumnae groups actually had a play group - moms with small children met once a week at homes or at the park. If there were a few moms in either of your two groups, you could possibly organize something like that. In my experience with my GLO, the group is very understanding of the demands of having small children. If you cannot devote a great deal of time now, you may be able to later. I was a full-time chapter advisor until the birth of child #1, and took off a few years. Then I moved, and ending up organizing both an Alumnae Panhellenic and a Crescent Circle! I've helped two women (one was my mom!) through AI - and although I can't speak for any other GLO, I'd be surprised if it differed greatly from G Phi B - and it should not take up too much of your time. Follow your heart would be my advice - if you want to do both, I'm sure you can. If you want to put one on hold, that would work, too.
Best of luck!

[dukemama]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

As the mother of a small child, you may want to consider which group has women in the same boat.

That is exactly why one particular BSP chapter has stood out for me so far...all of the others I've talked to are primarily made up of women who already have grandchildren. The "younger" chapter is really the only one I'm interested in joining.

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

In my experience with my GLO, the group is very understanding of the demands of having small children. If you cannot devote a great deal of time now, you may be able to later...although I can't speak for any other GLO, I'd be surprised if it differed greatly from G Phi B - and it should not take up too much of your time.

This is very encouraging. Thanks!!!

[AnchorAlumna]

Good heavens, Beta Sigma Phi is NOT an NPC group, so there should be no conflict. If anything, the NPC group would have fewer demands on you since you are at the alumnae rather than collegiate level. Do both! You can never have too many friends...or sisters!

[cutie_cat_4ever]

Congrats Dukemama I'm so glad to hear you're doing well! I've been off the forums too long because of work but I'm also currently looking into BSP or Epsilon Sigma Alpha. Good luck! And hope to hear more news from you