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  #46  
Old 09-12-2010, 11:52 PM
DeltaBetaBaby DeltaBetaBaby is offline
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Well, we all know what school she is at, and bid day was today, so hopefully it all worked out for her and she'll come back with the rest of the story.

VandalSquirrel, there's no reason to make her feel bad for her observations. She didn't see any non-white women in a chapter. She didn't say they were racist or bad women or anything else, just that they didn't seem diverse. Totally her right to post that, especially when we all sit and beg for stories from PNM's.

Also, I think she is doing a very mature job, up to this point, of considering all of her options. Second invitational is always the WORST round of cuts, and she kept her head up and took another look at a chapter that had not been her favorite earlier on. That's to be commended.
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  #47  
Old 09-12-2010, 11:57 PM
perfectinpurple perfectinpurple is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby View Post
Well, we all know what school she is at, and bid day was today, so hopefully it all worked out for her and she'll come back with the rest of the story.
If it's the school I'm thinking of..... bid day is tomorrow!
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  #48  
Old 09-13-2010, 12:00 AM
lovespink88 lovespink88 is offline
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Originally Posted by perfectinpurple View Post
If it's the school I'm thinking of..... bid day is tomorrow!
This!
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  #49  
Old 09-13-2010, 12:08 AM
VandalSquirrel VandalSquirrel is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby View Post
Well, we all know what school she is at, and bid day was today, so hopefully it all worked out for her and she'll come back with the rest of the story.

VandalSquirrel, there's no reason to make her feel bad for her observations. She didn't see any non-white women in a chapter. She didn't say they were racist or bad women or anything else, just that they didn't seem diverse. Totally her right to post that, especially when we all sit and beg for stories from PNM's.

Also, I think she is doing a very mature job, up to this point, of considering all of her options. Second invitational is always the WORST round of cuts, and she kept her head up and took another look at a chapter that had not been her favorite earlier on. That's to be commended.
If I was trying to make her feel bad, I would have done so, and I could have been insulting and nasty to her. I was mentioning why she may not have seen them, and perhaps to change her definition a bit. If people post to tell women to be open minded about a chapter and they couldn't have met all women who (play the tuba, dress like Thundercats, are goat cheese connoisseurs) they have something in common with, I'm not suggesting anything out of the ordinary that is told to PNMs all the time.

I don't beg for stories from PNMs so don't even try and put it on me when people don't come back and post. If someone doesn't want to know what other people think, they shouldn't put it on the internet.
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  #50  
Old 09-13-2010, 12:55 AM
18andRushing 18andRushing is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VandalSquirrel View Post
If I was trying to make her feel bad, I would have done so, and I could have been insulting and nasty to her. I was mentioning why she may not have seen them, and perhaps to change her definition a bit. If people post to tell women to be open minded about a chapter and they couldn't have met all women who (play the tuba, dress like Thundercats, are goat cheese connoisseurs) they have something in common with, I'm not suggesting anything out of the ordinary that is told to PNMs all the time.

I don't beg for stories from PNMs so don't even try and put it on me when people don't come back and post. If someone doesn't want to know what other people think, they shouldn't put it on the internet.
I actually stopped caring what others think of me a while ago, so I don't really care. It did hurt a little, but I brushed it off. Keep in mind while posting on PNM stories that we are in a very emotional state right now, and the slightest thing can destroy us, make us quit recruitment, or runaway from GC. Consider their feelings a little, especially when we just want to share our stories with others who will appreciate it. This isn't specifically to you, but to everyone, especially the haters. I have read many stories on here and am always mad at the haters. If you don't like the story, read something else. Don't bring down the person's self-esteem or put a negative image in her head when she is sharing such a wonderful time in her life. What good will it bring you to insult someone online? It's called cyber-bullying and people have committed suicide over it. Not that it would get that extreme here hopefully, but my old high school did a whole program about it.
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  #51  
Old 09-13-2010, 02:37 AM
VandalSquirrel VandalSquirrel is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 18andRushing View Post
I actually stopped caring what others think of me a while ago, so I don't really care. It did hurt a little, but I brushed it off. Keep in mind while posting on PNM stories that we are in a very emotional state right now, and the slightest thing can destroy us, make us quit recruitment, or runaway from GC. Consider their feelings a little, especially when we just want to share our stories with others who will appreciate it. This isn't specifically to you, but to everyone, especially the haters. I have read many stories on here and am always mad at the haters. If you don't like the story, read something else. Don't bring down the person's self-esteem or put a negative image in her head when she is sharing such a wonderful time in her life. What good will it bring you to insult someone online? It's called cyber-bullying and people have committed suicide over it. Not that it would get that extreme here hopefully, but my old high school did a whole program about it.
If someone on the internet having an opinion can destroy you, make you quit recruitment, or runaway from GC, I'm impressed. I didn't realize people gave me such power over their lives. If you don't want to have any feedback from haters, stay off the internet. For someone who doesn't care, you seem to have a lot to say on the issue, and maybe you do care, and you're not really over it, if as an anonymous woman I get this kind of reaction, you must have carpal tunnel syndrome from clutching your pearls on the regular. Now that was an insult, get the difference?

Maybe the BSU president is right, I am from an uncivil and nasty culture, but I promise I haven't posted inebriated
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  #52  
Old 09-13-2010, 03:01 AM
ellebud ellebud is offline
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I don't know if some of us can truly understand or remember how vulnerable pnms can be and how it can take some real guts to write their stories. The writer is both a real time reporter and a participant. And she is young. I KNEW that the OP didn't intend to write (for instance) "colored people". I wanted her to clarify quickly and she did. The OP didn't run away.

These threads can become so bland and pc that it is vomitorious. (I LOVED ABC...They were SO cute...as were every other chapter.) It takes guts to write one's heart and head. And words can hurt, witness JuicyCampus and CollegeACB. This year as the Reluctant One was on the "other" side of recruitment I think, from what little she said, she realized how much responsibility she had in making girls feel at home, welcomed and showing them a good time. Perhaps we can show the same restraint and understand that this OP and others struggle in recruitment. And yes, they have opinions just as actives have opinions. It is always "nice" when someone has a "perfect" rush and ends up at a top tier house. We don't fault them for saying that they joined a top house and they "knew" that it would be perfect for them. Why fault someone for saying that their feelings evolved? And, sorry, why jump on someone to say..if you can't stand it...go away?

Last edited by ellebud; 09-13-2010 at 03:08 AM.
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  #53  
Old 09-13-2010, 03:50 AM
christiangirl christiangirl is offline
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Vulnerable, emotional, fearful, anxious? Yes. Made of glass and excused from common conversation? No.

There's a difference between asking for sensitivity and feeding into victimization. VS said nothing wrong, just brought up the observation that whatever chapter is probably more diverse than the OP noted. It was not done insensitively or in an unkind manner so to say she "made the girl feel bad" is ridiculous. The OP is an adult woman in control of her own emotional reactions, no one can make her feel bad. It does a disservice to her to treat her as though that's not true.

Furthermore, pointing out a missed fact does not make someone a hater any more than having a misstep pointed out makes one hated on. What goes on here is a lot of teasing and it can be taken overboard, I'll give that much. But cyberbullying? Can destroy us, make us quit recruitment? IT'S A MESSAGEBOARD. It's not that serious. If it is for that person (not talking about the OP), then yes, I have no problem saying that the log out button's in the top right corner.
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  #54  
Old 09-13-2010, 06:33 AM
Blue Skies Blue Skies is offline
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Originally Posted by ellebud View Post
I don't know if some of us can truly understand or remember how vulnerable pnms can be and how it can take some real guts to write their stories. The writer is both a real time reporter and a participant. And she is young.
This. ^^

No one blinks an eye when a PNM notes that a chapter is full of drop-dead gorgeous beauty pageant types ("But WAIT! I'm SURE the chapter has plain/fat/fugly girls because it's, you know, DIVERSE. They must all have been back in the kitchen, pouring out the ice waters,") or blondes ("But WAIT! Did you examine the roots of their hair? I'm sure there were some brunettes lurking in there somewhere.") Honestly, sometimes a quick scan around the room tells you where you stand in the scheme of things.

I think that the OP has done an exemplary job of keeping an open mind.
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  #55  
Old 09-13-2010, 09:14 AM
canadajen canadajen is offline
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I'm looking forward to reading the rest of your story!
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  #56  
Old 09-13-2010, 11:01 AM
ree-Xi ree-Xi is offline
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Originally Posted by 18andRushing View Post
So today was my first glimpse into sorority life. I started to get ready at 4:40 and left at 5:30 to go to "Building" for my Rush Orientation. I didn't really know what we would do or how long it would take. As I left I saw all these girls really dressed up and I was just in shorts and a t-shirt. As I got outside, I saw a great migration of girls just walking in the same direction. I knew I was going the right way.

None of my friends decided to do Formal Rush this year. One is thinking about Informal or just waiting until next year. It seemed that all the girls were walking in groups. I knew I should have talked to the girls on my floor! I saw them getting ready, but they already made their clique. As I walked a girl asked me if I was going to the rush thing. She was by herself too so we started talking. She is really nice. She is a transfer student. When we got there we were split up by our last names so I didn't think I'd see her again. I walked up the steps thinking these are my first steps to Greek life. I stepped in and saw two rows of girls holding papers of names and numbers. One girl waved me over and I gave her my name. I was in group "#". I started towards the auditorium when a girl handed me a flyer and raffle ticket. They were raffling off a "cool item." I saw a girl who was in a row by herself so I sat down and started talking to her. She wasn't really peppy and didn't seem like she wanted to be there. So I texted. Another girl came and joined us. She was more entertaining than the first, but she kept ending the discussion. Luckily the presentation was starting.

I could tell right away that the Blank store was endorsing a bit of this year’s rush. They played a commercial about cheerleaders for "1 thing" saying "Other thing" was number one. Then two girls gave a presentation about the "Other thing." It was lame. Then they gave out the "cool item." 1-2-2....damn! Oh well, 3 numbers later a girl walks up not looking that excited to get her prize. Next others girls talked about basically nothing. Finally someone interesting came up on the stage.

A lady came up and started talking to us about the whole rush process and what we’d feel and what we had to consider. She stressed the 3 C’s: choice, community, and change. She was a pretty good speaker. She said there were 3 types of people who rush: the prisoners, the vacationers, and the explorers. She said if we got a math problem right the prisoners could leave…1000+1000+20+1000+40+1000+30+1000+10=6000. Wrong. 5100. The prisoners were still stuck. The speech ended.

They called each group out one by one. I got up at # and headed outside. That’s when the rain started! Our group started running to the Subject building, but other groups were running, too. Half of my group got lost, so we were late to the meeting. Another Gamma Chi found us and told us where to go. When we got there, we realized that our group had like 60 girls in it. They went through basically everything. We got a bag full of goodies including a rape whistle flashlight with a built in compass. At the end we even got an umbrella which helped with the rain. We went through the PNM book which was helpful. They made us write a note card with 8 things on it. Then we were told to make 50 more when we got home. I didn’t even have note cards! We got our recruitment numbers and left with people from the same dorms. I got home at like 11. I packed my bag ready for tomorrow’s rush and went to bed!



*Disclaimer* Anything with "---" has been changed to keep my identity a secret.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 18andRushing View Post
I had class for 6 hours today. It was horrible. I also had to go and buy notecards and get my things from my cousin’s place. By the time I got all this I was in my room with only 90 minutes to get ready. My roommate luckily wrote 10 notecards for me. I wrote the last 9. I got ready in my shorts and tee. I packed my bag and started making mac and cheese. As I went to fill it with water, I saw girls leaving! I thought I had time, but I left my food in my room, grabbed my bag and ran. I ate a poptart and fed some to a squirrel when I got there. I was very early and bored. Finally everyone came and out GC’s had their big # signs. It was cool.

Abby: They were singing a cute song. The first girl was really nice, but she seemed a little bored or tired. It was the first house on the second day of Open House. The next girl seemed really chill and sweet. She has a big family, too, and she like the family aspect of a sorority as well. I didn’t have a solid connection, but I really want to go back.

Ashleigh: These girls had a really fun skit, but they had some technological difficulties. One girl was a CivilE major so we talked about that. They really liked how I started my small art business.

Beth: Pretty house. It was 3 PNMs for every 2 members. One member went to “XHS” and was friends with “HS kid,” my MA, who apparently was my friend my junior year, but of course I don’t remember junior year because stuff that doesn’t matter here…I didn’t feel a connection at all. Also, they have a 2 year live-in requirement.

Betsy: These girls were really pretty, like model, picture perfect pretty. I didn’t feel like I fitted in. I looked around and there wasn’t much diversity. Not a single colored person and the girls just talked to me like I was a number and like they were trained, which I'm sure they were because each conversation was the same. They talked about partying and if I had gone to any frats yet. It was weird. Plus, my mouth was filled with perfume.

Brenda: These girls are REALLY nice, sweet, and sincere. We had a tour of the house and the girls were walking backwards everywhere, even on the stairs! We saw the study room and the study files. They said they once had a drunk Nintendo Mario Cart competition. The conversation flowed well and was easy. My person was a GE major which was nice.

Casey: I REALLY liked them. They were so sweet and chill and down to earth. Their dance was amazing with awesome chants, like California Girls (Casey girls). They were so sincere when I was talking to them. I could really see myself here with these girls. I had an amazing time and thought I made some great connections in our conversations.

Franny: They had a really big cheer. The girls I was with all talked about music. I kept trying to change the subject because I didn’t know much about it, but they stuck to it. Every girl loved country music. I like country, but not that much and I don’t know much about it.

Janette: They had a dance as their skit. The house was really interesting and pretty, but really loud. The girl I was talking to and I had a good connection and the conversation flowed well.

Jen K: When we went in it was soooo loud. They were really nice but tired because it was like 10:30 at night on the first day of Open House. The sisterhood events sounded really fun. They were really interesting and I want to go back and learn more.

Jordan: They were really nice and chill. The house was really interesting and energetic when we came in. I really want to go back. It was so crazy and silly. I really felt like I would fit in there. Plus, my person looked exactly like my roommate, but her name was slightly different. And my partner’s person’s name was “Roommate!” It was funny.

Katherine: I really like this house. These girls are really fun and nice. They had a really sweet song. It was really hard to hear, but I think they liked me. The house is gorgeous.

Laura: I really like this houses skit. They had a talent show and a Mean Girls theme. My person told me about the social events they have every week. One was a broad cast major and the other was in sociology. They were lots of fun. The house was pretty and I could see myself there.

Libby: They had a really loud and stomping song. They were very sisterly! I don’t think I want to go back. I didn’t really feel a connection with them. They talked about watches and clothes…

Lizzie: They were really nice, but they were tired. It was the last one of Open House and one girl was losing her voice. They didn’t seem too interested in me, but I’d really like to learn more about them. There were 3 PNMs for 2 members so it was a little awkward.

Mandi: This house was decked out in purple! Their dance was really upbeat. The girl I talked to used to be a ChemE major so we connected on that. She is planning on going to Rome next semester. She was really nice and fun. She told me her favorite parts of the house: the sundeck and randomly going down for food with everybody. After the dance performance she asked if I danced and I told her about the wedding dances I do.

Natalie: I really liked this house. It was funny because we talked about the food and their awesome chef. The girls were all near “Hometown,” so that was cool. They call this house the “building” and it is beautiful. I could imagine myself living there. They had a power point of pictures while singing songs like Sweet Home Natalie.

Rebecca: This house was really nice and pretty. I had good conversations and they had a cute dance about how we were nervous freshman, but I didn’t really feel a connection. I think I’ll give them a second chance.

Robin: This house didn’t have any entertainment which was odd. The house was beautiful though. One girl had a sore throat. The conversation flowed, but not about anything. We were doubled up. The girls were nice, but I didn’t feel anything.

Tegan: I was a bit nervous when I went in. It was loud, but not as loud as I expected. They had a really cute dance/skit. The house was really pretty. There were 2 PNMs with 2 members. I didn’t like my partner because she was acting snobby and wouldn’t let me talk. She kept cutting me off, so I don’t think I made an impression at this house. I made a mental reminder not to stand next to her at other houses, so I wouldn’t be paired with her.


We had to rank our houses after the 3rd day. They say most people only get 3 to 10 houses to go back to, and I was hoping to get at least 5. 13 is rare. We leave again. When I get back to my dorm all the girls are trying on dresses for 1st invite and deciding on outfits for the 2nd and 3rd. I join in and finally meet people on my floor. It’s pretty cool.
My List:
• Casey
• Rebecca
• Ashleigh
• Laura
• Jordan
• Jen K
• Brenda
• Abby
• Mandi
• Lizzie
• Katherine
• Janette
• Natalie
1. Tegan
2. Franny
3. Libby
4. Robin
5. Betsy
6. Beth


*Disclaimer* These houses are in no special order. I forgot what order I went to them. Also, no more until tomorrow because I just gave you 3 days worth. 1st Invite will be given in the morning. 2nd at night. 3rd Monday morning. Bid Day Monday night-but very late most likely!!!! I can't wait! 2 days!
Quote:
Originally Posted by 18andRushing View Post
One of my friend’s friends slept over the night before to get ready. I kept waking her up, but she didn’t get up until 8:20. We had to leave at 9:00. She did her make-up and didn’t finish until 8:55, so I had to help her get ready. And she left the room a mess, so I had to clean it before I left. I wore mascara for the first time that day, (without someone else putting it on for me) and I looked great! Another girl in my hall gave me a dress to wear. It was really cute. I forgot to take a picture, though. We got there late, and the Gamma Chi’s called me as I was running up to Noyes. They handed out our lists after reminding us most people don’t get 13. They also said that if we have a break at the end of the day we could pref early. I only noted that room rather than the regular pref room because I wouldn’t have to go at the regular time. I got my list back and started walking away. I counted…1…2……..12…13? WTF?!? How in the what? 13? Why? I sucked at Open House! Then I looked when I had my beloved Cassie……………nowhere……and I am going back to Beth and Robin. 2 I hated. I also didn’t get back to Brenda. I was a little sad, but I tried to brush it off. Off I went.

Jen K: They had an awesome Toy Story 3 skit. It was so fun and energetic. They have really low dues. We talked about our “college” embarrassing stories. We were laughing and having so much fun! Afterwards I heard they are on probation and don’t have a football block and “dance” for this semester, but they still have exchanges. But I really like them! I have there song still stuck in my head.

Robin: This round was okay. Again, there wasn’t a good conversation. They had a LeBron James skit. I didn’t get most of it.

Lizzie: I really like this house. They had a really cute “thing” skit where a bunch of characters were finding the XY treasure, which happened to be friendship on a “symbol.” The girls seem very sisterly. I ended up talking with one of the girls I spoke with at Open House.

Abby: I really like their “symbol” song. Again, I really like this house. They say they have low affordable dues.

Janette: I had a lot of fun here. We talked about food and majors and creepers. There wasn’t a skit, but they sang.

Rebecca: This time was ok…The girls seem nice, but I didn’t feel anything. I don’t really want to go back.

We had a lunch hour. So I went to Subway with a bunch of girls. We got there early so there wasn’t a line. We ate and headed out again. I sat at my next house illegally texting and looking at my schedule and ranking the ones I’ve gone to. In the afternoon I had to make 3 runs across campus! Oy…

Katherine: This house was okay this round. They are still pretty good though. I didn’t get a connection with the girl I talked to, but the others seemed nice.

Ashleigh: This house was nice again. They had a GLEE theme. I didn’t really feel a connection with these girls. We talked about t.v. and movies and we could tell the topic was getting boring.

Mandi: I didn’t really like it this round. Apparently this is a “blank” house. We watched a slideshow video.

Natalie: I really like it. They had a t.v. skit. It was really funny and stereotypical. I was really hot because I just ran across campus.

Laura: They had a Wizard of Oz theme. It was an okay time. I didn’t love it, I didn’t hate it. I am going to give it a second chance if I can.

Beth: I had to run to this house, but I was already exhausted. I was a couple minutes late with another girl. We snuck in in the back. Again, I didn’t feel any connection. I was really bored because it was 3 PNM’s for 2 girls again and I was the odd one out.

Jordan: I really liked their skit. There was a girl thinking about whom to pref. And she was thinking about the houses. Debby Downer, Kloe Kardashian, and Buddy Elf were in it. We talked about clubs in high school and clubs we want to join in college. I learned about the October Lover’s Club.

We had to rank them again. This is how I went:

• Jen K
• Lizzie
• Abby
• Janette
• Natalie
• Laura
• Jordan
1. Katherine
2. Ashleigh
3. Mandi
4. Rebecca
5. Robin
6. Beth


We got financial sheets today and after looking at them I got really upset. A lot of my favorite ones are really expensive, and "sorority" wasn’t. Numbers are New Member (Fall/Spring (if applicable, otherwise live out)), Live in total per semester (F/S), Live out total per semester (F/S). *estimated to keep discreet*
• Jen K: 650, 430, 300 Affordable
• Lizzie: 1000, 4000, 750 NOT
• Abby: 1700, 5000, 1900/0 NOT!!!
• Janette: 900, 4300, 550 Affordable?
• Natalie: 900, 3700, 500 Kinda…Evens Out
• Laura: 800, 4200, 550 Kinda…Evens Out
• Jordan: 900, 4800, 650 NOT


The thing is I actually really like Jordan, Abby, and Lizzie. I like Jen K and am iffy about the others, so I’ll have to see where it goes. But Abby is GONE, sadly. I don’t know what to do. I feel icky about this. I can’t think of a better word. I just don’t know what I’ll do if I don’t get back to any affordable ones. Remember, I’m paying for this myself!
Quote:
Originally Posted by 18andRushing View Post
I am a failure. A total failure. I got cut from over 2/3 of my houses. I got 3 of my bottom and 1 of my low ranks.

I was so ready this morning and so excited. I got all packed and ate breakfast. I walked up calmly to get my schedule. I had 13 houses before, I have to get at least one of my favorites, and I will probably be screwed with another full schedule. I walk up to my Gamma Chi and give her a smile before grabbing my list. When is my lunch break going to be? Hopefully in the middle…house…break dam….house...BREAK??…BREAK!!!...house…ANOTHER BREAK?!?!?!?!?....house! ONLY 4 HOUSES?!?
WHAT THE HELL?? What did I do wrong? Why didn’t they like me? Hold on…they are probably ones I like….Natalie-that was fine I guess…Rebecca? Why do they like me so much?...Crap…Beth again… Ashleigh…fine I guess. But none of my 4. No Jen K? No Lizzie? No Jordan? No Abby? Why?!? SHUT UP. Be positive. I am being optimistic about this. This is good…this will be fine…I can do this. I walk. And walk. I talk to other girls. They are like me. We suck. We check the time. Crap! We run and run.

My Schedule

Natalie: I was really upset before going to this chapter and I wasn’t in the “rush” mood. I got in and was in a daze. I really like them, but I don’t know if I can see myself there. We make journals as our philanthropy craft.

Break: I tried to keep calm. I really did. My hair was messing up. I felt waterworks coming so I ran to a bathroom to dry up the tears before they fell. I had to talk to someone. I called Jig. She helped me calm down and get ready to quit.

Rebecca: This house was better than usual. I had a girl I already met before. It was kind of awkward. We made pillows for this craft. It was really cute, but mine was lumpy and disformed.

Double Break: I checked my phone and saw my friend wanted to get lunch. I went back home to eat. She helped me out. I went to my room and fixed my hair. My roommates were going to go eat lunch so I left with them.

Beth: I really did not want to go back. But I’m glad I did. I talked to some really nice girls and we clicked. We colored an "animal" and glued it to a paper bag. That’s it.

Break: I called my roommates to see where they were. They were going to the lib so I met them up. I left a while later.

Ashleigh: I LOVE this house. I had such a connection with each girl I talked to. First we went inside and sat at a table and made "objects." This girl was in awe by my artistic skill of my summer "job." Then I was curling ribbon with my nail and she thought it was cool. Then she noticed my nails and again was in awe. We then went to watch a video clip. Apparently it was from the movie “Movie,” which apparently I have never seen. I talked about my grandparents. I almost cried about missing my grandma. Then we went upstairs with someone else. The house is so pretty. We talked 3 on 3. It was pretty nice. I ended up sitting next to my roommate’s friend from "town." My person and I connected over math. She had "teacher," too. She got a B+. She told me he looked like "person" from the Simpsons. I was so excited because I couldn’t figure out who he reminded me of. I felt a good accomplishment. Yup! I really liked it and I really want to go back to just this house. Dues: 750, 4300, 360. Pretty good….

I ended up ranking Ashleigh, Rebecca, Natalie, and Beth. Fingers crossed for tomorrow! Wish me luck!

Quote:
Originally Posted by 18andRushing View Post
Today, 12:55 AM
I actually stopped caring what others think of me a while ago, so I don't really care. It did hurt a little, but I brushed it off. Keep in mind while posting on PNM stories that we are in a very emotional state right now, and the slightest thing can destroy us, make us quit recruitment, or runaway from GC. Consider their feelings a little, especially when we just want to share our stories with others who will appreciate it. This isn't specifically to you, but to everyone, especially the haters. I have read many stories on here and am always mad at the haters. If you don't like the story, read something else. Don't bring down the person's self-esteem or put a negative image in her head when she is sharing such a wonderful time in her life. What good will it bring you to insult someone online? It's called cyber-bullying and people have committed suicide over it. Not that it would get that extreme here hopefully, but my old high school did a whole program about it.
Is this live now?
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  #57  
Old 09-13-2010, 11:28 AM
18andRushing 18andRushing is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 23
Talking Day 6: 3rd Invite

I was so nervous as I walked to my meeting spot. I just had to get Ashleigh. If I don’t, I don’t know what I’ll do. Think positive! But, if I only go back to Beth, I’m going to drop most likely. I didn’t click with them really. I get there and sit down on the steps, after saying hi to my Gamma Chi’s. I started talking to some girls. Finally it was time to get our schedules! I grab it, search and search. Something…something….something….ASHLEIGH! Yes! Then I looked at my schedule for real. Beth…Break…Break…Ashleigh. It was a lame schedule with a 3 hour break, but still good. I headed out.

Beth: When I got in, I was greeted by someone who went to my HS. I didn’t really know her, but she acted like she knew me, which felt really weird. We talked a little bit, then others joined us. I talked to the other girls, too. We went upstairs and got flowers and sat through a ceremony. I was a little upset at the other PNM’s who slouched in their chairs, arms crossed, glaring at the ground, with a very annoyed/mad face. At least pretend you are having a good time. I could tell these girls put a lot of work into recruitment, and their hard work wasn’t being appreciated. I left, but with no real connection at all. I don’t think I’ll even put them on my Bid Card.

Break: I went home and did some homework. 3 hours is a long time. I got re-ready and headed out for the amazing Ashleigh!

Ashleigh: I got there a little early, so I sat and talked with my Gamma Chi’s, who happened to be at that house. Once people started arriving I noticed a bunch of my friends there. Would these be my sisters? A warm feeling fell upon me. We headed for the line, and waited to be announced into the beautiful home. As I walked to the door, the President touched my arm and kindly asked my last name. I hadn’t put it on there, and she felt bad about having to ask once again. But we laughed. I stepped forward with my name and looked around at the smiling faces. No one was moving, but then from out of the back, someone walked towards me. I knew this girl, but I didn’t know she was in this chapter. A huge grin stretched across my face when I saw her and she returned the smile. We walked to a dining room chatting. I couldn’t believe this. She chose me to talk to! I know it wasn’t that big of a coincidence, but that I ended up here, with my mentor, was just amazing. We talked and talked. It was amazing. Then we headed upstairs to a room. The house was beautiful and I could really imagine myself living here. We kept talking and with the other girls in the room this time. It was so nice. Afterwards we headed downstairs for a ceremony. The girls sang and told stories. It was really meaningful. As we headed out, she was really sincere. She said she hoped to see me tomorrow, but if not we’d see each other in class. She said stuff about preferencing is a hard process and where I ended up would be the right place. I absolutely knew I wanted to be here, that I would suicide this house. I left the house knowing I would be back in just 24 short hours.

Preferencing was of course easy. I walked with my Gamma Chi’s to the room. We got our sheets, explanations, and rules. I filled out my Bid card, signed my name, and got in line. I left for the lab, filled out the one house, and got ready to hit submit. I was ready.

As I left I was happy, like everything was right. I headed for dinner, still in my homecoming dress. I no longer felt odd in the dress, but accepted and natural. I was me, and I found my home hopefully. I jumped with glee with my friends after telling them my story. They were happy for me, even though they did not rush. I can’t wait. I could not concentrate on my homework all night, just hoping I would not get that dreadful call. I am not sure if this school does that, I forgot to ask, but I did have to write my phone number down. The seconds are ticking until the amazing Day.

Last edited by 18andRushing; 09-13-2010 at 11:31 AM. Reason: Color
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  #58  
Old 09-13-2010, 11:35 AM
33girl 33girl is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Hotel Oceanview
Posts: 34,489
Quote:
Originally Posted by 18andRushing View Post
I actually stopped caring what others think of me a while ago, so I don't really care. It did hurt a little, but I brushed it off. Keep in mind while posting on PNM stories that we are in a very emotional state right now, and the slightest thing can destroy us, make us quit recruitment, or runaway from GC. Consider their feelings a little, especially when we just want to share our stories with others who will appreciate it. This isn't specifically to you, but to everyone, especially the haters. I have read many stories on here and am always mad at the haters. If you don't like the story, read something else. Don't bring down the person's self-esteem or put a negative image in her head when she is sharing such a wonderful time in her life. What good will it bring you to insult someone online? It's called cyber-bullying and people have committed suicide over it. Not that it would get that extreme here hopefully, but my old high school did a whole program about it.
No one is cyber bullying or insulting you. She just pointed out that you may have not met all the women at that chapter and/or that diversity doesn't mean the room has to look like Diff'rent Strokes meets The World of Suzie Wong.
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  #59  
Old 09-13-2010, 11:40 AM
ree-Xi ree-Xi is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: State of Imagination
Posts: 3,400
Quote:
Originally Posted by 18andRushing View Post
I was so nervous as I walked to my meeting spot. I just had to get Ashleigh. If I don’t, I don’t know what I’ll do. Think positive! But, if I only go back to Beth, I’m going to drop most likely. I didn’t click with them really. I get there and sit down on the steps, after saying hi to my Gamma Chi’s. I started talking to some girls. Finally it was time to get our schedules! I grab it, search and search. Something…something….something….ASHLEIGH! Yes! Then I looked at my schedule for real. Beth…Break…Break…Ashleigh. It was a lame schedule with a 3 hour break, but still good. I headed out.

Beth: When I got in, I was greeted by someone who went to my HS. I didn’t really know her, but she acted like she knew me, which felt really weird. We talked a little bit, then others joined us. I talked to the other girls, too. We went upstairs and got flowers and sat through a ceremony. I was a little upset at the other PNM’s who slouched in their chairs, arms crossed, glaring at the ground, with a very annoyed/mad face. At least pretend you are having a good time. I could tell these girls put a lot of work into recruitment, and their hard work wasn’t being appreciated. I left, but with no real connection at all. I don’t think I’ll even put them on my Bid Card.

Break: I went home and did some homework. 3 hours is a long time. I got re-ready and headed out for the amazing Ashleigh!

Ashleigh: I got there a little early, so I sat and talked with my Gamma Chi’s, who happened to be at that house. Once people started arriving I noticed a bunch of my friends there. Would these be my sisters? A warm feeling fell upon me. We headed for the line, and waited to be announced into the beautiful home. As I walked to the door, the President touched my arm and kindly asked my last name. I hadn’t put it on there, and she felt bad about having to ask once again. But we laughed. I stepped forward with my name and looked around at the smiling faces. No one was moving, but then from out of the back, someone walked towards me. I knew this girl, but I didn’t know she was in this chapter. A huge grin stretched across my face when I saw her and she returned the smile. We walked to a dining room chatting. I couldn’t believe this. She chose me to talk to! I know it wasn’t that big of a coincidence, but that I ended up here, with my mentor, was just amazing. We talked and talked. It was amazing. Then we headed upstairs to a room. The house was beautiful and I could really imagine myself living here. We kept talking and with the other girls in the room this time. It was so nice. Afterwards we headed downstairs for a ceremony. The girls sang and told stories. It was really meaningful. As we headed out, she was really sincere. She said she hoped to see me tomorrow, but if not we’d see each other in class. She said stuff about preferencing is a hard process and where I ended up would be the right place. I absolutely knew I wanted to be here, that I would suicide this house. I left the house knowing I would be back in just 24 short hours.

Preferencing was of course easy. I walked with my Gamma Chi’s to the room. We got our sheets, explanations, and rules. I filled out my Bid card, signed my name, and got in line. I left for the lab, filled out the one house, and got ready to hit submit. I was ready.

As I left I was happy, like everything was right. I headed for dinner, still in my homecoming dress. I no longer felt odd in the dress, but accepted and natural. I was me, and I found my home hopefully. I jumped with glee with my friends after telling them my story. They were happy for me, even though they did not rush. I can’t wait. I could not concentrate on my homework all night, just hoping I would not get that dreadful call. I am not sure if this school does that, I forgot to ask, but I did have to write my phone number down. The seconds are ticking until the amazing Day.
It's tough going to class and having to have a full day when you're waiting to find out where/if you received a bid.
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  #60  
Old 09-13-2010, 12:08 PM
ellebud ellebud is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: so cal
Posts: 910
Quote:
Originally Posted by christiangirl View Post
Vulnerable, emotional, fearful, anxious? Yes. Made of glass and excused from common conversation? No.

There's a difference between asking for sensitivity and feeding into victimization. VS said nothing wrong, just brought up the observation that whatever chapter is probably more diverse than the OP noted. It was not done insensitively or in an unkind manner so to say she "made the girl feel bad" is ridiculous. The OP is an adult woman in control of her own emotional reactions, no one can make her feel bad. It does a disservice to her to treat her as though that's not true.

Furthermore, pointing out a missed fact does not make someone a hater any more than having a misstep pointed out makes one hated on. What goes on here is a lot of teasing and it can be taken overboard, I'll give that much. But cyberbullying? Can destroy us, make us quit recruitment? IT'S A MESSAGEBOARD. It's not that serious. If it is for that person (not talking about the OP), then yes, I have no problem saying that the log out button's in the top right corner.
I don't believe that the OP was feeling "victimized". She was simply stating what she saw. This could have been the room she was in, the blur that is recruitment, or a lack of diversity. And that is what it is, her observations. Just as everyone does on their threads.

As far as this messageboard I find that most people are, most of the time, kind, sometimes terse (with good reason: How many times can the same question be asked when the answer is right in front of them? AAARGh to quote Charlie Brown), often very funny and intelligent.

As far as cyberbullying, a phrase that wasn't said or implied in my comment, if you read newpapers and/or watch the news, it can in fact be devastating. I hope that you aren't insinuating that, if a poster has a different viewpoint and/or asks for empathy for someone, that they should leave because they aren't part of your mindset/party: perhaps you might want to reconsider that idea.
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