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  #1  
Old 09-03-2015, 06:01 PM
msmay msmay is offline
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Deactivated

I wish to discontinue this thread.

Last edited by msmay; 10-01-2015 at 02:50 PM.
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  #2  
Old 09-03-2015, 07:15 PM
Cheerio Cheerio is offline
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Originally Posted by msmay View Post
Hi,

Has anyone else on here ever been deactivated from a sorority or fraternity? Just wondering if anyone had a similar story.
What's your story?
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  #3  
Old 09-03-2015, 09:41 PM
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thetalady thetalady is offline
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Do you mean had your membership terminated or had your "pin pulled"? Probably not going to find anyone in that situation here.
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  #4  
Old 09-17-2015, 02:20 PM
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thetalady thetalady is offline
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Originally Posted by msmay View Post
Hello,

I was in a social sorority back in my undergraduate days (some twenty-some years ago), but it was not for me. Frankly, I was surprised by the pettiness, and do not wish to repeat such an experience today because I've discovered what I truly want is an authentic, multicultural sorority that is much more than a social undergraduate thing based on partying and fraternities, but an organization that connects women who seek social justice.

msmay
Am I missing your point? I don't understand how your reply addresses the topic. ..
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  #5  
Old 09-17-2015, 02:22 PM
DeltaBetaBaby DeltaBetaBaby is offline
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She wants to be free to join another group although she was initiated into her first one.
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  #6  
Old 09-17-2015, 02:33 PM
carnation carnation is offline
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msmay, when you pmed me asking about someone who could help you with becoming a PNAM, I thought you wanted information about NPCs. The member I referred you to is in an NPC group and probably can't help you with any of the others. The track to that is different.
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  #7  
Old 09-17-2015, 03:04 PM
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AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Originally Posted by thetalady View Post
Am I missing your point? I don't understand how your reply addresses the topic. ..
She is not going to address any further questions about her undergrad experience. There's been some editing and deleting, and that subject is finished. Trust me on this.

She's seeking info on membership in a NON-NPC group now. That is a whole different area and not something with which I can offer any help. msmay, perhaps you can contact the headquarters of the group(s) you are interested in, and they will be able to help you.
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  #8  
Old 09-17-2015, 06:08 PM
msmay msmay is offline
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Originally Posted by AZTheta View Post
She is not going to address any further questions about her undergrad experience. There's been some editing and deleting, and that subject is finished. Trust me on this.

She's seeking info on membership in a NON-NPC group now. That is a whole different area and not something with which I can offer any help. msmay, perhaps you can contact the headquarters of the group(s) you are interested in, and they will be able to help you.
Thank you, AZTheta! I so appreciate your help.
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  #9  
Old 10-01-2015, 05:01 PM
msmay msmay is offline
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To clarify matters for all, I was deactivated from a sorority due to my own poor choices and I'm deeply sorry about my behavior. I've been seeking reinstatement for over twenty years because I want to share who I am today, not the girl I once was. I was socially inept in college and self-medicated to deal with the extreme social anxiety. Of course, this is only my side of the story. Greek life in this house obviously was not the right choice for me, especially the partying, social part; regardless, I still long for forgiveness from my former sisters and seek fellowship in a GLO now that I'm mature enough to appreciate it, but that ship has sailed.

Last edited by msmay; 10-01-2015 at 07:13 PM.
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  #10  
Old 10-01-2015, 09:49 PM
33girl 33girl is offline
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Have you reached out to your chapter sisters on Facebook and attempted to tell them what you just told us? Even if you cannot be formally reinstated into the national organization, you might be able to mend fences with the women you knew in college. You never know until you try.
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  #11  
Old 10-02-2015, 08:58 AM
msmay msmay is offline
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Yes, I did exactly that and a handful of them helped me appeal, but I was still denied by the sorority national office. I remain friends with a couple of them and it's been a healing experience and blessing to have them in my life. As mentioned, I deeply regret my choices as an undergraduate (I wish I could write my story so young women would know what NOT to do) and still have post traumatic stress disorder from the whole experience, which has manifested itself in twenty-some years of nightmares and a strong sense of guilt. My ultimate dream is to be reinstated, even if I'm a little old lady by then; with irony and deep sadness I must say that I (much belatedly) love and respect my sorority ideals now that I'm an adult, even though I did not do so when I was a girl and this experience will be with me for the rest of my days.

Last edited by msmay; 10-02-2015 at 09:14 AM.
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  #12  
Old 10-02-2015, 10:43 AM
33girl 33girl is offline
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You have forgiveness from your chapter sisters, who were the ones who you directly wronged or brought complication into their lives. In my opinion, that is a WAY bigger deal than being nationally reinstated. It may be that this is just something that in your org there is no wavering from and it's not personal.

The most freeing thing on earth is to simply say "I was wrong" and move on. I hope you can find peace and enjoy the renewed fellowship you've found.
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  #13  
Old 10-02-2015, 12:13 PM
LIXO LIXO is offline
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^^^^^ This

So even though you are not a current member, it sounds like the sorority and it's ideals had a positive influence in your life. Consider yourself blessed and focus on the future.
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  #14  
Old 10-24-2017, 07:27 PM
msmay msmay is offline
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Despite everything that happened, I do think that my sorority really helped me in terms of study skills and organization, in particular. I appreciated so many of the traditions, but I just don't think this particular house was a good fit for me. It was a great house for those who did feel comfortable there, but I don't think it was right for me. Obviously, I was deactivated. My advice to anyone considering Greek Rush would be to take this whole process VERY seriously and search your heart about which house would be the best for you, not what other people want, what others have suggested, what the "best house" is, etc.
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  #15  
Old 10-24-2017, 07:51 PM
Sororitysock Sororitysock is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by msmay View Post
Despite everything that happened, I do think that my sorority really helped me in terms of study skills and organization, in particular. I appreciated so many of the traditions, but I just don't think this particular house was a good fit for me. It was a great house for those who did feel comfortable there, but I don't think it was right for me. Obviously, I was deactivated. My advice to anyone considering Greek Rush would be to take this whole process VERY seriously and search your heart about which house would be the best for you, not what other people want, what others have suggested, what the "best house" is, etc.
You don't seem to be able to let this go. Have you tried talking to a professional?
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