changing your name?

[valkyrie]

I started wondering about this while reading the "wedding dates" thread. If you are a woman and you are married, did you change your last name or not? If you're not married, what do you think about the whole name changing issue? Guys, what do you think about it?

[KillarneyRose]

I took my husband's last name when we married. If I had been planning to stay in the same city and continue to work there in my field, I would have considered keeping my maiden name because that is the name by which my corporate and media contacts knew me. But I've always been fairly traditional regarding marriage rules and have always wanted to take my husband's name.

Plus, I've moved up the alphabet from a "Y" to an "A" which I rather like!

[TechAPhi]

When I married, I kept my last name. I did so mainly because I was a reporter at the time and all of my clips and contacts knew me by my maiden name.

It's been six years and I have not changed my name. To those considering not changing--it has caused me innumerable headaches over the years. Society really doesn't embrace this choice and, I've found, some people actually seem to get very upset when they learn I kept my maiden name (especially here in Georgia), though I have a hard time understanding why they care so much.

Jen

[aggieAXO]

If I like his last name I will change it, if not then I will keep my own-shallow I know but that is the way I want it

Many of the women I work with keep their maiden names-very acceptable here.

My mother divorced my father 15 years ago and still keeps his name-just easier than having to change all the impt. documents I guess.

Sometimes I think I would not change my name at all-too traditional and I am all about not being traditional.

[amycat412]

I was married very briefly a few years ago and kept my name--mostly because 1. we were married so briefly I hadn't had time to decide how I felt about it and 2. My last name is so much better.

When/If I marry again, I will keep my own last name. I am a writer and it doesn't make sense to me to change it when for the past 10 years of my career I've been known as Me.

[Shelacious]

Well, legally I will probably keep my current name and add his. For business purposes, I will probably use my maiden name. For personal, I'll use my maiden and husband's name (like Hillary RODHAM CLINTON instead of Hillary Clinton). My boyfriend seems agreeable as long as I'm willing to use his name somewhere in my configuration (to use my maiden and his name makes our initials similar which he seems to think is rather cute.

Like IowaHawkeye, I plan on doing the hyphenated thing.

[LexiKD]

It would all depend.

My last name is really hard to fit well with another and Lexi doesn't sound great with just anything. I am Greek and feel that Greek names sound better with other Greek names, doesn't make it easy...never dated a Greek guy so I will most likly keep it. Unless it's Mrs. Brad Pitt or something similar...

[AngelPhiSig]

For me it depends on the guys last name, I really want to carry on my last name... and especially if my husbands name is a Y, S or Z.... Then my initials will be:

ARMY
ARMS
ARMZ

It would just be fun to initial something!

[SigkapAlumWSU]

Haha.. ok, here's my situation. When my parent's got married, they had already been maried before, but obviosly, my dad had kept his name, Bennett. I don't know if my mom ever changed hers, but when she met my dad, she had her maiden name, Cumming. Neither wanted to lose the name, so the hyphenated it, Bennett-Cumming.
Now here is me, engaged. I decided a long time ago that unless his name was longer than mine, or I hated it, I would just take his. And I love it and it's much shorter. Besides, could you really see Bennett-Cumming McFarland?( maiden, last) I mean, what kind of a middle name is that?? or wose yet, hyphenating it all!! No way! I have a lil brother.. he can carry on the name!

[DeltAlum]

When we were married years ago, we talked about hyphenating both names -- but never got around to it, so my wife took my last name.

It really didn't make much difference to me.

Our oldest daughter is divorced and re-married. She took her first husbands last name. She also does a lot of acting and singing professionally. When she got divorced, everyone knew her with her ex's name.

I suggested she change it back to her maiden name -- which she did.

Then when she got married again, I suggested she keep her maiden name -- at least professionally.

Well, she took her new husbands last name. Go figure. At least he's an actor also, so the name is recognized.

Of course, the other thing to consider is the legal hassles of changing names when you are divorced. It's amazing how many things have your name on them. And, if you change back, you have to change them all. To me, that's another valid reason to keep your maiden name if you are so inclined.

[Siobhan]

Unless my future's husband has some totally whacked last name, I plan on changing mine.

[AOIIAngel]

I would change my last name, just because to me it is the traditional thing, and I am all about tradition!! Also, if/when my sweetie and I get married, I will go from a W up to a C!! I have always wanted to be at the top!!!

[aopirose]

I am the last of my line so keeping my maiden name was important for a lot of reasons. When hubby and I were engaged, he was all about changing his name or hyphenation. He actually changed his mind right before the wedding. Turns out he was really attached to his name.

I use a hyphen professionally and it can be a tongue twister. I am Mrs. Him socially. I have a Russian but really common first name; yet, people can't pronounce it if they read it off a page. I always felt saved because my maiden name is English. People had no problem with it so at least they got half my name right. I was hesitant to switch to my husband's last name, which I just love, but it is French. People can't pronounce it either if they read it off a page.

I also can’t tell you how disappointed I was to learn about names and marriage laws. For years, I always thought that my name change, or not, was my choice and that I wielded some kind of power. However, in Louisiana, a woman's name automatically (legally) changes to her husband's unless she signs formal papers to the contrary. I didn't know that until we bought a house 3 years ago and was going over the contract with the attorneys.

My son has my maiden name for his middle name, so the name does carry for another generation.

[aephi alum]

When I got married, I tacked my husband's name onto the end of my own - so officially I have two middle names - my original middle name and my maiden name. In legal documents, I have two middle initials. When I can only provide one (like on my driver's license) I use the initial of my original middle name.

I prefer to be addressed in correspondence as Ms. Hisname. I don't particularly like being called Mrs. Hisname (because Mrs. means "wife of" implying I have no identity of my own), but I've kind of gotten resigned to it What really irks me, is when people use "Mrs. Hisfirstname Hislastname" - hello?? I have a name of my own!! I usually hand any mail addressed like that to my husband - "it's got your name and not mine on it, so it must be for you"