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  #181  
Old 01-16-2018, 09:55 AM
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AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PNMmom18 View Post
I truly understand that nothing was promised or assumed from being a legacy. I do not believe in the everybody gets a trophy approach and the process is equally brutal for everyone. I was just simply sharing my families experience. My older daughter graduated 2 yrs ago from IU. She got cut from a house she loved right before preference. I wasn’t looking for anyone to fix the situation. I was just venting in an arena I felt could understand. Thank you to all the ones who sent kind messages and encouragement, I wish all your girls the best moving forward.
PNMmom, we get it. We really do. My own remarks were intended to give useful information regarding the general topic of legacies and invites for all PNMs for those who aren't in NPC sororities or who haven't been involved since college (and boy have things changed since I went through rush, when God was a baby). I don't see that anyone was trying to fix, or give trophies. I don't see that you were whining or even venting. What I saw was this:

When you have children, a piece of your heart goes walking around outside your body for the rest of your life. So it goes that you're (we're all actually) hurting for your (our) children. My Buddhist practice emphasizes compassion and loving kindness and mindfulness. It also places suffering smack dab in the forefront of my life experience. I'd like to skip the suffering. Unfortunately, not an option.

Hoping that your daughter finds a home and a lifetime of membership joys. Hoping that for everyone.

And again, it's Indiana. Glacial pace - but moving. I'll take it. The Grand Canyon took a long time, too.
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  #182  
Old 01-16-2018, 10:15 AM
IowaPiPhi IowaPiPhi is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChioLu View Post
THIS!

When my goddaughter, daughter of my Chi O big sis, did not join XO or her grandmother’s legacy chapter of Kappa, but joined Theta, this gives her younger sister of being a legacy to 3 groups. I’ve given her younger sister the nickname of “triple threat”.
Lucky girl! Great way to think about it.
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  #183  
Old 01-16-2018, 11:24 AM
GLE23 GLE23 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AZTheta View Post
PNMmom, we get it. We really do. My own remarks were intended to give useful information regarding the general topic of legacies and invites for all PNMs for those who aren't in NPC sororities or who haven't been involved since college (and boy have things changed since I went through rush, when God was a baby). I don't see that anyone was trying to fix, or give trophies. I don't see that you were whining or even venting. What I saw was this:

When you have children, a piece of your heart goes walking around outside your body for the rest of your life. So it goes that you're (we're all actually) hurting for your (our) children. My Buddhist practice emphasizes compassion and loving kindness and mindfulness. It also places suffering smack dab in the forefront of my life experience. I'd like to skip the suffering. Unfortunately, not an option.

Hoping that your daughter finds a home and a lifetime of membership joys. Hoping that for everyone.

And again, it's Indiana. Glacial pace - but moving. I'll take it. The Grand Canyon took a long time, too.
So true about hurting and wanting for our children. All my emotions since January 3 have been because I feel so deeply for my daughter and want so badly for her what she wants for herself. That's because I'm her Mom. And, I cannot just give her a big hug. On pins and needles today because she's on pins and needles. Good luck to all our daughters, and sending virtual hugs t all the moms.
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  #184  
Old 01-16-2018, 12:05 PM
lyrespearls lyrespearls is offline
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[When you have children, a piece of your heart goes walking around outside your body for the rest of your life. So it goes that you're (we're all actually) hurting for your (our) children.
And again, it's Indiana. Glacial pace - but moving. I'll take it. The Grand Canyon took a long time, too.[/QUOTE]

You captured this beautifully and the glacial pace/Grand Canyon analogy brought a giggle for sure!
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  #185  
Old 01-16-2018, 12:12 PM
GreekOne GreekOne is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lyrespearls View Post
[When you have children, a piece of your heart goes walking around outside your body for the rest of your life. So it goes that you're (we're all actually) hurting for your (our) children.
And again, it's Indiana. Glacial pace - but moving. I'll take it. The Grand Canyon took a long time, too.
You captured this beautifully and the glacial pace/Grand Canyon analogy brought a giggle for sure![/QUOTE]

"So true about hurting and wanting for our children. All my emotions since January 3 have been because I feel so deeply for my daughter and want so badly for her what she wants for herself. That's because I'm her Mom. And, I cannot just give her a big hug. On pins and needles today because she's on pins and needles. Good luck to all our daughters, and sending virtual hugs t all the moms."

Yes to all of this for sure! Pins and needles here.
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  #186  
Old 01-16-2018, 12:36 PM
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Refletion: when I opened my bid card, my heart leapt. Truth: there was also a twinge of sadness, a thought of "what if" about the other chapter I preffed but listed second. They wanted me, I wanted them. I couldn't have both. It wasn't that I wanted Theta more. It was just the decision I made that night, the way it worked out.

So hopeful to hear about new members in Indiana chapters, no matter what letters!
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  #187  
Old 01-16-2018, 12:46 PM
TriDeltaSallie TriDeltaSallie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AZTheta View Post
Refletion: when I opened my bid card, my heart leapt. Truth: there was also a twinge of sadness, a thought of "what if" about the other chapter I preffed but listed second. They wanted me, I wanted them. I couldn't have both. It wasn't that I wanted Theta more. It was just the decision I made that night, the way it worked out.

So hopeful to hear about new members in Indiana chapters, no matter what letters!
I think no matter how happy we are with where we ended up, there is always a bit of the "what if" that lingers. I went through informal and wonder "what if" I had gone through formal. In the end, like so much of life sorority membership is about embracing the choice you made and making the very most of it.
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  #188  
Old 01-16-2018, 12:50 PM
IUmom20n21 IUmom20n21 is offline
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Hi all. New here, but have been lurking for a few days.

I have both a son and daughter at IU. My son is in a fraternity and my daughter is currently a nervous wreck, waiting for tonight.

I read on another site that calls to girls who didn't get a bid have started. Best of luck to all!
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  #189  
Old 01-16-2018, 12:52 PM
BBH BBH is offline
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Originally Posted by IUmom20n21 View Post
Hi all. New here, but have been lurking for a few days.

I have both a son and daughter at IU. My son is in a fraternity and my daughter is currently a nervous wreck, waiting for tonight.

I read on another site that calls to girls who didn't get a bid have started. Best of luck to all!
I saw that site as well, sending positive thoughts out to everyone.
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  #190  
Old 01-16-2018, 02:12 PM
ForeverRoses ForeverRoses is offline
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bid lists have been released to chapters, so it would make sense that the calls have started. I hope everyone has a wonderful and safe bid night! (and stays warm! it will be six degrees tonight!).
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  #191  
Old 01-16-2018, 02:14 PM
GLE23 GLE23 is offline
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May daughter just texted that her Rho Gamma called her to let her know she's getting a bid tonight. Wait #1 is over. Wait #2 begins!
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  #192  
Old 01-16-2018, 02:19 PM
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Hang in there parents it's almost over. Hoping you all received good news tonight from your new members!
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  #193  
Old 01-16-2018, 02:28 PM
IUmom20n21 IUmom20n21 is offline
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Originally Posted by GLE23 View Post
May daughter just texted that her Rho Gamma called her to let her know she's getting a bid tonight. Wait #1 is over. Wait #2 begins!
I thought calls were made only if they weren't getting a bid (??) Is it normal to be called if you ARE getting a bid?
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  #194  
Old 01-16-2018, 02:33 PM
GLE23 GLE23 is offline
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Originally Posted by IUmom20n21 View Post
I thought calls were made only if they weren't getting a bid (??) Is it normal to be called if you ARE getting a bid?
Her RG told them that she would be calling, texting, or visiting all of them this afternoon (the exact method depended a bit on class schedules, etc.) My D knew to expect to hear something one way or the other, but I'm not sure if that is up to RG discretion.
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  #195  
Old 01-16-2018, 03:06 PM
ForeverRoses ForeverRoses is offline
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Originally Posted by IUmom20n21 View Post
I thought calls were made only if they weren't getting a bid (??) Is it normal to be called if you ARE getting a bid?
I think the Rho Gammas call just to relieve the stress either way. If they didn't get a bid, the Rho Gammas try to visit in person. The women no longer get bids delivered to their rooms. They now open them en mass at the tennis center (at least I think that's where it was last year) and then take busses to their houses.

Depending on the Rho Gamma, some of them only had 6-8 women left in recruitment during preference, while another was in the 20s.
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