Psycho/Stalker PNM's?! - Page 8

UGAalum94 · #**106** 07-06-2007, 01:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

Awww...I was disapointed when this thread was bumped, and there were no new addtions.

The only good story I have is that 2 girls who were New Members when my chapter closed, still claim to be ASAs. I don't think either of them have even been through the Phoenix (pledging) ceremony, let alone initiation. I haven't seen either recently, but I know one of them has ASA listed on her MySpace, and the other one was wearing block letters and carrying a tote and keyring a year after we closed. The one that continued to wear letters wants to AI, but she has yet (almost 5 years later, and she was a Jr. when she was bid) to finish a degree, so is not eligible.

Aw, I kind of feel bad for them. It's the only group they ever knew, and it's not like they left the group (or never got a bid); they got a bid and then the group left them.

It seems more sad than psycho to me, but maybe a lot of things are both.

KSUViolet06 · #**107** 08-14-2007, 07:47 PM

I posted this story about another chapter's run-in with a psychotic PNM last fall in the 'Weird Rush Stories' thread:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...&postcount=559

Then there was this little update:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...&postcount=569

Well, I heard from an XY sister that Crying Girl has signed up for recruitment this fall. I'm assisting my chapter as an alumna so I've been talking to alumnae from other sororities as well, including those from XY. They are worried that her behavior will start up again and possibly become aggressive if she does not receive a bid this fall.

Drolefille · #**108** 08-14-2007, 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I posted this story about another chapter's run-in with a psychotic PNM last fall in the 'Weird Rush Stories' thread:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...&postcount=559

Then there was this little update:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...&postcount=569

Well, I heard from an XY sister that Crying Girl has signed up for recruitment this fall. I'm assisting my chapter as an alumna so I've been talking to alumnae from other sororities as well, including those from XY. They are worried that her behavior will start up again and possibly become aggressive if she does not receive a bid this fall.

Dropping her like a hot potato?

Having the Rho Chi's take her to the counseling center if(when) she's dropped from all chapters?

UGAalum94 · #**109** 08-14-2007, 08:00 PM

Honestly, I really think the administration at your college is doing a disservice to that young women and all the groups by even allowing her to rush after the stuff from last year.

I know that everyone is hesitant to act unless there's a clear cut blanket policy, but someone should man or women up and call her in to talk to her that her behavior last year was not within acceptable boundaries, and as a result panhellenic does not want her to participate in recruitment again.

If she fights it, then let her rush with the understanding that she will be cut out after first round. and that the mental health center will be in contact with her.

KSUViolet06 · #**110** 08-14-2007, 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drolefille

Dropping her like a hot potato?

Having the Rho Chi's take her to the counseling center if(when) she's dropped from all chapters?

It's tough because we can speculate that she IS going to be dropped by everyone again. The greek community is not huge, everybody knows about her and her episodes at the XY house. No one can tell her NOT to rush again obviously. We just don't know how she is going to react, particularly toward XY. We don't want her to become violent or aggressive toward other sororities.

BabyPiNK_FL · #**111** 08-14-2007, 08:35 PM

Maybe someone (and I know from personal experience that this is difficult) from the university can contact her parents and inform them of her behavior. Even though she's not "hurting" anybody she's mentally affecting others and that's not okay. And as a member of Panhellenic I totally would have told her I "ran out of forms" and if she paid online I would boot her from the system and refund her money through the ICS. I definitely would not force the chapters to see someone who has this type of behavior nor allow her to do this to herself again. Obviously talking to her does no good. Does your school have GPA requirements to rush? Does she fulfill them? (You'd think that her crying must get in the way of an education). Or a judicial council that XY can file an official complaint with? They can force her to get help and suspend/expel her from school if she refuses to do so if there is enough of a problem. I should know, I had a harasser of mine (someone who no one would have expected) suspended from school until that person got counseling. And I had a "stay away" order sent to this person via campus police (it's not quite a restraining order but it formally lets this person know that you do not want them near you). Perhaps that is an option.

UGAalum94 · #**112** 08-14-2007, 08:48 PM

Although I agree that actually barring her from registration might be hard or even impossible, I happen to think that people can tell her not to rush.

The director of student activities or dean of students or whatever you got can call her into his/her office and say, "We do not think that your participation in recruitment is a good idea based on last year's experience. We are refunding your registration fee and strongly discourage any attempts on your part to re-register."

Because she's established that she's crazy, she might not heed the warning, but it seems that having made clear that her participation is unwelcome, it's going to be easier for groups to call the cops if she shows up after she's been released.

And again, it's really hard to accept that the college is taking this woman's issues very seriously. It seems to me that the campus climate about crazy people might be a little different post Virginia Tech (not that she's that kind of crazy) and that the school should be doing more here. It's kind of appalling that they are so committed to not dealing with it.

BetteDavisEyes · #**113** 08-14-2007, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Well, I heard from an XY sister that Crying Girl has signed up for recruitment this fall. I'm assisting my chapter as an alumna so I've been talking to alumnae from other sororities as well, including those from XY. They are worried that her behavior will start up again and possibly become aggressive if she does not receive a bid this fall.

Holy Crap! That's one freaking weirdo right there. I'd be worried too that she'd do something twisted like hurt herself or a sister in her desperation to be a part of them.

LXA SE285 · #**114** 08-14-2007, 10:51 PM

Quote:

Does your school have GPA requirements to rush? Does she fulfill them? (You'd think that her crying must get in the way of an education).

I'd be willing to bet that she has the grades—based on what KSUV06 has posted previously, she's capable of pulling it together and presenting normally under different circumstances. I really hope she gets the help she needs ...

Drolefille · #**115** 08-14-2007, 11:18 PM

While you may not be able to stop her from rushing, I'd suggest seeing if someone from the counseling center would be willing to be around for any PNM who is dropped but particularly for this girl.

I figured most of the chapters would drop her based on her behavior. I feel bad assuming she won't get a bid, but lets face it. She won't get a bid.

Fleur de Lis · #**116** 08-15-2007, 12:41 PM

My stories are not nearly as dramatic, but that's probably a good thing.

I had a "friend" who was going through recruitment (we hold it in January) and all during fall semester, she talked about how much she LOVED Kappa and knew all these sisters and couldn't wait to be one of us. I had just initiated the year before, so I was pretty excited about Kappa too, and didn't think it was that wierd. Well, January comes and I am really pulling for this girl, and two sisters announce they were her (neutral) orientation leaders and she was a BEYOTCH to them. It turns out she was incredibly manipulative and totally fooled those of us who were her "friends". She was obviously cut and never even made eye contact with me again!

A girl from my high school was showing some signs of wierdness/instability at the end of senior year. She assumed everything her sister had done would be handed to her on a platter. (not an easy act to follow - captain of the cheerleading squad, homecoming court, now a successful lawyer). Her sister had been in one of the best sororities at UGA and she thought she was "guaranteed" a bid. She went to each of the houses and said things like "So I hear you're the bitchy sorority?"

She ended up dropping out of school altogether and living at home again. Last I heard she was taking pre-recs for law school at a local college.

KSUViolet06 · #**117** 08-15-2007, 09:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BabyPiNK_FL

Even though she's not "hurting" anybody she's mentally affecting others and that's not okay. And as a member of Panhellenic I totally would have told her I "ran out of forms" and if she paid online I would boot her from the system and refund her money through the ICS. I definitely would not force the chapters to see someone who has this type of behavior nor allow her to do this to herself again. Obviously talking to her does no good. Does your school have GPA requirements to rush? Does she fulfill them? (You'd think that her crying must get in the way of an education). Or a judicial council that XY can file an official complaint with? They can force her to get help and suspend/expel her from school if she refuses to do so if there is enough of a problem. I should know, I had a harasser of mine (someone who no one would have expected) suspended from school until that person got counseling. And I had a "stay away" order sent to this person via campus police (it's not quite a restraining order but it formally lets this person know that you do not want them near you). Perhaps that is an option.

To answer some of your questions:

*PHC and the Greek Life staff have determined that since she meets all the requirements, they can't prevent her from rushing.

*We do have a university judicial affairs system, and XY did consult a representative. He told them that they didn't have case because she hasn't violated a university conduct rule (basically unless she causes harm or threatens them, she can't be brought to student court).

*The chapter has alerted the university police and they have said that if she is seen on the property again that she'll be arrested for trespassing.

UGAalum94 · #**118** 08-15-2007, 09:58 PM

What do you think about how they are handling it, KSUViolet?

I know I've jumped in and been all judgmental, but as someone on the scene, do you think they are doing enough?

Do you think Greek Life is just be cowardly?

SoCalGirl · #**119** 08-15-2007, 10:43 PM

So if the police are willing to arrest her for tresspassing wouldn't that prevent her from attending the chapter during recruitment?

TSteven · #**120** 08-15-2007, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoCalGirl

So if the police are willing to arrest her for tresspassing wouldn't that prevent her from attending the chapter during recruitment?

I believe it would only apply to invite parties.

As I understand it, if you sign up for recruitment, then you are at least "invited" to the "open" (first) parties. At the point in the rounds or parties where she is *not* invited (i.e. not on the list), then she would be tresspassing if she showed up etc. And of course if she shows up during any other time when she isn't invited. (i.e. between rounds, after being cut etc.)

Otherwise, it seems like they would have to have a restraining order to keep her from attending the open (first) party.