Rushing as a Junior

[33girl]

Originally Posted by psusue

My point is this-- why in the world would you want to get an entirely new group of friends your junior year?

• Boyfriend breakup.
  
• Friend breakup.
  
• Changed major and have far more time on hands.

I think that a junior who is a "clean slate" can go in at quite a few schools and receive a bid to a group she loves and who loves her with a minimum of trouble, BUT the OP's problem is that she's already gone through rush, received a bid, and declined it. Anyone who does that is going to be looked at doubly closely, no matter their class status. Unless she happens to have befriended a whole bunch of girls in another chapter, I don't have a good feeling about this one.

[DubaiSis]

Also, even at a small noncompetitive school, she could have been really nervous and just bombed. Going back again a little more prepared and confident could (theoretically) change her outcome.

But as has been said here a million times, you won't know if you don't try. Do your homework, be open to EVERY sorority, and who knows? Maybe it will work out better next time. But start with a sit down with yourself about what went wrong last time. And be honest with yourself. It will do you no good to say to yourself that YOU are awesome and they just didn't see it. Or the orange and green polka dot culottes were a fashion statement, or...

[~sunflower~]

You have given me some great things to think about. And, out of curiousity, if I do decide to re-rush will it be known that I am re-rushing? I think honest is the best policy in this situation and explaining my situation throughly will be my best bet, but I was just wondering what they will already know about me.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by ~sunflower~

You have given me some great things to think about. And, out of curiousity, if I do decide to re-rush will it be known that I am re-rushing? I think honest is the best policy in this situation and explaining my situation throughly will be my best bet, but I was just wondering what they will already know about me.

The chapter you declined the bid from will obviously know you're re-rushing, and depending on how small your Greek system is, word can get around really fast.

I wouldn't say "hi, I'm sunflower and I'm rerushing" but if you are asked about it, you need to be truthful and say you are. Theoretically the conversation should end there, as sororities aren't supposed to talk about other sororities during rush.

[Barbie's_Rush]

Originally Posted by ~sunflower~

You have given me some great things to think about. And, out of curiousity, if I do decide to re-rush will it be known that I am re-rushing? I think honest is the best policy in this situation and explaining my situation throughly will be my best bet, but I was just wondering what they will already know about me.

Typically sororities will not receive an indication you are re-rushing but that could vary depending on the school. However people will either remember you from last year, hear the rumor about the re-rushing girl who got a bid last year (yes, girls do talk between chapters) or you will be asked during conversations why you haven't rushed before your junior year, to which you will have to give an honest answer. Do not even think about fudging the truth because it will come out.

[Splash]

Do we know her school? If asked, answer honestly, but spin in your favor. If they don't bring it up, then don't bring it up either.

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by ~sunflower~

You have given me some great things to think about. And, out of curiousity, if I do decide to re-rush will it be known that I am re-rushing? I think honest is the best policy in this situation and explaining my situation throughly will be my best bet, but I was just wondering what they will already know about me.

You went through rush and met these women once before. Depending on the size of your school, chances are good that they will remember you. I know at my school we would have.

[AZTheta]

From the perspective of a "large" school (~1200 pnms going through recruitment), advisors do talk to each other as well (actives are always so surprised when they discover this fact). And yes, the actives and the advisors do recall pnms, and not always for negative reasons. That is about the extent of what I'm comfortable saying without straying into membership selection territory.

As you've been told, don't overstate your case or provide too much information, but answer simply and honestly. You have a lot of time to work out what you would like to say and internalize it so that it's natural before recruitment starts. Focus on the future, and do your best.

[~sunflower~]

Thank you all for your advice. I followed your advice and have asked some of my friends who have already joined a sorority what they thought about my situation in regards to my school. Hopefully their input in addition to the ideas I got on here will help me make my final decision. Luckily I still have a few months to decide what I should do and to start planning if I decide to rush again

[~sunflower~]

So, I have given this a lot of thought and I think I have come to a final decision...but there are still a few questions I have. Rush is about a month away so I still have a lot of thoughts I am processing.

1. It was suggested that I talk to some of my friends who were already affiliated and ask them what they thought about my situation. I talked to one of my good friends who rushed last year, so she has only experienced one side of recruitment. She talked to her big who was on the Recruitment team for Panhellenic. Her big said she thought I should go through recruitment and see what happens, but that she (or my friend) couldn't really say anymore because that would be dirty rushing. On one hand, that seems promising, but it's also vauge and more of a "we can't say anything, but give it a try"
2. It was also suggested that I reflect on what I have improved upon this year and why I would be a better canidate this year then I was last year. One of the biggest changes I think would be that my GPA improved over the course of last year. It went from a 3.25 to a 3.54, and will only be going up from here on out Another thing that I think makes me better qualified is the fact that last year I was extremly busy and was involved in an organization on the National level which was quite a bit time consuming. It was a children's organization, and this year I have aged out, so I no longer have that as a time commitment. This also means that I have more time to invest in a new passion of mine (which I'm hoping could possibly be a sorority if I recieve a bid)
3. Finally, when I'm talking to members during rush and they say "Why did you wait until your Junior year to rush?" it was said that I should absolutly tell the truth, which I intend on doing, but I guess what I am wondering is Should I say "Well, I did rush last year, but there were a lot of factors that came up ($, parents support, time commitments etc) that prevented me from joining a sorority", and thus kind of skirt around the issue that I recieved a bid and dropped it, or should I be straight forward if asked and say "Well, I did rush last year and recieved a bid but there were a lot of.... (like I said in the other example)

I guess a lot of what I just wrote was for my own internalization, but I'm also wondering if my thoughts were logical, or if I am completly on the wrong page when looking at rushing again? I think a lot of what I wrote, may be things that I kind of say if I go through rush. I know that if I do go through recruitment it will be much more difficult then if I was a freshman, but I have been doing my research and hopefully I know what I am up against. Any thoughts you guys have will be appreciated and considered! Thank you!!

[PanseyGirl]

I totally agree with adpiucf! You really do not have anything to lose and if you do not rush, you will always wonder what would have happened if you did.

[DubaiSis]

The best answer is the shortest answer, but yes, you can tell them you went through and for a variety of reasons didn't finish. I'm sorry, it's 1 AM my time so I'm not going to go back through to read, but were you offered a spot and you declined it, you quit midway, were cut midway? In any case, I'd find an answer that makes you seem enthusiastic about the NOW and hope to make the best of the time you still have left in college and your future life as an alumna. Don't be defensive or sound like you're trying to dance around the issue.

Your friends are right - it can quickly stray into dirty rush or secret stuff if they told you more. Your grades are very good. Brush up on your conversation skills and make sure your appearance is all you want it to be. And hope for the best! That's all you can do. Understand some chapters may not be cool with your age, but others might be just fine about it, and go in ready to wow them. Good luck!

[Strawberrygloss]

Sunflower, your situation seems similar to mine. I rerushed when I was a Sophomore, had an excellent recruitment and ended up getting the bid to my very favorite sorority.

My re-rush link is here:
http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...trawberrygloss

However to have a successful recruitment I knew I needed to change and improve some things big time.
1. I talked to basically any friend I had in the sorority. I sent them all messages in the spring telling them that I really enjoyed their chapter and asked them if I was COB'ing. So about 6/8 of the sororities had gals that knew I was interested in them.
2. I talked to a girl in my dorm that was in one of my favorite sororities. She knew my personality, but also knew that I was super shy and bombed recruitment in the Fall. She gave me a lot of pointers like having a lot of energy, being interested in what they were saying and very animated.
3. I had letter of Rec's to every sorority
4. For me, I needed a serious confidence boost. I felt so rejected from Greek Life the year prior, so for me the boost came from wearing comfortable, stylish clothes that really flattered my body.
5. I also practiced Rush conversations with my mom and honestly everyone that I met. Rush conversations are so different in that they're like speed-dating. Be cheerful, interested in what they're saying and you can always ask about them! People LOVE talking about themselves. One of the best tips I have ever been given for rush conversations is to listen for the nouns in what your person is saying. For example: Rusher: "I love XYZ sorority, we have really fun sisterhoods such as going to the corn maze during halloween and going hiking"
You've got 3 nouns to go off of. Since I'm into hiking I would say "Oh I love hiking! Do you hike a lot?" Or whatever. Ask a question back to the rusher about herself.
6. I also knew the typical questions they were going to ask "Where are you from?" "Where are you living?"I was living in an apartment that year, so I mentioned that and added "with three roommates whom I LOVE. We cook together and have movie nights together." This gave the rusher many topics to go off of.

The last page of my re-recruitment story goes over the changes I made more in depth. Good luck to you!

[~sunflower~]

Strawberrygloss, Thank YOU! You're recruitment story is really inspiring for me (and I'm sure for other girls who are in similar situations). I already feel a bit more confident about this! You have some really great tips and I will be sure to do some practice conversations so I can be as prepared as possible!

DubaiSis, Yes, I recieved a bid and signed, but dropped it the very next day. I'm already thinking of positive spins I can put to my answers regarding those questions about re-rushing and I will be sure to be thinking about the NOW. What happend last fall, happened in the past and all I can worry about is how I present myself NOW

[Splash]

If THEY bring it up, "I rushed last year, but didn't end up pledging."