Dropping?

cocoxchanel · #1 10-21-2012, 02:35 PM

A new sorority colonized at my school and I decided to join it. However I never did formal recruitment so I never got to see the other sororities my campus has. Additionally since it's new here, I feel like I'm not getting the typical sorority experience that all my other friends are getting (while paying a lot more than them) and I just don't know if this is the right sorority for me. Because it's new no one really knows each other, I know this will improve over time though. I haven't been initiated yet so I can easily drop out but if I don't get the sorority I want next year, it's a big risk. Therefore I need some help on what's best.

als463 · #2 10-21-2012, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cocoxchanel

A new sorority colonized at my school and I decided to join it. However I never did formal recruitment so I never got to see the other sororities my campus has. Additionally since it's new here, I feel like I'm not getting the typical sorority experience that all my other friends are getting (while paying a lot more than them) and I just don't know if this is the right sorority for me. Because it's new no one really knows each other, I know this will improve over time though. I haven't been initiated yet so I can easily drop out but if I don't get the sorority I want next year, it's a big risk. Therefore I need some help on what's best.

Wow, you sound really ungrateful. There are other girls who could have had your spot. You haven't even initiated yet and you just interviewed and received a bid to this colonization and you are already thinking of dropping? Please do. Sororities don't need women like you who have no idea how lucky they are to even be there. Stop wasting everyone else's time.

DubaiSis · #3 10-21-2012, 02:52 PM

Did you think the starting from scratch, this is a lot more responsibility than being a regular pledge, opportunity to build your own traditions was a lie? I don't believe you weren't told any of this. On the other hand, it is not unusual to to have "buyer's remorse" for lack of a better word, and there are undoubtedly girls who committed to a sorority during formal rush who wish they'd held out for the colony. And to be perfectly clear, just because you drop out of your colony doesn't mean an older chapter on campus will want you. PLUS, you will have proven that you don't have any desire to work hard to make the most of your sorority membership. Just because colony membership is hard doesn't mean older chapters are free of responsibility.

I would consider your options the colony or nothing. While there's a CHANCE you could make it into another sorority, I wouldn't plan on it.

Splash · #4 10-21-2012, 03:20 PM

Before you make your decision, keep this in mind:

Let's say you drop and re-rush through formal recruitment and don't get into the sorority you want (or any) and then you're left without being in a sorority at all. Is the risk worth it? You decide.

I don't know what school you're at, but sometimes people that drop from pledging to re-rush or being an upperclassmen hurts your chances of getting a bid.

If you DO decide to drop and re-rush, I'd suggest making sure your grades are good, getting recs to all the sororities (who knows if one you hadn't previously considered ends up being a fav?), and most importantly make friends with sorority members.

Personally, I'd stick it out though. Just seems like less work/hassle and usually people that stick it out end up loving their sorority. Just my 2 cents

FSUZeta · #5 10-21-2012, 07:30 PM

Low C Sharp is right. Most often new members in established sororities feel awkward and like they don't fit in as the excitement of recruitment wears off and they settle down into the sorority routine. We have had a rash of new members come to GC this semester who were contemplating resigning their pledgeships.

I advised a colony, and I was amazed at the hard work the colonists had to do. They are not only learning the regular new member things, but they are also having to learn how a chapter is supposed to function. It is a big responsibility, but I know that the young women who saw it through and are now alumnae would not trade all the hard work for anything. They are still a close-knit group and many of them show up to assist with recruitment year after year.

Being a member of a colony is a rare privilege-one not many people get to have. Think hard before you make your decision.

Giddy · #6 10-21-2012, 07:34 PM

Speak to someone in Student Life who can talk to you confidentially about things such as Greek membership. It's a different experience to start something new than to join a mature group. I can see where it might seem overwelming. Like everything in life, both experiences have their plusses and minuses. This was mentioned earler, but be aware that your dropping out of one sorority may not help you get into another. (Unless other sorority members have expressed interest in you joining their group.) Not impossible. But it's a risk other rushees don't carry. If you decide it isn't for you, then move on with a clear conscience and confidence in your future happiness with or without sorority membership.

adpiucf · #7 10-21-2012, 10:43 PM

There is a very simple solution here. If you're unhappy in your sorority, and you've made a concerted effort to be happy, then just drop out and move on.

Colonies are a lot of work, and if you think you'd be happier in a more established chapter, drop out of the colony and go through formal recruitment next year. Keep in mind that there are still membership requirements and trials and tribulations in any sorority. Even women who get their top choice often have second thoughts or doubts at some point. It's not always sunshine and rainbows.

This is a very simple choice. The colony will survive and thrive, with or without you. If you don't want to participate, then drop and try again next year in formal recruitment. At best, you receive a bid. At worst, you don't receive a bid. No one is going to beat their chest and tear out their hair over the agony of you leaving the colony. So make up your mind. Stay or go.

adpimiz · #8 10-21-2012, 11:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by adpiucf

There is a very simple solution here. If you're unhappy in your sorority, and you've made a concerted effort to be happy, then just drop out and move on.

Colonies are a lot of work, and if you think you'd be happier in a more established chapter, drop out of the colony and go through formal recruitment next year. Keep in mind that there are still membership requirements and trials and tribulations in any sorority. Even women who get their top choice often have second thoughts or doubts at some point. It's not always sunshine and rainbows.

This is a very simple choice. The colony will survive and thrive, with or without you. If you don't want to participate, then drop and try again next year in formal recruitment. At best, you receive a bid. At worst, you don't receive a bid. No one is going to beat their chest and tear out their hair over the agony of you leaving the colony. So make up your mind. Stay or go.

Yep.

ADPi95 · #9 10-22-2012, 12:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cocoxchanel

A new sorority colonized at my school and I decided to join it. However I never did formal recruitment so I never got to see the other sororities my campus has. Additionally since it's new here, I feel like I'm not getting the typical sorority experience that all my other friends are getting (while paying a lot more than them) and I just don't know if this is the right sorority for me. Because it's new no one really knows each other, I know this will improve over time though. I haven't been initiated yet so I can easily drop out but if I don't get the sorority I want next year, it's a big risk. Therefore I need some help on what's best.

No one can tell you what's best for you. Only you can decide what that is. That being said, you're absolutely right: you probably aren't getting the typical sorority experience. And that's a good thing! To be able to call yourself a founding member, to take pride in being part of a new colonization, to come together with an amazing group of women, is an amazing opportunity not to many women get the chance to experience.

But if you aren't happy, perhaps it isn't the right sorority for you. Then again, any sorority you ultimately join (if you are lucky to receive a bid) also involves an investment of your time in order to acclimate and adjust to new sisters.

agzg · #10 10-22-2012, 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by als463

Wow, you sound really ungrateful. There are other girls who could have had your spot. You haven't even initiated yet and you just interviewed and received a bid to this colonization and you are already thinking of dropping? Please do. Sororities don't need women like you who have no idea how lucky they are to even be there. Stop wasting everyone else's time.

This is too harsh. There are a lot of reasons why a new colony member might feel like she's getting the short end of the stick. I can understand why someone who didn't go through FR wouldn't feel like she was getting the "full" sorority experience. I'd hardly call it "ungrateful." Such a huge amount of work can be daunting.

To the OP, colonies are a lot of work, but they also have fantastic rewards. There are a number of women on GC who were involved in a colony. My advice would be to not take the risk on FR next year - you don't know that you would get a bid, and you'd have already burned your bridges. Because colonies are a blank slate, you can really make what you want of it to a degree that members of established chapters may not.

HOWEVER, if you aren't willing to do the work (totally fine if you're not, not everybody is), you may as well drop and try FR, but know that you'll be closing the door on several options not only with your colony now, but dropping may reflect negatively on you with other chapters on your campus as well. So you may be making the choice to not be in a sorority.

33girl · #11 10-22-2012, 10:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cocoxchanel

A new sorority colonized at my school and I decided to join it. However I never did formal recruitment so I never got to see the other sororities my campus has. Additionally since it's new here, I feel like I'm not getting the typical sorority experience that all my other friends are getting (while paying a lot more than them) and I just don't know if this is the right sorority for me. Because it's new no one really knows each other, I know this will improve over time though. I haven't been initiated yet so I can easily drop out but if I don't get the sorority I want next year, it's a big risk. Therefore I need some help on what's best.

If you mean things like family traditions within the sorority, mixers with well established fraternities, and a house, then guess what? It's up to YOU (and all your new pledge sisters) to help start those traditions. Then YOU can come back in 10 years, point and say "Hey. I thought of that."

If this doesn't appeal to you, then you probably shouldn't be part of a colony.