"Dropping" a girlfriend with fraternity letters

[lllll]

What all is involved in "dropping" a girlfriend? I have been with my girlfriend for almost 10 months and would like to "drop" her. What do I have to do?

[Zeta_Girl]

Maybe I don't understand your quiestion...but are you asking how to break up with her?

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"Only The Best Get Crowned"

[ZTAngel]

No, he's talking about lavaliering his girlfriend. I don't know exactly how you would do it. It varies from one fraternity to another. Some have ceremonies while in others, you just randomly give the girl your letters. Maybe just ask one of your brothers what dropping her would involve.

[Q-T Pie]

I know that the same question was asked a while back. I'm not sure which main section it was under, but if you find it, it may help you a bit.

[bucutie02]

Well one of my good friends was dropped earlier this year. She had been with her boyfriend for less than a year, but he still decided to go through it. When she told me about it, she just said that he talked about how much he loved her and wanted to be with her the rest of his life and then he gave her his letters. There was no ceromony or anything. He is a TKE, so i dont really know if they hold ceromonies, or maybe it is his chapter. Well about maybe a couple of months ago, they go in to this HUGE fight and what ended up happening was that she threw his letters back at him and they broke up! I know this one had a bad ending to it, but if you are sure that you want to drop your girlfriend, then i wish you the best! I hope i was somewhat of a help to you

[Amye Leighann]

At my school when a soroity girl is dropped(for those of you who don't know what dropping means, it is when a frat. guy gives his girlfriend his letters to show to her she is the equivalent to his brothers) the guy does it in front of her entire chapter at a meeting with his brothers present and tells her how much he loves her and asks her to wear his letters, and all of the girls usually cry.

[Pike4Life]

Lavaliering your girl is considered SERIOUS business for most fraternities. For Pike, it is considered to be equivilent to a pre-engagement type of thing, and is NOT something most guys would do for a girlfriend of 10 months. But like I said, it differs from group to group. For me, I lavaliered my girlfriend of THREE YEARS with a small ceremony that showed her what those letters meant to me.
When I was thinking of "dropping" her (I'd never heard that term before now, but I get it...you give her a charm of drop letters...cute) I asked my Big Brother about the proper way to do it and he clued me in to traditions and ways other guys had done it. For most sororities, when a girl is lavaliered, they hold a "candel light ceremony" for her, so that might be a way to go...you do it in front of her sisters and they ALL cry.
But BEWARE...some fraternities have a tradition of "treeing" Brothers who lavalier girls. Getting treed depends on your frat and sometimes how serious your Brothers think your relationship with your girl is, as well as how closely the members regard giving away your letters.

[This message has been edited by Pike4Life (edited December 07, 2000).]

[AXO Alum]

Pike4Life - You may want to edit your post and remove the part of it that some people (long term members know who "all" I mean) could misconstrue as another ill of greek life. There is so much BS going on in some forums about hazing and stuff, that I just don't want to add fuel to the fire. No harm meant - just trying to prevent another thread from flaming

Amye - Your description was good, but in my opinion, I wouldn't say its to show to her that she is the equivalent to his brothers. Its more of an outward token when both members are greek.

As far as what I've seen the ceremonies vary from simple and private to entire chapters. The best ones were when we'd have a candlelight and a girl wouldn't know it was for her. Then as the candle passed, when she was holding it, her little and big sister would lean over and blow it out. Then he would come in with the lavalier. Oh - I'm getting teary eyed thinking about those...how romantic! Wish my guy had been greek. Its a very serious thing and we also think of it as a pre-engagement deal.

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"Alpha Chi Omega - If you only had 2 wishes, what would your second one be?"

[Pike4Life]

Good point AXO Alum...I know how many people view all Greeks as a bunch of binge-drinking, membership hazing, bad-grade getting, promiscious idiots. Some traditions, even the most innocent, can be misconstrued as supporting that incorrect and inflamatory stereotypical view of fraternity and sorority members.
Therefore, I did alter the message a bit, but I still think "Illll" should be aware of the possibilities.

[CutiePie2000]

Would someone please tell me what a
lavalier is? Is it the actual pendant with the Greek letters on it (worn on a necklace chain?

Sorry, but I've heard of this term, but never quite been sure what it refers to!

[Pike4Life]

You've pretty much got it right Cutie...a "lavalier" is a charm or pendant worn on a necklace that has a GLO letters' on it.
There are actually two types -- sorority lavaliers and fraternity lavaliers.
Sorority lavaliers are usually round pendants with a girl's own sorority letters engraved in it, and are usually given to girls by their Big Sisters after initiation.
Fraternity lavaliers, on the other hand, are usually charms that have a fraternity's letters arranged in a drop formation (vertical), or have the fraternity letters in a diagonal drop surrounded by a heart. In the case of fraternity lavaliers, a guy gives one to his girlfriend -- a process which is referred to as lavaliering, or "dropping" (due to the "drop" formation the letters are arranged on the pendant).

[Pike4Life]

You've pretty much got it right Cutie...a "lavalier" is a charm or pendant worn on a necklace that has a GLO letters' on it.
There are actually two types -- sorority lavaliers and fraternity lavaliers.
Sorority lavaliers are usually round pendants with a girl's own sorority letters engraved in it, and are usually given to girls by their Big Sisters after initiation.
Fraternity lavaliers, on the other hand, are usually charms that have a fraternity's letters arranged in a drop formation (vertical), or have the fraternity letters in a diagonal drop surrounded by a heart. In the case of fraternity lavaliers, a guy gives one to his girlfriend -- a process which is referred to as lavaliering, or "dropping" (due to the "drop" formation the letters are arranged on the pendant).

[33girl]

Originally posted by CutiePie2000:
Would someone please tell me what a
lavalier is? Is it the actual pendant with the Greek letters on it (worn on a necklace chain?

Sorry, but I've heard of this term, but never quite been sure what it refers to!

Here's a site where you can go to look at lavaliers: http://www.burrpatt.com

Sorority lavaliers can come in all kinds - the round or paddle shaped engraved disks, the dropped or staggered letters, or even ones with the mascot. Often each "family" in a sorority has a distinctive style and metal (silverplate or goldplate) of lavalier. For example, my family lavalier was silver with diagonal letters. The styles also vary from sorority to sorority and school to school.




[This message has been edited by 33girl (edited December 08, 2000).]

[USFSDTAlum]

My sorority's lavilere is the drop lavilere while you are an active sister, when you become alum, the lavilere has our letters on a diagonal (but still in the "drop" fashion)

[Aurora]

Do sorority women lavalier their boyfriends too (like exchanging class rings in highschool) or do they keep theirs. I guess what I'm asking is: Is it just a guy thing?