Need some Advice

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by PM_Mama00

Yeah but it can belong to any college also. Please stop acting like a know it all. Even if you do know what college it is, you do not need to broadcast it.

Look...she wants to know what her chances are of getting re-bid are after depledging. Those who don't know what school she's at can speculate all they want about what un-competitive means. To someone who went to Bama, UofI may seem uncompetitive, and yet a sophomore who depledged might not have a good chance at a bid there. I'm telling her that I know what school it is, and her chances of getting another bid are good...depending on how she presents herself at rush. If you were in her situation, would you rather have random people guessing (AKA blowing sunshine up your ass), or real information from someone who knows your school?

[KDMafia]

I also came from a midwest school with a non competitive greak system and low enrollment. I know at my school depledging was not held against girls as long as there wasn't a lot of drama associated with it.

If you are interested in trying to join back up with your original chapter then I would contact them first. However, if you would prefer another over them it might not be wise to start contacting them. I liked the advice of going to COB events in the spring, also, if you have friends that are in the other sorority, use them as a way to get your story out. They can let the rest of their sisters know that you were having situational issues at teh time but that it's not about to happen again. If you dont have any friends in the sorority...make some. This is the best way to get to know the sisters and have them get to know the real you.?

[Drolefille]

DOH! Please ignore this. I got my threads confused

[deadbear80]

It really depends on the school. I went to a medium-sized private university with a fairly active greek system. However, it was not uncommon for girls to depledge and then through either COB or the next year's formal recruitment, join a different chapter. I can name at least 2-3 of my chapter sisters who did that. However, I don't know what happened to them when they went to their former chapter during formal recruitment and how they were treated. My chapter never had a girl depledge from our chapter and join another one on campus so I can't tell you how we would have treated them--I do know that we didn't look poorly on girls who re-rushed after depledging a different chapter on campus.

I would see if you could talk to someone in greek life on campus who you trust and see what they have to say.

[KerriMarie]

Originally Posted by AGDee

I might also wonder why you didn't return to your original chapter. One of my sister-daughter's had a bunch of things happen during the semester she was pledging (grandma died, broke her foot, had to drop out of school for the semester) and we just held her over until the next semester. Usually chapters can work things out with you if it's truly only personal reasons.

That happened to one of my little sisters too - she had to leave Kappa, and it was so sad, but she came back the next semester - yay happy times! Then I ended up with "twin" little sisters.

[EGAOPi]

Originally Posted by Collegegirl822

Hi! okay so I figured this would be the best place to post this- I really want some honest advice, here's the situation...

I am a freshman at a college in the midwest, I went through fall recruitment, and had great experiences at two houses, I didn't get prefed at these houses, in fact- I got pref'ed at my bottom 2. I kept an open mind and went through pref. I ended up getting a bid from one of those houses- and accepting it. However things just weren't working out, some finantial, and personal issues were not "falling into place" so i depledged.

I still want to be greek- and I want to rush again. At my school It's not uncommon for upperclassmen to go through recruitment, and get bids, however I'm worried I won't have a chance now that I've had to depledge.

So heres what i need advice on
will the houses count it against me because i depledged?
and
How should i handle the akward situations that will arise during formal recruitment nextfall, relating to my depledging?

ALSO i just thought of this- I still really like my #1 house, should i make an effort to get to know the girls in that house better? or will this seem like i'm only trying to befriend them to get a bid in the fall? Should I let them know of my interest in their house?

THANKS SOO MUCH!!

I know that if you explained your situation to your sorority, you may have not had to depledge. A lot of sororities offer financial support, like scholarships for sisters in dire need or accomodatiosn that would allow you to pay your dues on your own terms that you work out with your treasurer. If you pulled them aside and spoke to them, it may have made things easier.
My question is this: if you only have good things to say about that house, do you want to go BACK to that house?
It seems like your heart is still set on your #1 choice, but why would you still have them as you #1 choice when you clearly weren't theirs? Everything happens for a reason and I believe the sorority experience is what you make of it. If a house really wants you and you can feel a connection, even in the slightest, it CAN become your home. I know so many girls that got their last choices and wished they had gotten their #1 choice for so long, but eventually everything fell into place and now, there is no place they'd rather be.
If you miss your sorority, I would talk to them. Meet with some of them for lunch or something and thoroughly explain your situation. You may be able to return to the chapter. I'm not sure if you'd have to go thru recruitment again, but I'm sure they could let you know.
If you still have a pressing desire to join another chapter, go back through and see what happens. Competitive or not, if you're not a good fit, you likely won't be invited to that house--and this CAN be for the best.
I agree with what everyone else said about being 100% upfront and honest about why you depledged. Your sisters are there for you--I'm sorry that you felt you couldn't make arrangements with your previous chapter, but I hope things work out better for you the second time around. Let us know what you do!