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  #1  
Old 12-29-2000, 12:33 AM
exquizit exquizit is offline
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Question What do you think of this new generation of teens?

At work today I witnessed a 12 year old yell at her mom to "Shut Up!" and "Leave her alone!" Can you believe that? Back in the day, that child would be looking for their lips as well as their teeth!

Why do you think this is happening?

I think it's because these days parents focus more on being their child's friend more than their parent.

I believe in being open with children to the point where they trust you enough to come to you with whatever is going on with them, but I feel there should be a certain parental level of respect. Don't you?
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  #2  
Old 12-29-2000, 02:31 AM
Audacity44 Audacity44 is offline
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I couldn't agree more with you exquizit. My grandmother and I have the best relationship in the world, but I still have respect for her in that "motherly" way. Children these days are some little bolder than we are, but so are the parents..
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  #3  
Old 12-29-2000, 11:09 AM
ISU_XO ISU_XO is offline
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I think the kids today are also very spoiled. I work for a family and the kids are in 7th & 8th grade with cell phones, pagers and palm pilots. Am I too old or is that the norm for this new century? When they get whatever they want from their parents- they get a sense of control over them and disrepect them.
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  #4  
Old 12-29-2000, 11:32 AM
exquizit exquizit is offline
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I also feel very sorry for the teachers these days. Parents will uphold their brats in whatever they've done and want to jump the teacher for standing their ground! It's a sad sad thing.
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  #5  
Old 12-29-2000, 12:25 PM
Ideal08 Ideal08 is offline
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I think it's also that people are getting away from whooping their kids. I'm all about whoopins. We got them no matter where we were, store, school, playground, where ever. Now, people are afraid of having child services called on them. You have people in the grocery store watching how you hit your child and calling you an abuser. There is a distinct difference in a whoopin' and being child abused. My mother gave me the number to call child services when I was little. I was too scared to call though. And I agree about the parents trying to be friends with their kids. I think it all boils down to the fact that kids just aren't scared of their parents anymore. When I was little, my parents were like God to me. I honestly thought that my mother was capable of killing me (you know the speech, I brought you in this world....) All it takes is a little fear. But at the same time, I was always comfortable talking to her about anything. She could trust me.

As far as the kids with all the technology, I wonder if it's people making sure that their kids have what they couldn't have. Now, we all know that not all these kids are deserving of half of this stuff with the way they act and carry on. But I know a lot of my friends with kids don't want their child to be the one teased in school because they don't have this or they don't have that. I just don't understand the whole kids having pagers and cell phones. All yall are in school together!!! Who could possibly be paging and calling you? What a mess.....
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  #6  
Old 12-29-2000, 02:33 PM
Classy_Diva5 Classy_Diva5 is offline
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I think that nowadays, as people are having kids (whether they be 19 or 35 years in age), they all have the attitude of "I want to give what they didn't get". And that's fine-but make sure that your child has earned what they get-not everything that they want is a necessity. I know that in this day and age, we are advanced with technology and things like that (as it was mentioned before my post), but parents need to take the role as PARENT and decide on what to get for their children and not let society/"what my friends all have" be the judge. Just because your child's friend got a Playstation 2 does not mean that your child needs one as well. When I was coming up, I had to earn the things that I received-my mama always said "I gave you life-that was your right. Now the other things you want-that is a priviledge that you must earn."

Some parents are letting their child take the upper hand and call some of the shots-and as a result, today's teenagers are as wild as a female dog in heat (excuse the simile), and they end up on Ricki Lake/Maury crying about their situation. We need to bring back the old-school ways of parenting, the "Big Mama's" of the family, and the whuppins as well. Whuppins will be in full effect once I start having children .
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  #7  
Old 12-29-2000, 03:01 PM
nikki25 nikki25 is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by exquizit:

Why do you think this is happening?

I think it's because these days parents focus more on being their child's friend more than their parent.

I believe in being open with children to the point where they trust you enough to come to you with whatever is going on with them, but I feel there should be a certain parental level of respect. Don't you?

I think that you've answered your own question excellently.

I think that in this pluralistic society which is based on equitable treatment for everyone, that there has been an erosion of authority. For example, the law is not well respected nor is the Lord. Everyone is treated equally. We've bent the law to accomodate the equality premise. But, where does this end? Certainly, we'd still allow parents to have authority over their children. Not so.

A common citizen can ensure arrest of a parent whose language may be violent. If a parent strongly scolds, or spanks a child, DSS is called. Now, I'm not condoning abusive behavior, but surely, there has been a breakdown of authority in that sense. So where does that leave the parent. Ashamed to take authority of his/her own children! Truly, that is a shame.

So, now we have these parents unable to maintain authority in the home. Who's to blame? I think there are a multiple number of factors. But surely, a parent shouldn't walk around on needles for taking up the mantle of leadership and authority in HIS/HER own home! Nor should they lessen themselves to the level of "friend" to ensure that they can influence their child's behavior.

Parents need to stop selling their children short, and take authority. That doesn't mean that they admonish their kids in public--for that gives room for "tattle tell" adults to call DSS. They should take care of their family affairs in PRIVATE so that the children behave well publicly.

Nikki25 descends her soapbox.


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I will bless the Lord at ALL times His praise shall continually be in my mouth. (Psalms 34:1, KJV)
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  #8  
Old 12-29-2000, 03:20 PM
Wonderful1908 Wonderful1908 is offline
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Young people are simply young and what is irrational intolerable behavior to us may be a change of the times. Yelling at a parent or disrespecting someone though is not a sign of the times, thats a sign of no home training. If parents would take the time to really make sure they are raising there kids instead of "pretending" to raise them, alot of things would change. I am doing student teaching in the Spring and I am trying to prepare myself for these children! I went and did observatins at a private-Black high school and these kids were crazy. You would think someones parent is paying thousands of dollars for there child to go to school, so clearly they must have some parent that cares about there education....shouldn't they have some home training? Nope. I really worry that my nerves are not calm enough to do this high school teaching thing. Cause if somebodys child gets in my face and tells me to shut up.......lawd have mercy!
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  #9  
Old 12-29-2000, 05:29 PM
tickledpink tickledpink is offline
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I think too many parents fear beating their child in public because of all of the "child abuse" hype that is out there and some children feed off of this. In saying this, I don't mean to discount actual cases of child abuse, but disciplining your child is not a case. I remember the first time my son tested me in a grocery store in front of a police officer. Needless to say, I handled him right then & there (popped his little butt with a much louder reprimand @ home) and the cop just smiled, went on his merry way, and my son doesn't play with me in public like that any more.

I'm sorry, but I am not going to be afraid to discipline my children. The way that I see it is if you want them out of the criminal justice system, let me do my job as a parent. Plus, I love them too much to care about repercussions.
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  #10  
Old 12-29-2000, 07:22 PM
Convinced Convinced is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by exquizit:
I also feel very sorry for the teachers these days. Parents will uphold their brats in whatever they've done and want to jump the teacher for standing their ground! It's a sad sad thing.
Thank you for your sympathy! I teach approx. 100 tenth graders who don't know anything and don't care that they don't know. A teacher at my school recently was assaulted by a parent! She asked the mother to come in for a conference because the son had told her f*** you. The mother said that her son had a good heart, and it was the teacher's fault if she couldn't see it. When the teacher walked away, the mother grabbed her arm and pushed her against the wall. It makes me want to leave the classroom! (I'm in the process of trying to find a job at the State Dept. of Education, no kids!)
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  #11  
Old 12-29-2000, 07:50 PM
serenity_24 serenity_24 is offline
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Good luck to you Convinced on finding that new job, because I know how you feel.

I am not a teacher, but I was a substitute teacher for about 3 months. The pay was excellent, but you couln't pay me enough to do it again.

Today's kids are a product of todays younger parents. I think that's where it starts. Parents are too complacent with things that concern their kids. They don't inquire enough about their childrens lives. How many kids these days are inrolled in extracurricular activites. Parents also try to give the child what it takes to keep them quiet and off their nerves; be it candy, pagers, phones, or cars. And parents are more concerned with getting their hair and nails done (just to name a few) than with truly raising their kids.
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  #12  
Old 12-30-2000, 02:44 AM
Poplife Poplife is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by exquizit:
I think it's because these days parents focus more on being their child's friend more than their parent.

That's it in a nutshell. I have a friend who is 20 years old, making $7.50 an hour, and talking about how she wants to have her first child by the time she is 24 so she "won't be too old to do things with them." She says she wants to be young so she can be their "bestfriend."

DAG! It's one thing to coincidentally get pregnant before the age of 24, but to PLAN it before you even get your degree?? I can't say I understand that idea. She doesn't even have her own health insurance!! I guess it's because her mother is only 40 and statistically women who give birth to early tend to pass that occurrence on to their daughters.

My parents swim, see movies, play soccer, bicycle, and dance with my younger sis and they are both over 50!! *lol* She is well disciplined but still open and honest with them.

So much for needing youth to "do things" with your children.
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  #13  
Old 01-02-2001, 05:11 AM
truly inspired truly inspired is offline
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Really and truly, when I see some badass kids just acting rude and unruly with their parents I blame it all on the parents. Usually when you look close at the situation you will find that the parents are just as bad and oftentimes curse at their children. Instead of being an example, too many parents stoop down to their child's level when they try to discipline. I never would fathom actually coming out of my face as a child to insult my parent or even think about arguing with them or anyone else fo that matter in public. Children learn by example, their parents have the greatest influence on them.
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  #14  
Old 01-02-2001, 12:35 PM
PrincessELG PrincessELG is offline
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I to beleive that is all about how the child is raised. If your child is young and manipulating you and you are giving in then that is what will happen when they get older. You have to mold a child into the type of person you can respect later in life. If you are yelling and cursing at your child at the age of 2-4 then at the age of 10-12 that is all they know how to do. Life is all about balance and to much of anything especially if it is not deserved is not hurting anyone but that child.

My thoughts were a little scattered but you guys get what I mean...i hope
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  #15  
Old 01-02-2001, 05:37 PM
Catwoman Catwoman is offline
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Parents need to let their children know who is the parent and who is the child - from the get-go!!! I would have never tried to act a fool with my mom or dad - just out of pure respect for who they are and also for fear of losing my life!!! My nephew used to "fall out" when he didn't get his way...he would be on the floor arms and legs kicking and yelling. A few Christmas' ago...he tried that stunt right in the middle of my mom's livingroom...my sister(his mom) just looked at him and kept right on talking. Since this was my first time seeing him do this I was a little shocked. I yelled his name, leaned off the couch like I was going to snatch him up and looked at him like he lost the last bit of his mind....he looked at me and got up and sat down. He knew me as his aunt but not seeing me everyday he wasn't sure what I might do. I told my sister she better quit letting him act like that because it was only going to get worse...she said she just "let's him go" I told her it would only get worse. I don't condone(sp) beating kids but discipline must start early! Believe this or not (my husband didn't until he talked to my mom) I am 31 yrs old and have never got a beating/whipping/whatever. Not that I was some goody-goody...but I just knew better. I had respect and I feared the consequences of being "bad". I think if you teach a child from the beginning you will have less problems.
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