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  #1  
Old 07-13-2014, 11:22 PM
SoClassic SoClassic is offline
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May I have your thoughts?

Hello everyone! I've been lurking around GC for a little while now, probably about a year, and have finally decided to post something and hopefully get some helpful feedback!

I'll be attending a new university this fall after graduating with my AA from a small state college. I had originally planned on attending the branch campus of a very large/southern/well-known university in the next town over from me but have since changed my mind. The quality of the education there would have been amazing but the fact that it was a small branch campus made the student/campus life almost non-existent. Plus, the hour long drive and no on-campus living options make it a bit of a struggle in my eyes! I started to research the other, much bigger state university that's located a couple hours from me and really liked what I saw as far as academics, student life and campus activities are concerned. I made the decision to transfer there instead and I'm really excited for this new chapter in my life.

SO here's where I could the advice of all you lovely GCers! There's Greek Life at this university! The thought makes me extremely excited but extremely hesitant at the same time. I'm not sure what to do, so I'm coming to you for help.

I am not your typical PNM in several ways. First of all, I'm quite a bit older than the average girl going through recruitment. Compared to most girls, I'm probably considered ancient. The thought of being older than the other PNMs, as well as probably most everyone in any of the chapters, does not bother me. I've always been able to connect easily with people of all ages, both younger and older than me, and make friends with a variety of people. Secondly, I'm transferring in as a junior, not a freshman. And thirdly, my overall GPA is really not that impressive. You're probably all thinking that I may as well not even bother, but I'd like to explain and have your feedback, if you wouldn't mind?

I went to college straight after graduating high school with several scholarships and countless hours of community service under my belt. I grew up dancing competitively, competing in beauty pageants, horseback riding, sports ... You name it, I did it. I was originally going to attend a university out of town and rush with my friends, but my life circumstances changed very dramatically before that could happen. My mom was struggling pretty severely with her health and I was terrified of leaving town and not being there close to her so I ended up staying in town and attending the local community college. I attended for 4 semesters total - did GREAT for two and really struggled the other two. Between my mom's failing health and the emergence of my own health issues, I was just so stressed that I couldn't focus. I wound up dropping out halfway through my 4th semester to get the help that I desperately needed but unfortunately, I racked up a few Fs and Ws before that. My GPA suffered as you can probably imagine. Fast forward a few months and I was out of treatment, healthy and glowing and ready to take on the world again! Or so I thought. Long story short, I ended up taking several YEARS off school to "get healthy" and all that. During this time, I moved several states away to live with some relatives near the beach. The family thought it would be good for me to get away and see something besides the town I grew up in and they were right! I haven't even considered going home in the years that I've been here and I absolutely think that taking time off school for myself was the best thing that I could have done. Don't worry, my mom is doing GREAT these days.

So ^that really worries me when I think about going through recruitment. I went back to school and completed my AA this past May and have made excellent grades and have been super focused. My GPA this last semester was a 3.7, which I am quite proud of. However, even as well as I've done lately, it can't erase the past! My overall GPA from when I first started college to now is a little disappointing. I've done my best and have worked extremely hard to pull it up. I just wonder if it's going to be enough?

I grew up always thinking that joining a sorority would be something I would do, along with my friends. Obviously, I didn't have that opportunity before and I honestly didn't think I ever would again. All of the sudden, there's an opportunity knocking and I really want to open the door! I'm so cheesy, I know, but seriously! The school I'll be attending has a very small Greek presence on campus. I believe there are just 4 chapters. If this school was a huge southern school, I wouldn't even dream of rushing. I'm sure I wouldn't have a chance and that's okay! But I really feel like giving it a shot here.

For what it's worth, I do have a couple of recs to two of the chapters and am working on the other two. I have been doing some volunteer work and community service over the last few years as well. I feel like I have a likeabe personality and like I said before, I make friends and connections relatively easily and am fairly outgoing when it's appropriate. I feel like I at least owe it to myself to TRY and go through recruitment, even though I have some things stacked against me. If I don't do it, I'll never know right?! I so badly want the "full university experience" and to make the most out of my remaining years. I know for many girls, Greek life is a huge part of that and it's the same for me! I've watched my cousins and friends experience the joys of sisterhood and everything that comes with it and I want it so bad!

Sorry, I know this is really long! Thanks for reading to the end and thanks in advance for any advice you have to give. I don't mind honesty for sure, please don't just tell me what you think I want to hear. I know that rushing at my age and with my past is out of the ordinary.

Am I completely out of my mind or do you think I ought to give it a shot?
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  #2  
Old 07-14-2014, 12:09 AM
thetalady thetalady is offline
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How old do you mean when you say "quite a bit older"?
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  #3  
Old 07-14-2014, 12:23 AM
AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SoClassic View Post
Hello everyone! I've been lurking around GC for a little while now, probably about a year, and have finally decided to post something and hopefully get some helpful feedback!

I'll be attending a new university this fall after graduating with my AA from a small state college. I had originally planned on attending the branch campus of a very large/southern/well-known university in the next town over from me but have since changed my mind. The quality of the education there would have been amazing but the fact that it was a small branch campus made the student/campus life almost non-existent. Plus, the hour long drive and no on-campus living options make it a bit of a struggle in my eyes! I started to research the other, much bigger state university that's located a couple hours from me and really liked what I saw as far as academics, student life and campus activities are concerned. I made the decision to transfer there instead and I'm really excited for this new chapter in my life.

SO here's where I could the advice of all you lovely GCers! There's Greek Life at this university! The thought makes me extremely excited but extremely hesitant at the same time. I'm not sure what to do, so I'm coming to you for help.

I am not your typical PNM in several ways. First of all, I'm quite a bit older than the average girl going through recruitment. Compared to most girls, I'm probably considered ancient. The thought of being older than the other PNMs, as well as probably most everyone in any of the chapters, does not bother me. I've always been able to connect easily with people of all ages, both younger and older than me, and make friends with a variety of people. Secondly, I'm transferring in as a junior, not a freshman. And thirdly, my overall GPA is really not that impressive. You're probably all thinking that I may as well not even bother, but I'd like to explain and have your feedback, if you wouldn't mind?

I went to college straight after graduating high school with several scholarships and countless hours of community service under my belt. I grew up dancing competitively, competing in beauty pageants, horseback riding, sports ... You name it, I did it. I was originally going to attend a university out of town and rush with my friends, but my life circumstances changed very dramatically before that could happen. My mom was struggling pretty severely with her health and I was terrified of leaving town and not being there close to her so I ended up staying in town and attending the local community college. I attended for 4 semesters total - did GREAT for two and really struggled the other two. Between my mom's failing health and the emergence of my own health issues, I was just so stressed that I couldn't focus. I wound up dropping out halfway through my 4th semester to get the help that I desperately needed but unfortunately, I racked up a few Fs and Ws before that. My GPA suffered as you can probably imagine. Fast forward a few months and I was out of treatment, healthy and glowing and ready to take on the world again! Or so I thought. Long story short, I ended up taking several YEARS off school to "get healthy" and all that. During this time, I moved several states away to live with some relatives near the beach. The family thought it would be good for me to get away and see something besides the town I grew up in and they were right! I haven't even considered going home in the years that I've been here and I absolutely think that taking time off school for myself was the best thing that I could have done. Don't worry, my mom is doing GREAT these days.

So ^that really worries me when I think about going through recruitment. I went back to school and completed my AA this past May and have made excellent grades and have been super focused. My GPA this last semester was a 3.7, which I am quite proud of. However, even as well as I've done lately, it can't erase the past! My overall GPA from when I first started college to now is a little disappointing. I've done my best and have worked extremely hard to pull it up. I just wonder if it's going to be enough?

I grew up always thinking that joining a sorority would be something I would do, along with my friends. Obviously, I didn't have that opportunity before and I honestly didn't think I ever would again. All of the sudden, there's an opportunity knocking and I really want to open the door! I'm so cheesy, I know, but seriously! The school I'll be attending has a very small Greek presence on campus. I believe there are just 4 chapters. If this school was a huge southern school, I wouldn't even dream of rushing. I'm sure I wouldn't have a chance and that's okay! But I really feel like giving it a shot here.

For what it's worth, I do have a couple of recs to two of the chapters and am working on the other two. I have been doing some volunteer work and community service over the last few years as well. I feel like I have a likeabe personality and like I said before, I make friends and connections relatively easily and am fairly outgoing when it's appropriate. I feel like I at least owe it to myself to TRY and go through recruitment, even though I have some things stacked against me. If I don't do it, I'll never know right?! I so badly want the "full university experience" and to make the most out of my remaining years. I know for many girls, Greek life is a huge part of that and it's the same for me! I've watched my cousins and friends experience the joys of sisterhood and everything that comes with it and I want it so bad!

Sorry, I know this is really long! Thanks for reading to the end and thanks in advance for any advice you have to give. I don't mind honesty for sure, please don't just tell me what you think I want to hear. I know that rushing at my age and with my past is out of the ordinary.

Am I completely out of my mind or do you think I ought to give it a shot?
tl/dr

GPA plus class standing plus age may yield a lack of invitations after open house round. But you won't know unless you try.
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  #4  
Old 07-14-2014, 12:34 AM
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IndianaSigKap IndianaSigKap is offline
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Much of this depends on the school itself. Without revealing any information about the school on this thread, think through the following questions. 1.) When you have been on campus, have you seen other non-traditional students on this campus? 2.) As far as Greek life goes, do the chapters have houses? And do all of the women live in? 3.) Are the chapters diverse socially, ethnically, personality-wise?

Within two hours drive of me, there are 4 campuses with Greek life. One is very competitive and traditional, sophomores often have difficult recruitments. Another is a small private college with only one chapter with no dwelling. The third is a large campus with a small Greek system. They do bid quality upperclassmen who do transfer to campus.The fourth is a small commuter school with a handful of chapters without houses. They often bid non-traditional students. It's not uncommon to have a new member or two who are already 21.

So your situation largely depends on the campus you will be attending. Best wishes to you!
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  #5  
Old 07-14-2014, 12:39 AM
33girl 33girl is offline
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Do you know anyone at this school who's a member of a sorority or a fraternity?

What on earth state university in the South has only 4 sorority chapters? (For that matter, what on earth state university ANYWHERE has only 4 sorority chapters) If you mean "public university" then word it as such.
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  #6  
Old 07-14-2014, 12:53 AM
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IndianaSigKap IndianaSigKap is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl View Post
Do you know anyone at this school who's a member of a sorority or a fraternity?

What on earth state university in the South has only 4 sorority chapters? (For that matter, what on earth state university ANYWHERE has only 4 sorority chapters) If you mean "public university" then word it as such.
I can think of two off the top of my head in just Alabama alone and I don't know the south all that well.
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  #7  
Old 07-14-2014, 01:07 AM
33girl 33girl is offline
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It's just when someone says a "state university" I think flagship (i.e. Alabama, LSU etc). Tomato - tomahto.
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  #8  
Old 07-14-2014, 08:09 AM
SoClassic SoClassic is offline
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Thanks for the replies! Yes, to clarify I suppose I mean "public" university, not STATE university. This school has a student body of about 13,000 - so not huge but not tiny either. Upon further research, I've discovered that there are actually five chapters on this campus. As for location, I'm not technically considered "Deep South," but close enough to the border of another state that we might as well be! The big schools in my state are known for having competitive recruitments.

I've been looking on the websites and social media platforms to look at photos and get a feel for the girls. Yes, I have seen a LOT of diversity, which is awesome! There are women of color in every chapter and many that don't seem to fit the typical sorority girl "look." If there truly is such a thing, I feel like I look more like your typical sorority girl than many of the girls I've seen in photos. As for my age ... I just turned 25. I'll graduate at 27 if all goes according to plan. However, I do not and have not ever "looked" my age. People will ask and seem utterly shocked when I tell them and exclaim that they were SURE I was in the 20-21 range and can't quite believe my actual age. Which is great for me in a lot of ways I guess! So as far as "looking the part" and fitting in with the sisters if I were to receive a bid, I'm honestly not worried about that. And I know many people caution older PNMs about Greek life and ask that they consider the parties and social atmosphere and whether that is an atmosphere they could see themselves in/whether they are in different stages of life, etc .... and I'm totally great with that part too. Like I said in my OP, because of my health issues and family situation, I honestly didn't get to "experience" college like most kids do right out of HS. I've never been a huge partier when it comes to drinking but I definitely love to have a good time and this part of Greek life is appealing to me. In fact, ALL parts are appealing to me.

There are no houses on campus, just dorm floors and suites I think. I would be living off campus about 2 minutes away in my own apartment. Maybe this is worth mentioning too - one of the chapters is a new colony and is participating in formal for the first time this fall. This is also one of the chapters to which I have a rec.
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  #9  
Old 07-14-2014, 08:10 AM
pinksequins pinksequins is offline
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I too thought flagship since the OP stated she had decided against the branch campus. Without identifying the school, success will futn on the criteria SK cited above.
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  #10  
Old 07-14-2014, 08:18 AM
KDCat KDCat is offline
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Originally Posted by 33girl View Post
It's just when someone says a "state university" I think flagship (i.e. Alabama, LSU etc). Tomato - tomahto.
When I hear "state university," I think the opposite of flagship. "State university" = schools like Illinois State, Alabama State, Eastern Illinois University, Southern Missouri State.

But agreed -- if the campus Greek culture is laid back, OP could get a bid from a group. In many places, it's going to be tough, but she won't know until she tries.
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  #11  
Old 07-14-2014, 08:30 AM
SoClassic SoClassic is offline
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Originally Posted by KDCat View Post
When I hear "state university," I think the opposite of flagship. "State university" = schools like Illinois State, Alabama State, Eastern Illinois University, Southern Missouri State.

But agreed -- if the campus Greek culture is laid back, OP could get a bid from a group. In many places, it's going to be tough, but she won't know until she tries.
From what I can see, it is pretty laid back. The university itself is an anchor of the city, so it is largely a commuter university and they have a lot of non-trad students on campus. I am pretty good friends with one girl in one of the chapters and she did say that it was "pretty competitive" but that my age didn't matter, lots of older girls rushed, and she is encouraging me to try - which I'm HOPING means that someone like me would be welcome in her chapter.

Last edited by SoClassic; 07-14-2014 at 08:34 AM.
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  #12  
Old 07-14-2014, 08:53 AM
FSUZeta FSUZeta is offline
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Could it be that she is just being polite and doesn't want to hurt your feelings?
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Old 07-14-2014, 09:28 AM
SoClassic SoClassic is offline
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Could it be that she is just being polite and doesn't want to hurt your feelings?
Oh that's very possible! We aren't best friends by far and maybe not good enough friends that she would have said anything else. I'd like to think not, but you never know. This particular girl, I have learned, is also a counselor this year, and still encouraging me to go for it. I haven't spoken to her since finding this out of course.
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Old 07-14-2014, 09:41 AM
irishpipes irishpipes is offline
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I'll be honest, no matter the culture of the school, I think 25 is too old. You will be bossed around by 19 year olds, and by the time you graduate, you will be almost 10 years older than the average PNM.
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Old 07-14-2014, 10:28 AM
SoClassic SoClassic is offline
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I'll be honest, no matter the culture of the school, I think 25 is too old. You will be bossed around by 19 year olds, and by the time you graduate, you will be almost 10 years older than the average PNM.
Do you think my age will bother the girls? Because it doesn't bother me one bit. I don't really see it as someone who is "younger" than me "bossing" me around. I have no problem respecting authority, and that's what it is to me - a group where some members have more authority than others, and their authority is earned. I can't say with absolute certainty since I haven't been in a sorority before, but I just can't see this being a problem for me at all. I've been in other situations (school, work, extracurricular) where there have been people younger than me in places of authority over me and it has never once phased me. That's life, ya know? I can respect someone's authority no matter what their age is .
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