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  #1  
Old 05-06-2012, 05:23 PM
greeknewbie greeknewbie is offline
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Rushing with an Open Mind (a belated Spring 2012 recruitment story)

So I know we’re in kind of a lull between recruitment seasons and found my recruitment notebook as I was packing things up to move out for the summer so I figured I would write this to de-stress between studying for finals and packing. I’m a longtime lurker on the forum, and I do have another account, but I very rarely post.

I’m a rising sophomore at a medium-sized university. The greek scene here is about 25% of the undergrad population, but I didn’t see it that much first semester prior to rushing (we practice winter/delayed recruitment) aside from occasional large philanthropy events that were highly publicized. We have seven sororities, and the number of women going through recruitment has been steadily increasing over the last couple of years, and this year was an all-time high. Our recruitment happens in three rounds: open-house days, skit day, and then preferences day.

***I would like to ask if you know which school I attend to please not post it. Thank you!!***

I signed up for recruitment very last minute, so I wasn’t very gung-ho about going greek. At the time, I didn’t know anyone in my family was greek, though I later found out my grandfather was in a fraternity way back when. And like I said, I didn’t actively know or research our greek life in any way prior to going through recruitment, but I had heard some minor things about all of them.

I love reading fashion magazines, and I keep finding them around my room in weird places as I clean, so I’m going to use their names as aliases for our sororities.

Elle and Marie Claire were the only ones I had heard continuously good things about. I did not personally know anyone in either sorority, but no one had said one bad thing about them, in comparison to others.

Nylons were the school’s party girls.

InStyle were the new girls on campus and had a reputation for being a little weirder and most open to taking everyone.

Vogue girls were blonde. A girl I knew and intensely disliked had made it very clear to everyone around her that she was going to be a Vogue because she is a legacy.

Glamour is known as the Jewish house, even though my campus tends to be very Jewish so that's not saying very much. A family friend who I’d spoken to a couple of times is a member of this chapter.

I hadn’t heard anything about Harper’s Bazaar. At all. Which I didn’t know if it was a good thing or bad thing.

We recruit right after winter break, so we got back, unpacked, and then met up with our gamma chi groups to get dinner. We’d all gotten together once prior to leaving for winter break, and I was lucky to be in a group with two of my really good friends. Our gamma chis basically just told us not to worry about anything and get a good night’s sleep because we had busy days ahead. My roommate was also going through recruitment as well so we tried not to freak out and got some shut eye.

Last edited by greeknewbie; 05-06-2012 at 05:38 PM.
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Old 05-06-2012, 05:27 PM
greeknewbie greeknewbie is offline
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ROUND ONE:

Round one was split into two days, where we would go to four parties the first day and three the second day. My group was assigned to the morning slot, so we all showed up relatively early in our jeans and plain t-shirts, ready to go. I’m not going to lie, I’m from the northeast, and while I tend to identify as a girly-girl and, like I mentioned, I love fashion, I am extremely low-maintenance. I do my hair every day because I have to, but putting on make-up in the morning it not my top priority (that would be sleep, which I never seem to get enough of in college). But I managed to get myself up with enough time to put on some minimal make-up and enough to make me not look like the walking dead (zombies tend to not get bids, from what I’d gathered.

All the groups that were going to go were brought to a large room where we lined up in alphabetical order in front of the sign with what sorority we were going to be visiting. All the gamma chis who were not currently with their groups sang the rush cheer of each group as we filed out to head to the parties.

We were not warned what was going to happen at any of these parties. Which is why I nearly jumped out of my skin when we entered the lobby outside the first party and all of the sudden the doors looked like they were going to be pounded off their hinges and hundreds of girls were screaming their cheers at us and I was definitely freaked out. Greek life is not big at all where I come from, so I had no idea what I was getting myself into. But at that point, it was obviously too late to back out of whatever insanity I was about to enter, so we all got into our nice little alphabetical line again and prepared for whatever was behind door number one.

Marie Claire was my first party, and I was taken by the arm (rather forcefully, to my surprise) and led to a small table to sit with another girl and her rusher. The room was beautifully and elegantly decorated, very much like I imagined a sorority would be decorated, and they even had napkins with their name on it was I thought was adorable. I was rushed by five girls in rotation, and I honestly had a great conversation with every single one. They were all funny and sweet and some of them shared my same interests while other girls were just very easy to talk to. All of our conversations were unique and funny and I wasn’t uncomfortable at all (though the fact that I just love talking to and meeting new people probably helped once I got over the initial nervousness). Their philanthropy hit close to home and really meant a lot to me, and their song (lyrics of a popular song changed to reflect their chapter) was really funny. I genuinely loved this house.

Vogue was my next party. Like I had said earlier, I knew a girl who was a Vogue legacy and I have my own reasons for intensely disliking her, so I was unsure about this house coming into it. Unfortunately, my fears were pretty much confirmed. While the girls I spoke to were fine, they definitely came off as being very fake (though not all were blonde). I also glanced around the room during their presentation on the chapter and spotted a girl who I spoken to just before the presentation talking to another girl on the side of the room and making what I think she thought was a subtle gesture in my direction and I just kind of got that feeling that they were already talking about me, which I found very off-putting. I left knowing I was going to rank this way at the bottom. I was only rushed by about three or four girls (my notes aren’t very clear, I think I only paid close attention to my rushers the first time because I was looking for a tangible thing to latch onto in the middle of all the madness!). Their philanthropy was nice, but didn’t hit home the same way the other’s did. And their theme and decorations were fine, but maybe a little overdone. Also, it involved food, and having just eaten breakfast, did not appeal to me at all.

After that was Nylon. At this point, I was much more used to the waiting outside the door routine, but these girls were insane. You could see the hinges straining and the glass on the door looked like it was about to pop out. I feel like they might have let us in a little quicker just because they were worried about what would have happened if they hadn’t. I had amazing conversations here, and they were all really quirky and weird and they definitely didn’t fit my preconceived notion of the “party girls”, which was really nice. I realized an upperclassman I knew from residential life was in the chapter, I mentioned her and it turns out a couple of others had mentioned knowing her in the same capacity. The video they showed was absolutely adorable and everyone seemed like they had an amazing time filming it and spending time with each other. Their philanthropy also was fine, but nothing extremely special to me. They didn’t have a theme though, or if they did I didn’t write it down and can’t remember it. I had a really good time here and left knowing it was going to be high on my rankings.

Glamour was my last party of the day and I was getting pretty tired at this point (though it was barely lunch time, which was weird). There is a certain stereotype associated with this chapter that I’m not going to say because it would likely reveal the actual sorority and I don’t want to bash anyone for things they can’t control. Turns out the girl I knew through family was not at recruitment because she was studying abroad, because I asked after her, but they were excited I knew her and she seemed to be genuinely well-liked among her sisters. However, I really didn’t feel any real connection with any of the girls, and during their video presentation one girl continually cat-called the sisters who showed up during it and was just being extremely loud and talkative when us PNMs were desperately trying to listen because we really wanted to hear what they were talking about. So it was really off-putting. While I liked it better than Vogue, I knew it would probably go closer to the bottom of my rankings.

At the end of that party, we were sent home to hang out and relax before the next day while the afternoon groups went to their three parties. Of course, some tent-talking happened. Among my friend group, it was universally acknowledged that Nylon and Harper’s Bazaar had been favorites, and while I had loved Marie Claire, some of my friends had gotten weird vibes there and it was sad to hear that, because I really had loved them. I honestly can’t remember what was said about the other houses at that point.

Day two and we were up bright and early again! I was a lot more comfortable going into the second day, My friends and I got dressed, swung by the dining hall to grab some breakfast, and then headed over to the meeting place. Things seemed to be going smoother today, as smooth as they could be anyways, and we were ushered to our first party.

InStyle was the first one I visited that day. They were extremely new to campus and had only been through a few years of recruitment. It turns out that someone I knew from one of my extracurriculars was a member of this sorority, though I did not know it at the time. It’s probably really bad, but my first thing I have written down is that their shirts were an odd color, like a really dark green I think, and it seemed kind of gloomy compared to the brighter or generally accepted “pretty” colors of all the other sororities I had seen before. They were all very sweet, though one was a little socially awkward for my tastes and I did not have a very good conversation with her. Their presentation emphasized their sisterhood despite being new, and also about winning at other GLOs events, which I thought was a little weird but I guess it was a point of pride. I liked them, but didn’t have any overwhelming feelings of “I could see myself here” as I did at other places.

After that we were shepherded to Harper’s Bazaar. I had a problem: I fell completely and overwhelmingly in love with this chapter. The three girls I spoke to where phenomenal: silly and funny and I felt like I was talking to my best friend’s from home. I was basically doubled over laughing the entire time I was in this party and I had seriously felt that I had found my home. All of my close friends from home had stayed on the east coast, so I was amazed that these girls were so similar to them in the best way possible. I had heard of their philanthropy, which was great, and their presentation as well was probably the funniest thing I had ever seen. They had a sort of mini-skit for it, and all of us were cracking up the entire time. A TA from one of my first-semester classes was in this sorority and stopped by to say hello and tell me she was happy to see me going through recruitment. It could not have possibly been any better. I knew that was going to be my number one.

I only had one sorority left to visit, and that was ELLE. I also really enjoyed this chapter. I spoke to a bunch of awesome girls, including one who shared my major (which is kind of unique) so we had a lot of fun talking about it and she was giving me advice for which classes to take for it. We also shared a really funny experience with some of the squirrels on campus (who are insane) and that was how she transitioned me to my next rusher, which left us both in hysterics. I knew a fair amount about their philanthropy, because it’s pretty well known around the country. At this point I was just so tired from everything and it was nice to finally be escorted out and head over to the original meeting room to do our rankings. We could attend up to five parties the next day so you had to rank two as your bottom. While the order of the ones you were ranking as #1 didn't really matter, I ranked mine in my order of preference.

My final rankings were:

1. Harper’s Bazaar
1. Nylon
1. Marie Claire
1. Elle
1. Instyle
2. Glamour
3. Vogue

And then it was back to my room to relax and wait for the next day of events to come.

Last edited by greeknewbie; 05-06-2012 at 05:49 PM.
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  #3  
Old 05-06-2012, 05:30 PM
greeknewbie greeknewbie is offline
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ROUND TWO:

I arrived at our meeting room, and was given a schedule for my day. I’m not going to lie, I wanted to cry when I saw that both Harper’s Bazaar and Nylon had cut me. I thought things had gone really well at both parties, so to think that they would cut me meant I had done something wrong? Maybe? I wasn’t sure. But I was also really lucky: I’m not someone who has always had a good time getting to know people, especially on a first-impressions basis like it seemed like recruitment was, so to think that I had a full schedule (all five other sororities had wanted to see me again) was definitely something that made me feel a little bit better. Some of my friends had gotten full schedules, some had been cut by one or two, and there were a fair amount of people who for some reason had only been invited back to one house. It was heartbreaking to see how upset those girls were, but most of them pulled themselves back together and promised to continue to go through recruitment. A few did, however, drop today after only getting invited back to one or two that they felt they would not like and by dropping out, were eligible for fall informal recruitment or rerush again in the following spring.

I don’t have my actual schedule, and I’m pretty sure I had a break at some point because I had the first and last slots for parties, but I do have the order I went in.

Vogue was first, much to my initial disappointment. I was extremely surprised to see this house on my schedule, because I had not had a good time at that party and thought the feeling was mutual. However, they completely changed my mind today. Their theme was beautiful and their skit was extremely well-done and very fun. I only spoke to two girls today, and they were both really easy to talk to and I totally enjoyed myself. Also, the one girl who I did have a good conversation with the first day made a point to stop by and give me a hug and say she was happy to see me back. I left knowing that this house was going to move way up in my rankings at the end of the day.

Up next was Marie Claire, and I was excited to be back. This had been my favorite of all the houses I had been invited back to, so I was really happy to be there. I know I commented a lot on the decorations the day before, and they continued with their classiness today. However, the first two girls I spoke to, the conversations were very awkward and stilted and I was not having nearly as good of a time as I did the first day. The skit was kind of sloppy compared to the one I had just seen, but they were obviously having a good time doing it. The third girl I spoke to, who had just been in the skit, totally saved the day from me. I felt an instant connection to her and was genuinely sorry to have to stop talking to her when we had to leave. They were probably going to move down in my rankings, but luckily the last girl had made it totally worthwhile.

InStyle came next, and their party was fine but nothing special. I didn’t have a crazy connection to the girls I spoke to, and while their skit was adorable it wasn’t anything exciting or new. I really just don’t have a lot to say about this chapter, sorry (though you might like it after my excessive descriptions of others, I wrote a lot in my recruitment book and I tend to have a pretty good memory).

After InStyle came Glamour. This party was very memorable because one, it was in a very dark room and two, we stood up the entire time instead of sitting like at other parties (though now that I think about it, Vogue had everyone stand too). But it was just pairs standing around the room, so it was kind of weird. Their skit was a total and complete mess, but they were silly and definitely having fun, though I have the feeling they did not volunteer to be in it and therefore were a lot less into it than other girls at other chapters. I absolutely loved one of the girls I spoke to, and we had a really good time talking about shared backgrounds. I was sorry to leave our conversation as well.

Last but certainly not least was ELLE. Their room blew me away. It was so intricately decorated and it was obvious that they had spent a ton of time making sure the room was gorgeous and each table had a unique setting that still went with the overall theme. I spoke to a few girls, one of who shared my love for theatre, and had to actually leave in the middle of our conversation to go perform in their skit. And their skit was incredible. It was by far the best I had seen yet and they were all extremely talented, plus you could tell how much each girl had wanted to be in the skit and loved performing in it. I left and knew that I would be ranking it as my number one.

For preferences day, we could attend up to three parties. After a lot of hemming and hawing, I eventually decided to rank:

1. ELLE
1. Marie Claire
1. Vogue
2. Glamour
3. InStyle

I ended up doing this because I had really liked Vogue that day and was confused by how different my opinions of them had been. So I decided that I would rank them third because I wanted to give them another chance to give me a chance so I could make an educated final decision. What rush was teaching me so far was that you really couldn’t just rely on first impressions, and that recruitment was an incredibly crazy experience. I went to bed hoping that things were going to work out the next day.
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Old 05-06-2012, 05:33 PM
greeknewbie greeknewbie is offline
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ROUND THREE:

When I arrived at the meeting place for preferences day, I was once again extremely blessed to have a full schedule. ELLE, Marie Claire, and Glamour had cordially invited me back to their preferences parties. I wasn’t too sad to see the loss of Vogue, because it just meant that that house was not for me. I’d been trying to go through the recruitment process with the idea of “you’ll end up where you’re meant to be”, which is also how I went through my college application process. That had worked out wonderfully, so now I was hoping the same would happen here.

Glamour was up first. You could tell today was going to be more serious because, rather than cheering our arrival, the sisters were serenading us as we were led in. I was picked up by the girl I loved from the previous day and was so excited to see her again. We had a genuine conversation, just about our lives (including our dogs, which was a huge bonding point because I consider my dog like my child). She was the only person I spoke to at that party, which meant a lot, mostly because to me it meant that she had seriously just wanted to talk to me, and it made me honestly feel really special. The actual preferences ceremony was beautiful, some letters were read to seniors, some songs were sung, and then I signed their preferences book to show I had attended the ceremony and did a smaller ritual with the girl who preffed me. I left with a really great feeling, knowing I could totally picture myself in this sorority if every girl was like this one.

Marie Claire came after, and I was picked up once again by the girl I had loved the day before. The sisters were all dressed in really unique outfits, but they went with the theme of their sorority so it wasn’t weird it was honestly quite beautiful. The first girl and I were having a really good conversation, and two girls who I had spoken to during the first round came to tell me how happy they were that I was back for preferences and they had been looking forward to seeing me again. One of those girls then took the place of my first rusher to show me some photos about her life so far in the sorority and how much it meant to her. They were so sweet, and you could tell that she truly loved her sisters, her pledge family, and everything about her experience in Greek Life. She was also the one who led me through the preferences ceremony. A senior spoke about how the sorority had been there for her, in good times and bad, and then we were shown photos about the sorority as they all sang a song about choosing their sorority. I’m probably not doing this ceremony enough justice, because it was beautiful. I was nearly in tears by the end of it (one of the two who were getting super emotional) and just had that moment like the one I had when I was college hunting: I knew I had found my home. When I left this party, the girl who had just preffed me hugged me goodbye and I hugged her back because I just didn’t want to let go.

But I still had one more party to attend, which was ELLE. This had been my number one choice the day before, so I was interested to see how it would compare to the extremely emotional experience I had just had. I was completely surprised to be picked up by a girl I did not remember at all, and whom I could tell right from the start I had no connection with. She asked me if I had any questions about the sorority, and past that didn’t really have anything to say. It was so completely awkward, I had no idea what to do. My first two preference parties had been so wonderful that I was just confused as to how a chapter I had loved the two days had suddenly become one where I felt extremely uncomfortable in. I spoke to one other girl, but she didn’t really leave an impression on me. For the actual ceremony, the sisters took turns reading part of their sorority’s creed, and while the words themselves were beautiful, I had no connection to them either. While I knew that this house would end up with a wonderful group of people, I knew in my heart that it wasn’t for me.

As soon as I got back to the meeting area, I ran to one of my gamma chis because I wanted to do my rankings before I started questioning my feelings. She was a little surprised, because I was definitely someone who had needed to talk things out in previous days, but as soon as she had finished talking to the girl she was working with, let me come over again to do my rankings.

My final card went:

1. Marie Claire
2. Glamour
3. ELLE

And then it was time to go back to my room and freak out.
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Old 05-06-2012, 05:35 PM
DeltaBetaBaby DeltaBetaBaby is offline
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Originally Posted by greeknewbie View Post

Glamour catered to a very specific kind of girl. A family friend who I’d spoken to a couple of times is a member of this chapter.
Just say that it is the Jewish house!!! Nobody here was born yesterday.
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Old 05-06-2012, 05:35 PM
greeknewbie greeknewbie is offline
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BID DAY

I woke up extremely early from a dream where the only thing I could remember was people singing the ELLE song and I was getting extremely anxious. Had I messed up at Marie Claire somehow, and then at Glamour? I was sure I was going to be happy and lucky to be invited to be a member of any of the houses I had preffed at, but I had been so sure that Marie Claire and I were meant for each other that the thought that they could have not felt the same way was really painful. Luckily, I didn’t get a call to let me know that I had not received a bid, so I waited anxiously for my gamma chis to come around and give me my bid. I basically spent the entire morning pacing my room and watching from my window as girls in gamma chi jackets walked all around the dorms with bags of different colors representing each sorority. I couldn’t figure out which one was for Marie Claire, but one of the ones I had narrowed it down to was still in my gamma chis’ hands as I finally spotted them from my window heading towards my dorm room.

At this point, I was freaking out. But I didn’t have to wait much longer. A lot of girls in my building were in my gamma chi group, but they moved quickly. I finally heard a knock on my door and opened it to find my gamma chis there waiting for me. And when they started cheering the sorority’s song, I started grinning uncontrollably. They handed me my bag and bid card, which I had to refrain from ripping open.

I was invited to become a new member at Marie Claire!





On a shield of white…




An anchor bright…



For every girl that pledges right...


There'll be nothing but DEEGEE for the one that I love!


I was a proud new member of Delta Gamma!

Turns out my gamma chis were members of Nylon and Glamour respectively (neither of which I guessed) and two of my really good friends here also went DG with me. I ended up knowing a lot of my pledge class tangentially, but I love them all to pieces now and we’re incredibly close.

As I finish up my first semester as a member of my sorority, I could not be happier. DG has filled a hole in my life I didn’t realize I had. These are some of the most amazing women I have met in my entire life, and they have definitely helped change me for the better. I’m looking so forward to recruitment next year so I can show all those people who were just like me, especially those who are unsure if greek life is for them, that Greek Life is honestly nothing like the movies. Sure, there are mixers and formals and whatever, but there’s so much more. There’s a philanthropy that I love to do service for. A pledge family I love. And girls who I know would have my back no matter what.

So to anyone that reads this as a PNM: keep an open mind and an open heart. You’d be surprised how much your opinions change throughout recruitment, and how much Greek life can change you for the better. Looking back, I don’t know what I would do without my sisters. They are the best part of my college experience so far, and I honestly wish everyone the best on their future recruitments, on both sides of the equation. You’ll end up where you are meant to be, trust in the system. Because in all honesty, at least in my experience, it works. It really does.

Last edited by greeknewbie; 05-06-2012 at 05:38 PM.
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Old 05-06-2012, 05:37 PM
greeknewbie greeknewbie is offline
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Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby View Post
Just say that it is the Jewish house!!! Nobody here was born yesterday.
Apologies, I tend to be a very PC person and am actually Jewish myself, but I really didn't want to define the house by how it is historically (there are plenty of non-Jews in the chapter, actually, or at least in this pledge class). I'll change it if people don't object to it!
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Old 05-06-2012, 06:26 PM
Old_Row Old_Row is offline
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Just say that it is the Jewish house!!! Nobody here was born yesterday.
Agreed! All the dancing around it just gets annoying because it's so obvious to anyone with half a brain.
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Old 05-06-2012, 07:56 PM
DubaiSis DubaiSis is offline
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The thing is, dancing around it makes it sound like it's a PROBLEM that it's the Jewish house. You make less of an issue of it if you just say that's what makes them unusual or special.

Congratulations on joining DG!
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Old 05-06-2012, 09:13 PM
greeknewbie greeknewbie is offline
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I understand completely. I guess my line of thinking was just that I know that other people have preconceived notions of how it is if I say right off the bat that it's a historically Jewish house, when in reality it could be (and is) very different. But now that you guys say it I totally see it the way you see it.

Sorry if I offended anyone who is a member of a Jewish sorority! I promise I did not mean to
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Old 05-06-2012, 09:32 PM
DeltaBetaBaby DeltaBetaBaby is offline
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Originally Posted by greeknewbie View Post
I understand completely. I guess my line of thinking was just that I know that other people have preconceived notions of how it is if I say right off the bat that it's a historically Jewish house, when in reality it could be (and is) very different. But now that you guys say it I totally see it the way you see it.

Sorry if I offended anyone who is a member of a Jewish sorority! I promise I did not mean to
No, we're just picking on you because it's something we see ALL of the time. Don't worry about it, nobody is really offended, and we are glad you shared your story.
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Old 05-06-2012, 10:51 PM
DubaiSis DubaiSis is offline
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If you read back over several recruitment threads, you'll see lots of mentions of that house that makes it different. If you put your benign comment in the context of the 100 others out there, I think you'll get a better picture. No harm done and it doesn't sound like on your campus being that house is a big problem. Sometimes we make comments, not so much to the OP, but to the reader or the next girl who's going to write her recruitment thread. The euphemisms can get a little silly.
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Old 05-06-2012, 11:07 PM
Sciencewoman Sciencewoman is offline
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Congratulations on joining Delta Gamma! It sounds like you've had a great first semester in your sorority!
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Old 05-07-2012, 04:47 PM
ProudandTrue ProudandTrue is offline
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Thank you for sharing your recruitment story -- congrats on Delta Gamma! It was also much appreciated that you didn't spread your story out over several days of posts. A quick read is refreshing for those of us needing our recruitment fix!
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Old 05-07-2012, 05:56 PM
Mevara Mevara is offline
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Loved that you didn't drag it out! Congrats to you and DG.
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