Please help!

[delaryn13]

I want to start this by saying that I realize that there are already similar threads, but I want ed to ask about my particular situation.

I am a freshman at UTSA and will be transferring to UT Austin in the fall. I have no family or friends who are or were in sororities and they don't really support my desire to be in one. I am really struggling to find recommendations, which I know is important at my school. I have already registered with the Panhellenic Association here, but they have not responded to me at all. I've ask friends, family, family member's friends, co-workers, etc. and got 1 definite & some possibilities, but not nearly enough. I don't know where else to look, so I figured some of y'all may have ideas or know specific organizations in my area that could help me.

Thanks!

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by delaryn13

I want to start this by saying that I realize that there are already similar threads, but I want ed to ask about my particular situation.

I am a freshman at UTSA and will be transferring to UT Austin in the fall. I have no family or friends who are or were in sororities and they don't really support my desire to be in one. I am really struggling to find recommendations, which I know is important at my school. I have already registered with the Panhellenic Association here, but they have not responded to me at all. I've ask friends, family, family member's friends, co-workers, etc. and got 1 definite & some possibilities, but not nearly enough. I don't know where else to look, so I figured some of y'all may have ideas or know specific organizations in my area that could help me.

Thanks!

Your situation is not unique. Do a search about recs. Use Google and include Greekchat in the search; it usually yields more results.

But basically... ask EVERYONE, men included. They might have friends or relatives who are Greek.

::waiting for someone to find and post the all-things-rec thread::

[andthen]

Originally Posted by delaryn13

I want to start this by saying that I realize that there are already similar threads, but I want ed to ask about my particular situation.

I am a freshman at UTSA and will be transferring to UT Austin in the fall. I have no family or friends who are or were in sororities and they don't really support my desire to be in one. I am really struggling to find recommendations, which I know is important at my school. I have already registered with the Panhellenic Association here, but they have not responded to me at all. I've ask friends, family, family member's friends, co-workers, etc. and got 1 definite & some possibilities, but not nearly enough. I don't know where else to look, so I figured some of y'all may have ideas or know specific organizations in my area that could help me.

Thanks!

I hate to say this but your situation isn't all that unique. Again, I would advise you to look through the threads as there has been plenty of tips on how to get recs that have been given time and time again.

The best thing I can tell you is just ask around, people you work with, high school teachers, people at church etc. If you've registered with the Alumnae Panhellenic, depending on how long its been since your initial contact then its totally appropriate to follow up and ask them if there is any information they need from you. If you contacted them last week I would give it a bit of time. Also on other big tip, keep your options open to all of the sororities at UT.

Best of luck!

[delaryn13]

I know I am far from unique, lol I have looked through several threads similar to mine. When I said I wanted to ask about my particular situation, that was directed at the part about "knowing specific organizations in my area that could help me." I've seen posts that go as far as approaching people at the grocery store, but I find that really weird and would even know what to say.

[AZTheta]

So - tell me, what do you think you could do? Where else could you search for recommendations? Maybe there AREN'T any organizations in your area (San Antonio?), and so what else would you think to do? You didn't mention asking any of your high school teachers, or your current college professors.

We give suggestions; however, you need to put some thought into this and figure out how to be creative and get what you need. Or you can go to recruitment with no recommendations. The choice is yours.

Somehow I get the impression from PNMs on GC that they visualize area Panhellenics members as sitting around waiting for PNMs to ask for recs.

[adpiucf]

The good news is that you are starting this now and have time... rather than it being the week before recruitment!

Talk to every person you know: man or woman. Every teacher you've ever had (so many teachers are Greeks!). Talk to your friends already in college. Talk to every relative. Ask your parents to ask around with their friends and their friends' kids. Post on Facebook. Etc. Someone will know someone.

You can also go on Facebook and look at the sorority FB pages to see if anyone you are friends with has "liked" that page-- chances are they are a member or know someone who is.

If the alumnae panhellenic in your area isn't getting back to you, contact them again. Contact the individual sorority alumnae associations in your hometown as well to ask for assistance in securing recs. If they aren't getting back to you either, contact the alumnae panhellenics and individual sorority alumnae associations in the next town over and so on until someone responds. You can register with multiple alumnae panhellenic associations-- try Houston, for example.

Whenever someone commits to writing a rec, thank them and ask them if they have any referrals for the other sororities you need. Chances are they do or can make inquiries.

Keep asking around. Does UTSA have sororities? Do you know anyone in the sororities there? Ask for their help, as well.

Go back to your one definite and ask if she knows anyone else who can assist you. Follow up with your "possibilities" to make them definites and ask them if they know anyone else who can assist you.

[thetalady]

Originally Posted by delaryn13

I know I am far from unique, lol I have looked through several threads similar to mine. When I said I wanted to ask about my particular situation, that was directed at the part about "knowing specific organizations in my area that could help me." I've seen posts that go as far as approaching people at the grocery store, but I find that really weird and would even know what to say.

NO, none of us would recommend approaching perfect strangers at the grocery store.

You are a current student at UTSA. Do you mean to tell us that you don't know a SINGLE sorority girl on campus now? Surely not, my dear.

Some sororities, NOT ALL, will allow a current member to write a recommendation for a PNM at a DIFFERENT chapter. And maybe those sorority girls at UTSA can put you in touch with alumnae who wrote THEIR recs for other organizations, too. Sorority girls know other sorority girls & alumnae!

If it is worth it to you, get your courage up and get to work!

[delaryn13]

AZTheta- I would not have come here, if I hadn't done everything that I knew to do. None of my teachers (past or present) were in sororities, I asked. Family friends, doctors, grandparents coworkers, Alumnae groups on facebook & in person, friend's parents, boss, etc. I have been down every path that I can think of. I have gotten a few, but not nearly enough. And for your comment about think alumnae wait around for me, that is the furthest thing from the truth. I realize how much work they put into it and am always grateful. I provide them with everything that they need (resume, transcript, pictures, etc.) and send thank you notes to each one.

I realize that many people on GC are fed up with pnm's who don't want to put in the effort, but don't assume that all off us are that way.

[thetalady]

Originally Posted by adpiucf

Keep asking around. Does UTSA have sororities? Do you know anyone in the sororities there? Ask for their help, as well.

JINX!!!! Buy me a Coke!!

[delaryn13]

Originally Posted by thetalady

NO, none of us would recommend approaching perfect strangers at the grocery store.

You are a current student at UTSA. Do you mean to tell us that you don't know a SINGLE sorority girl on campus now? Surely not, my dear.

Haha, I thought that seemed a little ridiculous!

Have I seen them around or have classes with them, yes. Do I know any personally, no.

[thetalady]

Originally Posted by delaryn13

Haha, I thought that seemed a little ridiculous!

Have I seen them around or have classes with them, yes. Do I know any personally, no.

Then GET YOUR A$$ IN GEAR!!! Time to start chatting them up about how excited you are about transferring & rushing. Ask them about what they love most about being in a sorority. How have they juggled sorority activities & class commitments. People love to talk about themselves & things that are important to them. If you see a sorority girl that you are in a class with, offer to buy frozen yogurt or coffee, if she has a few minutes to talk.

Your time is short. No time to be shy.

[AZTheta]

Originally Posted by delaryn13

AZTheta- I would not have come here, if I hadn't done everything that I knew to do. None of my teachers (past or present) were in sororities, I asked. Family friends, doctors, grandparents coworkers, Alumnae groups on facebook & in person, friend's parents, boss, etc. I have been down every path that I can think of. I have gotten a few, but not nearly enough. And for your comment about think alumnae wait around for me, that is the furthest thing from the truth. I realize how much work they put into it and am always grateful. I provide them with everything that they need (resume, transcript, pictures, etc.) and send thank you notes to each one.

I realize that many people on GC are fed up with pnm's who don't want to put in the effort, but don't assume that all off us are that way.

Wait…what? You've already gotten recs? I'm confused now.

ETA: oh yes, a few.

And please don't misquote me. I said PNMs, not YOU in particular. And I'm not fed up. Read what I wrote.

[delaryn13]

AZTheta- Firstly, I apologize for misquoting you, I assumed that it was directed at me personally. Secondly, yes, I have one woman who said she will definitely write one, and a couple who I'm not 100% sure about.

[pinksequins]

My understanding is that she has some recs, but not many.

OP, Texas of all places has strong Panhellenic alumnae associations that put on recruitment sessions and help connect PNMs and rec writers. Read the UT recruitment threads. I would be gobsmacked if SA doesn"t have a very active Panhellenic alumnae group.

[ukdzccd]

I have personally received requests for letters of recommendation funneled down to me through my alumnae chapter. You might want to look to see what alumna chapter groups are in the area of UT or the school you are at now and see if one of them will write a letter.

Some of the members may ask to speak to you personally (phone or in person) and I suspect all will ask for information from you about why you want to join a sorority and why they should recommend you for joining their sorority.

Texas is COMPETITIVE and chances of getting into any sorority without a letter of rec I'd say is slim to none.