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  #91  
Old 10-17-2018, 01:49 AM
beckymer92 beckymer92 is offline
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If it’s hard to tell girls apart between “tiers” and if all chapters have quality girls (as has been said over and over on this forum), then if a chapter supposedly rushes for looks, they will get good girls no matter what.

Nobody is boiling down the whole of a pnm (or women in general) to looks, just as chapters that want the cheerleaders or athletes aren’t boiling the totality of a pnm to that particular attribute. There is the (correct) assumption that girls who rush at any school tend to be well put together girls. That’s it.

Girls get dropped or picked because of their fashion sense or level of social skills or GPA or whatever. What’s the difference?

Advocating for interference with new school colonizing based on rumors and allegation?? That’s not only out of line, it’s vindictive. I see a lot of ruffled feathers over Alpha Phi’s success. I’m still waiting on that hard evidence that they ignore everything about a pnm except their looks.
  #92  
Old 10-17-2018, 03:37 AM
DeltaEmi88 DeltaEmi88 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beckymer92 View Post
If it’s hard to tell girls apart between “tiers” and if all chapters have quality girls (as has been said over and over on this forum), then if a chapter supposedly rushes for looks, they will get good girls no matter what.

Nobody is boiling down the whole of a pnm (or women in general) to looks, just as chapters that want the cheerleaders or athletes aren’t boiling the totality of a pnm to that particular attribute. There is the (correct) assumption that girls who rush at any school tend to be well put together girls. That’s it.

Girls get dropped or picked because of their fashion sense or level of social skills or GPA or whatever. What’s the difference?

Advocating for interference with new school colonizing based on rumors and allegation?? That’s not only out of line, it’s vindictive. I see a lot of ruffled feathers over Alpha Phi’s success. I’m still waiting on that hard evidence that they ignore everything about a pnm except their looks.

Okay, I've read this entire thread, and I have a few things to add here. I want you to read the above post, because just a few posts back, you also stated the following:


Quote:
Originally Posted by beckymer92 View Post
Rushing for looks is only a problem if you stereotype attractive women as unintelligent, unmotivated, uncaring and unkind.

Me? I'd rather be a member of an org filled with Amy Conley Barretts, Mia Loves, Lolo Joneses, Melania Trumps and Michelle Malkins any day over an org filled with the likes of Madeline Albright and RBG.

These two posts contradict each other in every single way. Furthermore, this post absolutely tears down two intelligent, accomplished women, one of whom happens to be an alumna of AEPhi. "Becky", these two posts demonstrate looking at a PNM's qualities based on their physical appearance, not by their intelligence, character, or any other qualities that define that individual as a person. These posts do not demonstrate how you would see a PNM as an actual person, with feelings, or a personality. These posts simply define how you look at a person's exterior. Sure, there are beautiful women who have equally beautiful personalities and can add so much value to a chapter, but if all you're looking at is a woman's physical beauty, then that chapter will miss out on so much potential greatness.


Quote:
Originally Posted by bevinpiphi View Post
Looks don't determine the quality of a woman.


Quote:
Originally Posted by beckymer92 View Post
Exactly! Which means there is no causation between rushing for looks and poor outcomes/low-quality members.

I want to challenge you to simply think about what you've written. Your reply to Bev's comment is the biggest whoosh I've seen in a while, and honestly, it's quite disgusting. This reply suggests that chapters who do not rush for looks have poor outcomes and receive low-quality members, when read in the context of the rest of your posts.



However, there's a quote from Sarah Ida Shaw that I find to be so fitting in a time like this, even though it's attributed to Tri Delta's founding. If there's anyone who is struggling with what they're reading right now (just like I am), I hope it brings a little hope. "Let us found a society that shall be kind alike to all and think more of a girl's inner self and character than of her personal appearance."



I have to believe that the founders of each of our organizations would have wanted something better than shallow, looks-based recruitment, because each organization has a value system that is so much deeper than the outer beauty of its members. Outer beauty isn't a negative thing, but it doesn't create a sisterhood, nor does it sustain those bonds throughout the years.
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  #93  
Old 10-17-2018, 07:23 AM
Sciencewoman Sciencewoman is offline
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Could a moderator please close this thread?

I think this has devolved into a discussion of membership selection criteria, which those of us who ARE sorority members know is not an appropriate discussion to have on GreekChat or elsewhere.

There are no sour grapes here -- the sorority members who have posted have reiterated our shared commitment to the values upon which ALL of our organizations were founded, and which we hope will continue.
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  #94  
Old 10-17-2018, 08:02 AM
PGD-GRAD PGD-GRAD is offline
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^^^^VERY well said Sciencewoman! You are spot on, as usual; our shared values and beautifully-written historic ideals as members of the Greek community are truly the ties that bind us.

(Oh that we had a “moderator” who could pull the plug on some of the “threads” constantly coming of Washington, DC....)
  #95  
Old 10-17-2018, 09:59 AM
AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Thank you DeltaEmi88.

"becky" is clearly an APhi official. Her spinning is astonishing but not unexpected. Further, I refer everyone to the Arizona connection to APhi's practices. And I ask that you all step back and consider the much bigger picture for all 26 NPCs. I am very concerned for all of us. This isn't a trivial matter, people. It's ugly and it also speaks to the current political climate. "becky's" definition of "success" (and her harping on sour grapes notwithstanding) is making our founders vomit.
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  #96  
Old 10-17-2018, 10:20 AM
NYCMS NYCMS is offline
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I'm going to throw in one comment. Becky has repeatedly said that rushing for 'looks' is no different than houses who rush for academics, sports, camp/church connections, etc.

There's a huge difference, HUGE. Rushing for the things I listed is when houses look for achievement, accomplishment, character, ability to collaborate and "play well" (sports team, leadership in groups, etc.) initiative, academics. Rushing for looks implies that the exterior is most important. Yes, it's been that one can be very attractive and have other great qualities, but when PNM's are ranked on looks first, that values style over substance. Not what any of our organization's intended when they founded our groups, not at all.

And for what it's worth, I know every Panhellenic sister here is proud to be a member of THEIR sorority. If you think any of us is jealous of Alpha Phi, then think again, that is incredibly misguided. I could not be prouder to be a Gamma Phi Beta just as I know other women here cherish their membership and sisterhood as well.
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Last edited by NYCMS; 10-17-2018 at 10:48 AM.
  #97  
Old 10-17-2018, 10:46 AM
beckymer92 beckymer92 is offline
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I’ve said:
1. There is no evidence of Alpha Phi rushing for looks at the expense of other qualities.
2. In reality, there is no problem selecting for athleticism, religion, looks, social skills, GPA, sense of humor or any other quality. It happens in all chapters now.
4. If girls are being singled out because they are funny or attractive or smart, it’s because there is an understanding that many positive qualities exist in that individual.
5. PNMs and women are a sum of characteristics and no person is reduced to any one characteristic.
6. It’s vindictive to run negative interference with operations based on innuendo and rumor.
7. Alpha Phi is a very successful, historic, valuable sorority that contributes positively everywhere they are.
  #98  
Old 10-17-2018, 10:50 AM
AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beckymer92 View Post
I’ve said:
1. There is no evidence of Alpha Phi rushing for looks at the expense of other qualities.
2. In reality, there is no problem selecting for athleticism, religion, looks, social skills, GPA, sense of humor or any other quality. It happens in all chapters now.
4. If girls are being singled out because they are funny or attractive or smart, it’s because there is an understanding that many positive qualities exist in that individual.
5. PNMs and women are a sum of characteristics and no person is reduced to any one characteristic.
6. It’s vindictive to run negative interference with operations based on innuendo and rumor.
7. Alpha Phi is a very successful, historic, valuable sorority that contributes positively everywhere they are.
Just stop "becky" from APhi. Just STOP. Your spinning is beyond ridiculous.
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  #99  
Old 10-17-2018, 10:56 AM
beckymer92 beckymer92 is offline
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There is NO difference when rushing for looks versus rushing for GPA, sports ability, etc. Why? Because in all cases, a characteristics is leading. Why should a sense of humor be prioritized?? Why should religion cancel someone out? Why would GPA get someone a bid and not others? GPA without a look at coursework doesn't tell who the good student is. Why should girls with less intelligence or a wicked hard major (which might mean a lower GPA) mean they may not get picked??

THIS is the crux. It's picking and choosing. That in and of itself leaves people out no matter the category.

You can't have it both ways, ladies. Being OK with some positive attributes but not others.
  #100  
Old 10-17-2018, 10:58 AM
Sciencewoman Sciencewoman is offline
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Please close this thread.

No one will provide evidence beyond the link that was originally shared, because that would be sharing private membership selection criteria, which is highly inappropriate for any sorority member to do.
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  #101  
Old 10-17-2018, 10:59 AM
AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beckymer92 View Post
There is NO difference when rushing for looks versus rushing for GPA, sports ability, etc. Why? Because in all cases, a characteristics is leading. Why should a sense of humor be prioritized?? Why should religion cancel someone out? Why would GPA get someone a bid and not others? GPA without a look at coursework doesn't tell who the good student is. Why should girls with less intelligence or a wicked hard major (which might mean a lower GPA) mean they may not get picked??

THIS is the crux. It's picking and choosing. That in and of itself leaves people out no matter the category.

You can't have it both ways, ladies. Being OK with some positive attributes but not others.
She is not going to stop and she doesn't see the flaws in her thinking and I agree with Sciencewoman, just lock the thread now. "becky" has done more damage in her attempt at damage control and she's way out of line in terms of membership selection and discussing it openly. STOP.
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"One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." Bertrand Russell, The Triumph of Stupidity
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