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  #1  
Old 05-12-2004, 05:00 PM
AlethiaSi AlethiaSi is offline
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drama between sisters

i freaking feel like the drama never ends with me- its so rediculous basically without going into too much detail- one of my "sisters" hooked up with this guy who he and i have been dating/seeing each other for over 8 months... she was told repeatedly by several people not to hook up with him b/c he and i were still on and off- and she's known our history- but she did it anyway- (plus i've already talked to him about it- and he verified it too) i feel so hurt and betrayed- and this is not the first time she's done this to one of us either... she's always a trouble maker- and i didn't even want her in the sorority- but she is- and so i was always nice to her- just not that close.... i'm so upset and mad at her.....

since the semester is over and its the summer i just am letting this get to me.... i've already talked to her about it- and she knows i'm really mad.... i don't want to be around her (and she deliberately chose to live in the room next to mine in the house too!! grrr) can i do anything- should i just ignore her? my sisters are all really upset and mad at her too- they don't want to be around her and they don't like her either b/c of this and many other situations oh- and she was a problem pledge too!.... has anyone else dealt with a situation like this?
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  #2  
Old 05-12-2004, 05:25 PM
Tom Earp Tom Earp is offline
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Thumbs down

Basically you are either on or off! Which is it. Maybe the guy is getting tired of it! You know Guys get tired of the BS too!

Or as Ross said to Rachel, We Were On A Break!

Since when did you own him.? Were You Happy with Him? Was He Happy With You? If you are on and off, who decides this?

So maybe in an off period He found someone else who makes him more happy than sad!

It sounds like to me, I would have left you for someone else along time ago or vice versa!

You better never hope you marry Him or He marrys you, it wont last!

Not from the sounds of this little diatrabe!
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  #3  
Old 05-12-2004, 05:31 PM
33girl 33girl is offline
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If it was a situation just between the two of you, I'd say try and get past it for the sorority's sake and just make sure you don't leave your man alone with her in the future.

But if she's caused other problems in the sorority that aren't boy-related and is constantly a devisive factor, I'd say look at terminating her membership.

And also, please don't take this the wrong way, but make sure she was the guilty party/initiator, not your on-off boyfriend. Sometimes we see things the way we want them to be, not the way they are.
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  #4  
Old 05-12-2004, 05:56 PM
SigPhiSunshine SigPhiSunshine is offline
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yea we have a problem sister too, and we are contemplating if we should get rid of her or not, but she is really bad and does things that makes us embarrased bc that we hang out with knows were all in the same sorority and that just makes us look like shit.
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  #5  
Old 05-12-2004, 06:32 PM
AOII_LB93 AOII_LB93 is offline
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Not to bring up the obvious, but didn't you just get back from a semester abroad where you were asking about staying with a guy you met in London in the Relationships area of GC in this thread http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...threadid=50550
How can you be upset when you were dating others too?
I'm not excusing what your sister did, but if you were away and hooking up with other guys, what does it matter what she did with the guy you were seeing? Long distance relationships are ridiculous unless both parties are truly committed to it working, and if you are asking about staying with a guy you met in London then you weren't really that committed to the guy in the States.

Why not be mad at the guy? He was a willing participant. Yes, sisters should know better, but don't just blame her. People make mistakes, and I think that we all can forget that sometimes. So she moved in next to you, you're going to have to face the situation sooner or later. If this is something that she has done repeatedly then bring her up to standards or morals or chapter relations or whatever you call it, but don't rally the house around your cause, that's just not cool.

Last edited by AOII_LB93; 05-12-2004 at 06:35 PM.
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  #6  
Old 05-12-2004, 06:55 PM
Munchkin03 Munchkin03 is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by AOII_LB93

Why not be mad at the guy? He was a willing participant.
It's just too logical to remember that it takes 2 to tango, and he's equally guilty.

This reminds me of those trash TV shows where the woman, when she finds out her gross-a$$ man is cheating on her, lunges for the other woman instead of the man.
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  #7  
Old 05-12-2004, 07:39 PM
AlethiaSi AlethiaSi is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by Munchkin03

This reminds me of those trash TV shows where the woman, when she finds out her gross-a$$ man is cheating on her, lunges for the other woman instead of the man.

hahahaha soo true- i see what you are saying- and he was a willing participant- and he should have known better- we have had problems in the past- and i knew when i came back we weren't prob going to get back together- i just feel so betrayed... i've already semi- talked to her about it- and she denied the whole thing- so i called him and found out that it was true....

it is true that i didn't want her in- but i wanted to give her a chance.... obviously i can't trust her.... i'm going to bring it up with our exec board in the fall- thanks guys for the advice and i'll definately keep you posted- (i'll be up at my school this weekend for graduation so i'll see what happens)

oh yea- and the guy got kicked out of school for a year for drug's and DEA investigation... a real winner right... at least i won't have him to deal with lol
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  #8  
Old 05-12-2004, 09:34 PM
Stacekat Stacekat is offline
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I'd bring it up before fall. This needs to be resolved ASAP. You can't go into formal recruitment with the entire house divided. The guy sounds like a real winner, you are fortunate to have gotten rid of him so easily. I hope for your sake that the doesn't investigation somehow doesn't tie you to the drug problems. If you all have a history, they will bring you in for an interview. That would be bad for your house too...

Sometimes I honestly wonder if we can give IQ tests to PNM's just to see whether they are worthy of being sisters. Jeez people, use your heads! Don't sleep with your sisters/bro's exes. Don't do drugs. Don't haze. Just quit doing dumb stuff! I hate reading the stories about how evil greeks are. I LOVE reading stories about all the great stuff we do. We do more good than bad, but the bad just gets more press. Just do more good stuff. It's really not that hard!

Aye, Aye, Aye!!!
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  #9  
Old 05-12-2004, 09:40 PM
kddani kddani is offline
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Yeah it sucks, but what the heck does this have to do with your sorority? It's a personal issue between you, her, and your mutual hook up buddy.

Unless you sorority has a bylaw that says thou shall not hook up with a sister's f*$# friend, your sorority has nothing to do with it.

Leave the exec board out of it, don't get the sorority involved. It's not fair to pull more people into the situation than need be, and it's not any of their business.

If you've been on again off again with guy, I don't know what's so surprising. If you want commitment, have a relationship. You already admit the guy's an ass, she's an ass, so don't they deserve each other then?
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Old 05-12-2004, 09:55 PM
James James is offline
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Re: drama between sisters

I read about something just like this in the book, Pledged, Secret lives of sororities . . . .


Quote:
Originally posted by AlethiaSi
i freaking feel like the drama never ends with me- its so rediculous basically without going into too much detail- one of my "sisters" hooked up with this guy who he and i have been dating/seeing each other for over 8 months... she was told repeatedly by several people not to hook up with him b/c he and i were still on and off- and she's known our history- but she did it anyway- (plus i've already talked to him about it- and he verified it too) i feel so hurt and betrayed- and this is not the first time she's done this to one of us either... she's always a trouble maker- and i didn't even want her in the sorority- but she is- and so i was always nice to her- just not that close.... i'm so upset and mad at her.....

since the semester is over and its the summer i just am letting this get to me.... i've already talked to her about it- and she knows i'm really mad.... i don't want to be around her (and she deliberately chose to live in the room next to mine in the house too!! grrr) can i do anything- should i just ignore her? my sisters are all really upset and mad at her too- they don't want to be around her and they don't like her either b/c of this and many other situations oh- and she was a problem pledge too!.... has anyone else dealt with a situation like this?
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  #11  
Old 05-12-2004, 10:00 PM
James James is offline
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Also, I know you are not going to want to hear this but you were over. You were not going out, and you were 4 thousand miles away. She technically did nothing wrong. Certainly nothing to get quite this upset about.

Honestly ladies, having sex with a boy is not the same as an animal pissing on him to mark him as territory for life.
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  #12  
Old 05-13-2004, 01:07 AM
KillarneyRose KillarneyRose is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by James
...having sex with a boy is not the same as an animal pissing on him to mark him as territory for life.

That reminds me of my good friend, an SAE, hooked up with this girl and while they were....nevermind, too gross to talk about!
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  #13  
Old 05-13-2004, 02:21 AM
opaldragon opaldragon is offline
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Are you serious that he, uh, yeah... that's interesting there.
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  #14  
Old 05-13-2004, 02:32 AM
UKDaisy UKDaisy is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by James
Also, I know you are not going to want to hear this but you were over. You were not going out, and you were 4 thousand miles away. She technically did nothing wrong. Certainly nothing to get quite this upset about.

Honestly ladies, having sex with a boy is not the same as an animal pissing on him to mark him as territory for life.
I agree with the animal peeing and territory for life thing. Some of us, totally including myself, take for heart that just b/c we dated/currently dating/or like a guy that most of our friends won't do anything about it. That is a lot of BS in some cases. Girls be aware.

HOWEVER......this other girl is stupid if she thinks that this wouldn't somehow involve most of her sorority sisters. I can just picture this happening in my chapter. Certain sisters would have agreed w/ one while others agreeing w/ the other. That is drama!!!!

I am really sorry this happened to you! But I agree that you should terminate this guy being in your life! Also, be careful about involving your exec board. You may mention in case she does pity party - you the two of you recently had problems. But thats it. B/c then that puts them in the whole situation. Which equals more drama. And drama is bad.
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  #15  
Old 05-13-2004, 07:08 AM
moe.ron moe.ron is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by KillarneyRose
That reminds me of my good friend, an SAE, hooked up with this girl and while they were....nevermind, too gross to talk about!
Thanks KR, now I have it in my head. Yuck.
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