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Sorority Recruitment Recruitment event and bid day ideas, membership retention, publicity, recruitment policies, etc.


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  #61  
Old 08-14-2018, 10:33 PM
TXDG TXDG is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crcact View Post
New here. Went through this process years and years ago. Now, my daughter is waiting to hear the news. Quick question: IF you are going to drop out, is it better to do it BEFORE preference (once you see your party list) or is it better to attend preference parties and then not sign the card at all (if you don't like them still)? Don't both scenarios make you available for COB/snap bids (rare, we know)? I am just on pins and needles. She had a few disappointments after round 2 so I am trying to keep her positive and open-minded!
Go to Pref. Those pref ceremonies are emotional and are often “game changers” with regard to how PNM’s view their house. I was on the fence about DG and my other pref chapter and left DG crying and dying to be one. A girl I hadn’t met all week preffed me - and the beginning of the hour I was upset and thinking they didn’t like me because I was paired with a stranger on the most important night of rush...she ended up being my big!

If she signs her pref card and then declines a bid, she is ineligible to rush until next fall. It’s basically the same as accepting and then dropping. She would be eligible for snaps (don’t EVER count this “unicorn” bid as an option in the process) and COB as long as she doesn’t sign a Pref card.

On campuses with larger chapters (not sure if this applies to your DD), there are so many girls in the new member classes that if you get a bid ANYWHERE, I think you should take it and do your best to make friends before initiation. My pledge class 20 years ago had 75 girls in it. There were literally 4-5 different “friend groups” in the pledge class (parties, church girls, sporty girls, brainy girls, etc) and some groups overlapped and floated between each other. The only couple of girls who didn’t have friends didn’t make any effort to be a friend themselves. This is different on small campuses where a pledge class of 15 might be pretty cohesive.
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  #62  
Old 08-15-2018, 03:59 PM
RMK305 RMK305 is offline
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Hi. I have been lurking for a while reading the boards and finally decided to join. My daughter is going through formal Fall recruitment beginning next Friday.

She attends a smaller state university and the sororities don't have houses and the process doesn't seem as intense as the larger schools around the country. Like she isn't required to have rec letter for all chapters. etc. There are only 6 sororities at her school. She did get some recs from alumni she knows at some of the sororities just to cover her bases. She is also a legacy at the sorority my sister belonged to (they consider nieces as being legacies) and my sister sent in a recommendation as well.

She is a sophomore. She wanted to wait a year to get acclimated to college life. I think I am more nervous than she is. She is going in with an open mind and believes that whatever is supposed to happen will happen.

Hope every girl going through recruitment this week or next week have an amazing experience and hope everything goes well. I hope to see lots of positive posts in the near future. Happy to have found this "Mom" post so that I can be with other moms who are nervous and antsy like me.

Happy to be here. Thanks!

Last edited by RMK305; 08-15-2018 at 05:11 PM.
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  #63  
Old 08-16-2018, 01:05 PM
EliBean EliBean is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RMK305 View Post
Hi. I have been lurking for a while reading the boards and finally decided to join. My daughter is going through formal Fall recruitment beginning next Friday.
Good luck to your daughter! It's getting close to the end for us.
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  #64  
Old 08-16-2018, 01:14 PM
EliBean EliBean is offline
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My daughter went from 11 to 5 today, but apparently the five were all in her top six, so she's okay with it. She says that tent talk is bad at this point, and at least two girls in her group have dropped out because they lost the houses they wanted. One was a legacy, and I don't know about the other. One of her suitemates dropped out because she's a legacy to the sorority that is colonizing after recruitment, and she decided that she really wanted to give that a shot.

My girl has decided that it's easier going through this process without the pressure to join a legacy house (my sister couldn't care less, and my daughter is technically not considered a legacy through her aunt) or having grown up dreaming about joining a sorority her whole life. I'd imagine it depends on the person, but she's loving it so far.
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  #65  
Old 08-16-2018, 01:18 PM
AnchorAlum AnchorAlum is offline
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This year marks 50 years since I was initiated, and I still find myself interested in coming to this site to find out how rush went across the country.
I also served as VP of Membership - or Rush Chairman, as we were called back in the day. Even though we had no computers or anything of that nature to assist in the process, it just seems that things were so much easier then.
Of course I got very little sleep that week, but I bet that hasn't changed with time either!

I hope your girls find a home where they'll make lasting memories and friends forever. Now, will someone pour me a glass and I'll grab a stool!
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  #66  
Old 08-18-2018, 09:07 AM
OldFLDDD OldFLDDD is offline
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My turn for the wine!!!

OMG ladies. I knew it would be brutal, but still wasn't truly prepared! D is rushing at South Carolina and got her second round schedule today. Got 9 out of a possible 10 houses, which is great, but wow--so many early cuts from her top houses. Also, she completely fell in love/became very attached to a house yesterday and was super emotional--it really caught her off guard as she was not expecting that at all--and knows that it's NOT what you want to do! She did get invited back to that house, which she's thrilled about, but knows it's early in the game. And of course she has to go back to a small handful of houses that she could not see herself in at all. She's read enough recruitment stories to "trust the process" and keep going, but ugh! I just didn't expect it to be this rough. She had multiple recs for some of these houses that cut her. Bummer. I didn't sleep a wink and Bid Day is not until a week from TOMORROW. She's taking lots of notes and wants to post her story down the road. I'll keep you all updated! She said a lot of her friends got cut from their top three so she feels very fortunate.
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  #67  
Old 08-18-2018, 05:23 PM
EliBean EliBean is offline
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I’m so glad we’re almost done with this. It hasn’t been all that hard on me, or her really, but it will be one more thing behind us.

She went from five to two today. She’s apparently fallen in love with one house and she’s thrilled to have them still on her schedule. She likes the other house too, and she said that she could totally see herself there. Even though she likes one a bit more over the other at this point, she feels like she’s winning either way.

Since one of her suitemates dropped to try to join the colony, there are only three of them left, and they all are going in different directions. One, who is also my daughter’s good friend, has two houses left. One that she really likes, and one that she likes a bit less. The third has only one. She’s super excited to have the one she has and my daughter says she seems much more relaxed than the other girls. I guess because she already knows what will happen tomorrow.

Anyway, I really thought she was going to be stressed out and emotional about this whole process, but I’m really impressed with how calm and relaxed she’s actually been. She says it’s hard not to get caught up in the drama of the people around her, but she’s managed to avoid it and just do her thing.

One more day! Good luck to all of you who are still in the middle or starting soon!
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  #68  
Old 08-19-2018, 01:30 PM
APhi2KD APhi2KD is offline
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Wow, what a week it’s been. I know it is SO hard. This week has seen some brutal gut-punches and some cries of relief. My heart goes out to all of you. ❤️❤️❤️
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  #69  
Old 08-19-2018, 08:00 PM
EliBean EliBean is offline
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So, although she kept an open mind the whole week. there was one house my daughter loved from the first round on. She was super excited to get a bid from them today. She's having so much fun and has sent a ton of pictures.

My kiddo is now an Alpha Delta Pi!
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  #70  
Old 08-19-2018, 08:18 PM
OldFLDDD OldFLDDD is offline
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Congrats to your daughter, EliBean! I'm so happy to hear that it worked out for her so well and that you can finally relax. Mine gets her Round 3 schedule in the morning so another sleepless night for me tonight!
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  #71  
Old 08-19-2018, 09:35 PM
clemsongirl clemsongirl is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EliBean View Post
So, although she kept an open mind the whole week. there was one house my daughter loved from the first round on. She was super excited to get a bid from them today. She's having so much fun and has sent a ton of pictures.

My kiddo is now an Alpha Delta Pi!
Congratulations to you for surviving and her for joining our sisterhood!! If you didn't mention it already, what school is she at?
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  #72  
Old 08-20-2018, 10:16 AM
OldFLDDD OldFLDDD is offline
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I now officially hate this

Big cuts again today, including her top two houses (one of which was her legacy house, where she 100% saw herself). She has two more that she likes ok, but the remaining four she has to go to she REALLY does not see herself in. She has yet to connect with anyone in any of them, and has a very hard time keeping a conversation going---the girls rushing her give her one word answers and won't keep eye contact! It is agonizing for her to get through these parties and if she ended up invited to Pref at any of them, I honestly don't know if she'll go through with it. She's now doing the "what am I doing wrong/what is wrong with me/why don't they want me" thing and even though she knows there's SO much going into all the decisions, she's beating herself up. She wants to be Greek SOOO much. When I went through, 30 years ago, I had no cuts, not one. I go to call all of the shots. And I was certainly no more "desirable" than she is. It's just a completely different ball game today with so many girls going through. We were prepared, but apparently not prepared enough. Prefs are not until Sat and Bid Day is Sunday, which is just unfair torture, IMO!!! Sorry, ladies. Just needed to vent. :-(
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  #73  
Old 08-20-2018, 10:34 AM
carnation carnation is offline
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pmed you, OldFloridaDDD.
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  #74  
Old 08-20-2018, 11:45 AM
NYCMS NYCMS is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OldFLDDD View Post
It's just a completely different ball game today with so many girls going through. We were prepared, but apparently not prepared enough.
I don't know if I'd say you weren't prepared - I think it's more that the reality of rush today is just unbelievably difficult and quite different than when so many of us on this board went through (1978 for me). It's as if almost every PNM is outstanding, with terrific resumes, personalities, etc. It's a numbers game more than ever today and that's what I think is the difference, not a lack of preparation. Not sure if your daughter is going to a school where she has few connections in houses, but that does make it harder as well.

I've seen absolutely darling girls go through rush at really competitive Greek system schools and the sheer number of outstanding PNM's makes it really tough - the cuts are brutal and can be a real shock to the system and make one question themselves, as you've said your daughter is now doing. I'm sorry things aren't going as hoped and that things improve for her and that she can find a home that she can love.

Last edited by NYCMS; 08-20-2018 at 02:42 PM.
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  #75  
Old 08-20-2018, 11:55 AM
TriDeltaSallie TriDeltaSallie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OldFLDDD View Post
Big cuts again today, including her top two houses (one of which was her legacy house, where she 100% saw herself). She has two more that she likes ok, but the remaining four she has to go to she REALLY does not see herself in. She has yet to connect with anyone in any of them, and has a very hard time keeping a conversation going---the girls rushing her give her one word answers and won't keep eye contact! It is agonizing for her to get through these parties and if she ended up invited to Pref at any of them, I honestly don't know if she'll go through with it. She's now doing the "what am I doing wrong/what is wrong with me/why don't they want me" thing and even though she knows there's SO much going into all the decisions, she's beating herself up. She wants to be Greek SOOO much. When I went through, 30 years ago, I had no cuts, not one. I go to call all of the shots. And I was certainly no more "desirable" than she is. It's just a completely different ball game today with so many girls going through. We were prepared, but apparently not prepared enough. Prefs are not until Sat and Bid Day is Sunday, which is just unfair torture, IMO!!! Sorry, ladies. Just needed to vent. :-(
Rush sounds so stressful today at so many schools. I can't imagine how many great girls don't even attempt becoming Greek because of the craziness of it all.

I don't know enough about South Carolina, but is it one of those Greek systems where everyone kind of gets selected according to where they went to high school, camp, etc.?
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My recruitment story: My sorority membership changed my life.
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