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  #1  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:27 AM
JLCo JLCo is offline
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Is Greek right for my dd?

Wanted to get some opinions on whether some people with experience think going Greek would be a good option for my daughter. Below is info/ description of her.

She wants to go to a large university and be part of a nationally ranked College Dance Team. This will involve many hours of practice and performances.

She is truly gifted (IQ 148) and gets impatient with demands that she sees as not being "logical".

However, she seems to be fairly out-going/ social in an independent way.

She would really enjoy participating in the philanthropic activities of a sorority.

Overall, she is attractive and physically fit.

She plans on going to Med school- so I am not sure that some of the political connections made in a sorority would be of as much value to her as someone majoring in other fields.

She will likely participate in Honors program and do intern research

Even though she is "geeky" because of being smart, she is also very hip because she does all types of dance- including hip-hop. The summary here is that she is very unique and I just don't know if her uniqueness plus other commitments would result in her not enjoying Greek life.

Also of note is that she can not afford a semester of bad grades due to the rush week and expectations put on her when she is a new member. Not sure if this is a factor or not or if the sororities would be considerate of her commitment to academics, dance team, and research.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Last edited by JLCo; 01-27-2013 at 08:30 PM.
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  #2  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:34 AM
FSUZeta FSUZeta is offline
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Also of note is that she can not afford a semester of bad grades due to the rush week and expectations put on her when she is a new member. Not sure if this is a factor or not or if the sororities would be considerate of her commitment to academics, dance team, and research.JLCo

This jumped out at me so I will address this. No one can afford a semester of bad grades.Whether your daughter's goal is medical school or something entirely different will be of no concern to the sorority. All the new members are treated the same, and the sorority has the same expectations for them all, no matter their intended major. If you or your daughter are expecting special treatment, then greek life might not be the best activity for her.

There are plenty of sorority members whose goal is medical school. They have learned time management and value their sorority membership as well as academics.
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Last edited by FSUZeta; 01-25-2013 at 11:36 AM.
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  #3  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:36 AM
AXOrushadvisor AXOrushadvisor is offline
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I don't know if Greek Life would be right for your daughter or not. She would need to go through the process and see if it is right for her.

Does she have good time management skills? She will need that in order to participate in a sorority, be on a nationally ranked dance team and take pre-med courses. My niece had to choose between the sorority and the dance team at her university because she didn't think she would be able to handle it. Another thing to consider would be the events she would miss while practicing for the dance team and dance team commitments.

All sororities value good grades. I don't think rush week will impact her grades especially if recruitment is done before school starts. If recruitment is during school she will need good time management skills to stay on top of reading and assignments during the week.

It is not so much the connections that are valuable in Greek Life. It is the life lessons that you learn. It will help her tremendously with her social skills. Most members of Greek Life can ace an interview because they have had 4 years of recruitment experience that mimic the interview process. I would think the social skills she would learn would aide her in having a good bed side manner which would be important in her chosen field.

I think Greek Life is a wonderful experience for most every one. I would certainly not discourage it if she feels like it is something she wants to pursue. It is a time commitment though and she needs to know that going in to the process. Good luck to you..
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  #4  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:43 AM
summer_gphib summer_gphib is offline
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I'm thinking it's a decision, she as an adult, will need to make? Why is Mommy on here trying to decide for her? Each university has a unique Greek Life scene. She should be a big girl and make her own decisions.
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  #5  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:46 AM
chi-o_cat chi-o_cat is offline
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Originally Posted by summer_gphib View Post
Why is Mommy on here trying to decide for her?
Because of her uniqueness?
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  #6  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:44 AM
HQWest HQWest is offline
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This can be really hard to answer without knowing your daughter or her choice of college. (Which for privacy you should not put on here.)

Maybe the better thing to do would be to ask some of her friends?
Does she have friends from high school or cousins that have gone on to college that are now in sororities?
Would she benefit from having a built in peer group when she starts on campus?
Would she benefit from being encouraged to participate more in on campus activities, social events, or philanthropy projects?
Would she just like to meet some other people with similar ideals and interests?

Some schools allow athletes, flag, dance team, and band members to have reduced recruitment schedules so that they can participate in both. Some schools don't allow freshmen on the dance team so that's a moot point.

I can show you sorority women of all shapes sizes and colors that are on the dance team, in the band, homecoming queens, that run track or are on the basketball team. We have elementary ed majors, art majors, business majors, engineers, pre-law, pre-med - you name it. (And that can be just one chapter....)

Last edited by HQWest; 01-25-2013 at 11:47 AM.
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  #7  
Old 01-25-2013, 12:59 PM
JLCo JLCo is offline
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Greek Life

Quote:
Originally Posted by HQWest View Post
This can be really hard to answer without knowing your daughter or her choice of college. (Which for privacy you should not put on here.)

Maybe the better thing to do would be to ask some of her friends?
Does she have friends from high school or cousins that have gone on to college that are now in sororities?
Would she benefit from having a built in peer group when she starts on campus?
Would she benefit from being encouraged to participate more in on campus activities, social events, or philanthropy projects?
Would she just like to meet some other people with similar ideals and interests?

Some schools allow athletes, flag, dance team, and band members to have reduced recruitment schedules so that they can participate in both. Some schools don't allow freshmen on the dance team so that's a moot point.

I can show you sorority women of all shapes sizes and colors that are on the dance team, in the band, homecoming queens, that run track or are on the basketball team. We have elementary ed majors, art majors, business majors, engineers, pre-law, pre-med - you name it. (And that can be just one chapter....)

Thanks for the info. It sounds like she might like it because I think she would "benefit from being encouraged to participate more in on campus activities, social events, or philanthropy projects?..". I have heard of some people doing sports and being in a sorority and wanted to get some input on this.

Last edited by JLCo; 01-25-2013 at 01:04 PM.
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  #8  
Old 01-25-2013, 01:14 PM
adpiucf adpiucf is offline
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Student athletes, like any sorority member, are expected to maintain the minimum requirements of membership and follow the proper channels to get excused absences if a legitimate school activity (games, practices, etc.) prevents them from participating in a mandatory sorority activity. It is very doable. That being said, most student athletes don't pledge Greek organizations because of the dual time constraints and the fact that their sports team is like sorority all on its own. The same is true of band members, theatre majors, etc., where those student groups spend a lot of time together. Those student-athletes/band members/dance team members who do pledge sororities are valuable members that the chapter proudly cheers on and brags about!

My sorority had a few girls on the cheerleading squad and dance team. Some held office in the sorority, lived in the house, went to social activities and philanthropy events, and certainly missed a sorority event here and there due to their sports obligations, but overall I would say these women got the most out of their sorority experience... just like any other member with various commitments! In fact, most sororities require their members to be involved with at least one other campus activity outside Greek Life (which dance team certainly would be) to maintain balance and nurture their personal interests. Pretty much every sorority member is juggling classes, sorority obligations, and other campus commitments. Some are working and interning, too.

Basically, if your kid rushes and get a bid, it's up to her to make friends, meet her commitments, pay dues/tuition/room and board, and manage her time. She's an adult now. I get that you may have some input if you're the one controlling the purse strings, but a sorority isn't going to turn your daughter into a raging party whore alcoholic who will fail out of school and never become a doctor. She can be successful or fail all on her own. Individuals make their own life choices, not the organizations they join.

There's no harm in her rushing. Most sororities hold recruitment before school starts, they all have GPA requirements and several require members to put in study hours at the library each week.
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Last edited by adpiucf; 01-25-2013 at 01:25 PM.
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  #9  
Old 01-25-2013, 01:20 PM
pinapple pinapple is offline
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OP...your daughter sounds very talented but please remember that the majority of women in the Greek community are top notch people. When someone comes here and basically says "I am not sure but my daughter might be too awesome to be Greek!!" you will not make many friends.

With that said, it truly depends on what YOUR daughter can handle. I am very familiar with one of the most competitive Greek Systems in the country and it boils down to what everyone has said. Time management. Their are girls here that are cheerleaders, dancers and pre-med pulling 4.0s and hanging out on 6th street on Thursday night. There are others who major in "less" intense majors that are at the library every night trying to keep up. It all depends on the individual. It is my experience that more rigorous the course load in High School the better off the student in college is Greek or not. So if your daughter has been academically pushing herself in HS (ie, high GPA, high SAT or ACT) and balancing her dance she will probably be fine. If she is going to attend a large state university in the SEC or Texas, start with your local Panhellenic and start gathering recs. It's not too early and they have already started coming in for Fall 2013.

In closing, keep in mind that even if she wants to be Greek doesn't mean she will be. (Some houses here will release girls on GPA alone...some wanting 3.75 or higher...so some girls can be on the chopping block before recruitment even starts) She needs to polish her communication skills, make connections with active Greek women at the University she is focusing on and enter recruitment with an open mind.
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  #10  
Old 01-25-2013, 01:35 PM
JLCo JLCo is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pinapple View Post
OP...your daughter sounds very talented but please remember that the majority of women in the Greek community are top notch people. When someone comes here and basically says "I am not sure but my daughter might be too awesome to be Greek!!" you will not make many friends.

With that said, it truly depends on what YOUR daughter can handle. I am very familiar with one of the most competitive Greek Systems in the country and it boils down to what everyone has said. Time management. Their are girls here that are cheerleaders, dancers and pre-med pulling 4.0s and hanging out on 6th street on Thursday night. There are others who major in "less" intense majors that are at the library every night trying to keep up. It all depends on the individual. It is my experience that more rigorous the course load in High School the better off the student in college is Greek or not. So if your daughter has been academically pushing herself in HS (ie, high GPA, high SAT or ACT) and balancing her dance she will probably be fine. If she is going to attend a large state university in the SEC or Texas, start with your local Panhellenic and start gathering recs. It's not too early and they have already started coming in for Fall 2013.

In closing, keep in mind that even if she wants to be Greek doesn't mean she will be. (Some houses here will release girls on GPA alone...some wanting 3.75 or higher...so some girls can be on the chopping block before recruitment even starts) She needs to polish her communication skills, make connections with active Greek women at the University she is focusing on and enter recruitment with an open mind.
Pinapple-
I don't think my dd is too awesome to be Grrek... just not sure if she will fit in with her personality type and if she would be able to do everything she wants to do at the same time...
Also- we are looking at some large universities in the SEC because they offer very generous scholarships to those with high GPA and test scores. However, we live in the Midwest. Any suggestions on making connections since we do not know any former alumni?
Thanks!!
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  #11  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:57 AM
ElvisLover ElvisLover is offline
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IMO, let her go through and see if she wants to be a part of a group. She can always drop if she's overwhelmed by it.
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  #12  
Old 01-25-2013, 11:57 AM
Old_Row Old_Row is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JLCo View Post
Wanted to get some opinions on whether some people with experience think going Greek would be a good option for my daughter. Below is info/ description of her.

She wants to go to a large university and be part of a nationally ranked College Dance Team. This will involve many hours of practice and performances.

She is truly gifted (IQ 148) and gets impatient with demands that she sees as not being "logical".

However, she seems to be fairly out-going/ social in an independent way.

She would really enjoy participating in the philanthropic activities of a sorority.

Overall, she is attractive and physically fit.

She plans on going to Med school- so I am not sure that some of the political connections made in a sorority would be of as much value to her as someone majoring in other fields.

She will likely participate in Honors program and do intern research

Even though she is "geeky" because of being smart, she is also very hip because she does all types of dance- including killing hip-hop.

The summary here is that she is very unique and I just don't know if her uniqueness plus other commitments would result in her not enjoying Greek life.
Also of note is that she can not afford a semester of bad grades due to the rush week and expectations put on her when she is a new member. Not sure if this is a factor or not or if the sororities would be considerate of her commitment to academics, dance team, and research.

Any advice would be appreciated.
Everyone is unique. Your daughter is not any different or more special than anyone else.
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  #13  
Old 01-25-2013, 12:22 PM
AnchorAlumna AnchorAlumna is offline
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"very unique"

My English major soul is righteously indignant. Forgive it, please.
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  #14  
Old 01-25-2013, 12:44 PM
DeltaBetaBaby DeltaBetaBaby is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna View Post
"very unique"

My English major soul is righteously indignant. Forgive it, please.
Hahaha, if you click on a thread that has "dd" right in the title, you get what you deserve, AA.
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  #15  
Old 01-25-2013, 12:53 PM
SydneyK SydneyK is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by summer_gphib View Post
Why is Mommy on here trying to decide for her?
If the OP is for real, then ^^ this.

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna View Post
"very unique"
I know, right? That's right up there with "a little bit pregnant" in my book.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby View Post
Hahaha, if you click on a thread that has "dd" right in the title, you get what you deserve, AA.
This, too.

Sigh.
I guess I thought this was a troll. I'm still hoping that's the case. Please, oh please, let this be a troll.
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