Girlie AGDee's College Search Thread

[AGDee]

We had a lot of time to talk today because the state solo & ensemble festival was today and she had performances at 11 am and 4:30 pm. It was an hour away from home so we had a lot of time to kill. Although we supported other kids from her school who were also performing today and watched their performances, there was a lot of down time. One of her friends was also there and they talked a lot about college. Hypo asked if it would be wise to join to the Peace Corps and go to college later and I let know that most positions require a college degree. We talked about the downsides to doing something like that or City Year (Americorps). Her friends were all comparing financial aid packages and how much in debt they'll be in when they graduate and were all in the same boat, for the most part. They were all looking at $15K-$20K a year in loans. I pointed out that college isn't getting any cheaper and those would still be facing her even if she delayed for a year or two. She thought she'd be old enough to qualify as an independent then and get more in grants but I corrected that notion too. Then she came up with the idea of finding a boy in the same position and getting married (only legally, not actually 'being married') so they would qualify for more aid. She's creative if nothing else...lol.

Deep talks, reality hits, growing up isn't always rosy.. all lessons to be learned. Bottom line, we live in a solidly middle class area where people don't qualify for much based on "need" but their parents don't make enough to pay for everything.

She'll be ok. We'll be ok. She feels much better when she looks at the stats of some of the people being rejected from these schools. She read one off to us where the candidate had an SAT of 2350, SATII's of 770 and 780, a 4.0 unweighted in an IB program. He had founded an Interact (teen Rotary) Club at his highschool, was Vice President of the student council for 3 years.. it went on and on and on. We decided that someone who was VP for 3 years and never made it to President must not be Northwestern material! Who is VP for 3 years??? Anyway, she was cracking jokes and laughing about this stuff, so she's doing alright.

I know in my heart that if she goes to Michigan she'll have a great experience there. And, um, maybe she'd be an Alpha Gam or SAI there. Or both

ETA: She totally messed up on her first performance. She couldn't hold her air to get through the long sections where she couldn't find time to take a breath. The judge was really harsh in his delivery of feedback. She's ok though. She's a strong kid

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by AGDee

We discussed financial aid packages and looked at the offer from DePaul again. She doesn't think the amount of loans required for either American or DePaul are worth it. For Barnard, she'd be willing to take on that debt, but not for American or DePaul.

Your girlie has a good head on her shoulders! I'm not a praying woman, but I'm sending lots of positive thoughts about Barnard. Worst-case scenario? She's in at Michigan, which is awesome.

I'm coming across a lot of men and women in their early 20s who took out serious debt at high interest rates to attend regional schools that are far inferior to their state schools. I don't understand taking out a ton of loans for a private school that's going to open fewer doors and cost more than the public school a few hours away.

[Sciencewoman]

Originally Posted by AGDee

She read one off to us where the candidate had an SAT of 2350, SATII's of 770 and 780, a 4.0 unweighted in an IB program. He had founded an Interact (teen Rotary) Club at his highschool, was Vice President of the student council for 3 years.. it went on and on and on. We decided that someone who was VP for 3 years and never made it to President must not be Northwestern material! Who is VP for 3 years??? Anyway, she was cracking jokes and laughing about this stuff, so she's doing alright.

My daughter and I had a good laugh about that one!

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

Your girlie has a good head on her shoulders! I'm not a praying woman, but I'm sending lots of positive thoughts about Barnard. Worst-case scenario? She's in at Michigan, which is awesome.

I'm coming across a lot of men and women in their early 20s who took out serious debt at high interest rates to attend regional schools that are far inferior to their state schools. I don't understand taking out a ton of loans for a private school that's going to open fewer doors and cost more than the public school a few hours away.

I know. And in the worst case scenario, she could commute to Michigan if things got dire for us for some reason. It's a 45 minute drive, but she could try to schedule classes a few days a week. That's a nice fall back option to have and I would only encourage that if things were really dire, but it's an option.

[VandalSquirrel]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

Pretty much. Obviously it's cheaper for in-state kids, but one of the factors in why I didn't apply to Berkeley as school #5 was that, after all was said and done it would have ended up being more expensive than Brown or Emory.

I think the high amount of applications is more of a coastal thing--kids in DC, NYC, Boston, LA, and SF are in a super-competitive pool and they have to cast a wider net. Like I said, in 1998 I applied to 4 schools. In 2008, I interviewed kids who applied to 14. I was in a smaller school district and had an excellent state school to fall back on. The kids I interviewed? Not so much.

Being a San Francisco kid I didn't apply to a lot of schools, I got into Cal and for family reasons applied to schools in Washington and Oregon, and Colorado College. I was so unhappy at Cal, both times I tired it, and I probably would have done fine at Colorado College since it is smaller like Idaho is. The kids from my high school aren't overall applying to a ton of schools as they know CSU and UC schools are always there for them due to credentials. We consistently represent in the Ivies, but not regularly at Stanford. I'll completely own that I started out in a preschool that people try to get on the list for when the stick they peed on turns blue, as did a lot of my classmates K-12, so that is likely a factor into applying to less schools.

Originally Posted by PiKA2001

The fact that so many kids are applying to so many schools now is probably what burned your daughter as well as Dee's with NU. My ex graduated from NU and well, to put it nicely, didn't have anywhere near the credentials that Dee's daughter has.

That's just insane but count me among the generation where applying to more than 4 schools was considered a lot.

I think College Confidential is part of the problem as people put all of their information out there and spend too much time comparing themselves to others. I thought it was a joke how crazy that site is until people actually asked me about moving to Idaho or Alaska to increase the chance their kid will be admitted because it makes them more unique or something. Picking up everything and moving to either of those places for prep school or college admission is really questionable.

[KDCat]

Originally Posted by psusue

Michigan is a great school, internationally recognized as a leader in education and research, and they have school spirit for miles. She'll find her niche in the RC I think and I think soon enough she'll also appreciate not being so far away from home. It sounds all well and good when you're 18, but having a place to come back to when you are tired of dorm food and don't feel like paying for laundry or just want a hug from someone who cares and isn't going to leave you in a year or two is something that cannot exactly be put into words. It's kind of like recruitment in that you end up where you're meant to be. And Michigan has so much diversity in its offerings, she'll find plenty of cultural events, educational programs, and creative outlets that her schedule will be packed and she won't have time to think about much else.

And besides, she can come home for every break and see her friends, she won't miss any family events, and she will graduate with far less debt than if she went further away. And while that may not seem salient now, just tell her that if she graduates with fewer loans she may be able to move full time out to Chicago or D.C. or NYC post-graduation and she can always get internships there for the summers. I don't know, I have a good feeling about her at Michigan. I feel like she'll fit in there, it won't be a pressure cooker like at some schools. I wish her the best luck about Barnard, and I really hope her dream comes true there, but she should know that her second choice is still a really, really great pick. And coming from a rival school, I don't really have a lot of reason to talk it up if it weren't true, now do I?

Michigan is an awesome school. If she wants the far away experience, she should could do a semester abroad. I didn't do a semester abroad and I regret it.

[LAblondeGPhi]

Originally Posted by KDCat

Michigan is an awesome school. If she wants the far away experience, she should could do a semester abroad. I didn't do a semester abroad and I regret it.

I think that going to a major university and living in the dorms DOES give you the "going far away to college" experience.

For years I under-appreciated UCLA because I thought it was too close to home to give me the experience I wanted. I was totally wrong. Once I was in the dorms, living with kids from all over the state (and one or two from other states), being on my own, meeting people with such a variety of experiences, it was like I was living on a different planet from my parents.

As for finances, there's always taking a part-time and summer job. I had a job throughout college, and I had sisters who used their summer jobs to pay for their sorority dues. This is kind of random, but I was a waitress right after college, and I wish that I had started in a restaurant my freshman year. I had a great above-minimum wage campus job that gave me good experience, but waitressing can pay A LOT more, and it was much more flexible than my campus job.

[DubaiSis]

I would also strongly recommend a semester abroad program. I didn't do that, but lived with a family in Paris for a week while in high school. I learned so much in that 1 week, I can't imagine what 3 months would have done. Not just in language immersion but in cultural immersion as well.

[Sciencewoman]

Originally Posted by LAblondeGPhi

I think that going to a major university and living in the dorms DOES give you the "going far away to college" experience.

For years I under-appreciated UCLA because I thought it was too close to home to give me the experience I wanted. I was totally wrong. Once I was in the dorms, living with kids from all over the state (and one or two from other states), being on my own, meeting people with such a variety of experiences, it was like I was living on a different planet from my parents.

My parents had Michigan football season tickets for decades. They'd stop by my dorm on home game Saturdays and pick up my hometown roommate (whose parents also had season tickets) and take us to tailgate with them. Neither one of us felt smothered...we loved seeing our parents "just enough" and having good food on those Saturdays.

By sophomore year we were each living in our respective sororities, and hung out more with our sisters and fraternity tail-gate partners on Saturdays, but I really liked seeing my parents frequently during the fall my freshman year. It did not cramp my style.

[AGDee]

Some people got their Barnard letters today, but primarily people in NYC and NJ. Tomorrow should be the day. I can barely stand it.

[Tulip86]

Originally Posted by AGDee

Some people got their Barnard letters today, but primarily people in NYC and NJ. Tomorrow should be the day. I can barely stand it.

Keeping my fingers and toes crossed!

[Sciencewoman]

Good Luck!!!

[lovespink88]

Crossing fingers and toes for good news for your daughter!

[IrishLake]

NOw I'm sad for both hypo and sciencewomans daughters. My office mate's (APhiA) daughter got accepted to Northwestern, and she's hardly considering it. She also go into Vandy (found out about that one today). She's holding out for Stanford. She got rejected from UVA, which she was really upset about. If Stanford doesn't accept her, she'll probably go to Vanderbuilt because they gave her an amazing financial aid package. But it's like recruitment. She's not thrilled at all about Northwestern (but she prolly would be if she got rejected from there), but there are other students that would love to have her offer letter.

[AGDee]

Yes, but, like recruitment, I think they end up where they are supposed to be Feeling optimistic right now, but between 2:40 and 3:00 this afternoon, I will be on pins and needles waiting to hear from her when she checks the mail.