» GC Stats |
Members: 325,123
Threads: 115,503
Posts: 2,196,037
|
Welcome to our newest member, zsamulpitt5293 |
|
|
|
06-11-2004, 08:51 PM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: On the street where I live
Posts: 1,863
|
|
Changing your name
Today at work we talked about women changing their last name after marriage. It got interesting, to say the least.
My question(s):
GUYS: If you are married, did your wife change her name? If so, was it a mutual decision. If not, how do you feel about it?
GIRLS: If you are married, did you change your name? Why or why not?
BOTH: Do you believe that women should their name? Why?
|
06-11-2004, 10:02 PM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: WWJMD?
Posts: 7,559
|
|
I did not change my name when I got married, and I won't change it when/if I get married again. It wasn't even an issue for me and it didn't even occur to me to think about changing it -- in my opinion, there is not one good reason to do it.
I believe that a woman should do whatever she wants -- it's completely an individual decision, and she should do what she prefers.
__________________
A hiney bird is a bird that flies in perfectly executed, concentric circles until it eventually flies up its own behind and poof! disappears forever....
-Ken Harrelson
|
06-11-2004, 10:08 PM
|
|
Super Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Counting my blessings!
Posts: 30,468
|
|
Quote:
Originally posted by valkyrie
I believe that a woman should do whatever she wants -- it's completely an individual decision, and she should do what she prefers.
|
Cosign!!
__________________
~ *~"ADPi"~*~
♥Proud to be a Macon Magnolia ♥
"He who is not busy being born is busy dying." Bob Dylan
|
06-11-2004, 10:46 PM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 4,729
|
|
Quote:
Originally posted by valkyrie
I did not change my name when I got married, and I won't change it when/if I get married again. It wasn't even an issue for me and it didn't even occur to me to think about changing it -- in my opinion, there is not one good reason to do it.
I believe that a woman should do whatever she wants -- it's completely an individual decision, and she should do what she prefers.
|
Concur
I already have a hyphenated name (and no, it's not because I've prviously been married), and I'll likely keep *half* of my name and then take on my husband's name, as well.
I also agree that it's a very personal an individual decision, and something to think about before getting married.
Just my .02
__________________
ADP First. Finest. Forever. Since 1851. Valparaiso Crusaders
|
06-11-2004, 11:09 PM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: In the deep south (and there's no place I'd rather be)
Posts: 433
|
|
I'm a traditionalist... i plan on changing mine.
However, I do feel that its a personal decision. Everybodies different. What works for one person may not work for the next.
|
06-11-2004, 11:16 PM
|
Super Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 13,797
|
|
I hyphenated for a couple of years. I had done a great deal of horticultural research under my maiden name and didn't want to suddenly disappear; also, my mother-in-law worked on campus and she too was Mrs. ___ _____.
However, my hyphenated name was so long and cumbersome that I finally gave up doing it and just used my maiden name as much as possible. I found that since I was using Dr. and my mother-in-law was using Mrs., we didn't get confused much after all.
|
06-11-2004, 11:35 PM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: chicago, il
Posts: 5,112
|
|
i am old fashioned. i think that a woman should change her name.
i know that what i say doesnt matter cause women can do whatever the heck that they want. but i think that it is important to take on the name of the male.
__________________
alpha delta pi
|
06-11-2004, 11:45 PM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 4,006
|
|
If/When I marry, I'm going to keep my maiden name as a middle name and take my husband's name as my last name.
|
06-11-2004, 11:52 PM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: WWJMD?
Posts: 7,559
|
|
Quote:
Originally posted by smiley21
i know that what i say doesnt matter cause women can do whatever the heck that they want. but i think that it is important to take on the name of the male.
|
I'm curious -- why?
__________________
A hiney bird is a bird that flies in perfectly executed, concentric circles until it eventually flies up its own behind and poof! disappears forever....
-Ken Harrelson
|
06-11-2004, 11:58 PM
|
|
I'm changing mine. Never even considered not changing it. I want everyone in my family to have the same name.... I've meet too many families where the mom, the dad, and each of the kids all have different names. It's too confusing.
Besides, his last name is so much easier, in my case
|
06-11-2004, 11:59 PM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Denver
Posts: 340
|
|
I have a really, uhmmm, interesting last name. It's been my identity for so long I can't really see giving it up. I think I would plan on hyphenating assuming his last name didn't look too weird with mine in which case I won't use his.
The only complication is kids. Assuming you have children and they take his name it would be strange to at least not be using the hyphenate. Honestly, I can also see myself giving up on the hyphenate if there's several years and a kid or two involved. As non feminist as that sounds I think that's how it will go down realistically.
|
06-12-2004, 12:54 AM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Alabama
Posts: 298
|
|
Quote:
Originally posted by Taualumna
If/When I marry, I'm going to keep my maiden name as a middle name and take my husband's name as my last name.
|
Thank you for being the voice of sanity! My pet peeve is people who don't do this once they are married! Unless you go by your original middle name, you should drop it and use your maiden name as your middle name if you intend to take your husband's last name.
[/rant]
Anyway, as far as the way I feel on the subject, it doesn't really matter to me what a woman chooses about her last name once she gets married. If I ever decide to get married, I intend to keep my maiden name, because of my extreme feminist principles. (Notice the "IF" prefix of that statement, LOL.) Even bigger IF I decide to have children, they will have a hypenated last name.
Also, not many last names sound really good with Randi!
__________________
Delta Zeta
|
06-12-2004, 01:15 AM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Music City
Posts: 2,176
|
|
Whenever I get married, I'm planning on dropping my maiden name, and keeping my middle name, and using his last name.
__________________
DGAlumna
WAR EAGLE!!!
|
06-12-2004, 02:12 AM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 3,464
|
|
Quote:
Originally posted by twhrider13
Thank you for being the voice of sanity! My pet peeve is people who don't do this once they are married! Unless you go by your original middle name, you should drop it and use your maiden name as your middle name if you intend to take your husband's last name.
|
May I ask why? Some maiden names (mine included) are too cumbersome to use as a middle name.
I took my husband's name and dropped my maiden name completely. Why? I wanted to. I felt no strong attachment to my maiden name (not strong enough to keep it anyway). It's long and difficult to spell and pronounce where my husband's is easier. I did not have an established career where people would know me specifially by my maiden name. I want all our family to have the same name when we have children. To me taking your husband's last name is not giving up your identity or compromising who you are, it's not a sign that my husband "owns" me; it's upholding the agreement you make in your marriage vows to become one.
Then again my vows also included the word "obey" and I had no problem with that, either. And believe me, I am a strong-willed, intelligent, independent woman, not a 1950's throwback to June Cleaver.
__________________
It's gonna be a hootenanny.
Or maybe a jamboree.
Or possibly even a shindig or lollapalooza.
Perhaps it'll be a hootshinpaloozaree. I don't know.
|
06-12-2004, 02:43 AM
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Puget Sound, WA
Posts: 4,289
|
|
Personally I just think it's a pain in the you know what to change my name after all these years (all of that paperwork). I'm 34 and god knows what age I'll be when (or if) I finally get married. I've been known by this name so long, why change it.
But I also don't see it as being any big deal. Like they say "a rose by any other name would smell as sweet".
__________________
GFB
Founded Upon a Rock....
Connect. Impact. Shine
|
|
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
|