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02-08-2005, 09:57 PM
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The "What If?" Sororities
There have been a lot of threads on where everyone preffed, but the one question I always had was the "what if" sorority.
Was there a sorority whose pref party - or earlier - you didn't attend, and later wondered if you should have do so?
Obviously, this is for women whose system had more than 2-3 sororities.
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♥Proud to be a Macon Magnolia ♥
"He who is not busy being born is busy dying." Bob Dylan
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02-08-2005, 10:59 PM
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There were several "what if" sororities for me. Stupidly, I cut a ton of sororities after first parties because I was sure I wanted to be a Pi Phi. And I'm glad I am one but I still can't believe that as a junior PNM, I just blithely cut all those groups--who knows what friends I could've made? And what if Pi Phi had cut me?
I also turned down a COB bid my sophomore year. Who knows what might have come from that?
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02-08-2005, 11:09 PM
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I did the same thing after the first round - I wanted ADP or KKG, and didn't realize that I may be cut from either(I was a freshman, btw)! If I had to do it all over again, I would have given two others (KAQ & DZ) a better look. Both were stellar sororities (DZ still is!), and had invited me back.
I also made my decision based mostly on the seniors, who of course were gone by the next year. I think that's when I started to wonder, "what if...?" But in the end, I was meant to be an ADPi - as has been said, my blood runs azure blue & white!
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~ *~"ADPi"~*~
♥Proud to be a Macon Magnolia ♥
"He who is not busy being born is busy dying." Bob Dylan
Last edited by honeychile; 02-09-2005 at 12:29 AM.
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02-08-2005, 11:21 PM
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There have been two what if's for me:
- What if I finished up with the local that I originally was pledging? Would I be happy? Would I regret it? Would I still be active, or as active as I am now?
- What if ΑΕΦ gave me a bid? Would I be happy?
- What if I found ΣΔΤ in the fall of my freshman year and pledged then? My whole expirence would have been veryt diffrent, and it makes me wonder what I would be like right now
However I think I was meant to be a Sig Delt and I can't be happier then I am. My sisters have taught me a lot and they really have shown me sisterhood.
I ♥ my sisters!
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Last edited by Buttonz; 02-09-2005 at 10:38 AM.
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02-08-2005, 11:33 PM
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what if I hadn't filled out my pref card even though I got cut before final round?
what if I had been invited to TEM or Kappa Phi Omega for final party and felt i needed to sign them?
what if TD hadn't wanted to bid me?
what if I hadn't accepted TD's bid because I was offended ?
But I'm damn glad I did accept and I love my sisters. You know your in the right sorority when your president farts in front of you on the first night of pledging.
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02-08-2005, 11:36 PM
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I rarely thing about the "what if?" questions because I am so happy at Pi Phi, but I guess there are a couple.
- What if I had gone to the KKG pref party instead of turning down their invitation? Would I have signed there?
- What if I hadn't intentionally single preferenced ("suicided") Pi Phi? I went to the AXD pref party and decided that it wasn't for me, but what if I had put them second on my list?
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02-08-2005, 11:40 PM
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This isn't really a pref story, but I'm going to post it anyway...
When I was in undergraduate school, I went through rush. At the time the system wasn't integrated, and I was dropped from 4 of the 5 houses on campus. I was getting ready to go back to the one house that invited me back when a "friend" of mine told me that the only reason the chapter invited me back was because they lost the picture that was attached to my application, and didn't think it would be fair to cut me. It hurt hearing that, so I decided to drop completely out of recruitment. I wondered for YEARS what might have happened if I'd decided to stick it out - what if I had gone through it? What if I'd been given a bid to that chapter? What if I'd been initiated in college instead of as an alumna?
Years later when I was going through alumnae initiation, I contacted the Vancouver alumnae chapter of this organization. Almost 15 years had gone by since my disastrous rush, but I still had lots of love for this organization. I agonized over my decision, but ultimately I chose Alpha Phi (and Alpha Phi chose me). I now know without a doubt that I'm exactly where I belong, but from time to time, I still wonder "What if I'd become an AOII?"
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02-09-2005, 12:12 AM
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These aren't really "what if's" about particular sororities, just things I wonder about from time to time:
*What if I'd done formal rush freshman year? What sorority would I have ended up in? Would I enjoy it as much as I enjoy Sigma?
*What if I'd continued to think that I couldn't join an NPC sorority because I was black?
*What if I'd joined Sigma earlier? Would I still love it as much as I do now?
*What if I hadn't gotten a bid at ALL? I knew I wanted to join a sorority and that I wanted it to be a big part of my collegiate life. I would've been VERY upset if I hadn't.
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Last edited by KSUViolet06; 02-11-2005 at 03:52 PM.
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02-09-2005, 02:10 AM
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My "what if" is more general - in that "what if I'd gone through formal recruitment as a freshman?" Would I have wound up joining the same sorority that all my friends from freshman year wound up joining by the end of our first semester of sophomore year?
While I still have a great respect and love for that organization (considering I had gone into formal recruitment as a sophomore hoping I'd be a member by the end of the week), I now know that ADPi was the only place for me to be, and the only place that I feel that I would have grown into the person I am today, versus who I'd be if I was a member of any other organization.
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02-09-2005, 08:27 AM
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My only "what if" was pretty big: what if I had been able to go through formal recruitment? Would I still have been an AOII? I certainly hope so, but will never know. Luckily, I have no regrets about the choices I made as a blissfully young 17 year old girl.
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02-09-2005, 08:31 AM
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My main "what if" is "what if" i would've rushed spring of my freshman year instead of fall of my sophomore year. I had seen flyers for KD informal recruitment but was a little shy about just randomly calling up and saying hey, I wanna come!
I guess I also wonder what if I didn't get a bid to KD... there really wasn't any other houses that I could see myself in when I went through recruitment.
But I do wonder how I could've changed some of those houses. Heck, I briefly entertained the idea of joining Kappa Alpha Theta (who ended up closing later on in the semester after my fall rush) and rebuilding it. Even the other house that I preffed, I really don't think I could've been a sister there... and seeing how that house has been since then, I'm glad that I didn't.
I think I also wonder what if instead of having the f'ed up formal/informal hybrid (open parties, come and go as you pleased, no cuts until pref invites were handed out), how I would've fared had we done the formal structured recruitment that they do now with cuts every round.
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02-09-2005, 09:10 AM
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What if I hadn't dropped out of formal rush before pref?
Out of 4 NPC sororities on campus at the time, I'd gone back to two for second round. I came out of that round interested in being part of a sisterhood, but not really feeling that either of those two sororities (or, for that matter, either of the other two) was quite the right fit for me. So I dropped out, never picking up my pref invites.
The following week, I rushed the only local sorority on campus, and found my home.
It's for the best. I have great sisters. Plus, one of the two sororities I'd gone back to had fully half of their pledge class from my year deaffiliate before graduation.
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02-09-2005, 09:25 AM
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My what ifs are- What if I had gone to ASTs pref? I was given a snap bid, but I often wonder if I had gone to ASTs pref., how I would have ranked the other two and if I would have put AST on my pref. card (which I didn't)?
Also, wonder what would have happen had I gone through with a more open mind, and not let my roommate and friends influence my opinions on the sororities.
But I am happy where I am, but there will always be what ifs..
My huge non-pref what if, is What if I hadn't depinned? How would things be different? Would I value AST as much as I do now, since I have been reinstated as a sister.
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02-09-2005, 09:28 AM
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My what-if is slightly different.
What if I had joined the other local sorority on campus that I really liked (even better than the one I ended up joining!)? I actually would have been happier. But if I had joined that sorority I would not have found AOII because I could have been a more active alum (and just kept in touch with sisters) and would have not pursued AI.
Things definitely work out for a reason and I'm SO happy to have AOII!!
As a side note to the rushing at my undergrad school, back in the day it wasn't really formal rush - more of a COB-formal hybrid (you had rounds but no cutting so you had to go to all 4 groups). First semester freshmen can go through rush but they can not pledge. Basically this allows freshmen to meet the groups. 2nd semester freshmen can pledge. The group I really liked didn't give me a bid second semester because they thought I was definitely going with what turned out to be the only sorority that gave me a bid. Moral of the story - don't make up someone's mind for them - if you like them and want them to be a sister, give them a bid!
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02-09-2005, 09:28 AM
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My big "what ifs" are from freshman year. I received a bid from Alpha Xi Delta, but I knew in my heart it wasn't my home. I'd fallen in love with two other sororities on my campus, and I was sad. I also wonder what would've been different had I been a founder or my sorority instead of in the first new member class... if I would have been friends with different people, if my family would have been different. I knew Alpha Chi was my home, though. I'd researched all over the internet, and when I heard they were presenting at my school, I was so excited for them to come. Something about Alpha Chi just seemed right to me. Basically, I have LOTS of what-ifs but no regrets
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