FSU Recruitment

cluelessmom · #1 08-23-2015, 10:02 PM

It has been a crazy week of ups and downs for my daughter... and me!

My kid was not prepared for the level of competition in recruitment. We found this site much too late! Today was a little bittersweet for her as she received a bid from her second choice. She was convinced she was getting one from her first choice after pref yesterday...as was every girl, I'm sure!

However, she really liked all of her pref choices, so, after a few hours at the new house, she was happy. There were just so many girls who were cut, or who decided to drop, that she knew how lucky she was to even have a chapter she liked throughout the process offer her a bid today!

Many many life lessons have been learned this week! Good luck to all the new FSU pledges!

LIXO · #2 08-23-2015, 10:04 PM

I am glad she found a home and wish her much happiness and personal growth!

AnchorAlum · #3 08-23-2015, 11:27 PM

Would love to hear more about FSU Rush - and very glad to hear that your daughter has found a home!!!

cluelessmom · #4 08-24-2015, 12:52 AM

This is from an out of state, transfer perspective!

My kid didn't know much at all about house reputations before this week. She did watch videos, look at tumblr pages, etc. before move in but didn't actually talk to anyone and she wanted to keep it that way.

Orientation was eye-opening for her. SO MANY GIRLS!! There were quite a few girls who believed they would be getting bids to certain houses and happily stated that. There were a handful of girls happy to talk about what they believed to be the reputation of each house. One quote from that evening: "Why would you want to be a ____? Do you want to be known as a s***?" The Rho Gams tried to shut all the talk down but it was rampant.

Her group was mostly an open-minded good group of girls aside from one who believed she was "destined for top-tier". First round was exhausting but most girls liked most houses. Recs are definitely important, at least to get through round 1, if not more. Some of her group and others she heard about were cut pretty heavily.

Second round tent talk continued like crazy. "OMG! Why do these girls keep inviting me back?!?! I dropped them!!" etc etc My personal favorite: "Ewwww! You LIKE them?? Why?? They are SO lower tier!" My daughter's response: "They're nice girls and I'm looking for friends."

Third round, my daughter was disappointed to be cut by three houses she really liked but still had a few she really liked so she rallied. By the end of that day, one that was a no turned into a maybe. Another that was a no turned into a yes. (That one was originally a no because they called her the wrong name twice even with her nametag on!) Another that was a no remained a no because no one picked her up at the door for almost 5 minutes.

Pref invite day was a disaster for her group. She was the only one who received her top three. Everyone else was crying...sobbing. She thinks there were three girls who were cut although it's possible they dropped. A few others dropped, so her original group of 17 was down to 10 and that was before the pref parties. She had later parties so she spent a lot of time talking people into giving the chapters a chance. "You've spent every day getting up at 6 am, exhausting yourself going to all these parties, and you're going to quit?! Don't do it. You're already ready. Just check it out! You have nothing to lose!"

I didn't ask her how many of her group were left today BUT there were a few fairly unhappy people who she knew. One girl she knew had received a bid from her third choice and wanted to drop immediately. (why she put them on her bid card, I don't know) The girl actually called her mom crying from THE HOUSE! From things I've read, I'm sure she wasn't the only one who did that today.

I truly hope these girls figure out it's about sisterhood, and honestly if they've signed their bid card, they need to at least give it a shot. My daughter definitely had her own ups and downs throughout this process even though I prepped her beforehand. Overall, I think she handled it well and I'm hopeful she connects with her pledge class and new house quickly!

Being from out of state, she knew almost no one and no one in any house and THAT is a huge disadvantage at a state school. Everyone she talked to had people who were "vouching" for them in various houses and of course, that's true. Never underestimate the power of networking. She did decide in the round before prefs to tell the houses she liked how much she liked them even though she had been advised to wait for prefs to do that. Did that make the difference? She'll never know but it felt like her only shot to compete with the girls who were friends with the actives!

AnchorAlumna · #5 08-24-2015, 01:06 AM

Wow, your D was incredibly brave and compassionate. Mom, you did a great job raising her!
FSU is one of the most competitive recruitments in the nation. She did very, very well.

FSUZeta · #6 08-24-2015, 06:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna

Wow, your D was incredibly brave and compassionate. Mom, you did a great job raising her!
FSU is one of the most competitive recruitments in the nation. She did very, very well.

This! I believe sometimes being from OOS can be an advantage attitude wise. Coming in with no preconceived notions about the groups, willing to go with the flow certainly served your daughter well. I hope she has a fabulous 4years with her sisters and as a Nole!

carnation · #7 08-24-2015, 07:02 AM

Cluelessmom, you and your daughter sound like fine women!

Nanners52674 · #8 08-24-2015, 08:33 AM

Such a great story! So glad your D not only stuck it out but was able to be there for the girls she met during the week.

You don't have to but I'd love to know where she joined!

Congrats to both her and you.

NorthernMom · #9 08-24-2015, 09:37 AM

Yes....your daughter sounds like a great young woman who is not afraid to think for herself.

I grow so tired of hearing about these entitled girls who come into college.....essentially looking to extend what they believed to be the fabulousness of their HS careers....and subsequently look down upon women, who in many way offer much more to the world than they do. All because they didn't get what they believed to be one of the top tier sororities.

cluelessmom · #10 08-24-2015, 09:50 AM

Thank you, everyone! She is a pretty level-headed kid when it comes to things like this. I think it has been a huge help over the years that she has tried out for various teams and been cut by some and made a few. I never thought I'd be thankful for the teams she was cut from for reasons other than skill, but that's the position I am in today! Honestly, I don't know much about sorority selection but I do know it's not a level playing field. People are legacies; people have connections, etc. ...very similar to sports teams, someone's parent volunteers all their time for an organization. or someone's parent is lifelong best friends with the coach or director, etc. Life isn't a level playing field! When you have disappointment early, you are definitely better prepared for that. Bad things will happen and it's not the bad things that define you. It's all about how you perceive it and how you deal with it. Bloom where you are planted!

By the way, I helicopter with the best of them! It's just that this particular aspect of her life really worked out well for her!

cluelessmom · #11 08-24-2015, 09:54 AM

I agree, Northernmom!! There seemed to be no shortage of entitlement! Meanwhile, my kid was looking for "girls like her lunch table". I honestly don't see any other point to being in a sorority...it has to be about friendship, doesn't it?

Anyway, I'm thankful for the way it all turned out and extremely thankful she made it through FSU recruitment relatively unscathed and with a home!

KerriMarie · #12 08-24-2015, 10:33 AM

Congrats to your daughter! I went to Florida State - but skipped formal recruitment and joined a smaller sorority during spring recruitment. I was from out of state and I don't do well in large loud social situations - I never would have made it through formal recruitment, and it's only gotten crazier in the years since I've left.

Sounds like your daughter had an open mind and a successful recruitment because of it!

Go Noles!

AZTheta · #13 08-24-2015, 11:11 AM

cluelessmom, I completely agree with you that your daughter's advantage was that she's faced disappointments prior to recruitment. I've said that on this site many times (essentially what you wrote a few posts above). Wherever she landed, I predict she'll thrive, and I hope she enjoys a lifetime of membership (not just in her sorority, but with all of us who are Greek).

Didn't pick up the helicopter vibe from you at all.

AnchorAlum · #14 08-24-2015, 01:31 PM

As a Florida State alum, I think others will share my perspective that by the time you are a senior, you have friends in many of the different houses and from your first dorm and it just adds to the overall experience. FSU's Greek system is so strong that there are terrific women in every house and I know that from experience - I doubt it's changed all these years later.
Go Noles!

Jill1228 · #15 08-24-2015, 04:02 PM

My rec girl (who was a double legacy to a sorority on that campus) dropped out of recruitment