GreekChat.com Forums  

Go Back   GreekChat.com Forums > Recruitment > Sorority Recruitment

Sorority Recruitment Recruitment event and bid day ideas, membership retention, publicity, recruitment policies, etc.


Register Now for FREE!
Join GreekChat.com, The Fraternity & Sorority Greek Chat Network. To sign up for your FREE account INSTANTLY fill out the form below!

Username: Password: Confirm Password: E-Mail: Confirm E-Mail:
 
Image Verification
Please enter the six letters or digits that appear in the image opposite.

  I agree to forum rules 

» GC Stats
Members: 325,125
Threads: 115,503
Posts: 2,196,056
Welcome to our newest member, PiperJarma
» Online Users: 686
0 members and 686 guests
No Members online
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #76  
Old 02-17-2013, 10:54 PM
MaryPoppins MaryPoppins is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Yoknapatawpha
Posts: 1,781
We have seen women coming through at Ole Miss with several DUIs on their records. Sometimes those are on the letters of reference and sometimes not.
__________________
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow, Kappa Alpha Theta exists to nurture each member throughout her college and alumna experience and to
offer a lifelong opportunity for social, intellectual, and moral growth as she meets the higher and broader demands of a mature life.
Reply With Quote
  #77  
Old 02-17-2013, 10:56 PM
Titchou Titchou is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 4,575
Quote:
Originally Posted by IUHoosiergirl88 View Post
Maybe I'm not worthy of understanding these Southern pearl clutching issues, but why would I care if someone's parent was found guilty of murder or something of that nature? That PNM may be estranged from that family member and likely has little to no connection to that individual at that point. It's not as if that PNM was the murderer! Perhaps that PNM wanted a new start away from those issues. What if the PNM had been a victim of domestic violence and the rec writer mentioned that?

In addition, how does the active know which to believe--the alum or the PNM? She likely does not know you from Sally Smith, and while you are a sister of her sorority, that doesn't necessarily mean that she trusts your information to be 100% accurate either.
Thank God I have a double strand to clutch! Seriously though, it is different for us "old world" folks. We would know if they were estranged from that family member. And the chapters who really use recs know who their alums are and who writes good recs and who doesn't. I've worked many a back room at recruitment time in the SEC and without giving away MS information I can tell you that we can tell and we know and we discount some and some we give more "weight" to. It's not just filling in a blank with us. I know that's hard to understand for some people but for us, we've lived it all our lives and it's just part of the culture.
Reply With Quote
  #78  
Old 02-17-2013, 10:58 PM
Hartofsec Hartofsec is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 705
Quote:
Originally Posted by IUHoosiergirl88 View Post
Maybe I'm not worthy of understanding these Southern pearl clutching issues, but why would I care if someone's parent was found guilty of murder or something of that nature? That PNM may be estranged from that family member and likely has little to no connection to that individual at that point. It's not as if that PNM was the murderer! Perhaps that PNM wanted a new start away from those issues. What if the PNM had been a victim of domestic violence and the rec writer mentioned that?

In addition, how does the active know which to believe--the alum or the PNM? She likely does not know you from Sally Smith, and while you are a sister of her sorority, that doesn't necessarily mean that she trusts your information to be 100% accurate either.
Good points -- a PNM like that could probably really use a mentor or alum in her corner to advocate instead of send a negative rec.
Reply With Quote
  #79  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:00 PM
MaryPoppins MaryPoppins is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Yoknapatawpha
Posts: 1,781
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou View Post
I can tell you that we can tell and we know and we discount some and some we give more "weight" to. It's not just filling in a blank with us. I know that's hard to understand for some people but for us, we've lived it all our lives and it's just part of the culture.
This.
__________________
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow, Kappa Alpha Theta exists to nurture each member throughout her college and alumna experience and to
offer a lifelong opportunity for social, intellectual, and moral growth as she meets the higher and broader demands of a mature life.
Reply With Quote
  #80  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:00 PM
Titchou Titchou is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 4,575
Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryPoppins View Post
We have seen women coming through at Ole Miss with several DUIs on their records. Sometimes those are on the letters of reference and sometimes not.
And then there was the PNM from great suburb in major southern city going thru recruitment at large SEC school who was hauled away from HS in handcuffs by the sheriff - and very well docmented to me...and the world if they just wanted to look. I wrote a no rec on her....both years she went thru recruitment. Obviously everyone else did too because she was dropped by all groups both years - including mine in spite of heavy lobbying of me by the the vp:recruitment as the girl had friends in the chapter. I stood my ground, they accepted it, and were glad they listened to me when no one else took her either.
Reply With Quote
  #81  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:03 PM
Hartofsec Hartofsec is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 705
Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryPoppins View Post
We have seen women coming through at Ole Miss with several DUIs on their records. Sometimes those are on the letters of reference and sometimes not.
Just wondering -- how do they fare in rush?
Reply With Quote
  #82  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:06 PM
MaryPoppins MaryPoppins is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Yoknapatawpha
Posts: 1,781
Titchou, know what you mean, choufleur. HartofSEC, I didn't ask at the time but when I see the MS Advisor I will ask if she knows what happened. From what I recall we released them.
__________________
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow, Kappa Alpha Theta exists to nurture each member throughout her college and alumna experience and to
offer a lifelong opportunity for social, intellectual, and moral growth as she meets the higher and broader demands of a mature life.

Last edited by MaryPoppins; 02-17-2013 at 11:09 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #83  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:09 PM
Hartofsec Hartofsec is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 705
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou View Post
And then there was the PNM from great suburb in major southern city going thru recruitment at large SEC school who was hauled away from HS in handcuffs by the sheriff - and very well docmented to me...and the world if they just wanted to look. I wrote a no rec on her....both years she went thru recruitment. Obviously everyone else did too because she was dropped by all groups both years - including mine in spite of heavy lobbying of me by the the vp:recruitment as the girl had friends in the chapter. I stood my ground, they accepted it, and were glad they listened to me when no one else took her either.
It sounds like you did the right thing by standing your ground on that one.

I remember my first time on the active side of rush -- actives howling to keep an adorable girl who had a C high school GPA. And I remember the chapter advisors explaining that we needed to pledge girls who would stay afloat and be successful in college. I also remember thinking they were kind of mean about it, since this girl's friends wanted to pledge her so badly. Lots of tears.

As it turned out, the alums were right. She pledged elsewhere, and was in school for one semester.

Last edited by Hartofsec; 02-17-2013 at 11:28 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #84  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:27 PM
ASTalumna06 ASTalumna06 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Queens, NY
Posts: 6,290
Quote:
Originally Posted by IUHoosiergirl88 View Post
Maybe I'm not worthy of understanding these Southern pearl clutching issues, but why would I care if someone's parent was found guilty of murder or something of that nature? That PNM may be estranged from that family member and likely has little to no connection to that individual at that point. It's not as if that PNM was the murderer! Perhaps that PNM wanted a new start away from those issues. What if the PNM had been a victim of domestic violence and the rec writer mentioned that?
Exactly. I feel as though holding something against the PNM that actually has nothing to do with them or their character is going a bit too far. I have some family members who have done some things that I wouldn't like advertised. You don't get to choose your family, and you definitely can't control their actions.

I would like to think I'm pretty awesome and I wouldn't want something that a family member did to hold any weight over whether or not I was offered a bid.
__________________
I believe in the values of friendship and fidelity to purpose

@~/~~~~
Reply With Quote
  #85  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:32 PM
MaryPoppins MaryPoppins is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Yoknapatawpha
Posts: 1,781
Quote:
Originally Posted by ASTalumna06 View Post
I would like to think I'm pretty awesome and I wouldn't want something that a family member did to hold any weight over whether or not I was offered a bid.
This is why some young Southern women end pledging far from home, and not just because the academic scholarship was right.
__________________
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow, Kappa Alpha Theta exists to nurture each member throughout her college and alumna experience and to
offer a lifelong opportunity for social, intellectual, and moral growth as she meets the higher and broader demands of a mature life.
Reply With Quote
  #86  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:33 PM
adpiucf adpiucf is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: I can't seem to keep track!
Posts: 5,803
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hartofsec View Post

I remember my first time on the active side of rush -- actives howling to keep an adorable girl who had a C high school GPA. And I remember the chapter advisors explaining that we needed to pledge girls who would stay afloat and be successful in college. I also remember thinking they were kind of mean about it, since this girl's friends wanted to pledge her so badly. Lots of tears.

As it turned out, the alums were right. She pledged elsewhere, and was in school for one semester.
I've never had a good experience pledging a grade risk. Every year we took a chance on one because she was so popular, and every year we'd lose her because she failed out of school. Has anyone had an opposite experience where someone with low grades managed to thrive academically once she pledged?
__________________
Click here for some helpful information about sorority recruitment and recommendations.
Reply With Quote
  #87  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:33 PM
DubaiSis DubaiSis is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Back in the Heartland
Posts: 5,424
But if the alums are so important to the process (and it sounds like only when IN PERSON), then why not formalize that process and eliminate the recs that are so fraught with problems?
__________________
"Traveling - It leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller. ~ Ibn Battuta
Reply With Quote
  #88  
Old 02-17-2013, 11:54 PM
Hartofsec Hartofsec is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 705
Quote:
Originally Posted by DubaiSis View Post
But if the alums are so important to the process (and it sounds like only when IN PERSON), then why not formalize that process and eliminate the recs that are so fraught with problems?
That's an interesting question. I certainly wouldn't want to discount the wisdom of the alums involved with recruitment, but I assume that even chapters where recs are not the norm have knowledgeable chapter advisors involved in person.

I guess my overall question might be -- how different is the end result (pledge class) of the XYZ chapter at Big Southern University, where recs are absolutely necessary, from the XYZ chapter at Northern U, where recs are not the norm?

Last edited by Hartofsec; 02-18-2013 at 12:17 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #89  
Old 02-18-2013, 12:53 AM
DubaiSis DubaiSis is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Back in the Heartland
Posts: 5,424
I don't think there IS a difference. That's why us yankees think the whole process is just silly. And you can't use number of rushees or number of chapters as a reason. Most of the Big 10 is comparable or larger in number of rushees, although in general there are more chapters at the Big 10 schools so it's spread out a little more. You also can't use age of the chapters as a reason because most of the oldest chapters are Midwestern or Northern. I think the southern chapters didn't really kick off until the 20th century for some obvious reasons.

I can accept that there is a fear of no longer relying on recommendations, but, just as RFM didn't kill sororities, eliminating this tedious step also wouldn't. But that being said, I still think there IS a role for alumnae. I just don't think paperwork is where it's at.
__________________
"Traveling - It leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller. ~ Ibn Battuta
Reply With Quote
  #90  
Old 02-18-2013, 01:06 AM
adpiucf adpiucf is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: I can't seem to keep track!
Posts: 5,803
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hartofsec View Post
I guess my overall question might be -- how different is the end result (pledge class) of the XYZ chapter at Big Southern University, where recs are absolutely necessary, from the XYZ chapter at Northern U, where recs are not the norm?
None. The chapter gets the girls it wants either way. I don't think the recs make a lick of difference. At the end of the day, the chapter will pledge well qualified women with great resumes whose personalities are compatible with the chapter. The recommendation has outlived its usefulness because it is no longer a true recommendation. It's an under the table prereq to try to avoid disqualification, and that is surely not how they were intended by our organizations. It's now just a nuisance for the collegians to process and for PNMs to fuss over. I think it has lasted this long because it is the only significant thing linking massive numbers of alumnae to sorority life.

I still believe recommendations can be valuable when they are made by someone who knows a PNM well, and there should be some type of alumnae vetting prior to initiation. However, with respect to rec-heavy schools, even they have to agree the situation is out of control and lends itself to added hype and hysteria.
__________________
Click here for some helpful information about sorority recruitment and recommendations.

Last edited by adpiucf; 02-18-2013 at 01:09 AM.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Schools where you absolutely positively need recs violetpretty Sorority Recruitment 485 10-01-2020 09:41 AM
What Absolutely NOT to have on Facebook DZsis&mom Sorority Recruitment 40 05-09-2012 06:36 PM
To what schools are you sending recs? SWTXBelle Sorority Recruitment 16 06-15-2010 11:45 PM
actives from other schools writing recs? rebelgirl89 Sorority Recruitment 8 06-25-2008 02:23 PM
Absolutely Fabulous! KillarneyRose Entertainment 2 11-11-2001 11:03 AM



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:23 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.