Sorority Shopping?

[jessikay1922]

Originally Posted by kddani

I think you're misinterpreting that. I think everyone has encouraged PNAM's to do their research before doing anything, but some start contact with multiple orgs all at once, not one at a time.

And when they contact them, its not just to do community service or something like that, but to actually pursue membership? Is that the issue?

[kddani]

Originally Posted by jessikay1922

And when they contact them, its not just to do community service or something like that, but to actually pursue membership? Is that the issue?

Yeppers.

[jessikay1922]

Originally Posted by kddani

Yeppers.

OKAYYYYYYYYYYYY! Now I get it, I guess.

The only nagging thing in my head is about rush for undergrads..... If I was interested in NPC groups in college, but did not pursue membership for whatever reason, is it unreasonable to believe that if I heard of AI, I would think that it was ok to contact more than one group at a time?????

[CutiePie2000]

Originally Posted by rho4life

It just strikes me as odd that the NPC'ers don't want potential AI's to look at the different orgs before taking the plunge.

If someone's Mom was a Sorority A and their Sister went Sorority B, then I can understand that they might want to look at both, as they have ties to both.

I think where some of us take exception, is where someone has no previous ties to a group and basically "shops" around to as many groups as it takes, until they find one that will accept them. When someone says, "I want to be an ABC, but I don't know anyone in that group", I find that a bit suspect.
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And on a side note, I'm really glad that some NPHC ladies have come onto this thread and commented/shared. I always welcome the opportunity to learn things from them. So, thank you for that.

[OtterXO]

Originally Posted by jessikay1922

The only nagging thing in my head is about rush for undergrads..... If I was interested in NPC groups in college, but did not pursue membership for whatever reason, is it unreasonable to believe that if I heard of AI, I would think that it was ok to contact more than one group at a time?????

I can't think of how to say this any better, so here it goes. AI is NOT like rush for undergrads. Yes, sorority membership is for life, however, for 99.99999999999% of sorority women sorority life starts in college. That fraction of a percent who join through AI *should* (in my opinion) only join based on some sort of tie that was present prior to her deciding to become an alumnae initiate. So if you look at it as the same thing as undergrad rush, you're already headed down the wrong path.

ETA: I hope that makes sense!

[OtterXO]

Originally Posted by CutiePie2000

I think where some of us take exception, is where someone has no previous ties to a group and basically "shops" around to as many groups as it takes, until they find one that will accept them. When someone says, "I want to be an ABC, but I don't know anyone in that group", I find that a bit suspect.

I couldn't agree with you more.

[jessikay1922]

Originally Posted by OtterXO

I can't think of how to say this any better, so here it goes. AI is NOT like rush for undergrads. Yes, sorority membership is for life, however, for 99.99999999999% of sorority women sorority life starts in college. That fraction of a percent who join through AI *should* (in my opinion) only join based on some sort of tie that was present prior to her deciding to become an alumnae initiate. So if you look at it as the same thing as undergrad rush, you're already headed down the wrong path.

That wasn't the question I was asking. What I was asking was if you did not know any better--- hadn't seen this thread for example--- and the only thing you had been exposed to was undergrad rush for NPC--- is it not possible that you would think that there was nothing wrong with approaching more than one group?


I don't know the answer to that question. You might not either. (And pursuing NPHC membership on both levels is a lot more similar than NPC membership it seems.)

[OtterXO]

Originally Posted by jessikay1922

That wasn't the question I was asking. What I was asking was if you did not know any better--- hadn't seen this thread for example--- and the only thing you had been exposed to was undergrad rush for NPC--- is it not possible that you would think that there was nothing wrong with approaching more than one group?


I don't know the answer to that question. You might not either. (And pursuing NPHC membership on both levels is a lot more similar than NPC membership it seems.)

Ah sorry...I understand your question. I guess I see your point. Personally, I had never heard of AI until GC and I'm an alum of an NPC. I guess I just have a hard time believing that most people who have heard of AI through a channel other than GC would ever pursue more than one organization because they would likely be doing it based on ties to a specific organization.

[Scandia]

Regarding the resume:

I knew people at UF who joined a sorority because they wanted to enhance their resumes in order to be able to get into law school. Many many people did join A Phi O for selfish reasons including the resume- but I can see how this is more common and intuitive for a service fraternity. I can imagine how in some fields, membership to a social sorority/fraternity may be misinterpreted by people with misconceptions. Personally, I would not mention it- because it would fall in the same category as mentioning I belong to the Young Adult Ministry or the Anime Club. I only mention relevant professional affiliations. And nobody in my library system seems to have belonged to one for some reason.

Regarding reasons for joining:

"Pledged" did not turn me off one bit. Neither did stereotypes that other people had. Nor relatives thinking it is "buying your friends", a "rich girl's longing", or the test-stealing and hazing incidents they witnessed.

About connections:

I did not have any close friends in sororities back at UF. I had acquaintances, classmates, fraternity brothers, and the sort. But one house appealed to me very much. I tried joining it in COB, but it did not work out either (family reasons and other conflicts). When I found out about AI, this was one of the first sororities I thought of. And upon reading their website, I saw it was an excellent match for me. So I have contacted them and the process is going on. Not exactly a connection, but there were some clues.

I certainly do not plan on knocking on every door till someone answers and lets me in. I have no intentions of getting into a random house simply to wear Greek letters.

[greekalum]

What do you mean by "tried to COB"? Did they offer you a bid? Is this the only organization you are pursuing?

[Scandia]

They were doing open recruitment. I went to their house for dinner and a tour. I did not contact them again because...well, because my parents vetoed my joining a sorority for various reasons.

So no, I was not offered a bid.

It is one of my top two. The top two have philanthropies and ideals that truly are close to my heart and that appeal to me very much.

[greekalum]

Well, good luck with that.

[valkyrie]

Originally Posted by Scandia

They were doing open recruitment. I went to their house for dinner and a tour. I did not contact them again because...well, because my parents vetoed my joining a sorority for various reasons.

So no, I was not offered a bid.

Did they contact you again?

[BadSquirrelBeta]

EDITED TO ADD FROM A PREVIOUS POST: Sorority as a resume builder? You must be joking. I am loathe to put my lengthy alumnae involvement on a resume: I'm not interested in being a martyr for the "Why don't you stand up and show people your involvement?" cause. Post-college, professionals and academics view Greek life differently. The "alumnae network" is something that you seek out by making calls, emails and sending letters-- not an established party line that finds you a job with an alumna. This doesn't make me less proud of my membership-- but there is a time and a place. I wouldn't list my faith-based activities on a resume, either. Discrimination exists, and I'd rather not be passed over for a job or a program because of someone else's personal biases or in trying to make a statement for all of Greekdom.

********

OMG...the part about the resume builder, I agree completely. I will go one step further and say that we were actually told by the job fair advisor (an English professor in my case) to state "National Womens Association, Treasurer, Preparing and maintaining a budget for 65 members...", etc.

It's like the Old Saturday Night Live skit...once you are out of college, no one really cares if you are a AAA or a BBB...

[Scandia]

Nope, I did not hear from them again. But I have no idea whether they had my contact information or not.