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  #91  
Old 10-24-2010, 11:53 PM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
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^^^The funniest thing about your story is that after ONE post I thought that was as bad as it could get, yet it continued to get worse.

I'm certain this time around will go perfectly though! Congrats!
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  #92  
Old 10-24-2010, 11:59 PM
honeychile honeychile is offline
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I'm still trying to figure out who Mary and Herman were!
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  #93  
Old 05-14-2015, 11:54 PM
honeychile honeychile is offline
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wrigley and I had dinner tonight, and I mentioned the infamous "Herman and Mary". I'm bumping this as I compose "Bad Wedding Karma Deux".

At least the groom was right this time around!
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  #94  
Old 05-21-2015, 09:56 AM
OldOleMiss OldOleMiss is offline
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Oh honeychile-- I am in TEARS laughing (or is it crying) over your day...

My anniversary is in a few days and this thread got me "re-living" my day... the highlight(s) of my seemingly very smooth wedding included:

A drunk in-law who got up at our rehearsal dinner and proceeded to tell a very funny yet very touching story-- the only problem was the story was about my DH and his old college girlfriend… (can we just say awkward?)

A Groomsman knocked on my DH’s hotel door 10 mins before they needed to be at the church saying he had lost a shoe??? (HOW does one even do that?) Since my husband couldn’t “fix” this problem the guy thus came down the aisle with one “tux shoe” and one brown loafer— (WHY oh WHY wouldn’t you just wear TWO shoes that matched instead of one and one???)

I lost so much weight due to stress that my dress had been altered within an inch of its life- I then proceeded to lose more before the wedding and on the day of it didn’t fit!!!! The only solution my mother could come up with was stuffing the top with socks… thus taking me from a (somewhat hopeful A cup to something akin to Dolly Partton) - the dress fit but guest (and husband) reactions were rather priceless….

I ended up HATING my photographer and my only bridezilla moment came when I yelled at him in the church to “HURRY THE “cuss word” up or just get the “another cuss word” out”… thus appalling all involved, being yelled at by my mother like I was a 4 year old and DH and I ending up with no photos of the reception as he actually did “get the “cuss word” out…. ".

Our limo driver who was from out of town assured us he knew where the country club was … he didn’t… (he was lucky I had gotten my frustrations out on the photographer- AND that the car was stocked with champagne)

A bridesmaid who was an “I had to ask” bridesmaid- got very drunk and proceeded to tell anyone who would listen what a bitch I was because the monograms on her bridesmaid gift were in blue and I KNEW she hated the color blue and picked that color because I hated her…. (oooookay I actually did it because they matched the dresses- but I guess I did that to spite her too…)

However now ALL of these things provide wonderful laughs— but I do tell my husband “we should have eloped”….
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  #95  
Old 05-21-2015, 10:24 AM
Munchkin03 Munchkin03 is offline
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Keep these stories coming!
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  #96  
Old 05-21-2015, 11:30 AM
DreamfulSpirit DreamfulSpirit is offline
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My wedding day went pretty well overall! My 4 year anniversary is next month. We were getting married outside in mid-June at a country club. The day of the rehearsal, it is of course very hot outside! The day of, it was actually quite pleasant. Some clouds started to roll in just before the ceremony and there was a nice breeze!

They say that if it rains on your wedding day, it's supposed to be good luck. We got most of the group pics in of bridal party and family and a few of just DH and I prior to a thunderstorm rolling in. I had wanted to go out onto the golf course and take a few pics there, but the rain prevented that. However, we still got some decent photos of us on the front steps of the country club where we were covered from the rain.

The only thing that sticks out in my head about something going wrong the day of my wedding was that the 3 1/2 year old son of one of my bridesmaids (this was the friend my DH and I had met through), somehow got a hold of an epi pen and stabbed himself with it at home. They had to take him to the ER. (Most importantly) he was ok, and she was able to make it in time to get ready at the venue. Wedding went on as planned. It was more something going wrong for the bridesmaid.
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  #97  
Old 05-21-2015, 05:14 PM
JayhawkAOII JayhawkAOII is offline
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My dear husband and I had an interesting day.

My father showed up. I do not have a relationship with him. He thought he would be playing a role. Um, yeah, not so much. His very thoughtful wedding gift? A $40 "silver" tea set from Service Merchandise that was impossible to return because there was no receipt.

My sister broke up with her boyfriend the day before she flew into St. Louis for the wedding. She was a hot mess the entire weekend, and I was thanking God that I only had to deal with 1 bridesmaid.

Our florist was suffering from the effects of HIV, and passed away not long after our wedding. A week before the wedding, however, he was no where to be found and he had not contacted the caterer to get into the venue to set up a decorating time. Our caterer got us another florist for wedding flowers - I had two sets when the original florist showed up. Thank my lucky stars I have a wonderful mama who just said quietly to the second florist "let me get you my visa card and I will pay for all of this. Thank you for coming on short notice".

Our wedding cake was wrong. It had tiers. I did not want tiers. It was tasty and delicious none the less. We have a very funny picture of my husband and I getting ready to cut the cake and he finally looks at it. He's got the greatest "wtf" look on his face.

It rained. Not a gentle rain. A torential downpour. It started the afternoon of our wedding and continued raining until Wednesday of the following week. Yeah yeah good luck and all, but the pictures inside the church were very very dark with no sunlight outside.

My husband spilled red wine on my wedding dress at the reception. I have no idea to this day if it came out.

Our honeymoon, if one could call it that, was the real kicker. Remember the rain above? My husband decided we should go to Chicago for a couple of days after the wedding. It was snowing in Chicago. It was the coldest May weekend on record and I had not planned on cold weather clothing having never been to Chicago before. All I wanted was to sleep, and my husband thought we should be up at 6 every day to sightsee. It is a wonder that we stayed married after that weekend.

He did make it up to me. We took a real honeymoon in Grenada after we had been married 5 years.

20 years later, we're still going strong.
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  #98  
Old 05-22-2015, 04:26 AM
GammaGirl1908 GammaGirl1908 is offline
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Originally Posted by JayhawkAOII View Post
my husband thought we should be up at 6 every day to sightsee
...the hell? Anyone who thinks there is any possibility that I'd be up at 6 EVER is not a person I'd marry in the first place.

How did you not know about this before you hitched yourself to this ...person?... for life?

(Please note that I am posting this at ~4:30 am. I have not yet slept, and am heading to bed. I am a big-time night person. Morning people are welcome to do their thing at whatever time, and bless their happy little morning hearts, but the one who tries to force me to join them to do anything at 5:55? Will get their arm ripped off, and then I will beat them to death with it. I'm only kind of joking. Sorta.)
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  #99  
Old 05-22-2015, 01:56 PM
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My husband and I will celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary in July. I didn't sleep a wink the night before the wedding, because I was anxious about everything that could go wrong. However, it all went off without a "hitch."

The only major issue occurred right before the wedding, when we realized that my husband's ring wasn't attached to the ring bearer's pillow. I was a traditionalist, and I felt that if there is a ring bearer, he really should bear the ring. Plus, he was a bit older than is typical (8) and his flower girl sister was 6 -- they were neighbors I had babysat since birth and I was very attached to them (so it wasn't just a "courtesy pick"). It wasn't his fault...the ribbon and pin were still attached, so the adult who "attached" it must not have done a good job. Anyway, everyone was seated and we were ready to start, and unbeknownst to the guests and our parents, the wedding party was running around the rest of church trying to find the ring! The ring bearer's dad had actually pulled his own band off and we were going to use that instead, when someone found it in the parlor, where we'd taken many of the pictures. Whew! I attached the ring to the pillow myself, and away we went!

During the service, the ring bearer and flower girl kept moving closer and closer to us, so they could get a better view. My MOH sister was trying to quietly signal them them to stay in place, but it didn't work. They ended up standing right in front of us throughout most of the ceremony, and you can see the flower girl scratching her bottom during the video. We all got a laugh watching that! I actually found this to be charming...most of the time the kids are bored, but they were really into it!

It was probably a good thing they stood in front of us, because we needed them for camouflage. During the service, my husband's face was sweating PROFUSELY. We were facing each other during our vows, and I was trying to subtly back away so he wouldn't drip face sweat on my silk ballgown-style dress! Ewwww...I was shooting him dirty looks during the vows, as if he could control the sweating. We had a good laugh with the minister afterward. Seriously, though, it was gross.

We had a very nice country club reception, and there was supposed to be a shrimp sauce over the chicken, but the kitchen forgot to plate the meal with the sauce, so they brought it out in gravy boats. Nowadays, people would probably assume that was intentional, to accommodate those with food sensitivities, but I don't think we were that enlightened back then.

I had a morning wedding and afternoon reception, because I liked the British idea of wedding timing, with morning suits and the "wedding breakfast" luncheon (influenced by the televised royal weddings in the 1980s). There was another reception scheduled for the evening, and their baker delivered their cake and set it up while we still had a half hour left. It was really tacky to bring it into the ballroom while we were still there. Plus, it was ugly...white with bright blue frosting trim. It really bugged my dad, who was the country club president at the time -- he had some words with the club manager about that later.

Although that still annoys me, I have a bit more empathy now. The bottom tier of my sister's wedding cake collapsed during delivery, and her baker had to quickly go home, re-bake, and rapidly cool the replacement. The baker was really worried it wouldn't work. None of us were any the wiser, but after she told us the story afterward, I had a little more understanding of how tricky wedding cakes are and how vulnerable they are while being moved. I'm still mad that cake showed up during my reception, but I do understand why it couldn't be stored in another room and moved. Kind of.

I attended the weddings of my ring bearer and flower girl within the past couple years. My parents attended both weddings and were recognized as the "longest married couple" both times. They just celebrated their 60th anniversary in December.
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Last edited by Sciencewoman; 05-22-2015 at 02:15 PM.
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  #100  
Old 05-22-2015, 02:10 PM
flirt5721 flirt5721 is offline
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My five year anniversary is coming up. My wedding day had a few things that I was not happy about.
1) Some of my bridesmaids didn't show up to the meeting place to take the limo ride. They did show up to the church but still made me irritated.
2) The DJ showed up an hour late. He didn't even have a valid reason. Couldn't even get a refund. He closed down a few months later. He was highly recommend.
3) My cake....my sister had her friend make it. I was so disappointed. The price I paid was not worth it. It was small. The only good thing about it was the flavor.
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  #101  
Old 05-23-2015, 10:34 AM
33girl 33girl is offline
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Some crazy heifer named Amal knocked me down, stole my dress and went to the wedding in my place. So annoying.
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  #102  
Old 05-24-2015, 09:23 AM
AOIIalum AOIIalum is offline
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Some crazy heifer named Amal knocked me down, stole my dress and went to the wedding in my place. So annoying.
Well played. Very well played!
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  #103  
Old 05-25-2015, 04:08 PM
BraveMaroon BraveMaroon is offline
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Just got back from a big, fun outdoor wedding for one of my cousins where one of the cousins from the Scandinavian side of the family sang a song his family had written for the occasion. He was probably a little buzzed and he messed up, and said, "Aw, F***!" into the microphone, to the horror of the bride and some of her father's very prim relatives.

The bride said, "Don't use that word! " he asked which word and somebody explained. He said, "I said that? Shit!"

He finished up the song and the bride looked PISSED. Those of us with a sense of humor thought it was one of the highlights.
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Last edited by BraveMaroon; 05-25-2015 at 04:09 PM. Reason: clarity
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  #104  
Old 05-25-2015, 08:05 PM
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^^^ Hahaha...you just know that's what everyone is going to remember.

My husband's cousin had his own father serve as best man. You would think that he could be counted on to give a tactful, respectable toast, free from anything cringe worthy. You would be wrong in thinking this was a safe choice. He thought he was being funny, but it's really not appropriate to mention that you're not sure your son is ready to get married, given the fact that he "still leaves skid marks in his underwear."

That's what I remember from that wedding.
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Last edited by Sciencewoman; 05-25-2015 at 08:07 PM.
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  #105  
Old 05-25-2015, 11:04 PM
BraveMaroon BraveMaroon is offline
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My own wedding was pretty smooth. One of my parents' neighbors fell into the band. He'd been drinking, was dancing, and went into the band. They kept playing, he popped right back up, and kept dancing and everyone cheered. People still remember that, and since no one was hurt, it's all good.

We got married in August and had intended to get married at 7:30 PM outside (in Atlanta), but the night before, decided it was just too hot, and moved the ceremony inside - we had the whole facility rented, and there was a room ready and waiting, so we pulled the trigger at the rehearsal.

My sister... when she got married, the florist was putting the moves on the photographer - full court press before the ceremony. The pictures were so bad, that he dropped off the album at my parents' front door while they were out.

Thankfully, we had tons of friends and family who had taken tons of pictures, so...
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