D&R Random

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by StealthMode

Dodger is the Artist-Formerly-Known-as-Geekboy.

I've been watching Days of Our Lives since I was 10. I can keep just about any storyline straight, complete with identity switches and people who come back from the dead.

That's right. I've been thinking of him as Dodger longer...lol. I forgot the original Geekboy designation.

[Mizeree I2K]

I'm trippin off of these premarital questions. Me and Brandi have been seeing her pastor for these premarital sessions. Dude gave us these packets to read, and we have to answer the questions without showing each other our answers. It's kind of fun in a sense, because I wouldn't have given any thought to some of these questions. He said he wasn't happy at the fact that I've been hittin it before marriage. We both just nodded and told him we knew better. He told us to try to wait until May. As soon as we got home though, we were back to fuckn like rabbits LOL! One thing he did say though, was that he noticed that through all of his questions and advice, we always said "we" or "us". He said those words are the first step to a healthy marriage.

[XAntoftheSkyX]

Originally Posted by TonyB06

I know. AGDee's personal life is like a television series, with all the nicknames and backstories. If you haven't tuned in from the beginning, you might as well wait for the summer.... reruns?

[Psi U MC Vito]

Originally Posted by StealthMode

Dodger is the Artist-Formerly-Known-as-Geekboy.

I've been watching Days of Our Lives since I was 10. I can keep just about any storyline straight, complete with identity switches and people who come back from the dead.

So Dee, how do you feel having your life compared to a soap opera *ducks and hides from HG*?

[StealthMode]

Originally Posted by Psi U MC Vito

So Dee, how do you feel having your life compared to a soap opera *ducks and hides from HG*?

I've been playing softball since I was 9. My aim is exceptional. *throws softball and hits Vito in his hiding place*

Wow. I just got a message from an old friend whose wedding I couldn't attend but I got the feeling it never happened (no FB pictures, congrats, etc). I asked what happened and she said "I'd love to know that, too. I have no clue." Apparently, they had been arguing for a couple months over his job (he complained about his job but wasn't following through on job searches for a new one). They had agreed not to get married until he switched jobs but whenever she brought it up, he got really mean and nasty with her. They continued with the wedding plans anyway. Then, about 8 weeks prior to the wedding, he called her at 5am and said he was calling off the wedding but was going to work and couldn't talk about it. He wouldn't answer her calls all day then finally told her all his work problems were her fault and he didn't want to marry her. They haven't spoken since.

That is SO crazy. I felt badly for her but...well, I don't see why she was still going to marry him. I mean, I'm sure it took both of them to get their relationship to that point and there are probably things she's not telling me. But I told her even though I'm happy she dodged that bullet, I wonder why she was willing to accept a future husband who didn't follow through on his word and was treating her in a way she didn't like. It makes me worried for the type of relationship/marriage she'll have in the future. She's such an awesome woman--it'd have been so sad if she'd gone through with the wedding knowing she was unhappy.

[Mizeree I2K]

Originally Posted by XAntoftheSkyX

CTFU!

Curious dude. You met any new females since ol girl bounced?

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by Psi U MC Vito

So Dee, how do you feel having your life compared to a soap opera *ducks and hides from HG*?

I think it's actually more like a sit com most days I <3 my life.

[PrettyBoy]

Meant to post this when we had that snow last week:

The front desk lady at work came to work with a snow covered car as she always does when it snows. According to her, she's good with just cleaning off the front windshield.

Me: Your husband can't clean that snow off the car for you?

Her: He works midnights, and gets home an hour before I leave in the mornings, so he goes right to bed.

Me:

They also just bought a new 2012 car that apparently he drives, seeing that she drives an old car.

Folks can roll how they choose to, but my thoughts on that:

1. She should be driving the new car, and he the old.

2. If he gets home from work an hour before she leaves for work, if that was me, that car would be warmed up and cleaned off for her every morning before she heads off to work.

How a man is cool with his wife/woman getting into a cold, snow-covered, old car while he drives the new one makes ZERO sense to me.....

I. JUST. DON'T. GET. IT.








Just sayin.....

[WCsweet<3]

Originally Posted by PrettyBoy

Meant to post this when we had that snow last week:

The front desk lady at work came to work with a snow covered car as she always does when it snows. According to her, she's good with just cleaning off the front windshield.

Me: Your husband can't clean that snow off the car for you?

Her: He works midnights, and gets home an hour before I leave in the mornings, so he goes right to bed.

Me:

They also just bought a new 2012 car that apparently he drives, seeing that she drives an old car.

Folks can roll how they choose to, but my thoughts on that:

1. She should be driving the new car, and he the old.

2. If he gets home from work an hour before she leaves for work, if that was me, that car would be warmed up and cleaned off for her every morning before she heads off to work.

How a man is cool with his wife/woman getting into a cold, snow-covered, old car while he drives the new one makes ZERO sense to me.....

I. JUST. DON'T. GET. IT.








Just sayin.....

The other stuff... meh, whatever works for them. The fact that he gets home an hour before she leaves and doesn't, at least occasionally, clear off the car is odd. I wouldn't expect it every time, but at least sometimes. Actually, most men I know would do it every time, but whatever.

[Mizeree I2K]

Originally Posted by PrettyBoy

Meant to post this when we had that snow last week:

The front desk lady at work came to work with a snow covered car as she always does when it snows. According to her, she's good with just cleaning off the front windshield.

Me: Your husband can't clean that snow off the car for you?

Her: He works midnights, and gets home an hour before I leave in the mornings, so he goes right to bed.

Me:

They also just bought a new 2012 car that apparently he drives, seeing that she drives an old car.

Folks can roll how they choose to, but my thoughts on that:

1. She should be driving the new car, and he the old.

2. If he gets home from work an hour before she leaves for work, if that was me, that car would be warmed up and cleaned off for her every morning before she heads off to work.

How a man is cool with his wife/woman getting into a cold, snow-covered, old car while he drives the new one makes ZERO sense to me.....

I. JUST. DON'T. GET. IT.








Just sayin.....

Dude puts the "P" on a pedestal LOL. I feel you, though.

[PrettyBoy]

Originally Posted by WCsweet<3

The fact that he gets home an hour before she leaves and doesn't, at least occasionally, clear off the car is odd. .

I agree, but I think he should do it consistently, by making it a habit. I actually started to add since he has an hour to kill before she leaves, and he goes to sleep, pack her a lunch, too. I have to roll with what it says in Proverbs 31:10. "Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies." If a man is treating his woman less than that (consistently), to me, that strikes me as "odd". But like you said, it just comes down to what's acceptable to her/him. But for me, no woman of mine (if I can help it) is going to drive off in a cold, snow covered car. That's unacceptable, to me.

But, whatever floats their boat.

[XAntoftheSkyX]

Originally Posted by Mizeree I2K

CTFU!

Curious dude. You met any new females since ol girl bounced?

Not really. Exchanged a few emails, but nothing has come to fruition.

[cheerfulgreek]

I just want to "piggy back" and comment about the guy not clearing off the snow or warming up the car for his wife. I'm not going to place all of the blame on him by calling him "odd" --shame on you, PB. This actually isn't an "odd" thing at all. In fact, it's a very common problem with many men. For all we know, she might be so self-sufficient, that he doesn't feel the need to clear off the car, or warm it up for her. If she isn't that way, then shame on him.

Honestly, I think that each of us must find our own individual way. For those of us who have a man we are romantically involved with, when we are out with him, some of us will pump gas in the car, or whatever, and some of us will not, expecting him to do it for us, etc. I can't speak for those couples, but as for me personally, I want my coat held, my chair pulled out, doors opened, snow cleared off, car warmed up, etc. --grade-A precious vessel treatment all the way. I'm not ruining my manicure unnecessarily…why should I if I don't have to?

To switch that around, not only do I think a man should be a perfect gentleman, but a woman should also be able to please him when it comes to his needs as well. I brought being too self-sufficient up, only to point out that many men feel they have nothing to offer most women, because we have gotten it all for ourselves. And many of us confirm this by wearing a self-sufficient attitude, leaving no room for the man to feel as if he can add anything else to our lives. I think it is important to be careful of this, because men were created to give.

Bottom line, nothing affects a man as deeply as an encounter with a woman who has womanly qualities. Most of the time we as women give when we should not, enabling men to be wimps or we withhold when we should give, crippling the man from rising up and taking his place in the relationship -- and this is part of the reason (in many relationships) why a lot of passive men or men who have become passive won't step up to the plate and be men.

[Mizeree I2K]

Originally Posted by XAntoftheSkyX

Not really. Exchanged a few emails, but nothing has come to fruition.

Cool. That's a start.

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

I just want to "piggy back" and comment about the guy not clearing off the snow or warming up the car for his wife. I'm not going to place all of the blame on him by calling him "odd" --shame on you, PB. This actually isn't an "odd" thing at all. In fact, it's a very common problem with many men. For all we know, she might be so self-sufficient, that he doesn't feel the need to clear off the car, or warm it up for her. If she isn't that way, then shame on him.

Honestly, I think that each of us must find our own individual way. For those of us who have a man we are romantically involved with, when we are out with him, some of us will pump gas in the car, or whatever, and some of us will not, expecting him to do it for us, etc. I can't speak for those couples, but as for me personally, I want my coat held, my chair pulled out, doors opened, snow cleared off, car warmed up, etc. --grade-A precious vessel treatment all the way. I'm not ruining my manicure unnecessarily…why should I if I don't have to?

To switch that around, not only do I think a man should be a perfect gentleman, but a woman should also be able to please him when it comes to his needs as well. I brought being too self-sufficient up, only to point out that many men feel they have nothing to offer most women, because we have gotten it all for ourselves. And many of us confirm this by wearing a self-sufficient attitude, leaving no room for the man to feel as if he can add anything else to our lives. I think it is important to be careful of this, because men were created to give.

Bottom line, nothing affects a man as deeply as an encounter with a woman who has womanly qualities. Most of the time we as women give when we should not, enabling men to be wimps or we withhold when we should give, crippling the man from rising up and taking his place in the relationship -- and this is part of the reason (in many relationships) why a lot of passive men or men who have become passive won't step up to the plate and be men.

All of this is deep as hell, and I wouldn't have never seen it from this point of view. If I didn't know better, I would think you were Brandi's pastor on GC LOL. So far, just about everything dude has mentioned to us made me think of some of the things I've read from you over here. When you said dudes become passive, what would you say the other part of the reason is? For real question. I'm just asking because I hear a lot of females talking about how they don't like indecisive dudes.

Most of this is on point........

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

I can't speak for those couples, but as for me personally, I want my coat held, my chair pulled out, doors opened, snow cleared off, car warmed up, etc. --grade-A precious vessel treatment all the way. I'm not ruining my manicure unnecessarily…why should I if I don't have to?

........but goddamn! LOL!

[WCsweet<3]

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

I just want to "piggy back" and comment about the guy not clearing off the snow or warming up the car for his wife. I'm not going to place all of the blame on him by calling him "odd" --shame on you, PB. This actually isn't an "odd" thing at all. In fact, it's a very common problem with many men. For all we know, she might be so self-sufficient, that he doesn't feel the need to clear off the car, or warm it up for her. If she isn't that way, then shame on him.

Honestly, I think that each of us must find our own individual way. For those of us who have a man we are romantically involved with, when we are out with him, some of us will pump gas in the car, or whatever, and some of us will not, expecting him to do it for us, etc. I can't speak for those couples, but as for me personally, I want my coat held, my chair pulled out, doors opened, snow cleared off, car warmed up, etc. --grade-A precious vessel treatment all the way. I'm not ruining my manicure unnecessarily…why should I if I don't have to?

To switch that around, not only do I think a man should be a perfect gentleman, but a woman should also be able to please him when it comes to his needs as well. I brought being too self-sufficient up, only to point out that many men feel they have nothing to offer most women, because we have gotten it all for ourselves. And many of us confirm this by wearing a self-sufficient attitude, leaving no room for the man to feel as if he can add anything else to our lives. I think it is important to be careful of this, because men were created to give.

Bottom line, nothing affects a man as deeply as an encounter with a woman who has womanly qualities. Most of the time we as women give when we should not, enabling men to be wimps or we withhold when we should give, crippling the man from rising up and taking his place in the relationship -- and this is part of the reason (in many relationships) why a lot of passive men or men who have become passive won't step up to the plate and be men.

I had kind of assumed the wife was complaining about it and that was how PB knew the situation, like that the husband wasn't clearing the car. I think what I find most interesting is that the husband goes to bed right away. I mean it's only an hour. Why not stay up and help the wife/chat with her. I often wake up with Boyfriend when he gets up and although he is getting ready we can check in a little bit and see what is going on with the other person. I understand that he may be exhausted, but it's only an hour. He must be a deep sleeper if he can sleep through his partner getting ready.

I like your distinction between being self sufficient and being too self sufficient. I think it goes both way, for men and women. Many need to feel that they contribute in their partner's life. Not all, but many.