advice

[greeksister]

deleted

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by greeksister

I am really wanting to reconnect with my sorority through an alumnae chapter. However, I am having some serious self doubting & worry.

When I joined my house, I felt like I was at home. I got along with most everyone, except my "twin" - I think she was jealous that our big had taken on another little, but it never really came up. The older memebers were very nice to me & I loved it. I was involved, etc.

I did end up having my initiation delayed, because a girl who desperately wanted in our house (& happened to be friends with my twin) picked a fight with me at a party one night & tried to fight me. I did not give in to her and was broguht before standards. I was initiated the next semester.

After that there were no problems. I was our house manager for 2 years, got good grades, went to socials & was very active. My last year went through a very difficult time (depression). I had to uphold rules & standards and had little support. Alot of girls turned on me and I kept in touch with no one after I graduated - I was so upset at what my "sisters" were doing to me & how they treated me. I loved my house, but my last year was so tough.

I had twin lil's one initiated & never really connected with the chapter, the other I was friends with and I'm not quite sure what happened, she abruptly stopped talking to me & I graduated that spring. I recently saw her on FB & found out she was adopted by another girl in our house.

I still love my sorority & am wanting to reconnect through an alumnae chapter (not necessarily girls with my chapter, but other members), however, I found out that the person who is the head of it is one of those who treated me horribly. I even emailed her earlier this year to be invited to an anniversary reunion and she didn't even email me back. I am partially hoping that after a decade it will be "water under the bridge" but the other part of me says it won't be any different.

I have to say I am so nervous about rejection or old things coming up.

Any thoughts?

Do you want to be involved or not?

That's really all there is to it.

Just go to the alumnae chapter meeting and see how it goes.

Remember, this woman is not the only person in the chapter. There may be plenty of other women that you'll get along just fine with.

I wouldn't let this one person get in the way of you pursuing alumna involvement with your sorority.

[greeksister]

KSU -- Thanks for the advice - I DO want to be involved, just nervous about it.

[33girl]

If you haven't already, try reconnecting with your chapter sisters on Facebook first. Even if you did have a bad last year or so, most people will be OK with being your FB friend.

Your attempt to join an alum chapter without doing that might be interpreted as your thinking that you're "above" your collegiate chapter and want to disassociate yourself from them. Note, I do not think this AT ALL, but I'm just putting your situation in the context of my own chapter, thinking of girls who were in similar situations and the thoughts of other members. And yeah, that would have been the exact reaction.

I hope this makes sense - if you want to PM me feel free.