First year rushers - Page 4

KSUViolet06 · #46 09-13-2004, 11:26 AM

I'm about halfway through recruitment @ my school. This was my FIRST formal recruitment EVER too. I have a couple tips myself:

*Pee before you show up. You don't want to be doing the "potty dance" while you're talking.

*At the end of each round, WRITE DOWN the PNM's names, descriptions of clothing, something you talked about, ANYTHING that will help you remember them later.

* Be prepared for ANYTHING. Things happen. You may end up having to rush 2 girls at the LAST second before the girls come in, so LISTEN and be prepared.

* I suggest taking a mint before every round, esp. after lunch.

*If you're having a hard time talking to a girl, use the ROOM. Take her to a table or something and let her look at stuff.

*SMILE! Even if it's last round, you're tired, you had a difficult girl last round, you're starving, and your feet hurt. ESPECIALLY day one. They don't know what happened last round. This is their FIRST time seeing you so you need to act like it.

BellaBerlee · #47 08-02-2005, 10:20 AM

*bump*

can we bump this for any more advice on first year rushers in the 2005 year? Can we hear from the 2004 first year rushers? What was the hardest/easiest parts?

I know that recruitment and spirit week is coming up in the next week/ two weeks, and I'm excitedly nervous! There's so much that could happen, but I think overall it's going to be an amazing time.

thanks for all the previous advice, do we have any more that would help myself and others out this year?

adpiucf · #48 08-02-2005, 10:53 AM

1) Spirit Week is about working hard and having fun! If you find yourself without something to do, go and ask the Recruitment VP or Chairman what you can help her with. It will be appreciated!
2) Spirit Week is a great week to bond with your entire sorority. Take time to get to know women you may not have spent a lot of time with in the past. You’d be surprised at the lasting friendships and bonds that develop from Spirit Week.
3) EAT! Keep a stash of snacks (but be prepared to share). Sometimes you’re not allowed to leave during Spirit Week hours—and those are some long hours! Even if dinner is provided, food sometimes runs out. So eat!
4) Remember SILENCE—it’s ok to spend time with your BF at the ABC Fraternity House, but remember that PNM’s will be hanging out there, too. You can be friendly and polite to them, but don’t talk about sorority stuff. I know that is really hard to do, so you might be best off just being friendly, polite and then going off with your boyfriend away from the house to get away from even the possibility that someone could think you were dirty rushing!
5) Wear LETTERS on and around campus in the week before recruitment and look your personal best! Also be on your best behavior—you are a public relations ambassador for your sorority 365 days a year – your words and actions can negatively influence a PNM or group of PNM’s about you, your sorority and the Greek System.
6) Practice conversation! Mock “rush” other sisters, and even practice shaking hands.
7) It’s ok to be nervous meeting PNM’s. They’re nervous, too! Just think—I’m making a new friend today. See what you have in common—the same as you might do if you went out with a big group of people and found yourself standing around with someone new.
8) Ask open-ended questions that can’t be answered with “yes” or “no.”
9) Don’t ask questions that make them think they’re being tested for a right or wrong answer. They could cut you because it will freak them out, when really, you’re trying to be creative. This isn’t the time to be creative. This is the time to get to know a girl who might fit into your chapter. Find out what she has to contribute, if you get along well, and sell her on your chapter.
10) SELL her on your chapter. Know your chapter’s history, sorority values, your programs, some of the upcoming events, etc.
11) Know your sisters. If Samantha PNM hails from Smalltown USA, and that is a unique place because 99% of the rest of campus comes from Big City USA, and you know that Sister Aimee hails from Smalltown USA, you can connect them and possibly earn some props with that PNM because she feels more at ease knowing she not the only Smalltown girl on campus. (Similarly, if the PNM is in a non-traditional major and there’s a girl at your chapter in that major, too, you have a similar effect.)
12) It’s ok to drift away from talking about your community service plans for the year and have a 20 minute conversation about “The OC!”
13) Listen to what the PNM is saying and react to her accordingly.
14) ****This isn’t intended as a flame-comment.**** You’re going to meet some weirdos. That’s ok. There will be other PNM’s who will meet you and think you’re a weirdo, too. And there will be the occasional PNM who acts like she’s too cool for school or your sorority. And there will also be the triple legacy who is either a dud, overly intimidating because she’s your chapter’s IT GIRL this recruitment, psycho for your sorority or completely turned off by you.
15) Not every PNM you rush will become your sister. That’s ok! It’s your job to help them feel at home in your chapter and to leave your house with the impression, “(YOUR NAME) was awesome! I really like her and would love to be her friend!” regardless of whether she’s your Recruitment Crush or someone you can’t wait to escort to the door.
16) Show how proud you are of your sorority and impress in a short time what a big part of your life it is. If asked, “Was XYZ your first choice when you went through recruitment?” YES, and I can’t imagine being a member of any other sorority. (Some may disagree that this is dishonest if, in fact, XYZ was your second choice… but honestly, this is a question a PNM will ask because she may be leaning toward your chapter AND you. If she learns you were wishy-washy when you preffed, she may decide well… if it was sloppy seconds for you, why should she want to make it her #1?) It’s about SELLING her on your sorority.
17) Have fun! Just be yourself and represent your letters well! You want to make friends, educate PNM’s about your sorority and have a great time with your sisters!

KSUViolet06 · #49 08-02-2005, 10:59 AM

*I know you probably won't take this advice but, DON'T BE NERVOUS. These girls WANT to be where you are- in a chapter.

*Try not to stress yourself over things like QUOTA, RETURN RATES, RELEASE FIGURES. Those are for your VP Recruitment and advisory team to stress over. If you're all in a tizzy over numbers, the stress will show itself during the parties to the PNM's.

*USE your chapter's recruitment prep time
(Spirit/Work/Perfection/Refinement Week) to ABSORB all the RECRUITMENT INFO you can! Ask for clarification on rules and things if you don't understand them. This is time your chapter has set aside for YOU to learn about recruitment, so pay attention.

*KNOW YOUR INFO- philanthropy, career network programs, foundation, EVERYTHING. Have it down cold, so if a PNM asks what "The XYZ foundation supports" you don't have to say "umm" or stand there looking blankly because you don't know.

*Ask OPEN ENDED QUESTIONS. NOTHING you ask should be a "yes" or "no" question, or you'll end up with alot of awkward silence.

*DO NOT SWEAR. EVER. Seems like a no-brainer, but another chapter had NO problem swearing while talking to PNM's. That's rude. If you're a habitual swearer, start NOW with learning not to.

*When you are finished talking to a PNM, DO NOT JUST WALK OFF WHEN A NEW SISTER COMES TO TALK TO HER! Be sure to say something like : "It was nice meeting you, this is my sister Patty. Patty, this is Suzy (PNM). We were just talking about ...." Make a proper, polite exit.

*There will be the girls who for whatever reason, JUST DON'T LIKE YOUR CHAPTER, and you won't be able to make them say 2 words to you during a party. Don't take it personally. Everyone is looking for something different in a sorority.

*EAT. Even if you aren't a breakfast person. Eat before the day starts. You'll be glad you did.

*Before and during the recruitment period, KNOW THAT THE PNM's ARE WATCHING YOU. Be mindful of this in your personal appearance, words, and actions.

*KNOW YOUR SISTERS. One of your sisters could be from the same hometown as the PNM you're talking to. If you are familiar with your sisters, you'll know that and say "Oh you're from Cleveland? My sister Patty is from there too! You 2 should meet".

*When you have a break during the day with your sisters, LAUGH! Make silly faces, dance around, recall a funny thing from a mixer, ANYTHING to get everyone relaxed.

*If you go to a school like mine where you have parties on 2 weekends with a week in the middle, or if you have actual parties during the weeek, DO NOT FORGET YOUR SCHOOL WORK. It's pretty easy to when you've been working hard ALL weekend and don't feel like homework on a Sunday night, but don't forget about school.

LionTamer · #50 08-02-2005, 12:03 PM

If you feel yourself getting punchy or pissy, take a break - go into the kitchen, don't inflict yourself on some poor PNM.

I was exhausted at the end of our last pref party, and one of the PNMs was holding a flower from one of the "top" sororities, where a big percent of our rush crushes ended up every year (back when you were allowed to send PNMs home with little tokens). She said "This is going to be so hard, I don't know where to go". She was poised and polished, and a perfect fit for the sorority whose flower she had, where we were more of a relaxed, "fun" sorority.

That was my breaking point. I looked at her and said, in what I thought was a sarcastic tone, "Oh, you know exactly where you want to go. Don't overthink it, just go with the gut," and I passed her on to someone else and stomped off to the kitchen so I wouldn't snap at some other poor PNM.

Next night at bid night she hugged me, saying "Thank you so much! When you said to go with my gut, it made the choice so easy, because I did know going into your party that ASA was exactly where I wanted to go, and I was overthinking it!"

Okay, so that one ended up alright, but that was one in a hundred - trust me - time out in the kitchen is a better then being snippy and sarcastic!

twhrider13 · #51 08-02-2005, 02:42 PM

This is going to sound silly, but I'm going to say it anyway, because it's saved my butt a time or two. If a PNM says something rude to you, or asks you a question that makes you go brain-dead, pretend like you didn't hear her! Don't not acknowledge that she's said anything; just say, "I'm sorry, what did you say? All the noise in here makes it really hard to hear sometimes." *Big smile*

If the PNM realizes that what she's said was stupid, she may think twice about repeating herself, thereby saving you from having to reply. Or, if she does repeat herself, it gives you a good 10 or 15 seconds from the time she first said it to the time she finishes saying it again to come up with a good answer!

I had this happen to me last year. My chapter had several pictures of previous bid days hanging near our sisterhood table--professional pictures with captions on them describing exactly what they were ("2003 New Members, All Sororities," "2003 Delta Zeta New Members," etc.), not just random snapshots. I was showing this table to an unenthuiastic PNM when she asked me, "Why do y'all have four of the same pictures up back there?" in a rather nasty voice. My first thought was to say something like, "Well, if you could read, you'd know they weren't the same pictures, stupid." I didn't, however, and I replied, "I'm sorry, I couldn't understand you. It's a bit noisy in here," with a big smile. She repeated her question in an even more obnoxious voice, because, apparently, she now thought that I was not only stupid but deaf. In the amount of time it took for her to ask me the question twice, I managed to formulate a polite reply, explaining that some of the pictures were of all the 2003 PNMs who completed recruitment and some were of the 2003 Delta Zeta new members, and whatever else the pictures were. I guess she thought I made her look dumb or something (she really didn't need any help), because she replied, "Yeah, well, you have lipstick on your teeth!" (I didn't.) I passed her off to the next sister as quickly as possible!

ETA: That girl was cut by all five chapters the next day, so I can only assume she was probably just as rude to them as she was to me.

adpiucf · #52 08-02-2005, 03:25 PM

Agreed! During recruitment, our chapter house turns into a loud and crowded mob! One incident I recall -- I remember leading one of the PNM's through the house and as I passed through a narrow hall, I sorta tripped over myself to allow someone else to pass by.

"Whoa! Walk much?!" The PNM asked.

I was pretty offended at first, but I just ignored it over the loudness and as I got to talking to her, I realized she was just really funny with a great sense of humor. I saw her at prefs, again on Bid Day and she turned out to be a beautiful, fun and very active addition to the chapter!

KSUViolet06 · #53 08-06-2005, 02:02 PM

*If a PNM is openly rude to you, please handle it with tact. Do a smile and nod, change the subject, whatever you need to do to keep from doing something crazy like curse, yell, or scream. Deal with it the best you can, then handle it accordingly later on.

BellaBerlee · #54 08-06-2005, 02:13 PM

See, I dont think I would curse, scream yell... but more so I would probably cry-- haha. Just because someone didnt like me or bc their attitude towards me ... haha

Its okay, I just have to remember not everyone is going to love me!

KSUViolet06 · #55 08-06-2005, 02:52 PM

*You are NOT GOING TO LOVE EVERY PNM. As a matter of fact, there will be some that you will not be ABLE TO STAND. But just deal with it the best way you can.

*Remember NPC RULES. I can't stress this enough. You NEVER want to be the reason your chapter gets an infraction.

*If there's a girl you LOVE, please CONTAIN your enthusiasm. DO NOT SHRIEK, "OMG ASHLEY!!!!" across the room when you see her back again for 3rd party. You don't want to SCARE her.

*THIS IS NOT A COMPETITION. I don't care what anyone says, but it's not. It's about getting the best women for your chapter. This is not about slandering, spying on, sabotaging, lying about, ANY OTHER CHAPTER. Some chapters approach recruitment like a WAR on other sororities. Seriously, everyone just focus on helpng your chapter do their personal best. If you see another chapter committing a violation, do report it, but don't turn recruitment into "war of the sororities".

KSUViolet06 · #56 08-07-2005, 10:12 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by lilsunshine214

*If a friend of yours goes through recruitment, don't dote over them. At the same time, ignoring that friend completely may make them feel unwanted and insecure.

*Rushers, if you do happen to have a friend going through, be sure you explain the SILENCE/CONTACT RULES to her if she doesn't already know. That way she won't be freaked out or upset when you change the subject when she starts talking about rush. And make sure she understands that you two can't be hanging out at each other's homes, etc during rush, so she's not offended when you decline her offer to go study together or something like that.

*On the topic of friends again: Make sure they know that being your friend (or anyone elses) DOES NOT GUARANTEE THEM A BID from your chapter (or any other). Do not in any way imply this at all (i.e. "OMG you're a shoe-in for my chapter!" or "They love you because I do."). We ALL know how some comments can be misinterpreted.

*Might sound like common sense, but DO NOT PRESSURE FRIENDS TO JOIN YOUR CHAPTER. Let them know that this is about personal choices and that they don't have to join your chapter and that you would understand if they did not. In some situations, the pressure for a good friend of an XYZ can be akin to that of a legacy. She might feel like you wouldn't be friends anymore if you didn't end up sisters. Reassure her that this is not true.

**Man I am FULL of tips lately**

aephi alum · #57 08-07-2005, 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by lilsunshine214
*If a friend of yours goes through recruitment, don't dote over them. At the same time, ignoring that friend completely may make them feel unwanted and insecure.

Very true. You do want to be sure to talk to your friend at least once during the first couple of rounds, and you will probably want to pref her if she comes back for pref - but she needs to meet other sisters besides you, and you need to meet other PNMs besides her.

ADPi Conniebama · #58 08-07-2005, 02:36 PM

Out of the 3 or 4 years that I did recruitment I never had anyone be "completely rude" to me, but I have had girls that didn't/wouldn't speak.

DON'T take silence as rudeness. MOST of the time it is just them being nervous and if you have the talent to bring them out of their shell then great, if not, just keep telling them about your sorority (sisterhood, friendship, fun, etc) and pause for questions or whatever and of course, if you know of another sister that may have more in common with them the introductions are necessary.

DON'T loose controll of the conversation. You are the sister they are the recruit. You have something they may want. ENJOY THE SELL.

KSUViolet06 · #59 08-07-2005, 06:11 PM

*DON'T WHINE. Rush is demanding. You'll have MANY late nights, difficult decisions, disagreements, and tough situations. But your ENTIRE chapter doesn't need to hear non-stop COMPLAINING. We all have that ONE sister who will do NOTHING but WHINE from setup to clean up. The one who pouts and says, "I want to go home/out/to my boyfriend's" all day long. Don't let that be you.

*START EARLY getting your OUTFITS together! I'd say have ALL your outfits together by at least a month before you get your outfits checked by your recruitment chairs.

*BE ON TIME! If you have class or something equally important, be sure the appropriate chapter officers know beforehand.

*This may be a no-brainer, but BE POLITE and RESPECTFUL to your alumnae. They volunteer their time to help, and ARE YOUR SISTERS as much as the actives are! Do not roll your eyes at them or ignore them.

*KNOW HOW TO ANSWER: "Why did you choose XYZ?" Really sit and think about WHY you chose your chapter and how to describe those qualities to a PNM.

whittleschmeg · #60 08-08-2005, 03:12 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Glitter650
I'm going to have to fall back on the old cliche "keep an open mind" we tell it all the time to PNMs.. but I think sisters need to hear it too.
don't make any snap judgments... even if on first impression there is a girl that you think is "IF-y" at first keep talking and getting to know her, you can find sisters in women who at the beginning of the week you weren't too impressed with !!
Also I think we should all try to remember that we have to share about ourselves as well... I mean this may seem obvious but what I meanis sometimes we get wrapped up in finding out about the PNM and letting them know aobut the chapter as a whole ... that we don't let them know about US individually as much as we should, you know what WE like to do with our spare time...do we have any pets at home... whatever... just make sure they get a sense of YOU and don't just see you as a "sister of XYZ"

Good looking out glitter a good rusher should leave the potentially new member feeling as though they could be friends with that one sister that let "them in". In the end they associate XYZ with that sister and know they can be her friend.

Always try to be real, tell the truth but if you have too just don't tell the whole truth...A story about when you rushed is a good way to make them feel calm
IE: I never thought I would be in a soroity either I went through rush with a friend to help her and look at me now, I didn't realize it would be like this it really is alot of fun and something that can never quite be explained.

Rush is sooooo much fun its what you make of it. If you have questions about the girls ask before you vote....also take time away from sisters during the day eat lunch with a GDI friend of yours it will help you to clear your head....and also watch the girls through out the week to see how they act away from all the fast paced scheduled recruitment activities

Goodluck to everyone and keep us all posted