Snow White’s Totally Fake Retro Rush

[CharlieDean]

Snow White was a shy girl in high school and had never really thought much about joining a sorority in college. Locker talk at high school was that sororities were like drill teams, except for the dancing. Snow White didn’t really know what that meant, so she was afraid she would have to wear fringed costumes and white boots if she pledged. Snow White was very fair skinned, and knew that she could never pull off white boots without some degree of laughter from the male population.

It wasn’t until she met the girl across the hall from her, Anna, that she decided to go through rush. She and Anna went to a small school that had a lot of foreign exchange students, and that usually meant that their roommates did not speak much English. Snow White's own roommate had just stared at her in silence when asked where she was at with English. Snow White was okay with that, because she had met a few the fabulously trendy cartoon squirrels that lived in the woods behind the Cafeteria, and was content to sit with them while listening to music. She wondered why they had never hit on her, as they seemed to prefer the romantic company of each other instead of her. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. But after she met Anna, she knew that she would be much happier if she communicated with other cartoon humans instead. Besides, she was starting to get strange looks from the Ken Dolls in the fraternity house nearby. They were cute guys, but seemed to be a bit plastic, and Snow White wondered if they really had anything going downstairs, if you know what I mean.

Snow White was a little nervous about rush, because she had not prepared for it at all. She noticed a few of the other girls in her dorm, Ariel and Belle, came with glossy headshots and loads of typed recommendations. Other girls, such as Cinderella and Rapunzel, were too gorgeous to even walk among mere mortals. Cinderella was so well dressed and beautiful that Snow White wondered if she had her own ambiguously fabulous cartoon animals that had personally dressed her that morning.

At Snow White’s school, there were seven sororities:

Bashful
Grumpy
Sleepy
Sneezy
Doc
Happy
Dopey

Castle talk was that Cinderella was a legacy, and would have no problems getting into a top-tier sorority, Sleepy. Anna was also a legacy; as her sister, Elsa, was an alumna at another top sorority, Sneezy. Anna was nervous, because she did not feel that she could compete with the beauties that were Sneezy sisters. Snow White was confident that she would be happy with whatever the outcome was. She knew that she would meet some great girls in the meantime, and have fun no matter what. But, there was something on her mind….that thing.