GreekChat.com Forums  

Go Back   GreekChat.com Forums > Recruitment > Sorority Recruitment

Sorority Recruitment Recruitment event and bid day ideas, membership retention, publicity, recruitment policies, etc.


Register Now for FREE!
Join GreekChat.com, The Fraternity & Sorority Greek Chat Network. To sign up for your FREE account INSTANTLY fill out the form below!

Username: Password: Confirm Password: E-Mail: Confirm E-Mail:
 
Image Verification
Please enter the six letters or digits that appear in the image opposite.

  I agree to forum rules 

» GC Stats
Members: 307,514
Threads: 114,736
Posts: 2,158,416
Welcome to our newest member, Dezzywilliams
» Online Users: 273
2 members and 271 guests
lycruelmelod, yrneydann
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 06-15-2018, 04:56 PM
EliBean EliBean is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 18
Too Many Recs?

Hello! I’ve been reading through all of the past posts on here, but I’ve run into a question that I can’t seem to find an answer for.

Quick Background: My daughter is going to go through recruitment this fall. I was never involved in Greek life when I was in college, but my older sister was. She’s helped my daughter a lot so far, but she tends to be a Negative Nancy about everything, so I'm also doing my own research. This site is a godsend and has saved me from asking so many common questions!

Between my daughter’s connections, my sister’s connections, and people that I know, it looks like she will have at least one (and in most cases two) recommendation for each house at the university she is attending. The problem is that there is one house where all three of us found someone who agreed to write a rec for her. On top of that, my kiddo works at a summer camp every year, and one of the adults that she is working with this year got very excited when she heard that my daughter planned to do Recruitment, and volunteered to write a rec for her sorority, which happens to be the one we already have three for. My daughter obviously thanked her and brought her the little packet that we put together for rec writers.

My sister kind of freaked out when she heard about this, because four recs is obsessive and the sorority will think she’s trying too hard. Of course, my daughter was never going to tell someone kind enough to volunteer that she didn’t need her rec, but my sister is making her stress a little bit. Is this really that big of a deal? From reading past posts here, it’s possible to get a rec from an acquaintance that you didn’t even know was planning to send one in, so I can’t believe she’s going to be the first person in history to have more than two recs for a house.

I understand that Recs won’t decide your Recruitment fate, but having more than two for one house won’t really hurt her, will it?

Thank you!

Last edited by EliBean; 06-15-2018 at 04:59 PM. Reason: Because I swear I can spell.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 06-15-2018, 08:17 PM
thetalady's Avatar
thetalady thetalady is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Big D
Posts: 2,682
No, it won't hurt. Most of the chapter membership won't even know anything about the recs. Good luck to her!
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 06-15-2018, 08:34 PM
FSUZeta FSUZeta is offline
Super Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: naples, florida
Posts: 15,250
Ditto what Thetalady said. It shouldn't hurt her. Best wishes for a successful recruitment!
__________________
I live in Fantasyland and I have waterfront property.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 06-15-2018, 11:53 PM
Titchou Titchou is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 3,990
Should be a non issue...and depending on where she is going, it could be great!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 06-16-2018, 11:16 AM
ChioLu ChioLu is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: SoCal
Posts: 1,060
I know someone who had 17 recs for 1 chapter. I was asked to write an 18th rec. I thought that was over the top.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 06-16-2018, 11:31 AM
FSUZeta FSUZeta is offline
Super Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: naples, florida
Posts: 15,250
Yes Lu, 18 is a bit excessive.
__________________
I live in Fantasyland and I have waterfront property.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 06-18-2018, 05:21 PM
AnchorAlumna AnchorAlumna is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Old South
Posts: 2,764
Working on a colonization, I had sent out rec requests for a PNM to alumnae in her large city. Trouble is, I never got any answer, so I just kept sending requests out to various women - she was a great girl and we wanted her.
Then all the requests came rolling back - we received at least 7 sponsor forms, including several that were invaluable from personal friends.
One would have done it, but it was nice to have more.
__________________

Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 06-18-2018, 07:29 PM
NYCMS NYCMS is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 214
I was an active many decades ago, so take my input for what it might be worth...any more than 3 recs always seemed a bit much, like a girl was trying too hard. Three recs gives a chapter enough input from a variety of people (a teacher, a relative, a whoever) without going overboard.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 06-18-2018, 07:45 PM
Cheerio Cheerio is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: where there's water there's life, so we must really be living!
Posts: 2,557
Please don't continue to worry about what you and your daughter can't control. What you, and others, have already done is done.

Have your daughter read-through all the positive advice given here in your thread (and within other recommended GC threads) and let her make the very best of what ought to be a beneficial college situation no matter her outcome.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 06-19-2018, 11:27 AM
naraht naraht is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Rockville,MD,USA
Posts: 3,039
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou View Post
Should be a non issue...and depending on where she is going, it could be great!
(Co-ed Service Fraternity member here who has just been on the board for a long time)

Also depends on what the recruitment looks like at that school. You may want to give generalities as to where your daughter is going (athletic conference is probably at about the right level of generality). There is one set of answers on most things for the SEC (southeastern conference) where I swear that the reason for baby ultrasounds is to determine whether there will be a need to ask for recommends...

OTOH, at a smaller school where Greek Life doesn't dominate the social environment, things might be a little bit different)
__________________
Because "undergrads, please abandon your national policies and make something up" will end well --KnightShadow
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 06-19-2018, 09:10 PM
EliBean EliBean is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 18
Thank you so much for all the comments and advice. It certainly made my daughter feel better, even if she was a tad bit horrified that I posted to ask the question. I've also talked with my sister about not stressing my poor kiddo out any more than necessary. She's already super excited about going away to school, but also incredibly nervous (although I think I might be more nervous!). My sister loves her niece and has been very helpful through the recruitment process so far, but she's pretty negative about her going though it in general (at least to me), so it's nice to have some back up that it will be fine.

naraht, to answer your question, it is an SEC school. That's one of the reasons I didn't think having four recs for one sorority could possibly be that big of a deal. Everyone says to have one or two for each sorority, and even if that one sorority writes her off as trying too hard for having more, at least there are plenty of other options.

Anyway, thank you again. I've found a lot of answers to my Mom Questions with the search function, which has been great. At this point, I think we're just down to outfits for recruitment (which is my daughter's job), and making sure that everything is ready to ship our baby too far away in a few months.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 06-19-2018, 09:21 PM
NYCMS NYCMS is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 214
Quote:
Originally Posted by EliBean View Post
it is an SEC school.
I wish your daughter the best - there are lot of threads on here about SEC rush - not sure if you're familiar with SEC schools (you mention "shipping our baby too far away) or if your sister was at an SEC school, but it's a whole different animal than any other region, so those threads will be really valuable.

Also there some great threads of sticking it out through the whole process since rush can be tough and challenging. You'll read plenty of threads about girls who were unsure of the house they were bid to, but wound up loving it.

I hope you'll come back and update us this fall - and good luck to you as well - I know rush can be tough on moms too!
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 06-19-2018, 09:45 PM
Titchou Titchou is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 3,990
Yes,SEC is a different animal - as I can attest being an Alabama alum. But it is VERY exciting and all the groups are great. She can't go wrong keeping an open mind!
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 06-19-2018, 10:36 PM
aephi alum aephi alum is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: The Big Easy
Posts: 9,796
Quote:
Originally Posted by naraht View Post
There is one set of answers on most things for the SEC (southeastern conference) where I swear that the reason for baby ultrasounds is to determine whether there will be a need to ask for recommends...
I'm sorry but this is too funny! Honestly, I don't think I would have stood a snowball's chance in hell (or, warmer yet, New Orleans in summer... guess where I live ) of making it through an SEC recruitment, as my mother (who went to school in the UK) knew nothing about the greek system, and my father was actively anti-greek and VERY unhappy when I pledged. As it was, I attended a school in the Northeast where recruitment was a cakewalk compared to SEC schools, and I never saw a rec for any of our PNMs.

EliBean, from what I understand (having hung around GC for well over a decade) four recs won't hurt at at an SEC school.
__________________
AEΦ ... Multa Corda, Una Causa ... Celebrating Over 100 Years of Sisterhood
Have no place I can be since I found Serenity, but you can't take the sky from me...
Only those who risk going too far, find out how far they can go.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 06-19-2018, 11:41 PM
EliBean EliBean is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYCMS View Post
I wish your daughter the best - there are lot of threads on here about SEC rush - not sure if you're familiar with SEC schools (you mention "shipping our baby too far away) or if your sister was at an SEC school, but it's a whole different animal than any other region, so those threads will be really valuable.

Also there some great threads of sticking it out through the whole process since rush can be tough and challenging. You'll read plenty of threads about girls who were unsure of the house they were bid to, but wound up loving it.

I hope you'll come back and update us this fall - and good luck to you as well - I know rush can be tough on moms too!
I'm pretty familiar with how crazy SEC recruitment can be. I actually grew up a few hours from the school she is going to, and have heard the horror stories. My husband and I went to an ACC school in our home state, and my sister went to a LAC in the north, though, so we haven't lived it yet. We moved out west a couple of years ago, so it feels like we're shipping her too far away, even though she will have family within a few hours driving time, and friends at the school with her.

So far, she seems to be pretty laid back about the actual recruitment part. She really just wants to make friends and have fun. She knows that there's a lot that she can't control, and while I'd say she's equal to what everyone describes as a good candidate as far as looks, grades, activities and volunteerism goes, she has a couple of things that might be held against her, so she's prepared for that too.

I will definitely come back and let you know how it goes in the fall. She's nervous and excited and honestly ready for summer to be over. Me? I wish it would slow down. I've read a couple of threads suggesting a lot of wine, and I think I'm gonna need it from the moment we leave her at school, not just through recruitment.

Thanks!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Recs southern1 Alpha Chi Omega 1 07-30-2011 06:16 AM
Recs: do or die???? kdonline Recruitment 20 07-17-2006 03:06 PM
recs Ocalagirl Delta Delta Delta 1 06-07-2006 07:47 PM
Recs OUSoonerGal Kappa Alpha Theta 2 07-08-2004 11:46 PM
recs shorty5feet2 Recruitment 40 01-08-2004 11:13 PM



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:59 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.