D&R Random - Page 748

Phrozen Sands · #**11206** 10-01-2014, 11:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diamond Girl

I never said I wasn't out cold, because I am, especially to some dude who wants to lie and try to talk his way into my pants. I said YOU are out cold, regardless of what frat you pledged.

And based on what you said, YOU are out-cold regardless of what groupie group you decided to join.

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Why does the man have to know that she knows he's got this?

It certainly isn't about adulthood, maturity, and financial stability or else women would equally have to know that he knows that she's got this. It is about gendered standards and patriarchy. And that's why people like myself have a problem with that.

But to each their own as long as the patriarchal and traditional side stops presenting their perspective as THE perspective ordained by God, humanity, true manhood, true womanhood, masculinity, femininity, etc.

Who are you to tell folks what they can present and what they can't present on here? I'm good with either side. But if you have issues with the other side, then find a man who also has issues with it, if you haven't already, instead of posting that you have issues with it over and over and over and over, again. We get it. It comes down to what makes you happy with you and yours.

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

We only have one, relatively short, life. Live it how you want it to be lived. Don't let people tell you what you want and what makes you happy as it pertains to self-identity, relationships, and definitions of family.

You posted this, but then yet you come on here telling the other side that their perspective is wrong, but yours is right.

DrPhil · #**11207** 10-01-2014, 11:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phrozen Sands

Who are you to tell folks what they can present and what they can't present on here?

You are smart enough (I could be wrong) to not take that so literally. I don't give a shit what GCers present and how they present as long as we aren't shocked by the existence and presentation of differing opinions about relationships. We can all use that reminder for topics for which we have strong opinions.

And I find it humorous and ironic that you assume that my comments even remotely pertain to my relationship with my Significant Other (yes, there are men who also challenge patriarchy). Phrozen, you are the one who types in here about your search for the "right one". I should be telling you to hurry up and find her rather than typing about your search over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. We get it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phrozen Sands

You posted this, but then yet you come on here telling the other side that their perspective is wrong, but yours is right.

Don't worry, Phrozen, the world will remain patriarchal regardless of what I believe. Feel better now? Good.

Phrozen Sands · #**11208** 10-01-2014, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

You are smart enough (I could be wrong) to not take that so literally. I don't give a shit what GCers present and how they present as long as we aren't shocked by the existence and presentation of differing opinions.

Whether you give a shit or not is not the issue. I don't believe either side is wrong or right. Again, it comes down to what makes the couple happy. I also don't think either side is shocked by the different opinions that have been posted. At least the posts I've read from both sides of the coin don't read that way to me.

Phrozen Sands · #**11209** 10-01-2014, 11:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Don't worry, Phrozen, the world will remain patriarchal regardless of what I believe. Feel better now? Good.

Again, not everybody feels that way. There are people who feel as you do, and then there are those who don't.

DrPhil · #**11210** 10-01-2014, 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phrozen Sands

Again, not everybody feels that way. There are people who feel as you do.

Of course. Certainly you don't think that I feel alone in my egalitarianism.

But, the world will still remain patriarchal.

TonyB06 · #**11211** 10-01-2014, 12:00 PM

I came in here to respond but Phrozen pretty much presented my thoughts.

Carry on, bruh....

DrPhil · #**11212** 10-01-2014, 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phrozen Sands

I don't believe either side is wrong or right. Again, it comes down to what makes the couple happy.

It can't just be about what makes people happy when one side is presented as the true definition of manhood/womanhood and based on "truth" (religion and whatever else people use to define "truth"). I am not talking about this GC thread (just as I wasn't talking about this GC thread earlier when I said "as long as the patriarchal and traditional side stops presenting their perspective as...")--the topics that we discuss on GC span far beyond GC therefore most of my posts on GC are not about GC people, places, and things.

My older post that you quoted about not letting people define your life/happiness/definition of family? This is exactly what I was talking about in that post. That post was "reminding" us all to think critically and consciously about tradition before concluding (based on religion, family opinions, etc.) that tradition is what makes them happy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phrozen Sands

I also don't think either side is shocked by the different opinions that have been posted.

You must have missed TonyB06's response to my post.

TonyB06 · #**11213** 10-01-2014, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

My older post that you quoted about not letting people define your life/happiness/definition of family? This is exactly what I was talking about in that post. That post was "reminding" people to think critically and consciously about tradition before concluding (based on religion, family opinions, etc.) that tradition is what makes them happy.

You must have missed TonyB06's response to my post.

I think you mistakenly assume that people haven't already thought critically and consciously about tradition before concluding that it is (or at least is a big part) of what makes them happy.

It's ironic. You think the other side speaks with the presumption of truth. That's exactly how your posts come across. That's what Phrozen was expressing.

What would Phrozen have missed about my response to your post? I asked you two questions about the reasoning behind your negative assumption about the guy wanting to pay for the date. You came back with something about escorts/paying for time and guys wanting to be a second father figure?

DrPhil · #**11214** 10-01-2014, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TonyB06

I think you mistakenly assume that people haven't already thought critically and consciously about tradition before concluding that it is (or at least is a big part) of what makes them happy.

Some people have. Some people have not.

I certainly am not the only person in this thread who discusses these topics with people outside of GC and reads the literature on these topics. There are people in the U.S. and around the world who are told they have no choice but to live exactly as they are told by their parents, their religion, etc. Therefore, these people give no second thought to what they are told. If they are happy at all their happiness is within the context of not having a choice either way. Seeing as though most societies are patriarchal and traditional in terms of gender, sexual orientation, and sexuality, that means that a lot of people are subscribing to traditionalism for the sake of conformity and from fear that something negative would figuratively or literally happen if they did not conform.

Again, I am not talking about GC. If what I say in any of my posts pertains to anyone on GC, that is not of my own doing. GC is only a small percentage of the billions of people in the world.

DubaiSis · #**11215** 10-01-2014, 01:32 PM

Ok, I just now noticed your siggy line. I'm both honored and appalled. Have you been listening to Kappa and now think I look like Yoda?

On this continuing discussion, I understand the nuance of this argument. I choose to stick with the traditional patriarchal paradigm because it's too damn hard to find the 4 guys on the planet who get it. And regardless of how it SHOULD be, trusting that "he's got this" on a financial level does build trust that he's not a 50 year old delinquent who can't afford to entertain a date. Because that speaks to some other issues that are not quite as easy to quantify early in a dating scenario.

DrPhil · #**11216** 10-01-2014, 02:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

Ok, I just now noticed your siggy line. I'm both honored and appalled. Have you been listening to Kappa and now think I look like Yoda?

LOL. Yoda is just the first "wise yet humorous" symbol that came to mind. I shall remove Yoda.

Quote:

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

I choose to stick with the traditional patriarchal paradigm because it's too damn hard to find the 4 guys on the planet who get it.

I completely understand and that is a perfect illustration of my posts.

Quote:

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

And regardless of how it SHOULD be, trusting that "he's got this" on a financial level does build trust that he's not a 50 year old delinquent who can't afford to entertain a date. Because that speaks to some other issues that are not quite as easy to quantify early in a dating scenario.

But you also know that a man paying for a date(s) doesn't mean he has money...isn't a loser, etc.

DubaiSis · #**11217** 10-01-2014, 03:04 PM

Oh trust me, I know that first hand. But at least he isn't so broke/cheap that he CAN'T.

No need to remove. It just made me laugh. I used to work with some women (huge byotches) who called me The Wizard of Oz because I could answer any computer format question. But they weren't using it as a compliment. Not everyone can appreciate my greatness, which winds us back to the subject at hand.

PersistentDST · #**11218** 10-01-2014, 03:10 PM

Ever see someone that is attractive in pictures, but way more attractive in real life?!

DubaiSis · #**11219** 10-01-2014, 04:44 PM

I have a friend who is model-level beautiful in real life and I've never seen a good picture of her. She looks like whatshername David Bowie's wife in real life (from years ago when she was on the runway). On pictures, not so much. Not ugly but nothing to write home about.

PersistentDST · #**11220** 10-01-2014, 05:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

I have a friend who is model-level beautiful in real life and I've never seen a good picture of her. She looks like whatshername David Bowie's wife in real life (from years ago when she was on the runway). On pictures, not so much. Not ugly but nothing to write home about.

Maybe it's something about being more natural when you aren't taking pictures. The gentleman I'm referencing is attractive in general, but real-life I was in full swoon mode.