Prefernce night

PNMmom2011 · #1 08-07-2012, 06:09 PM

Hi, I have some questions about preference night and would also like some advice.

This is the dress my daughter purchased for preference night.
She plans to wear small black heels or nude colored once along with pearls.

A chapter at the school that she attends also suggested a nice black dress for PNMs

Also this is what a sororitysugar on tumblr said about the dress that she purchased
"*while this dress is very attractive, i strongly recommend NOT wearing all black or all white on preference night. many, if not most, chapters will be dressed in black or white for this special night, and you don’t want to blend in with the actives. you want to look cheerful and shine bright! so, while the style and dressiness is ideal - please select any other color to wear as a PNM. "

Being that she is going to be a sophomore I am friends with parents of girls that have previously gone through recruitment and their daughters wore black dress for prefernce night. My question is, is the dress that she has okay for her to wear?

Thanks for the help!

summer_gphib · #2 08-07-2012, 06:25 PM

It is a beautiful dress, and classic. But a lot of people shy away from wearing all black or white because, just like the person pointed out-- many of the sororities will be wearing all black or all white to pref, and your daughter will want to stand out. That being said, I think she could accessorize this in a fun, yet classy way and stand out. A bright punch of color in a belt and shoes could look really great with this dress.

The key is for your daughter to be dressy and classic, while still standing out in a good way.

ETA: I'm somewhat familiar with the school your daughter is going to, and I'd say she'd be safe with that dress.

Greek_or_Geek? · #3 08-07-2012, 06:33 PM

It all depends on the school.

If it's the norm for PNMs to wear black and your daughter lacks the confidence to wear something different, it will affect the way she presents herself that night. She also may be looked at a little differently by some chapters for not wearing black and not necessarily in a positive way.

There is also the psychology of wearing something similar to the chapter members. I think on some level, it sends a subliminal message that "she belongs here."

That said, she should wear what she is comfortable wearing. This is her recruitment, not sorority sugar's, yours or any member of Greekchat's.

PS - You understand that by posting her school and her pref dress online that you are revealing her identity here?

PNMmom2011 · #4 08-07-2012, 06:36 PM

I'm sorry about that. can you tell me how to add a picture? Also thank you for the advice

Greek_or_Geek? · #5 08-07-2012, 06:41 PM

It really isn't necessary to post that photo and you should probably edit out that facebook link to the chapter.

It's only a photo of a classic black dress being suggested by a chapter at her school for preference. If a chapter at her school is suggesting a classic black dress, this should say a lot to you.

PNMmom2011 · #6 08-07-2012, 06:43 PM

Okay, thank you! It is really appreciated!

DarlingTexan · #7 08-07-2012, 07:00 PM

Check her school's recruitment guide to see if they suggest black? I think wearing black and accessorizing colorful is usually a safe bet!

honeychile · #8 08-07-2012, 10:59 PM

It's classic and classy. If I were your daughter, I would add one colorful acces.sory to stand out from the crowd

PNMmom2011 · #9 08-09-2012, 10:51 PM

Thank you everyone for the advice! I have another question, where my daughter goes to school there are only 4 sororites but on the schedule for her recruitement it has 4 events for each day, does that mean that she would attend all of the sororites each day or does like most campuses she can only attend a certain amount each day?

Old_Row · #10 08-09-2012, 10:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PNMmom2011

Thank you everyone for the advice! I have another question, where my daughter goes to school there are only 4 sororites but on the schedule for her recruitement it has 4 events for each day, does that mean that she would attend all of the sororites each day or does like most campuses she can only attend a certain amount each day?

That's a question for her to ask her office of Greek Life.

FleurGirl · #11 08-10-2012, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greek_or_Geek?

It all depends on the school.

If it's the norm for PNMs to wear black and your daughter lacks the confidence to wear something different, it will affect the way she presents herself that night. She also may be looked at a little differently by some chapters for not wearing black and not necessarily in a positive way.

There is also the psychology of wearing something similar to the chapter members. I think on some level, it sends a subliminal message that "she belongs here."

It definitely depends on the school. A bright dress can work the other way too, though. If it fits well and is flattering, it can make a great statement and really stand out in a good way. I remember one of my now-sister's brightly colored pref dresses very well because she and I were the same size, and I was dying to borrow it -- and totally did (with permission of course!) after she was initiated!