GreekChat.com Forums  

Go Back   GreekChat.com Forums > Social


Register Now for FREE!
Join GreekChat.com, The Fraternity & Sorority Greek Chat Network. To sign up for your FREE account INSTANTLY fill out the form below!

Username: Password: Confirm Password: E-Mail: Confirm E-Mail:
 
Image Verification
Please enter the six letters or digits that appear in the image opposite.

  I agree to forum rules 

» GC Stats
Members: 311,703
Threads: 115,251
Posts: 2,164,993
Welcome to our newest member, TraceyMile
» Online Users: 410
6 members and 404 guests
LaneSig, sherbertlemons, TXDG, Xidelt
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 08-13-2019, 02:55 AM
sta3535 sta3535 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2019
Posts: 2
Questions about Greek Life (Social Life)

1. Do you enjoy throwing/hosting parties, despite the pros & cons?

- Are they open or Greek only?

- How much do you charge guys/randoms? Guy/Girl Ratio?

- If it's an open party, do you have to name/know a certain number of brothers/sisters in order to get in?

IMO, cleaning up afterwards & kicking people out is probably the hardest stuff to deal with, outside of maintaining the overall crowd level of the party, which can be difficult to manage if it gets out of control.

2. Stereotypically, do Greek life members have a higher alcohol tolerance than those who are independent?

Now, I obviously know that this is just a stereotype, but is it kind of true that some members may be more used to alcohol due to initiations & parties?

3. Why is Greek Life, in general, viewed as cliquish to some people?

Now, another common stereotype is that Greek organizations are cliquish & that they only hang out with members of fraternities/sororities. However, I personally believe that these organizations are great for college resumes and beyond.

Final Concern:

Serious: I was rejected by a fraternity for acting "weird" at an open party that they hosted. A few girls thought that I was acting "creepy", which affected my overall bid, but I have no reelection of doing anything wrong. I just had a good time without trying to hit on anyone. Even though I may have been a little drunk, I usually remember what happened the night before. Furthermore, my party history is clean, so far, which means that they overreacted or saw something that I didn't notice at the time. I partly blame my diagnosis of mild (high functioning) autism, but I eventually got over it & moved on.

However, when I posted my concern on Reddit, people called me an incel, creep, weirdo, player, etc. So, I asked a former Greek member at my college about my negative experience:

His answer: Greek Life isn't for everyone. Every Greek member reacts differently when it comes to questionable party situations. Drunk people react differently to certain situations as well. Now, I'm not saying that it's your fault, but I wouldn't worry about it anymore. It's also important to be smart, safe, & responsible at parties, especially when you start to feel tipsy.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 08-13-2019, 06:15 AM
33girl 33girl is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Hotel Oceanview
Posts: 33,943
First off this is different at every school.

Secondly, alcohol has nothing to do with initiation. If it does, that chapter should lose its charter.

You have no idea why you didn’t get a bid. I doubt that it was solely due to the opinions of a couple girls, unless you were really over the top and offensive.
__________________
It is all 33girl's fault. ~DrPhil
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-13-2019, 11:14 AM
thetalady's Avatar
thetalady thetalady is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Big D
Posts: 2,796
Quote:
Originally Posted by sta3535 View Post
1. Do you enjoy throwing/hosting parties, despite the pros & cons?

- Are they open or Greek only?

- How much do you charge guys/randoms? Guy/Girl Ratio?

- If it's an open party, do you have to name/know a certain number of brothers/sisters in order to get in?

IMO, cleaning up afterwards & kicking people out is probably the hardest stuff to deal with, outside of maintaining the overall crowd level of the party, which can be difficult to manage if it gets out of control.

2. Stereotypically, do Greek life members have a higher alcohol tolerance than those who are independent?

Now, I obviously know that this is just a stereotype, but is it kind of true that some members may be more used to alcohol due to initiations & parties?

3. Why is Greek Life, in general, viewed as cliquish to some people?

Now, another common stereotype is that Greek organizations are cliquish & that they only hang out with members of fraternities/sororities. However, I personally believe that these organizations are great for college resumes and beyond.

Final Concern:

Serious: I was rejected by a fraternity for acting "weird" at an open party that they hosted. A few girls thought that I was acting "creepy", which affected my overall bid, but I have no reelection of doing anything wrong. I just had a good time without trying to hit on anyone. Even though I may have been a little drunk, I usually remember what happened the night before. Furthermore, my party history is clean, so far, which means that they overreacted or saw something that I didn't notice at the time. I partly blame my diagnosis of mild (high functioning) autism, but I eventually got over it & moved on.

However, when I posted my concern on Reddit, people called me an incel, creep, weirdo, player, etc. So, I asked a former Greek member at my college about my negative experience:

His answer: Greek Life isn't for everyone. Every Greek member reacts differently when it comes to questionable party situations. Drunk people react differently to certain situations as well. Now, I'm not saying that it's your fault, but I wouldn't worry about it anymore. It's also important to be smart, safe, & responsible at parties, especially when you start to feel tipsy.
I am afraid that your approach here is pretty indicative of why you were not successful at getting a bid. Back off, buddy.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-13-2019, 11:28 AM
Rod D Rod D is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 54
Any greek org that throws an "open" party these days is asking for problems. Risk control nightmare.

Both Greeks and non-greeks drink, so alcohol tolerance is the same.

If you're interested in rushing a house, it is completely uncool to go there and drink. When you're drunk, you become a risk. If you act like a jackass, you're done. You should treat it like a business event -- one drink only.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-13-2019, 11:54 AM
GoldenAnchor GoldenAnchor is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by sta3535 View Post

3. Why is Greek Life, in general, viewed as cliquish to some people?

Now, another common stereotype is that Greek organizations are cliquish & that they only hang out with members of fraternities/sororities. However, I personally believe that these organizations are great for college resumes and beyond.
I know very few Greek members who “only hang out with members of fraternities/sororities”. There certainly are members who hang out with a large number of Greek members and their social circle consists of other Greeks, this isn’t because they’re being cliquey or exclusive, it’s just what happens when you’re going to all the events you go to and participating in mixers, date parties and going to weekly meetings with your sisters/brothers. You become friends with people you hang out with a lot. I had plenty of friends not involved with Greek life (from classes, other clubs and activities and service work), but I also SAW a lot of my friends at events I was meant to go to for my chapter.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-13-2019, 12:29 PM
AZTheta AZTheta is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: N 37.811092 W -107.664643
Posts: 5,126
Quote:
Originally Posted by sta3535 View Post
I partly blame my diagnosis of mild (high functioning) autism, but I eventually got over it & moved on.
Well. Here's the crux ("vital, basic, decisive or pivotal point") of your situation. Having spent decades diagnosing and treating Autism Spectrum Disorders as part of a multi-disciplinary team, I'm nodding my head at that sentence, buried in all your questions and thoughts in your post. Everything you wrote makes sense to me based on that sentence.

Socially, navigating the Greek Life waters would be extremely challenging for anyone on the spectrum ("high functioning" or not, and BTW that term has fallen out of favor recently). So many neurotypical subtleties and cues that are intuitive to us, yet are almost impossible for neurodivergent people to process. I could videotape the interaction, sit with you, and point out the missteps. You possibly would see what I'm seeing. That's a starting point for treatment. But I digress.

So, as to the other parts of your post: you're showing curiosity about situations (i.e. asking questions to which the answers are apparent) that are intuitive to non-ASD people, which also illustrates the social challenges faced by those on the spectrum. My intent here is to be helpful and look at what you wrote through another lens. Your Greek *fraternity* friend gave you a great explanation! I'm glad that you've moved on. You likely dodged a bullet by not becoming a member of a fraternity (my opinion, folks!).
__________________
"One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." Bertrand Russell, The Triumph of Stupidity
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-13-2019, 09:01 PM
PhilTau PhilTau is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Oregon
Posts: 156
Quote:
Originally Posted by sta3535 View Post
* * * Even though I may have been a little drunk, I usually remember what happened the night before. * * *
If you sometimes don't remember what happened when you were drinking, I suggest you try to stop drinking.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Greek Life Social Media panhelrose Greek Life 7 05-18-2017 07:15 PM
Simple questions about Greek Life that annoy you? Senusret I Greek Life 309 12-26-2012 11:03 AM
Questions about Greek Life (from an outsider [UK]) geryon Greek Life 93 03-03-2009 07:22 PM
Questions about Greek life? (reposted because first had a typo) Autobahnkid Greek Life 3 09-28-2008 11:17 PM
Greek Social Life - Then and Now vtgreekalum Greek Life 92 01-03-2008 08:55 PM



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:52 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.