Informal Recruitment Questions..

[LadyKnight]

Hello all,

I have been considering trying to join a sorority as long as I've attended college. However, my first school did not have any Greek organizations and when I transferred to my new university I did not immediately try to join because I was afraid that I would be too old to be considered. I am now a college junior (senior if you go by number of years) but to make things simple, a college junior. I have at least two more semesters left at my college to finish my minor and my honors thesis research and whatnot.

That being said I'm only really interested in one house, the one house who is actually openly participating in informal recruitment. I have a few friends in the house already, two of which I'm fairly close with and a couple that have the some classes with me. I have attended every posted event since I expressed interest in joining the organization, but have yet to receive a bid...actually no one has according to my one close friend in the sorority. They recently moved the bid day back because of a lack of girls and now there's no listed date. I feel that I've really connected with a lot of the girls, I mean the majority know my name and seem very nice. My close friend who is in the sorority has also talked to a lot of the girls and they seem to like me and haven't heard anything bad about me. However, I was dropped from the facebook group for the spring recruitment. I talked to the VP of membership, she said it must've been a mistake and not to worry about anything. Upon trying to rejoin I was denied, so the question is am I wasting my time in trying to join this sorority?

I really like their philanthropy, their colors, their motto, the girls in the sorority and from the girls I've talked to I've done nothing wrong. I deleted all photos on facebook that pictured me with any drink that could be considered alcoholic, even though I am over 21 and rarely ever drink I do attend friends parties where drinking occurs. All of that being said I have a really good GPA (3.7), lead study groups, am active in events and clubs that I belong to...so I'm kinda confused about the whole thing. Any and all advice would be most appreciated. Thank you ladies. =D

Edit: My one friend in the house has told me (Against the rules, but she's too sweet to not try to help) that she gave me a stunning vote and that she mentioned that I would be willing to live in the house, which I am. I don't know if this will influence my acceptance or not. I do know that they have at least one completely open room at the house this semester.

[AOII Angel]

No one can tell you what you want to know. Sooner or later they will issue bids, and you will know if you made the cut. I wouldn't advise bugging your friends about it. It sounds like they've done everything they can to get you a spot, but it takes more than just a couple people to get you in. If it doesn't work out, don't blame your friends.

[Drolefille]

Are you wasting your time: Do you want to join? If so, then no. If not then yes.

If no one's been given a bid then I don't see why you'd necessarily walk away now. If you don't get a bid, re-evaluate. Your friend is a better barometer than we are, particularly if she's violating MS rules to talk to you.

[adpiucf]

Don't let it consume you. It is like waiting for a guy to call. Don't do that, either. Go live your life, go on some dates, keep busy, etc.


At this point, you have done all you can and your friends in the sorority are advocating for you. If there's another event you can attend, go and attend. I do agree that the FB group thing sounds fish, and I would not
go out of my way to contact the Membership VP any further. Whether or not it was an accident, to inform them you were not a member on their Spring page and then be denied when you later try to join up sounds shady to me, too.

That being said, I would not read anything further into it. There are a lot of different people making decisions, and the Membership VP may not have communicated to the person in charge of the FB page, etc. As your friend told you, no bids have been given. I would imagine their advisers are pressuring them to fill to chapter total and that spot in the house, so I would also imagine they can't stall forever.

Live your life. They know how to get in touch with you.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by LadyKnight

However, I was dropped from the facebook group for the spring recruitment. I talked to the VP of membership, she said it must've been a mistake and not to worry about anything. Upon trying to rejoin I was denied, so the question is am I wasting my time in trying to join this sorority?

Yes.

If you talked to her specifically about this issue and she said it was a computer mistake and was aware of it, and they're looking for interested women in that manner and you were a viable candidate (which you are as far as grades and having a uterus) she should have SENT YOU AN INVITE to rejoin. The fact that you were denied when you tried?? After pointing it out? The only way they could get more blatant is to send you a giant banner in the mail that says KTHXBYE.

Your friend in the chapter sounds like she has been pushing you to the point that she's trying to shove you down sisters' throats, and if they were neutral on you before, they're probably sick of hearing about you now and you would have to be super blazing fire awesomesauce before they'd give you the benefit of the doubt. Also if she's giving you all this inside information - and that she's telling you things like they have an open room, that's really sister info - that's not going to go over too well.

I have no idea about the climate of your school and this chapter concerning alcohol, but if you're 21+ and have gone overboard eliminating any pictures of a **legal** activity that you've engaged in, that could be a negative factor rather than a positive and make you seem stuffy. I don't mean a picture of you doing a kegstand, I mean a picture of women in a restaurant having a glass of wine. The reason sorority women who are of age don't display alcohol photos is because the sorority forces them not to. You're not in a sorority. You don't have to follow those rules.

[Barbie's_Rush]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Yes.

If you talked to her specifically about this issue and she said it was a computer mistake and was aware of it, and they're looking for interested women in that manner and you were a viable candidate (which you are as far as grades and having a uterus) she should have SENT YOU AN INVITE to rejoin. The fact that you were denied when you tried?? After pointing it out? The only way they could get more blatant is to send you a giant banner in the mail that says KTHXBYE.

Agreed. I don't know any other way that could be interpreted. It sounds like you have become that girl.

[Alumiyum]

Echoing what everyone else has said, you've done all you can so leave it be. And stop sitting around worrying about it. I do not agree that the facebook group snafu is an automatic rejection. However you've done everything right up until this point. If you keep bugging your friends about it or keep bugging other actives you WILL hurt your chances. Just let it be. You'll either get a bid or you won't but either way there's nothing else you can do to strengthen the chance of getting one.

Also, remember that one or two friends in a sorority does not equal a bid.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

I'm really interested in this guy in my math class, and I've gone to see his band play three times now. I texted him the other day, and he never texted me back, but when I saw him in class, he said he never got the text. My friend said that he's totally into me, but he still hasn't asked me out. I know he's not involved with anyone else. Do you think I have a chance with him?

[tld221]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

I'm really interested in this guy in my math class, and I've gone to see his band play three times now. I texted him the other day, and he never texted me back, but when I saw him in class, he said he never got the text. My friend said that he's totally into me, but he still hasn't asked me out. I know he's not involved with anyone else. Do you think I have a chance with him?

exactly.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by LadyKnight

Hello all,

I have been considering trying to join a sorority as long as I've attended college. However, my first school did not have any Greek organizations and when I transferred to my new university I did not immediately try to join because I was afraid that I would be too old to be considered. I am now a college junior (senior if you go by number of years) but to make things simple, a college junior. I have at least two more semesters left at my college to finish my minor and my honors thesis research and whatnot.

That being said I'm only really interested in one house, the one house who is actually openly participating in informal recruitment. I have a few friends in the house already, two of which I'm fairly close with and a couple that have the some classes with me. I have attended every posted event since I expressed interest in joining the organization, but have yet to receive a bid...actually no one has according to my one close friend in the sorority. They recently moved the bid day back because of a lack of girls and now there's no listed date. I feel that I've really connected with a lot of the girls, I mean the majority know my name and seem very nice. My close friend who is in the sorority has also talked to a lot of the girls and they seem to like me and haven't heard anything bad about me. However, I was dropped from the facebook group for the spring recruitment. I talked to the VP of membership, she said it must've been a mistake and not to worry about anything. Upon trying to rejoin I was denied, so the question is am I wasting my time in trying to join this sorority?

I really like their philanthropy, their colors, their motto, the girls in the sorority and from the girls I've talked to I've done nothing wrong. I deleted all photos on facebook that pictured me with any drink that could be considered alcoholic, even though I am over 21 and rarely ever drink I do attend friends parties where drinking occurs. All of that being said I have a really good GPA (3.7), lead study groups, am active in events and clubs that I belong to...so I'm kinda confused about the whole thing. Any and all advice would be most appreciated. Thank you ladies. =D

Edit: My one friend in the house has told me (Against the rules, but she's too sweet to not try to help) that she gave me a stunning vote and that she mentioned that I would be willing to live in the house, which I am. I don't know if this will influence my acceptance or not. I do know that they have at least one completely open room at the house this semester.

You know, it sort of rubs me the wrong way that you continue to reference the fact that that this sorority has openings (house space, only chapter doing informal, etc) when wondering why you haven't received a bid.

Your post gives me the feeling that you think you're entitled to a bid because this is a smaller group.

Sort of like when girls say "I don't ever see any other girls taking to Bobby, but when I asked him out, he said no! What gives???"

Small chapter doesn't = auto bid because you have friends in it and you walked through their doors.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

You know, it sort of rubs me the wrong way that you continue to reference the fact that that this sorority has openings (house space, only chapter doing informal, etc) when wondering why you haven't received a bid.

Your post gives me the feeling that you think you're entitled to a bid because this is a smaller group.

Sort of like when girls say "I don't ever see any other girls taking to Bobby, but when I asked him out, he said no! What gives???"

Small chapter doesn't = auto bid because you have friends in it and you walked through their doors.

Thanks - I was going to point out this part too but wasn't sure how to put it.