Recommendation Caution to PNM's - Page 7

KSUViolet06 · #91 06-03-2007, 06:26 PM

I posted this in another thread about recs and I thought it might be helpful if I posted it again here:

Girls, understand that getting recommendations can be difficult, especially if you don't live in an area with lots of greek women or you don't have many greeks in your family.

It just takes persistence. You have to exhaust all of your available resources & contacts. Think of EVERY place you go regularly where there are women who know you well. Any of them could be a sorority alumna.
Some of these places include:

*school (teachers, counselors, coaches)
*church or other place of worship ( sorority women might attend your church service or lead your bible study)
*camps you attend(ed) (your camp counselors might be sorority women)
*work (co-workers or their family members might be greek)
*your parents (their co-workers or friends, get their Christmas card or email lists out)

Also, you can even ask the MEN you know. For example, your dad's bowling buddy might me married to a sorority alumna or have a daughter who is Greek.

Good luck ladies!

DeltaBetaBaby · #92 06-03-2007, 07:16 PM

Good post. As an addition, if you know sorority women who are not in the groups that have chapters on your campus, ASK THEM ANYWAY. They are likely to know more sorority women, or be able to help point you in the right direction. Off of the top of my head, I could think of at least 5 orgs I could help with, and most other sorority women have that same ability.

dukemama · #93 06-04-2007, 07:21 AM

I agree, definitely ask ANYONE you know for recs. I wasn't a Greek in college and even I could direct a PNM to alumnae in at least 4 different NPC sororities.

FSUZeta · #94 06-04-2007, 11:07 AM

and don't give up! i was from a very small town and managed to have recs. to most of the sororities at fl. state. some were from friends families, my family, teachers, fellow church members, parents friends. when you find one sorority member, most likely they will know an alumna of another sorority. network!!

KSUViolet06 · #95 06-04-2007, 08:39 PM

I posted this in another rec related thread, but I'm going to post it again here because I think it's important for girls to know this:

Some school's recruitment websites & guide books will tell you:

"It is the responsibility of each sorority to secure recommendations for each potential member."

This isn't always the case.

At most large schools like LSU, UGA, Bama & Ole Miss, there are HUNDREDS of girls rushing. It is nearly impossible for every sorority to get a rec for EVERY SINGLE girl.

So don't depend on the sorority to get them for you, even if the website, recruitment book, greek life office, etc says they will.

If you get recs for yourself, you can guarantee that you'll have them when recruitment starts.

adpiucf · #96 06-26-2007, 02:41 PM

Please don't wait until the last minute to start asking for recs! The moment you even think about going through recruitment, start soliciting those recs.

Rec writers have lives, too, and you shouldn't cause them stress or inconvenience because you waited until the week before recruitment to start lining up recs. Rec writers very much want to help you-- but please be considerate of their time. They are doing you a favor--- the least you can do is give them at least 4-6 weeks lead time.

ETA: If you just decided to go through recruitment the week before/day of and you're frustrated that rec writers are not as readily available, I hate to say this-- but that's your problem. You need to plan ahead for anything that requires you to ask another person to contribute her time on your behalf.

KSUViolet06 · #97 06-26-2007, 03:11 PM

Yes girls please keep in mind that some schools require all recs to be submitted as early as JULY!

So please be timely and start lining them up early.

GatorDG · #98 09-02-2007, 11:28 AM

I just had dinner last night with a friend whose daughter is a freshman at SMU. The daughter had just attended a Panhellenic rush (sorry recruitment - I'm old) information meeting and was told that THEY DO NOT NEED RECS!!!! I assured my friend that, especially at a school like SMU, this was not the case. It seems as if NPC, through various school panhellenics, is trying to move away from requiring recs, but the chapters are still requiring them. This can be very confusing to rushees and making life difficult for the glo as well as the pnm. This can result in hurt feelings and disappointing recruitments. This is an area that seems to need attention and consistency.

Benzgirl · #99 09-02-2007, 01:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GatorDG

I just had dinner last night with a friend whose daughter is a freshman at SMU. The daughter had just attended a Panhellenic rush (sorry recruitment - I'm old) information meeting and was told that THEY DO NOT NEED RECS!!!! I assured my friend that, especially at a school like SMU, this was not the case. It seems as if NPC, through various school panhellenics, is trying to move away from requiring recs, but the chapters are still requiring them. This can be very confusing to rushees and making life difficult for the glo as well as the pnm. This can result in hurt feelings and disappointing recruitments. This is an area that seems to need attention and consistency.

Unfortunately, they have to say that. At some schools it is not impossible to get through recruitment without one, but come on...it's SMU. I'm not a mother bu I feel the pain of someone listens to information that is misleading.

honeychile · #**100** 09-02-2007, 01:53 PM

I think the above shows yet another university trying so hard to be pc, that they shoot themselves in the foot! It's like being told you're going to a regular party, and find out it's a formal - just not fair to those trying to put their best foot forward.

I'll go a step further and say that, even though the vast majority of Northern schools don't require recs, if you have the option, use it! There's never a wrong time to start networking.

Lastly, take a moment and jot a note (or an email, she sighs) to the women nice enough to give you a rec. Thank them for the rec, and let them know that if you got a bid, and from whom. If it's not to their GLO, you can always say "While I really liked the ABC's, I felt more at home at QRS." If you didn't get a bid, tell them that you may be back to them next year ("I didn't get a bid this year, but just may try again in the future...") We understand that not everyone is going to love our sorority, and I promise you, we will not be offended!

asa06091987 · #**101** 12-23-2007, 08:39 PM

maybe its because i go to school in southern ny... we don't need recs...

SWTXBelle · #**102** 12-23-2007, 08:44 PM

Some national/international headquarters require recs, even if the local panhellenic culture doesn't. As has been said before, they are always a good idea. Far better to have them, and not need them, than to need them, and not have them.

Kitemom · #**103** 01-18-2008, 12:14 AM

My daughter grandmother was able to secure several recs for her. "Of couse they would be happy to help and by the way so and so can write one also." My daughter delivered a package of resume and photo's to one of my mothers friends who told her don't worry I'll get recs written for you.

violetpretty · #**104** 03-30-2008, 06:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Some national/international headquarters require recs, even if the local panhellenic culture doesn't. As has been said before, they are always a good idea. Far better to have them, and not need them, than to need them, and not have them.

It says that a rec is required to become initiated in our Promise Book (NM manual). However, I have been an initiated member for 4 years and I'd really like to know who wrote that rec for me, or if that rule has changed.

deadbear80 · #**105** 03-30-2008, 08:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by violetpretty

It says that a rec is required to become initiated in our Promise Book (NM manual). However, I have been an initiated member for 4 years and I'd really like to know who wrote that rec for me, or if that rule has changed.

In some organizations, undergrad members can write recs. Your chapter may have secured a rec for you through someone you already knew in the chapter without your knowledge of her doing so.
I also know that some chapters will contact Alumnae Panhellenic chapters when the list of registered girls comes out (especially when recruitment is deferred) to try to get recs that way. So you just never know...