Volunteer Position vs. Alum Chapter

LouisaMay · #1 06-26-2011, 06:59 AM

I'm moving soon, and I'll be leaving my wonderful alum chapter and my district volunteer position. My new area has an alum chapter about one hour away, and although there is no collegiate chapter in my state, the district is very much alive and well. I will have a newborn baby along with 2 little boys by the time we move at the end of the summer, so I will not be jumping into both volunteering and chapter activities right away.

I would love some input from others. In terms of staying connected to my sorority, do you think alumnae chapter involvement or volunteering is more beneficial? This might just be a personal preference or personality thing, but your opinions would be great. What has your experience been?

AlphaFrog · #2 06-26-2011, 08:31 AM

Alum chapter. From experience.

FSUZeta · #3 06-26-2011, 08:40 AM

apples and oranges. it depends on what fulfills you. some folks love serving on a national level, while others enjoy the local experience. then you have the dedicated members who want to work with a collegiate chapter.

with three little ones you are going to be stretched thin, so now might be the time to choose one area of involvement within your sorority.

AlphaFrog · #4 06-26-2011, 08:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FSUZeta

with three little ones you are going to be stretched thin, so now might be the time to choose one area of the volunteering within your sorority.

You know how we tell people who went to Podunk U not to give SEC rush advice? Let's just call this that type of thing when I say: No.

FSUZeta · #5 06-26-2011, 09:11 AM

gotcha!

33girl · #6 06-26-2011, 11:26 AM

I will second and say alum chapter as well. Several of my collegiate chapter sisters have gotten involved in the Central PA alum chapter and it's REALLY stoked up their love for ASA again - as well as it seems to enrich their connection to us.

Also, if you became a member of a coaching team (which is what I assume you mean by volunteering), you would be doing it solely online, and having done that, it was just not fulfilling, for me and I'm sure not for the collegians either. YMMV. Keeping in touch with people you already know IRL is one thing, making completely brand new connections is another. Especially if you're trying to advise.

RaggedyAnn · #7 06-27-2011, 08:10 PM

Definitely the alum chapter. As a volunteer, you need to check your email at least once a day for most positions and if you're working with a collegiate chapter, things are time sensitive. Being involved with an alum chapter, you can go to events as you have time. That doesn't mean you can't get back into volunteering though in the future!

als463 · #8 06-28-2011, 11:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl

I will second and say alum chapter as well. Several of my collegiate chapter sisters have gotten involved in the Central PA alum chapter and it's REALLY stoked up their love for ASA again - as well as it seems to enrich their connection to us.

Also, if you became a member of a coaching team (which is what I assume you mean by volunteering), you would be doing it solely online, and having done that, it was just not fulfilling, for me and I'm sure not for the collegians either. YMMV. Keeping in touch with people you already know IRL is one thing, making completely brand new connections is another. Especially if you're trying to advise.

I'd like to ask a different question regarding alumnae involvement vs. volunteering. While in college, when my life revolved around greek life, one of my best friends from high school decided she no longer wanted to be my friend because all I ever talked about was the various greek events I attended and the things my sisters and I did, when we were at school. Okay. I can handle that. Whatever.

The other night, I noticed a really close friend of mine, who lives in another state, from the military de-friended me on FB. I texted her to ask her what was going on. Her response? "We are just at different places in our lives." She is currently going back to school for her A.S. and I am working on another graduate degree. She is not working and I have a steady career. Neither one of us is married or has children. I have fulfilled my military commitment and she is still in, until she is able to ETS. I asked her what she meant about that and she responded with, "You're still into your sorority life" (or however she worded it-because it was worded pretty weird). I told her that I am very involved and I won't apologize for that.

Like many of you, I am proud of my GLO. I am very involved and I have been to various conventions and leadership conferences. In fact, someday I'd love to be a collegiate chapter advisor. My sisters have always been there for me and I know that I have friends from different chapters. Like many of you, I see my GLO as a way to stay connected to the some of the most important people in my life. Needless to say, my feelings were hurt.

So, my question is: Is there such a thing as being "too" involved in your GLO?

DrPhil · #9 06-28-2011, 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by als463

So, my question is: Is there such a thing as being "too" involved in your GLO?

Of course. Everything has a limit. You determine that limit for yourself.

Examples that may not apply to you:

If you do not have any friends or close acquaintances who are not your sorority sisters, not even one, you need to ask yourself why this is the case.

If all of your conversations and interactions (outside of your family, significant other, and colleagues) revolve around Greekdom, you need to ask yourself why this is the case.

als463 · #10 06-28-2011, 12:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Of course. Everything has a limit. You determine that limit for yourself.

If you do not have any friends or close acquaintances who are not your sorority sisters, not even one, you need to ask yourself why this is the case. If all of your conversations and interactions (outside of your family, significant other, and colleagues) revolve around Greekdom, you need to ask yourself why this is the case.

That's just it...I do. In fact, I have many friends in my graduate program. I have friends from when I was in another graduate program, as well. I have friends from the military and friends from my time as an undergrad (who aren't Greek). I have friends from work and everything else. Some of my closest friends are NOT my sisters. I was really annoyed by that. I'm busy with school and work. I feel like my conversations always revolve around my career or what's going on in school. I'm not close with any of my hs friends because we've all taken different paths but, that one friend from hs...well, I think she just used it as an excuse. This friend just recently broke up with her boyfriend but, I felt it was very passive aggressive to just delete me. I was shocked. I enjoy my involvement and I love meeting other Greeks (even if they aren't in my GLO). It's a way to spark a conversation. I'm proud of the community service we do. I wear my badge with pride, even if it isn't Founder's Day because it's beautiful. I wear it for other special things like my birthday, and what not. I still wear my letters (usually leaving the stiched letters for inside my home for bed and studying) but, I have other items with letters or crests. Is that wrong? I love the thread about running into other Greeks and I sometime hope that someone stops me to talk about my lettered bag or whatever. I'm sorry. I'm just really hurt by this.

DrPhil · #11 06-28-2011, 12:08 PM

My reply was intended to be generally applicable. You know what you have in your life. If you don't feel like you're too involved in your GLO and it isn't interfering with other aspects of your life, then that's that.

Not everyone is meant to be in your life forever. There are friends (including sorority sisters) whose role in your life will change. You will end up only talking to them on special occasions or not at all. Half of the people who were my tried and true friends when I was in my 20s are mere acquaintances in my 30s. Life is good and life moves on.

als463 · #12 06-28-2011, 12:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

My reply was intended to be generally applicable. You know what you have in your life. If you don't feel like you're too involved in your GLO and it isn't interfering with other aspects of your life, then that's that.

Not everyone is meant to be in your life forever. There are friends (including sorority sisters) whose role in your life will change. You will end up only talking to them on special occasions or not at all. Half of the people who were my tried and true friends when I was in my 20s are mere acquaintances in my 30s. Life is good and life moves on.

I know you meant generally. Thank you for your response. I figured this would be the right thread to post this since we are talking about alum involvement. I really appreciate this more than you know. It was just such a bad way of doing it, on her part (if you ask me). I will continue to stay involved and not care what other people think.

amanda6035 · #13 06-28-2011, 01:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by als463

I'd like to ask a different question regarding alumnae involvement vs. volunteering. While in college, when my life revolved around greek life, one of my best friends from high school decided she no longer wanted to be my friend because all I ever talked about was the various greek events I attended and the things my sisters and I did, when we were at school. Okay. I can handle that. Whatever.

The other night, I noticed a really close friend of mine, who lives in another state, from the military de-friended me on FB. I texted her to ask her what was going on. Her response? "We are just at different places in our lives." She is currently going back to school for her A.S. and I am working on another graduate degree. She is not working and I have a steady career. Neither one of us is married or has children. I have fulfilled my military commitment and she is still in, until she is able to ETS. I asked her what she meant about that and she responded with, "You're still into your sorority life" (or however she worded it-because it was worded pretty weird). I told her that I am very involved and I won't apologize for that.

Like many of you, I am proud of my GLO. I am very involved and I have been to various conventions and leadership conferences. In fact, someday I'd love to be a collegiate chapter advisor. My sisters have always been there for me and I know that I have friends from different chapters. Like many of you, I see my GLO as a way to stay connected to the some of the most important people in my life. Needless to say, my feelings were hurt.

So, my question is: Is there such a thing as being "too" involved in your GLO?

From experience, this goes both ways. I did the military, then sorority, and I have many military friends on FB. When they gripe and complain about military politics, I laugh or roll my eyes, depending on what it is they are commenting about. I'm glad I served, but I'm glad I recognized that it wasn't for me long term. For them, they are very pro-military. For me, I'm involved as an alumna for my sorority. I tried to join a VFW, but I wasn't able to find one that had young vets like myself. I needed people to network with. My sorority afforded me that. The military did not.

Though, I do think it's pretty lame to be "defriended" because you're at different points in your lives. I have FB friends that I have hidden from my newsfeed because they make me want to stick a fork in my eye when I read their latest drama....but that doesnt mean I remove them completely from my list.

Back to the original question, though, my alumna chapter doesnt get together very often, but when we do, it's fun. I enjoy volunteering....more on a local level. I volunteer in multiple capacities right now, but I get much more fulfillment out of the positions where I have a more hands on opportunity.

KSUViolet06 · #14 06-28-2011, 01:14 PM

Everybody is different and everyone is more comfortable with a different level of involvement.

I'm currently holding a regional position but am not super involved with an alumna chapter. The chapter is close to my collegiate chapter and while I LOVE Alpha Beta tons, I wanted to be able to get involved with Sigma on a larger scale and have a chance to get involved with helping other chapters. I couldn't do that by just being in the alumnae chapter and on my chapter's CAB.

Everyone's different. For example: there are people who have been local chapter advisors for years. They wouldn't want to be regional volunteers because they like avising locally.

33girl · #15 06-28-2011, 07:34 PM

To defriend someone because you're at different places in your lives is the height of lame.

If she only feels comfortable being friends with people who are doing the exact same thing she's doing at the exact same time she's doing it, she is going to have a very small life. IMO, good riddance.