Too fat to recruit: or, DePauw, the Sequel

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Things like this make me a little ashamed to be Greek. I support going Greek at my school. I just really don't think we have that problem here. I haven't noticed it, anyway. Not that it's all peachy keen 24/7, but I don't see image as an issue on this campus. Everyone gets to participate in Recruitment. But I don't support that type of Greek system. Sorry. To be that judgemental AFTER promising to be a supportive sister to every OTHER sister is against my personal values.

I know I'm idealistic, it won't change, blahblahblah...but if sisters will damage another sisters' self esteem like that because they are actively recruiting girls who won't want to join their organization if there's one overweight girl...something is wrong. Something needs to be changed. Me, personally...I would have a large problem with admitting PNMs that judgemental into my chapter. I've only been on the "other side" once so far, but I haven't met one like that yet...thank goodness.

[AlexMack]

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS

This is superficial.

The people in that chapter and/or national organization who think this makes a grain of sense need to depledge.

OT! You have Lady Sovereign in your signature. I LOVE YOU!

Also I agree with you.

[SigKapCoug]

This is sad. I think it's unfortunate that this is happening to women who have so much to do for their chapter.

But I also think it is important to note that PNMs DO make very rash decisions based on appearance. I also feel like theres a difference between a woman whos overweight, but she knows how to carry herself and dresses to fit her size - a woman like that, you barely notice she's a big girl - and a women who is overweight and dresses sloppily. Yes, a sorority is more than image, but do any us recruit wearing sweatpants and unwashed hair? No. I'm not saying these heavy women are ugly or sloppy - I'm just saying that we KNOW that when it comes to recruitment you MUST LOOK YOUR BEST.

I see it as a drastic, unfortunate move by that chapters Nationals, but I can also see where nationals is coming from. Unfortunately, they've chosen to hurt sisters in order to "salvage" what they feel they want their "national reputation" to be.

[Ilaria Ame]

bah. whether the girl is sloppy or not, being told by your sisters that you should stay in the back for rush in low. they could have just as easily helped her pick out clothes or offered to do her hair "just for fun" if that was really the problem. sounds like just another shallow group of bitches to me.

edit: well, would you mind posting a link to the origional story? i should read what she said exactly before making such a harsh judgement.

[KSUViolet06]

Stories like this make me glad I don't go to a highly competitive recruitment school.

Question: Why would a national HQ be pressuring an already small chapter to exclude certain sisters from recruitment? That would only make them look smaller.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by SigKapCoug

This is sad. I think it's unfortunate that this is happening to women who have so much to do for their chapter.

But I also think it is important to note that PNMs DO make very rash decisions based on appearance. I also feel like theres a difference between a woman whos overweight, but she knows how to carry herself and dresses to fit her size - a woman like that, you barely notice she's a big girl - and a women who is overweight and dresses sloppily. Yes, a sorority is more than image, but do any us recruit wearing sweatpants and unwashed hair? No. I'm not saying these heavy women are ugly or sloppy - I'm just saying that we KNOW that when it comes to recruitment you MUST LOOK YOUR BEST.

I see it as a drastic, unfortunate move by that chapters Nationals, but I can also see where nationals is coming from. Unfortunately, they've chosen to hurt sisters in order to "salvage" what they feel they want their "national reputation" to be.

Over weight does not equal sloppy. I know of one bigger girl in my chapter that looks about 10 times better than I do on a regular basis. She never goes out without her make up, nails, and hair done. And she can dress ten times better than I can.

PNMs that won't join a chapter just because there is an overweight woman in it are absolutely useless to me. I'm not personally interested in them whatsoever, no matter what THEIR looks, grades, etc. are. They can take it somewhere else.

And if she did not know how to dress or do her hair to her best advantage, why not have some sisters do a "just for fun" makeover, like another poster suggested? It's an easy fix. Make up and hair and clothes that fit the body type make worlds and worlds of difference.

I do believe that it's best to recruit while well groomed. I DON'T think there's a weight limit on that.

[Tom Earp]

If all of this is true, then being a Greek is shallow.

We had a member who was hanicapped and was one of the best members we had for getting things done. He was not worried about so neither were we. He was part of us so everybody took him as one thing only, a Brother of LXA at our chapter.

When ADPi was on our campus, they were called ADPigs. They were the first to recognize us as a local and several LX's married their members. We did a lot of things together when some of the sooty ones did not want to be around us. Sad to say, they are no longer on campus and would love to see them come back!

KD, came on campus and according to the Pixs had some very lovely girls. They lasted 2 years. Why, I do not know.

Go back to HS and see the beauties who are no longer or the wall flowers who are beauties now!

The person inside the skin form is much bigger a person than many and will give more for the love.

Hi, I am Barbi and I belong to ABC, we are neat, no, they are bimbos in many ways!

[Tom Earp]

Originally Posted by porkfriedrice

OT! You have Lady Sovereign in your signature. I LOVE YOU!

Also I agree with you.

Hm, must have changed your name on GC. Doesn't make any difference does it?

Still just you.

[kathykd2005]

Although the OP was pretty vague about the situation, I needed to weigh in on the concept (no pun intended)--that people who are overweight cannot recruit. My chapter was extremely eclectic, with girls that wore a size 0 to girls that probably wore a size 26 or more. As others have said, size does not matter at all--personality is what counts. The best recruiters from my chapter were not those who looked the best, they were the women who showed who they really were, were involved on campus, and were women that others looked up to. Now, this could just be in my case (but I have a sneaking suspicion it's not), but the chapter I was in was the largest, most award winning sorority on campus. The idea that looks=quality is what makes GLOs look bad. It's a negative stereotype that we should work harder to dispel.

[PM_Mama00]

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna

I'll be brutal (yes, I'm overweight, but I'm old)...overweight young women need to realize that they could hurt the chapter as much as help it. This is not to say they cannot be important members with much to contribute. But as a wise national officer once said, in recruitment, first impressions are EVERYTHING. If this young lady can be mature about it, she can tell them that she understands, and offer to do something helpful behind the scenes during recruitment, or at least during the preparation week. Doesn't she want her chapter to survive?

You're an idiot. This young lady can be mature about it and stick up for her feelings. Why should she have to just shrug behind the scenes to be mature? This is the most shallow post I've ever read on GC.

Originally Posted by Tom Earp

If all of this is true, then being a Greek is shallow.

We had a member who was hanicapped and was one of the best members we had for getting things done. He was not worried about so neither were we. He was part of us so everybody took him as one thing only, a Brother of LXA at our chapter.

When ADPi was on our campus, they were called ADPigs. They were the first to recognize us as a local and several LX's married their members. We did a lot of things together when some of the sooty ones did not want to be around us. Sad to say, they are no longer on campus and would love to see them come back!

KD, came on campus and according to the Pixs had some very lovely girls. They lasted 2 years. Why, I do not know.

Go back to HS and see the beauties who are no longer or the wall flowers who are beauties now!

The person inside the skin form is much bigger a person than many and will give more for the love.

Hi, I am Barbi and I belong to ABC, we are neat, no, they are bimbos in many ways!

Wow. I actually agree with this post.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by kathykd2005

Although the OP was pretty vague about the situation, I needed to weigh in on the concept (no pun intended)--that people who are overweight cannot recruit. My chapter was extremely eclectic, with girls that wore a size 0 to girls that probably wore a size 26 or more. As others have said, size does not matter at all--personality is what counts. The best recruiters from my chapter were not those who looked the best, they were the women who showed who they really were, were involved on campus, and were women that others looked up to. Now, this could just be in my case (but I have a sneaking suspicion it's not), but the chapter I was in was the largest, most award winning sorority on campus. The idea that looks=quality is what makes GLOs look bad. It's a negative stereotype that we should work harder to dispel.

Exactly. That sounds about like mine...and we WERE the most award winning...I'm not sure that we still are. We would be second though. And we have girls from all walks of life. No chapter is perfect, but I can't imagine looking twice at one that valued looks that much...and, like I've said, me, personally...I'm not interested in PNMs like that either.

[kathykd2005]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

I'm not interested in PNMs like that either.

Agreed. I'm glad to hear so many opinions like this in this thread. I hope very much that those who believe or think otherwise look inside themselves and realize that this is a very superficial and unkind way to be.

[fantASTic]

That's a rough situation. Really, the chapter should not ask her to do that; as others have stated, they need her desperately on the floor, and it's not right. Sisters don't treat each other like that.

HOWEVER...

I am somewhat hesitant to believe that this is the whole story. Because it is told by the young woman herself, it's very possible this is NOT the real story. Often people who are insecure about one part of themselves [e.g. weight, appearance, intelligence/school, etc] blame all their problems on that one thing. It's very possible that last year at recruitment, she was detrimental to the chapter because of her personality or other reasons. However, I very much doubt that she would say, "They don't want me to come to recruitment because I am dull and PNM's can't talk to me."

I'm not saying she IS, of course, but it's a definate possibility that I'm not willing to overlook.

[BetteDavisEyes]

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna

I'll be brutal (yes, I'm overweight, but I'm old)...overweight young women need to realize that they could hurt the chapter as much as help it. This is not to say they cannot be important members with much to contribute. But as a wise national officer once said, in recruitment, first impressions are EVERYTHING. If this young lady can be mature about it, she can tell them that she understands, and offer to do something helpful behind the scenes during recruitment, or at least during the preparation week. Doesn't she want her chapter to survive?

Wow. I don't even know where to start with this. This is just so wrong on so many levels.

So just because a sister is overweight, she should have to hide herself from the PNM's? WTF??? I don't think so. Oh hell no. Perhaps YOU should be more mature and be understanding towards those members that are not thin & perfect.

Jeezuz. I'm going to stop here. This is just freaking ridiculous.

I agree with everything PM_Mama said.

[cuteASAbug]

Maybe this girl was asked not to show up to recruitment not because of her appearance but because of her personality? If a girl is overweight or not good with personal grooming, you can "suggest" some tips or give her a makeover all you want, but it's not going to make up for her personality. A sorority can control what its members wear during recruitment, however, it has no way of controlling the things that come out of its members' mouths.