Collegian/Alum Relations

[PandaBear]

I am working with our newly formed alum club, and we seem to be having some struggles with our collegiate chapter members. We are a diverse group (the alum club) and represent several different chapters. Our collegians don't seem to understand that we are here to support them (I guess they are afraid that we are trying to run things). I only know of one major problem we have had - several of our alums showed up for initiation and the collegians ruined it! They talked and laughed the whole time (yes...during the actual ritual!!!) We did express our concern for the preservation of ritual (quite vocally) but there was tension before this happened. I want our alum club to be successful, but I also know that we need cooperation on both ends. Anyone else had this problem? Any ideas? Thanks!

[BSUPhiSig'92]

I think it is normal for their to be tension between alumni and undergraduate members on occassion. I now that our alumni club from time to time has to play "bad guy" with the undergraduates. I think it is important though to have frequent interaction in a relaxed, social setting, apart from meetings, rituals, etc. Let the undergraduates get to know you as people, not just as the "alumni". I think this is typically the biggest problem in alumni-undergraduate relations; the alumni have a hard time relating to "today's" undergraduate members, and the undergraduates may not be used to having relationships with "grown-ups" who are not in position of authority over them (i.e. parents, teachers, etc..). I know for me, one of the most rewarding aspects of my involvement (as a chapter advisor and as president of our alum club) has been getting to know our undergraduate members, and for them feeling comfortable enough to seek my advice or come talk to me about problems that they might not be able to talk to someone else about!

[LXAAlum]

PhiSig,
Right on the money - the key is to establish rapport with the undergraduate members in an informal way to start, especially for a chapter that may have not seen alumni involvement for some time.

When I was a chapter advisor for a chapter about an hour from where I live, my first visit to the house was a trip - they claimed I was the first true "alumni" (not counting those just graduating the previous semester) to stop by the house in two years. I got to know them, went and saw Ritual (performed very well, actually), and then started the process of becoming their advisor and starting an Alumni Board. The chapter was extremely receptive, and, although there were fights over them wanting to do things explicitly illegal according to our Constitution, they knew my role was not to "run" the chapter, rather, to counsel them on all matters they voted or proposed. Our Chapter Advisor manual specifically stated to "allow mistakes to be made" - not big ones, obviously, but, this is where leadership is developed - learning your own lessons, but, at the same time, not having to reinvent the wheel.


------------------
Don't be your brother's keeper; rather, be your brother's Brother.

[SilverTurtle]

Being a recent alum, I think what has already been said is very accurate. In fact, my undergrad chapter asked me if I would be interested in being their alumni advisor for this past ('99-2000) year, and I chose to turn it down. Not because I wouldn't have loved being around them and 'guiding', but because I didn't want them to percieve me as trying to "run things my way". I told them why I was turning it down, and that in a few years (when I don't know so many members as well) if I'm in the area I would be honored if they kept me in mind. I also told them that even though I was turning down the position, I would always be available to help out, and all they have to do is call.

I have stayed pretty close to several members, and rapport can be everything. My last year I was the VP and 'New Member Educator' (aka Plegetrainer), so many of the members were comfortable coming to me with fraternity-related matters (good, bad, and ugly) already. And building even more of a friendship with them made them all the more comfortable doing so. And at the same time, it allowed them to make their own mistakes and learn from them. Or go through difficult situations and learn from those on their own, like they (and all of us) need to do sometimes.



------------------
SilverTurtle@greekchat.com
Phi Beta Fraternity
Phi chapter

[SoCalGirl]

I agree that ya'll need to re-establish a sisterhood with the undergrads. Have some Active-Alumnae activities. Basically anything that can serve as a sisterhood activity works for this.

I think you also need to be sure that you have a very good rapport with the officers and any other girls that happen to carry a lot of weight in the chapter. My own chapter had too many years of anti-alum sentiment because a couple of officers were always bitching about how they were getting in the way. But now we're getting better and our alum are getting better at thier positions too.

[BFulton]

If there's already tension, I agree that it takes time (and probably a few officer changeovers) for things to get better. From an alumni chapter side of things, I think we have to be careful (and this is a sensitive one) about the people we elect or appoint to work directly with the active chapter. Sometimes the people who might be great with organizing alumnae activities come across as harsh or negative when dealing with undergrads. (On the flip side, those who won't speak up when they see something going terribly wrong are also a problem.)

Fun social activities and professional networking (reaching out to help actives in the same career field, for example) have worked well in my experience. Those remove some of that fear about the alumni being around to "police the active chapter." We had a nice (though attendance was lower than hoped for, due to a mid-July cold rainstorm) family picnic - open to actives, alumnae and families of both last year that seems to helped.

[SilverTurtle]

BFulton- I think networking-type functions are an excellent idea! I think that emphasizes that the alumni are there to benefit the (undergrad) chapter, and at the same time diminishes the 'policing' atmosphere, as you said.



------------------
SilverTurtle@greekchat.com
Phi Beta Fraternity
Phi chapter

[BSUPhiSig'92]

One thing that was good for me when I became chapter advisor was the fact that I had a few years (four) under my belt and out of school before I took over. I think it was good that none of the brothers who were undergraduates when I was were still there. Sure, I had to start from scratch, but I think the whole dynamic would have been different, and possibly less effective. On a side note, I just visited the chapter house this weekend and met with our renovation contractor. The house will look AWESOME when it is done. I am so looking forward to homecoming!

[PenguinTrax]

As an alumnae chapter president that just helped my alumnae chapter struggle through reestablishing a good relationship with our collegians, I can offer some good advice (I hope!).

Elect or appoint a Collegiate Liason and ask the chapter to do elect or appoint an Alumnae Relations chairperson. Most fraternities have this position defined as part of either the executive or programming boards. Have these two members work together to open the lines of communication. Work with the collegian to schedule some activities with the alumnae chapter - I would say no more than one or two per semester. That way the alumnae and collegiate chapter still has plenty of time for their own events. Make sure to include the chapter on your mailings/announcements. Make them feel a part of your chapter and they will do the same.

Start doing little things for the chapter - the Alumnae Liaison can provide the alumnae with an event calendar. Send flowers or cookies to the chapter as 'good luck' gifts before a special event (dance competition, etc.). Plan annual events for graduating seniors, plan an annual fundraiser that actually does something nice for the college chapter. Make sure the chapter knows that you (the alumnae) want to be involved in their Founder's Day celebrations and would like to attend ritual. ASK the chapter what role they would like the alumnae to play and listen to them. Don't try and do too much too soon.

The advisors should be the only ones to chastise the chapter for not upholding proper decorum during ritual - it is their job to do so and the alumnae should have told the advisor of their displeasure and left it up to the advisor to handle the situation. The collegians probably do think that you want to run things..they are insecure as to your role. It is up to you to educate them on the role of the alumna - as a sister, as a strong supporter of the chapter and as a friend. Here are a few events that we hold annualy with our local collegiate chapter. In addition, we provide a full advisory board to the chapter (with their final vote of approval as per our bylaws). We have the Alumnae Liaison attend our planning events to schedule joint activities - one philanthropic and one social, each year. In addition, we celebrate Founder's day with them and the chapter hosts a Alumnae Appreciation dinner/Spring Initiation Banquet in the Spring.

Annual Events:
Pre-Rush Pool Party: held the Saturday before Rush begins. We provide lunch, desserts/snacks, a pool and music. It gives the chapter a break from Rush preparations and it shows our support for them.

Founder's Day: dinner and ritual at the chapter house

Goody Bag Fundraiser: At the beginning of each semester, we contact the parents of all members and offer to make a Finals Week Goody Bag for their daughters. We charge $15 and use the money as a donation to the ZTA Foundation. We deliver the bags to the chapter house the week before finals. The chapter knows we did the work for their parents and they LOVE it.

Senior Dinner: Held the last week before Finals, this event is for graduating seniors, advisors and the executive officers of the alumnae chapter. We have a wine & cheese hour followed by dinner. After dinner we perform our alumnae initiation service and present them with our graduation gifts. After dessert we usually sing or share stories of alumnae life.

Barbara


[This message has been edited by PnguinTrax (edited June 12, 2000).]

[stargirl]

When I was a pledge, I had an alumni pen pal. We wrote letters back and forth and then met for a dinner late in the semester. She was about ten years older than me, and she told me about how our chapter was back then. It was so fascinating that the traditions stayed while the fashions changed. She sent me some pictures of the late 1970's and early 1980's. They were a riot!

[DeltAlum]

I am Division Vice President for two local chapters.

Some great ideas above.

We have an interesting situation in that one of our local chapters was chartered in 1996, and so has no "older" alums.

That makes it a struggle to put together a house corporation or any other kind of alumni involvement.

The other problem is that the chapter didn't (still doesn't to some extent) really know how to relate to alumni. That is hard on the chapter AND their young alums.

During the last school year, they (the chapter) appointed an alumni liason who sent a couple of E-mails to alums each month. That was a great help, and much more timely (and easier and cheaper) than the typical newsletter.

Another thing I urged them to do (and they did it), was to invite alumni of other Delt chapters to initiation. They now have a formal dinner before the Ritual (which they do very well). After the first time, several of the older alumni were deeply moved. One said he hadn't seen the Ritual in over 40 years.

There are a lot of Delts in the area, including many older brothers from a huge chapter which has been closed for several years. Many of those men are eager to help.

Finally, we organized a local "Founder's Day" with both of our active local chapters and were surprized and pleased to have over 70 alumni from 23 chapters, as well as 30 undergraduates attend.

Being the father of a recent college graduate, I know that there are a million other things on their minds -- and they aren't always the most organized folks on the planet, but I'm convinced that you can't really be an outstanding chapter without strong alumni support.

Fraternally,
DeltAlum

[Tom Earp]

I have read with much interest all of the above and can agree with all of you. I was active the first years and then paled out. We ran in to problems and almost lost our charter and while I got back in for other reasons, to save the charter was the most important!! I got back in with BOTH FEET! I contacted a few of the K.C Area alums and we began to form some plans. In less than 9 mo., trying to find lost alums who the zeta has not been in touch with( Remember this) starting a core group for a new house it has involved into an Alum group in 2 main areas, a mentoring group to hold a retreat (1st) and contacting alums and zetas around the country to find ideas as each has thier own. We are all brothers bound by the lamp. As I am sure all Houses have found their Nationals non-reseptive at times it takes the Actives, Alums, and the Nationals to keep chapters on the local campuses!!!! While I am a firm beleiver if you as a young man can't go Lambda Chi Alpha , you should go Greek and this goes for Soroities as well. Give me some idaes of thins to suggest to my House!

------------------
Tom Earp LX Z#1
Pittsburg State U. (Kansas)