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  #1  
Old 02-02-2014, 05:48 PM
eliza54 eliza54 is offline
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Can a Fraternity give a bid out after bid night?

Hello, I recently rushed and Saturday was my bid night. I didn't get into my first choice fraternity (I knew the rush chair and he said I would be a good fit for my first pick, but he thought I would be a better fit for another one, so I could get out of my shell) and now I'm thinking about dropping out of the pledge ship. Is it possible for another fraternity (my first choice) to give me a bid if I drop out of pledge ship of another one? I could also rush next fall, but then I wouldn't be able to live in the house.

Reasons for dropping: I really didn’t know what I was doing. I also built my first choice up a lot and to have it taken from me, where almost all my current friends and teammates are, is devastating to me. I don’t feel like I can give my current choice my full effort since I’m so invested in my first choice still. I only knew a handful of guys in my second choice and upon meeting the house, I was not as impressed as I want to be. They are all pretty much like me, but I want to change. I have hung out with the same type of people for my whole life I am getting tired of it, honestly. I want new.
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  #2  
Old 02-02-2014, 07:00 PM
Kevin Kevin is offline
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Depends on your school and the individual chapters involved. If the first choice house hit their requirement goals and is going on with their new member training, they probably wouldn't be able to accommodate you entering in the middle of the process.

If your first choice didn't give you a bid in the first place, why do you think they'll give you one now? If the rush chair said you'd be a better fit elsewhere, that's a clue that first-pick just isn't that into you.

My advice is to stick it out with your current group.

--and never, ever say that someone that you're "devastated" because you have friends and acquaintances in a different fraternity. Very drama-queeny.
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  #3  
Old 02-02-2014, 07:00 PM
Kevin Kevin is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza54 View Post
Hello, I recently rushed and Saturday was my bid night. I didn't get into my first choice fraternity (I knew the rush chair and he said I would be a good fit for my first pick, but he thought I would be a better fit for another one, so I could get out of my shell) and now I'm thinking about dropping out of the pledge ship. Is it possible for another fraternity (my first choice) to give me a bid if I drop out of pledge ship of another one? I could also rush next fall, but then I wouldn't be able to live in the house.

Reasons for dropping: I really didn’t know what I was doing. I also built my first choice up a lot and to have it taken from me, where almost all my current friends and teammates are, is devastating to me. I don’t feel like I can give my current choice my full effort since I’m so invested in my first choice still. I only knew a handful of guys in my second choice and upon meeting the house, I was not as impressed as I want to be. They are all pretty much like me, but I want to change. I have hung out with the same type of people for my whole life I am getting tired of it, honestly. I want new.
qfp
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  #4  
Old 02-02-2014, 07:37 PM
thetalady thetalady is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza54 View Post
Hello, I recently rushed and Saturday was my bid night. I didn't get into my first choice fraternity (I knew the rush chair and he said I would be a good fit for my first pick, but he thought I would be a better fit for another one, so I could get out of my shell) and now I'm thinking about dropping out of the pledge ship. Is it possible for another fraternity (my first choice) to give me a bid if I drop out of pledge ship of another one? I could also rush next fall, but then I wouldn't be able to live in the house.

Reasons for dropping: I really didn’t know what I was doing. I also built my first choice up a lot and to have it taken from me, where almost all my current friends and teammates are, is devastating to me. I don’t feel like I can give my current choice my full effort since I’m so invested in my first choice still. I only knew a handful of guys in my second choice and upon meeting the house, I was not as impressed as I want to be. They are all pretty much like me, but I want to change. I have hung out with the same type of people for my whole life I am getting tired of it, honestly. I want new.
Am I understanding correctly....you accepted a bid yesterday and today you want to depledge because you are not impressed? Please tell me that this is not the correct timeline....
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  #5  
Old 02-02-2014, 07:54 PM
tld221 tld221 is offline
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Originally Posted by thetalady View Post
Am I understanding correctly....you accepted a bid yesterday and today you want to depledge because you are not impressed? Please tell me that this is not the correct timeline....
If he's not impressed with these guys, and theyre a lot like him, then he's not all that jazzed about himself.

Sounds like he's looking for the fraternity to make him.
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  #6  
Old 02-02-2014, 08:45 PM
MysticCat MysticCat is offline
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Originally Posted by Kevin View Post
--and never, ever say that someone that you're "devastated" because you have friends and acquaintances in a different fraternity. Very drama-queeny.
Seriously.

And Eliza?
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  #7  
Old 02-02-2014, 09:31 PM
DGTess DGTess is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza54 View Post
Hello, I recently rushed and Saturday was my bid night. I didn't get into my first choice fraternity (I knew the rush chair and he said I would be a good fit for my first pick, but he thought I would be a better fit for another one, so I could get out of my shell) and now I'm thinking about dropping out of the pledge ship. Is it possible for another fraternity (my first choice) to give me a bid if I drop out of pledge ship of another one? I could also rush next fall, but then I wouldn't be able to live in the house.

Reasons for dropping: I really didn’t know what I was doing. I also built my first choice up a lot and to have it taken from me, where almost all my current friends and teammates are, is devastating to me. I don’t feel like I can give my current choice my full effort since I’m so invested in my first choice still. I only knew a handful of guys in my second choice and upon meeting the house, I was not as impressed as I want to be. They are all pretty much like me, but I want to change. I have hung out with the same type of people for my whole life I am getting tired of it, honestly. I want new.

"...rush chair and he said I would be a good fit for my first pick, but he thought I would be a better fit for another one..." is probably your answer. Think about it very carefully before you try to drop.
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  #8  
Old 02-02-2014, 09:47 PM
Kevin Kevin is offline
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I'll say it again, if the rush chair tells you you're a better fit elsewhere, keep in mind that this is the guy whose only job is to get as many of the right kind of recruit for their chapter as possible. If he isn't chasing you down to extend a bid, it's just not happening for you.
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  #9  
Old 02-02-2014, 10:32 PM
ElieM ElieM is offline
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He's just not that into you
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  #10  
Old 02-02-2014, 11:20 PM
DubaiSis DubaiSis is offline
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One of the big problems in sorority rush is that the girls are so well trained to be both enthusiastic and courteous that rushees think 1-the feelings of adoration are mutual and 2-there must be some huge clusterf*&k in the world that caused the error that just happened on my invitation list. Dude. The same thing happened to you, except that the rush chair was WAY less subtle than the sorority women would be. You'd be a fit here but you'd be a great fit THERE? Seriously, you can't read between that line?

Take the gift you got (a bid to a join a fraternity that does appreciate your greatness) and get over yourself about greener pastures.
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  #11  
Old 02-03-2014, 10:40 AM
ree-Xi ree-Xi is offline
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Originally Posted by MysticCat View Post
Seriously.

And Eliza?
I presumed it was "Eli," and "za" for "Arizona".
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  #12  
Old 02-03-2014, 10:59 AM
LaneSig LaneSig is offline
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To answer the thread question: Yes, a fraternity can give out a bid after bid night. But, if they didn't give you a bid on bid night, why do you think they'd give you one after bid night?
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  #13  
Old 02-03-2014, 06:04 PM
pinksequins pinksequins is offline
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The abbreviation for Arizona is AZ, not "za".
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