DePauw: Housing Found for Students Displaced by Sorority Membership Review - Page 6

#76 02-25-2007, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DZRose

I hope you don't assume that just because you had one chapter consultant that told you that, that you believe that actually reflects what the active members and alumnae everywhere think. To make a blanket statement that just because you aren't a size 2 this situation at DePauw means DZ doesn't want you is going a bit far. I don't care what you weigh. My concern would be how you represent the sorority. I think if you asked any alumna, they would tell you the same thing. And any active member worth their salt would agree.

As for image becoming a big thing for DZ HQ. I really believe it depends on the campus you are on. The image of a DZ at LSU would vary greatly from the image of a DZ at University of Washington, or UConn.

How ironic that you say that to KatieKate1244, you know...considering DZ HQ just closed her chapter and all.

DZRose · #77 02-25-2007, 10:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

Obviously not every alumna nor active think the same thing that you just stated.

I'm sorry, it was wrong. I do think they should cut their losses now, issue an apology to girls that they essentially told weren't good enough, and learn. That chapter didn't make numbers...at ALL...after the incident. Obviously some people are considering what happened. And well they should. What's to keep it from happening again?

Sometimes chapters are closed for low numbers, or hazing. Sometimes chapters are reorganized because many of their members are not behaving like their organization requires them to, or are not making grades. Not because the girls aren't cute enough and are therefore percieved to be unimpressive in recruitment.

There are always going to be women who base worthiness on physical appearance, regardless of the organization they belong to. And again, I don't believe that the only reasons for what happened at DePauw is due to what they looked like. I'm not saying that has nothing to do with it, but there are other factors that played into this whole thing.

Maybe they should just close the chapter. Maybe that would be the easy way out. Do you know for a fact that they haven't apologized to the women? I guarantee you that there are numerous members, both active and alumna who have. Would it mean more coming from the few women they perceive as responsible for their not being DZ's anymore to say "sorry" or from the bulk of the sisterhood, expressing how they disagreed with actions taken by HQ?

I don't have the answers. I don't know what really would be best for everyone involved. What about the women who chose to stay and try to rebuild? Would that be fair to them? Or are we all to villify them for not refusing to participate as well?

DZRose · #78 02-25-2007, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OTW

How ironic that you say that to KatieKate1244, you know...considering DZ HQ just closed her chapter and all.

I don't believe that she is a member of a chapter that is closed.

KatieKate1244 · #79 02-25-2007, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by texas*princess

Did this woman seriously think the other non-Greek women on campus were saying "Like, ohmygawd.. I totally don't want to be a ABC because those girls don't tan or get their nails done"

I honestly think she did. Never mind the fact that half my chapter could hardly afford to pay the $30 a month dues, much less superficial stuff like tanning. She was just really out of touch.

Looking back, what I said was slightly over dramatic, however, I think this whole situation can only re-enforce the "MTV-skinny-ditz" perceptions many PNMs have of sorority women.

DeltaBetaBaby · #80 02-25-2007, 10:09 PM

I just don't agree that the feelings of 23 women are more important than what is best for the organization as a whole. It is the nature of any organization that members' feelings will be hurt at times. Let's say a member's best friend comes through rush, and is a terrible fit for your chapter. Do you pledge her? Not likely. So you are going to hurt a member's feelings. But you do it, because it is better for your chapter.

For those of you who tell me that you care about grooming, not appearances, please explain to me how picking good clothing and showering is any different from maintaining a healthy weight.

And finally, If you are taking the NYT article as the gospel truth, you need to think criticall about what its motives are, and why the media just might sensationalize a story like this one.

I am not trying to say that DZ HQ did everything right in this situation, I am just saying that the level of indignance is astonishing from people who have no firsthand involvement with the situation.

DZRose · #81 02-25-2007, 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KatieKate1244

I honestly think she did. Never mind the fact that half my chapter could hardly afford to pay the $30 a month dues, much less superficial stuff like tanning. She was just really out of touch.

Looking back, what I said was slightly over dramatic, however, I think this whole situation can only re-enforce the "MTV-skinny-ditz" perceptions many PNMs have of sorority women.

I agree with you. Even now, when I tell people that I am actively involved as an alumna with my Sorority I get the response "really? you were in a sorority?" because when they think of a sorority girl, I am not the image that comes to mind. Obviously this whole thing doesn't help.

LOVEinZTA · #82 02-25-2007, 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DZRose

Would it mean more coming from the few women they perceive as responsible for their not being DZ's anymore to say "sorry" or from the bulk of the sisterhood, expressing how they disagreed with actions taken by HQ?

YES, it DOES mean more coming from HQ. If there's a big company and a few people higher up in the company do something that hurts you, it doesn't matter how many of the secretaries and mailroom workers apologize for what happened. You want to hear it from the person that did it to you.

DZRose · #83 02-25-2007, 10:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LOVEinZTA

YES, it DOES mean more coming from HQ. If there's a big company and a few people higher up in the company do something that hurts you, it doesn't matter how many of the secretaries and mailroom workers apologize for what happened. You want to hear it from the person that did it to you.

Do we know for certain that they haven't received an apology in any form?

#84 02-25-2007, 10:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DZRose

I don't believe that she is a member of a chapter that is closed.

Really? Because I was led to believe otherwise.

LOVEinZTA · #85 02-25-2007, 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DZRose

Do we know for certain that they haven't received an apology in any form?

I don't know that, I was was just disputing the claim that it's okay for them not to apologize at all. If they have, good. If not, they sure better.

DZRose · #86 02-25-2007, 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OTW

Really? Because I was led to believe otherwise.

Okay, so it's closed (my bad, I'm new on here and didn't know how to check). In this case I am familiar with the WVU Tech chapter and I could say with a fair amount of certainty that it was not because of what the women looked like in any way. Knowing the campus, the consultant that said that was not really aware of what would actually fly there. I couldn't even imagine a group of women I'd be more proud to call Delta Zeta's. I was saddned to hear the chapter closed.

KatieKate1244 · #87 02-25-2007, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DZRose

I don't believe that she is a member of a chapter that is closed.

My chapter is closed. AFAIK, it hasn't been taken off the official website, though.

UGAalum94 · #88 02-25-2007, 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

For those of you who tell me that you care about grooming, not appearances, please explain to me how picking good clothing and showering is any different from maintaining a healthy weight.

Healthy weight and sorority girl good image weight may not be the same thing. And although I was plenty thin enough when I was in college, maintaining a healthy weight is much more difficult than grooming and picking out clothes, for what it's worth, especially for some people.

Although I agree with your comments about sensationalized stories and the media, to defend using physical image as the primary rightful concern of a GLO in evaluating members seems icky.

They had a chapter. Now they don't (or it's going to be really hard to); in addition they've allowed events to occur that make it appear that they value superficial appearance more than the ideals of their group. Poorly played.

33girl · #89 02-25-2007, 10:39 PM

HOLY CRAP THIS MADE THE NY TIMES.

To the former national president who told me my chapter had pledged too many "undesirable" sisters - yes, that is the exact wording that was used to me about people who are as close to me as my own blood family - aren't YOU glad there wasn't as much Internet in 1998???

YES, I WENT THERE.

DZRose: Keep on drinking that Kool-Aid.

Kate Holloway, please come to Pittsburgh so I can buy you 328473294792387493274923874 drinks because you are TEH BOMB.

DeltaBetaBaby · #90 02-25-2007, 10:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alphagamuga

Although I agree with your comments about sensationalized stories and the media, to defend using physical image as the primary rightful concern of a GLO in evaluating members seems icky.

I agree, it is. BUT...what do we tell every single PNM who comes onto GC and asks why some chapter didn't want her?

Membership Selection is a private matter. Nobody knows why someone is/is not offered a bid.

In my mind, this is analogous to that. The NYT was not in the room with the decision-makers. Neither were any of the women in the chapter. Neither were any of the posters on this thread. We can speculate all we want, but only the HQ representatives who made the final decision can say why one girl was selected and another was not.