Will i be rejected from sororities because i'm fat?

SunshinePurple · #1 09-02-2011, 07:55 PM

I'm not trying to be controversial or anything. I'm from England and i got a scholarship at a university in America (i've been here 2 weeks) so i don't really know how sororities work. I did a bit of googling and from what i've read, sororities don't accept fat people because they don't want to be known as the "fat sorority". Obviously this wouldn't be true for some sororities, i know that; i'm just going off of what i've read/heard. I originally wanted to try and join one to meet new people but now i'm nervous they will take one look at me and make up their minds - i couldn't stand that kind of humiliation. So what i am asking if for HONEST opinions, will i be rejected from a sorority because i'm fat? Are most of the girls in a sorority skinny? Will i be judged?

katydidKD · #2 09-02-2011, 07:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SunshinePurple

I'm not trying to be controversial or anything. I'm from England and i got a scholarship at a university in America (i've been here 2 weeks) so i don't really know how sororities work. I did a bit of googling and from what i've read, sororities don't accept fat people because they don't want to be known as the "fat sorority". Obviously this wouldn't be true for some sororities, i know that; i'm just going off of what i've read/heard. I originally wanted to try and join one to meet new people but now i'm nervous they will take one look at me and make up their minds - i couldn't stand that kind of humiliation. So what i am asking if for HONEST opinions, will i be rejected from a sorority because i'm fat? Are most of the girls in a sorority skinny? Will i be judged?

qfp

SunshinePurple · #3 09-02-2011, 08:01 PM

What does qfp mean?

honeychile · #4 09-02-2011, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SunshinePurple

What does qfp mean?

Quote For Posterity.

Sunshine, you won't get a serious answer, as it's part of Membership Selection, which is private.

KSUViolet06 · #5 09-02-2011, 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SunshinePurple

I'm not trying to be controversial or anything. I'm from England and i got a scholarship at a university in America (i've been here 2 weeks) so i don't really know how sororities work. I did a bit of googling and from what i've read, sororities don't accept fat people because they don't want to be known as the "fat sorority". Obviously this wouldn't be true for some sororities, i know that; i'm just going off of what i've read/heard. I originally wanted to try and join one to meet new people but now i'm nervous they will take one look at me and make up their minds - i couldn't stand that kind of humiliation. So what i am asking if for HONEST opinions, will i be rejected from a sorority because i'm fat? Are most of the girls in a sorority skinny? Will i be judged?

This is one of those things where you just have to do it and see what happens. If you don't try, you definitely won't get a bid.

I will say this though: Think about it. it's statistcally impossible for every woman in a school's entire Greek system to be a stick skinny girl. So the "all the girls in sororities are skinny" thing is a myth.

Another thing to note: if you aren't confident in yourself and don't present yourself well because you're worried about your weight, that can hurt you more than anything.

SunshinePurple · #6 09-02-2011, 08:15 PM

I am usually very confident, but obviously being in a different country does make me feel more concious than i normally would, i guess it's the culture shock or pressure to make friends. I would say i have a good personality and i make friends easily but now i have read all of this stuff it makes me feel nervous to bid. Also my roomate tried to discourage me to bid which makes me feel like the subtly saying - you won't fit in. Just wanted some advice so thanks for replying.

SigKapSweetie · #7 09-02-2011, 08:26 PM

It is more of an issue at some schools than at others, but like KSUViolet said, if you don't try, you can't succeed. The best advice I can give you is to act like yourself, dress appropriately and in a way that flatters your figure, wear makeup that highlights your best features, and try to be friendly and make a connection with everyone you meet during recruitment. All of that is, coincidentally, the same advice I would give any PNM no matter what her weight.

KDCat · #8 09-02-2011, 08:39 PM

Thin and pretty is helpful, but personality is more important than looks.

I think every group I've ever known has had some plumper sisters.

I'm more familiar with smaller NPC systems, though.

Phigirl04 · #9 09-02-2011, 09:07 PM

If you're already on campus, look around you. I'm just guessing here but I bet you will find that not every young woman wearing letters is stick thin. I know within my own chapter we had girls in a range of sizes and that they all felt comfortable being themselves in our chapter. I know this is only my experience and at some of the more competitive schools, it may be different but the best way to put your mind at ease is probably to take a look at the current sorority women and just see.

I totally agree with the other advice in this thread. You'll never know if it would have happened if you don't try. And at the very least, going through recruitment will give you the opportunity to meet a ton of new people and make some great friends.

I'd say go for it. Otherwise, you may just end up spending a lot of useless time wondering what would of or could have happened.

SWTXBelle · #10 09-02-2011, 10:01 PM

GO LOOK AT THE BID DAY PICTURES. All shapes, all sizes, all colours, all sorts of intelligent young women!

aephi alum · #11 09-02-2011, 11:14 PM

<sarcasm>Yes, you will be judged on how much you weigh. At some point during recruitment, you will feel a pinch - that's a sister sneaking up on you with calipers to measure your body fat. You may also be offered a shoulder massage - this is just an excuse to read the size tag on your shirt or dress. And if you do pledge, you will have to strip down to your underwear in front of all the sisters, and they will circle your fat and tell you what exercises you need to do to trim down.</sarcasm>

Honestly, simply being overweight won't necessarily get you cut. If you show up overweight in a dress that's 4 sizes too small for you, that could be a problem. But if you are overweight and wear outfits that fit you properly, and go into recruitment confident in your own self, your weight won't hinder you as much as you fear.

DubaiSis · #12 09-03-2011, 01:26 AM

My bigger concern is your student status. Are you at this college for a year or for your college career? If this is a very competitive school they may not want to "waste" a bid on someone who will only be with them for a year. If you are planning on being there for 4 years or so, definitely make sure to share that. Then your "exotic" status of being British will add some interest and make you memorable.

We all know that while the world is getting fatter, psychological issues with fat have either stayed the same or gotten worse. I definitely feel your pain. Do your best to look as good as you can, and that's all you can do. You can at least rest assured that the girls will be nice to you, even if they end up cutting you for such a shallow reason.

And stop reading those greek gossip sites! They help no one and just make you worried about reputations. Oh, and that fat house? They have lovely girls too, and equally as good sisterhoods.

SunshinePurple · #13 09-03-2011, 12:27 PM

Thanks everyone, you've given me some great advice and i'm sorry if i came across judgemental of the Greek system.

DubaiSis · #14 09-03-2011, 02:08 PM

Not judgemental, just victim to some stereotyping. But admittedly there are campuses where a look at bid day pictures would strike terror into most girls who have anything less than stellar body confidence.

FleurGirl · #15 09-04-2011, 04:04 PM

1) If sororities rejected people on the basis of "fatness", there would be no overweight sorority women. Look around; they exist.
2) If a chapter is going to drop you based on your size alone, is that really a sisterhood you would want to be a part of?

This is one of my biggest pet peeves when people who aren't Greek talk about sororities, because it just isn't true. Even in the "prettiest" chapters at the schools with the "top" Greek system, there ARE women who aren't supermodels. There's a lot more to being Greek than wearing a size 2. A LOT more.