Dissafiliation

[MSSTCY1]

Have any of you disafilitated from your organizations? If so, why?

If you have not disafiliated, under what grounds do you think one is justified for disafiliating?

If you have disafiliated someone... why? What grounds was it justified under?

Yes, I am full of questions tonight... I hope some of you have answers

[Kevin]

It's a pain to forcibly dissafilliate someone in my organization. We'll just leave it at that. Thus far in my chapter no one has ever disaffiliated.

[MoxieGrrl]

I have not disaffiliated, but I feel the grounds for doing so are pretty much...if the person doesn't want to be a part of the organization anymore or blatently violated the rules, especially risk management ones.

My chapter disaffliated girls for smoking marijuana in the house a few years back.

[AlphaSigLana]

I have disaffiliated due mainly to finances, but also due to a lack or response from Nationals. I still believe in what my chapter stood for, but I didn't feel that I wanted to go on status because I didn't care for Nationals new rules and the way my chapter has changed for the worse. they are so anti-hazing and the new girls were very disrespectful. I felt that as a junior and being on exec that I would get somerespect because when I joined the house(WE WERE NOT HAZED) my pledge class respected the upperclassmen very much, and though it wasn't forced it was understood that the upperclassmen got to sit on the couches and they would get to go in line first for food etc. I always thought that was fair.I don't expect them to bow down to me, but they should still respect sisters thathave been in the house longer; just like we should respect alum! BUt now that is considered hazing by nationals and thus we have new girls w/o morals etc in our house. I was embarressed to be a memberof my chapter due to certain members. I decided that I could bitch as much as I want, but thatwasn't going to do anything so the best thing for me to do was get out.

[josh8o]

i am the ifc rush director, so i had to dissafiliate for the start of rush. it wasn't too big of a deal, but its hard to not say what house you are from when people ask.
i also had to dissafiliate for greek week this year because i am on the exec board....this was a little different because i really didnt do a good job at it. i cheered for everyone, but you could always find me with my house cheering for them. my brothers are still giving me a bad time for getting yelled at by the rest of the exec board to dissafiliate when i was doing our house chant at greek games...

[FuzzieAlum]

Usually when someone says "disaffiliate" I think of what Josh is talking about - temporarily not being publicly associated with your organization, usually for a greater Greek cause (rush, IFC, Panhel).

But it sounds like you mean the permanent severing of the individual from the organization. I think the reasons for a person choosing to do it themselves are very different from the reasons an organization would do it to a member.

If a member is being kicked out, it is usually for egregious violations of chapter standards or because the member is in serious financial arrears. It can also happen for very poor academic performance - although generally this would be after a period of probation.

If a sister or brother chooses to voluntarily quit the organization, it is very rarely for financial reasons, but more frequently because the member has serious issues with how the chapter or organization is being run, or because she no longer believes in the value of the organization.

[Tom Earp]

Dissafiliation is a fancy word or sounds like one!

It would depend on whether an associate is kicked out or as a new member not voted to become a full fledged member.

I also mean that when a member becomes so disinchanted with the Chapter, because of finances or that they have become real jerk offs is a different matter!

Many times, a member quits the chapter because they cannot afford it, especially in todays economics or the Chapter has lost the feeling of why and what they are there for.

The Individual may have the True Love for the International, but the ergonomics of the local chapter have lost the feeling of what they are trying to do! I think they call that cliques or whom is the top dog, or the head cheese!

Many times I thought about telling my Active Chapter to pound sand and associate with a local Chapter, but, I still love my many local Brothers through thick and thin!

Remeber, I am the Founder of the Chapter so it do mean a wholelot to me!!!

[pinkyphimu]

i have some friends who disaffiliated from their organizations. some were for finances. one daed bc she was unhappy with the organization. i think it really is a personal decision. maybe you realize that you don't have the time to put into it or maybe you realize you made a mistake.

i was not personally involved, but i do know of someone who was disaffiliated by the chapter and national. she had basically taken lots of money from the treasury. when she graduated in dec and the new treasurer found several strange things...lol. after attempts to reclaim the money, she was daed from the group.

[astroAPhi]

I'll admit, through 2002 I gave serious thought to disaffiliating and almost turned in my badge.

Why? I felt that the girls in the chapter no longer lived up to the standards of the organization. We had an extremely negative President, and her attitude pervaded meetings and the entire organization. What I didn't realize was that most of my sisters were frustrated as well. I still believed in Alpha Phi, and loved it's ideals, but I couldn't bear to watch the chapter go downhill. Sisters only talked to me to nag me about mandatory this and mandatory that.

I confided in a few sisters who I felt still knew what it meant to be an Alpha Phi and they urged me to speak up. We had a chapter forum and I was randomly selected to brainstorm about "participation and morale". I told everyone how I felt and surprisingly, I got a lot of positive reaction. Sisters who I would have never expected to apologized to me for treating me so poorly.

Our President finished out her term, and I was appointed to Chaplain, where I felt I could best help current members and inspire New Members to follow the ideals of Alpha Phi.

Before you do anything like quit, please talk to your chapter. If you have to, get up in a meeting and say "This is how I feel... please help me change it". I am so glad I stayed with Alpha Phi because the problem was only temporary. Hopefully yours will be too.

[MSSTCY1]

I was just wondering

Some sisters are being put on "trial" for basially personal actions that had no effect what-so-ever on the sorority. The actions were not against anything in the by-laws nor any sorority ideal, yet everyone is against them. Its very disgusting, its happened before for no reason other than personal gain of the person making the accusation. Honestly, I don't know if I want to be part of an organization that targets certain people in order to make themselves look better. Looking at the people in question right now, it seems like no one is safe. Its just a horrible thing because if these girls are disafiliated then there are others who will go with them and I am worried that this could be the end of the sorority. We are low on numbers as is.

[KDShannon]

MSSTCY,

That is the way it works sometimes.. we have standards and things that we expect of our members... because regardless of if it is just affecting that person individually.. you always wear an invisible jersey and therefore it affects the chapters/nationals reputations.

Being that I am the VP Standards from my sorority and chapter.. I have to deal with situations similar to this quite frequently..it is not fun.. but like I said.. there are certain standards that we expect you to live by.

Does that make sense?

[MSSTCY1]

Of course it makes sence.

The more I re-read all of these posts though, I can't help but notice how un-orthadox my organization is.

There would be very few members - read less than 5 if we followed the same paths which many of you take.

I am not saying that this is right at all. In fact, it has been quite an eye-opener and to me, places a higher emphasis on the qualities which each girl should be displaying.

We do not have anyone in charge of making sure that the standards of the sorority are being met and kept. Basically, we just have people throwing accusations back and forth. However, after reading your post KDShannon, I am bringing up the issue at our next meeting. I think that adding that posistion would save reputations and friendships before even the thought of them begins to turn sour.

Thanks Everyone. You have really helped a lot.

[White_Chocolate]

in order to disaffliate, there is a process

you either personally disaffliate yourself
you're put on an action plan and given 2 chances to correct the situation
you threaten, harm, do drugs, or steal