Dating Greek Men

[breathesgelatin]

I have only dated Greek men. Unless I found someone spectacular, I would definately not date a non-Greek. This may be because at my school 85% of men are Greek and if they are not there tends to be a.... reason. Either they:

a) act really, really, really sketchy when drunk
b) sort of hole themselves up in their rooms all the time
c) are just not interested, which usually means they're not interested in the same things I am

Outside of my college or after college I would certainly be open to a non-Greek. But I think me and my current dude might just go the distance, anyway!

[James]

I don't date men.

[AGDPrincess70]

Originally posted by James
I don't date men.

that's good to hear

[AlphaGamDiva]

during college, i've only seriously dated two guys, but gone out with plenty....some are fraternity men, some are not. it just depends on the character of the person, really.....not that i chose the best character, but hey. my first b/f at college was given the ol' black ball from sig ep.....yes, i dated such a respectable human being to be BLACK BALLED. dated a few other random fraternity guys/non-greeks here and there...all fun, no drama.....and the last guy i seriously dated was a highly respected member of what? sig ep! so...interesting turn for me.

as far as dating a greek vs a non-greek....i don't think it matters as long as the other person realizes that my sorority is very important to me, and he can't expect me to choose him over my girls everytime. i take a lot of pride in my chapter and i love everything that alpha gam stands for.......and i need for whoever i'm with to understand that and respect that. if he's involved in his fraternity, he prob won't have any issues with that.....if he's not, then i'm sure there's something else he's involved with that he takes just as seriously as i take my letters (hopefully, anyway). i've done the dating-the-boy-who-talks-down-about-my-sorority-thing.....and i will never, ever, ever do it again. you don't respect my sisters, you don't respect me. period.

james...you don't? and i had the perfect man just ready for you!!!!

[luvtoscrap]

Here is my penny's worth of thoughts:

The positive side:

The guy learns time mangement skills, leadership skills, and organizational skills that will translate to skills are useful in the adult world and his future care.

The negative aspects:

Any time any group of guys get together they are going to act imature. It is like the male bonding thing. They are with thier buds. Even those that graduate college continue with this silly ritual-it's called the golf leagues and that occassionaly emergency reason he has to go see his bud (along with five other closest buds on a Sat night). Oh don't get me wrong-they are crazy about you-if they weren't they would not have married you. You don't mad-you just laugh because this is how G-d has created them. It happens to non-Greeks too. I think it is hormonal.

The super positive part:
For some they continue this immature male bonding ritual until their mid-thirties then they start beginning very involved with the family. It is really cool. They start doing really nice things like making sure they put the toliet seat down because they really care. Making sure all the cars have a full tank of gas in the morning. They become super responsible at home. All those great organizational skills they learned in the frat translates to both work and home. Oh it is wonderful. And the best part-they don't outgrow this phase.

[PiPhiGirl2005]

The only guy I dated seriously in college (and am still dating) is a member of Sigma Chi, and I wouldn't have it any other way. The fraternity has caused him to grow and mature so much during our college years, and it has been so great to watch his journey. It's not just him, either: the Sigma Chis at my school are just great guys.

Sure, we both had really busy schedules, but we love it that way. There were many semesters when we were both holding high-profile EC offices, but it's really nice to date someone who has the same commitment to an organization as you do. Our weekends were consumed by formals, date parties, and philanthropy events, but again, we liked it that way.

And I never thought of his time with his brothers as immature male bonding - we're in college to have a good time, and I completely supported him doing goofy stuff with his brothers. I'm glad he grew so close to all of them and made such interesting memories with them. I will always think fondly of him and all of his brothers.

[luvtoscrap]

smiles....PhiGirl2005

Honestly this is just an insight and nothing more- after having 4 children, 30 plus years of marriage, having three children that are grown (one is still at home-he was a major opps), two which have their own families, experienced both the ups and downs of life-my husband and I do not take life so seriously. He was committed to his frat in college-and still is on a different level. In college he did philantrophy events, held office, and had formals. They also did goofy and fun stuff like had panty and bra raids on different sorority houses. This was also the era of intense hazing and drunken parties which were held at the fraternity house. Today we consider this a risk management nightmare-then a normal part of Greek life. In fact I was hazed as a pledge. It was a different era.

However both my husband look back at our life and we think we were all mature at the age of 30...now we laugh at concept. Heck we don't know what life was until after the age of forty. Yes I do tease him about the immature guy stuff and he teases me about some of things I do-my cooking club, my buying a channel purse last year and my scrapbooking hobby. However, through everything we have experienced during the last 40 years it has been out committment to each other that has helped us through the bad times and made the good times even better. That is not to say keeping that relationship strong did not take a lot of work and a loads of communication on both of our parts.

[Tom Earp]

God, what an old Broad!

What GLOs do besides being somewhat stupid is give Young people a sense of being, directing, participating and learning.

Remember, Greeks concentrate on many things,:

GPA to stay Active.
Participation in Charity Events.
Be and Officer.
Learn to lead.
Be a Member for Life and try to stay active when can.

Damn, I have been doing it for 40 Years.

If I did not do this, I would not be on this Site, know so many of My Local Brothers and Brothers from all over The Country and Others.

Oh, what is a Channel Purse? Did You catch it fishing with a Family Outing?

Oh, by the way, Welcome to GC!

There is life after 40, Hell try 63!

The Golden Years Suck, that is why I am still envolved, the Kids make Me feel young even though I Catch ten tons of S*it from them, it because they care for me!!! I Hope!

[luvtoscrap]

Tom,

Thanks for the warm welcome to GC. At least I am not the most senile of the bunch

Et toi on that Channel purse. The real joke is that I purchased it "slightly used" on ebay. The only "used" part was a small mark on the inside with a steal of a final price. Anyhow I wore it to a charity event last year. Hubby still as a joke hassles me that he was expected to donate more at that event only because I wore that purse then if the purse cost new. Yeah give me a break....just an excuse to give me a hassle.

[Susan_Renee]

I have dated greek men before and after becoming greek. I didn't find the experiences all that different. I didn't enjoy any of those relationships. I'm definitely not saying all greek men are immature and bad to date. I'm sure they arent. I know many many wonderful men in the greek system. They just tend to always be the ones I'm only friends with. I think I just need to work on picking better guys.

[Beta version]

I've used Greek dating services like that. I must it's an interesting thread lol.. I've been out with a Greek girl, but unfortunantly it never worked out

[PhoenixAzul]

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 4 years now. During my pledge period, he was so afraid they were going to force me to have sex with frat boys and drink and smoke and whatever. When he finally met the lunatics I call sisters, I think he finally understood why I took it all so seriously. He finally got over the fact that I wasn't being forced to give up what I believed in to join.

On the other hand, I think that he wishes he had joined one, just because he sees the fun I have, and the fun I have with the fraternity guys at Otterbein. I'm always hanging out with a couple of guys here, and I think he feels left out because he graduated from a school that didn't have greek life and he lives out of state from me. Meh. I always joke that he is a member of Rho Alpha Tau (PAT) because that is his first name. Lame, I know.

[dznat187]

I love dating a greek. He is the only one I have ever dated and we are engaged. It is great because he just gets it. I met him at UIFI so I know he understands my feelings about greek life, incvluding hazing etc. I really don't think i would be abel to date any of the greek men from my undergrad campus just because i couldnt liev with the things they do. i know we would fight all teh time if his chapter hazed their new members or if their grades kept going down. That would enver work out. Luckily, my fiance and I see eye to eye on all those issues and he is just as adament about them as I am, if ot more at times.
I love it!!! and I love him!

[cashmoney]

Originally posted by dznat187
I love dating a greek. He is the only one I have ever dated and we are engaged.

I feel sorry for you. Thats kind of like dating and then marrying the person you lost your virginity to.