Things you want to say (but shouldn't) outloud at work

[AOIIBrandi]

It helps if you ask me to do something rather than tell me to do it especially since 1) I am higher than you on the org chart and 2) We don't even work in the same dept. By the way I found out the other day what you told me to do was the opposite of what your boss really wanted - lucky for me I hadn't bothered to get to your stuff yet.

[FAB*SpiceySpice]

I know it's none of my business technically but will someone pleeeeeease tell me why that girl got fired today?? She was on my "team" (small office with 4 supervisors, each with a team/staff of 5 workers) and now I am picking up most of her caseload. Like I said, it's not really my business, but I am nosey and I WANT TO KNOW NOW. SOMEONE TELL ME.

[ZTAMich]

If you taught your kids about rules & limits AT HOME they'd be having a much easier transition to Pre-School!!

[winnieb]

Okay Mr Vice President- I realize you and in waaayyy over your head and you are looking to cya- but don't f--k with me! I will fight back and you will regret it! Don't forget last month you send a "lovely" email to the president implying that I wasn't keeping up on the assignment-- have you forgetten that I responded pointing out that you totally f'ed up the spreadsheet and all your data was skewed! Now today, I walk in and you were on speaker with my boss complaining about me, saying I need to pay closer attention to the same spreadsheet that was in question last month-- well again you jackass, read the mother- f'in spreadsheet and the color key on the first tab-- yellow highlight means i have the paperwork, not that i did anything with it-- so don't complain that i did something with it when i didn't do it!!! Learn your own job before you complain about me! You won't look like such a dumbass! So don't forget dumbass you f' with me- you will regret it!!

[midwesterngirl]

Lady you are a fricking idiot. Are you capable of thinking a thought completely through before you act on it? Number One, you are the moron who installed WHITE cabinetry in a daycare center. Really ,who makes such a moronic choice as that? Children hang out there for twelve hours a day 6 days a week. Did you think the cabinets were going to stay clean? Not to mention that it isn't my fault you are married to a control freak.

Number two, that plant,which is an outside plant by the way, note the piece of lattice trellis that came with it,is going to get knocked over where you insist on putting it. And hey, you know what. I may even accidently do it myself. When it does fall, it is going to hit your precious white cabinets too.

Please leave the decision making to those of us who actually know how to run a business since you are clearly not capable of doing so.

[texas*princess]

You know that episode of Sex & the City when Charlotte is interviewing people to take her place at that museum and then when they find the candidate she doesn't want to leave anymore?

That's what I feel like right now

[AlphaFrog]

STOP F*ing with my Excel formulas. I shouldn't REALLY have to go in and password protect cells to stop you from screwing up my cost sheet!

[Drolefille]

I can HEAR you talking to the person who you're interviewing for MY JOB.

Isn't there something wrong with that?

i wish i could walk around firing people that i know shouldn't be here

[APhi Sailorgirl]

Originally Posted by PoohsHoneyBee

i wish i could walk around firing people that i know shouldn't be here

AMEN! (and the incompetent ones)

I am doing the work of 4 people at the moment, you all are doing the work of one, and poorly at that, please stop whining to me about your "work issues."

[DeltAlum]

Something that maybe should be said...

"This is a no drama zone. Shut up and do some work..."

[AGDee]

You have re-imaged at least 50 PCs. Just because you have been focused on something else for two weeks doesn't mean you should have completely forgotten how to do this! Do you just totally freak out when we're under pressure to get something done quickly or are you just stupid??? It's faster to just do it myself than to ask you to do ANYTHING because you never remember how to do anything. READ THE DOCUMENTATION. It's step by step. That's why it's there.

I don't even want to go to work today and deal with this. I loved my job before you came along. I really need an assistant who has a brain.

[adpiucf]

Answer your @#%#^$ cell phone or turn it off. I think your ring tone has to be the most annoying sound ever invented.

[Sophist08edLady]

It's the end of the day...F*ck all ya'll be-aatches, I'm going home!!!

Originally Posted by Sophist08edLady

It's the end of the day...F*ck all ya'll be-aatches, I'm going home!!!

I agree! I have to hear "I'm Bossy" all day!